Chapter 29 Rose #2
“I think so.” I walk out the door, McGregor’s voice echoing along the corridor.
“Another four weeks should do it,” he says.
Blood whooshing in my ears, I open my eyes and I’m standing on a rolling hill with a solitary, crooked tree.
Memories rush through my head, old and new twisting together like a strangler fig smothering its host. I clutch my temples and draw in a deep lungful of humid air.
The longer we spend in the past, the worse it will get.
My stomach shrivels and I trudge across the grass toward the crooked tree. What if he’s already left?
Thunder rumbles beyond the hillside, the mountains in the distance hazed in menacing clouds.
I reach the tree and smirk at the small Alpha symbol carved into its base.
I plonk down onto the lush grass and lean against the tree.
Lightning flashes in the distance, those ominous clouds drifting closer.
I hack at my nails and wait, the light spatter of raindrops cooling my skin.
“Rose,” a warm voice calls behind me. My eyelids flutter closed, and I release my first free breath in months.
I stand and turn toward Parker, who’s crossing the quiet country road at the edge of the field.
Shame swirls like lava in my stomach, but I force my legs forward to meet him.
He’ll forgive me. Sporadic raindrops plop onto my skin, each gust of wind tugging strands from my braid.
The sky’s darkened in the short time since my arrival, the clouds now rumbling directly overhead.
Parker meets me in the center of the field with a wide grin. He yanks me in for a hug and I relax in his arms, breathing him in. My heart twitches. Traitor!
After a moment, he pulls away, holding me at arm’s length as he searches my face. “What happened? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. I just needed some time.”
His smile falters, the light behind his eyes dimming. “Some time? What are you talking about?”
Thunder booms, and the clouds above us relent, drenching us both.
“Let’s get out of here and I’ll explain,” I call over the torrential rain.
Parker’s eyes narrow. “Explain it to me now.”
I cringe. He wants to have it out here. “I wasn’t well, Parker. You know that. Holding you with me was getting to be too much. I needed to put myself first for once.” A bolt of lightning flashes across the sky and I flinch.
“So… you left me here?” His despondent tone claws at my insides.
“Don’t look at me like that. I knew you’d be safe here. You need to understand—”
“Understand? I’ve been waiting here in this field all day,” he calls over the storm.
“It’s been a little bit longer than a day.” I clear my throat. “For me.”
His face scrunches, and his narrowed gaze shoots to mine. “Are you serious? How long?”
I bite the inside of my cheek, and a coppery tang fills my mouth. “You felt my echo. You know I—”
“How long, Rose?” his voice raises.
Lightning strikes at the same time thunder booms, the sound reverberating through my chest. The storm’s now directly above us; water pools in my Docs.
“Long enough for McGregor to develop a cure.” Parker scans the cloud-hazed view, the skin around his eyes pinched.
The silence eats me alive. “I want to take you to him right now.”
“How long exactly?” Parker yells, and I wince.
“Almost ten months,” I say, so softly I’m surprised he hears.
He draws in a sharp breath. “It took McGregor much longer. I’ve been jumping forward a month or so at a time, checking in and tracking his progress.
Giving him blood.” Mariella’s blood, but Parker doesn’t need to know that.
“I want to take you to him now.” His frown eases as my words sink in.
“Parker, if this works, McGregor says you’ll have your traveling back tonight. ”
His eyes flash, but he keeps his arms crossed. “Fine,” he mutters, stepping toward me.
We stare at each other for a moment as the downpour eases. His strong jaw flexes, the glow in his eyes lacking their tint of amusement.
“I missed you,” I say.
“Obviously not enough,” he grumbles.
“If it’s any consolation, it’s been a brutal year.
And no matter what happens after this, I don’t want us to go our separate ways.
” The words spill out of me. I’d planned to wait until his powers were restored, but what if it doesn’t work?
I need him to know, no matter what, he can trust me the way I trust him.
“What?” he says. His wide eyes search mine.
I wipe the dark, wet strands of hair from my face.
“My parents abandoned me as a baby, so I’ve always thought…
I was meant to be alone. Like some fucked-up part of me thought it was what I deserved.
Then we went to Neurovida and I got comfortable, and Matthews screwed us over, and Flame—I couldn’t let anyone in and risk being abandoned again.
I thought being alone would be easier… I was wrong.
I’m sorry for pushing you away. And…” I force the last words out, low and rushed. “You’re my family too.”
He’s silent for a moment, his light brown eyes boring into mine. He tilts his head, cocking a wet brow. “You haven’t turned soft, have you?”
A smile tugs at my lips. “I mean, if I’m begging to have you back, my situation’s obviously dire.”
“Obviously.” The corner of his mouth kicks up into a smirk, one I’ve deeply missed, but it fades. “Rose, there’s something I need to tell you.”
“Okay.” I’m ready. Whatever Parker’s plan is, I trust him.
“When I get my powers back…” He runs a hand through his hair. “I want to reunite the Alphas.”
Warmth rushes through my chest. He wants us all together again. It might not be the same as before, but—
“Yes,” I say. This is far better than anything I’d anticipated. I was expecting Parker to tell me he was staying in the past with Ella or had some crazy plan to bring her with us back to our time. But this? It’s a dream come true.
“All the Alphas. Besides Matthews,” he adds. “And I want to go back to Neurovida.”
“But—they shot at us, Parker. They think we’re traitors. We can’t go back.”
“We’ll expose Matthews before he turns Neurovida against us,” Parker says, his eyes wide. “Before everything.”
“What?” I stare at him.
“I want to change the past,” he says.
And there it is. The secret he’s kept from the moment he saw Ella. The heat in my chest dissipates. “You can’t. It’s impossible.”
“We don’t know that,” he argues, stepping toward me.
“Yes. We do. It’s the first thing we learned at Neurovida,” I say.
“But what if they were wrong?” His eager eyes search mine. “I believe there’s a reason we have this gift, Rose, other than to sit around and rewatch our lives. A reason each time traveler has special skills that are unique only to them.”
“What if there’s not? How many memories are you going to damage before you accept defeat? How long are you going to spend playing God?”
His voice lowers. “As long as it takes to save her.”
My stomach drops with my exhale. “Parker—I’m fucking tired. I just want to go somewhere that feels remotely safe and exist for a while. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life meddling in the past.” I turn away from him. “I’m not cut out for it.”
“I’ll carry you,” he says, placing a hand on my shoulder. “You won’t have to travel anymore. I’ll do it for you. You can rest.”
I shake my head. “What you’re asking… it’s a pipe dream.”
Parker’s jaw tenses. “It’s not a pipe dream. Before we left Neurovida, McGregor