Chapter 14
Rixon
Rixon quietly stumbled into his chambers. He and Jessin had stayed out far too late, drinking far too much. It was not the kind of behavior he indulged in anymore—certainly not appropriate for a king—and yet, it had been exactly what he needed.
He froze at the sight of Mina asleep on the sofa. Her journal had fallen to the floor, a couple of charcoal pencils scattered about it. He studied her, the gentle rise and fall of her chest. His own softened.
It thoroughly infuriated him that she’d gone behind his back.
That she’d taken matters into her own hands with the assassin, as if he wasn’t capable of getting to the bottom of it himself.
That she’d resorted to using demons. The risk involved.
His fury overshadowed his hurt at her failing to come to him, which was all he’d asked of her that day.
His fist clenched.
Mina’s eyebrows pinched and she jerked, then fell still again. Beneath her eyelids, her eyes darted, restless. Was she having another of her nightmares?
He blew out a breath and crouched beside her, carefully picking up her journal.
He studied the charcoal strokes of her sketch, the dark cell and the assassin hanging limp.
The Jarg lurking in the corner. Darius Santos was written in bold, harsh letters.
She’d underlined the name and added question marks around it.
He closed the journal, placing it on the low table beside her pencils.
Then he stripped out of his clothes before lifting her gently and carrying her to bed.
She murmured and nestled against his neck.
Slowly, so as not to wake her, he set her on the bed and removed her nightgown, until there was only flesh between them.
Then he covered them both with blankets and curled himself around her.
“Rixon…?” she breathed, her voice thick with sleep.
“Shh, love, I’m here.” He nuzzled against her.
No matter how angry he was, no matter how deep this thing festered in him, he loved her. He loved her to the ends of the earth.
He just wished…
Well, perhaps he was being selfish about the whole thing. He’d sworn an oath, hadn’t he? He was her wielder.
But you are also a king, now, his mind whispered.
If he couldn’t control the things happening around him, the things happening between him and Mina, how could he hope to control what happened in his kingdom? The thought made his head spin. He winced, already regretting the amount he’d had to drink.
Sleep pulled him under.
When he woke, it wasn’t quite dawn. Mina’s body was draped over his chest, her breathing steady.
It took everything in him to control his need.
Physically, he wanted nothing more than to bury himself in her, to wake her up by coming on his cock.
Mentally, he wasn’t ready for that, not until he got his emotions under control.
Not until he figured out what to do with this desire to exert himself over her—fully and completely.
Besides, he was still fucking angry.
Rising so as not to disturb her, he dressed and slipped out. His father’s study was cold, so he lit a fire in the grate and set to work. Stacks of missives sat unanswered. He wasn’t sure he’d ever get ahead on them.
Dawn was spilling through the window when his steward stuck his head in. “Your Majesty. Shall I order some breakfast?”
He grunted in answer, the scratching of his quill never ceasing.
“Very well, I’ll return shortly.” Andrei closed the door.
He’d merely blinked before a servant appeared, tray in hand, his taste tester close behind. He offered another grunt of acknowledgement and continued, barely touching the food. Hours passed, consumed by the state of the kingdom.
He felt a tug inside his chest. The bond.
He blinked and glanced up to find Mina standing in the doorway, watching him.
She hesitated before stepping inside and closing them in.
He tossed his quill aside and leaned back, studying her.
She was dressed in red today, one of the many gowns he’d commissioned while she was away.
It dropped low over her chest, cinching at her waist and flaring at her hips, reminding him just how much he enjoyed holding those hips when he rutted her.
She’d never been one for gowns—preferred pants and things that were easy to move in. Was she doing this for him? A peace offering?
He blew out a breath and rubbed the bridge of his nose, fighting back the headache that bloomed behind his eyes. “Mina,” he said by way of greeting.
“Hi,” she breathed, still leaning against the door. “I wasn’t sure what dress you wanted me to wear today, so I thought this might be okay?”
He swallowed. It was more than okay. The question was, could he accept this as her way of apologizing? Was it enough to calm the chaos of emotions he felt in the wake of yesterday? To sooth his anger?
No—he needed to punish her. That was the only thing that would make him feel better. He just wasn’t sure how yet.
“It looks good on you.” He kept his tone neutral, to hide the fact that his dick was already hardening. The desk was enough to hide it.
She sucked her bottom lip between her teeth. “I’m not wearing anything underneath, in case you…” Her eyes darted to the surface of the desk, which was completely piled with correspondence and documents he still needed to review and sign.
His head fell back against the chair. Fuck, it would be so easy—so easy—to order her before him, to lift her and settle her on the desk’s surface, where he might devour her cunt with ease. Where he could bring her to the brink, over and over, torture her like he had the other night. And yet…
“Perhaps later, little witch. I need to make a dent in this.” His cock gave an angry throb at those words. What was wrong with him?!
Mina’s expression fell. She heard the dismissal for what it was. “I guess I’ll get back to my research then.”
“Mina.”
“Yes?” She froze, something like hope lighting in her eyes.
“What do you plan to do about Santos?”
“Oh.” Her shoulders dropped. He waited, daring her to say something that might illustrate just how little control he had over her. Instead, she surprised him by saying, “I was going to wait and see how you would like to proceed.”
“Good girl.”
Her cheeks flushed with the praise. It made him feel powerful. But he’d always had this kind of power over her, just as she did him. It was everything else that was out of his control.
When it was clear he had nothing left to say, she departed.
She hadn’t pressed him to talk about yesterday. Part of him was surprised, but also relieved. He wasn’t ready to confront this yet. Mostly because he was at war with himself.
He had no business settling something between them when he couldn’t figure out his feelings. Were they justified? Was he simply losing his mind and buckling under the pressure? How the fuck did his father do it?
He avoided Mina for the rest of the day.
It was all too easy. There was plenty to keep him busy, venturing out to meet with his merchant and shipping guilds.
He spent time inspecting the progress on the new training program for overland trade.
He met with his diplomats and ambassadors, including Weiss, about trade, about alliances, about procuring large quantities of Nebrine repellers.
By the time they settled at the dinner table, he acted as if none of his avoidance had been intentional.
Mina’s eyes might have lingered questioningly over him, but she didn’t say anything.
Instead, she told him about her day spent researching in the library and the restaurant she’d eaten lunch at with Anne and Elianna.
When he informed her that he’d be working late and not to wait for him, her expression fell.
Fuck, he was such a piece of shit for behaving like this.
“Can’t we…can’t we talk about it?” she asked, voice hushed as they made their way out of the dining hall to the upper floors.
He blew out a breath. “I need some time to sort out my thoughts, Mina.”
“I hate this, Rixon. You know I hate fighting with you.”
He almost snorted, considering he’d begged her to work things out between them before she’d run off. He’d had to wait weeks. It should have made him feel guilty that he was doing something similar. But he wasn’t running off.
Instead, he took her hands in his, twisting their fingers together, and said, “I’m struggling with a lot of fucked up control issues right now. I need to sort this out for myself before you and I work through what happened yesterday. Give me a little time, yes?”
Her throat bobbed but she nodded. He brushed his fingers over her cheek. When he leaned in to kiss her, she tried to hold him against her, to keep the kiss from ending, but eventually he pulled away. “Get some rest. You’re still not recovered from your journey.”
“Right.” Her expression was unreadable when she stepped back. “Is that an order?”
He blew out a breath. “Lady Witch, it would ease my mind if I knew you were well rested.”
“Okay…” She nodded.
They parted ways and he went to his study.
True to his word, he didn’t return until the early hours of the morning.
Mina appeared to be sleeping, but he wasn’t sure if she was faking it.
Either way, he was glad to play along. His eyes burned from being open too long, from squinting at all the documents he’d poured over for hours.
It was a relief when he pulled her warm body against his, felt her skin as he curled around her and dropped into a deep sleep.
When he woke, it was to find Mina had disappeared early.
His chest squeezed painfully. He shouldn’t have felt any kind of frustration or hurt over the matter, even if he felt a little of both.
Instead, he quickly readied himself for the day and threw himself back into his work.
He continued this behavior for the next three days, crossing paths with Mina only at dinner and when he fell into bed late at night, dragging her into his arms.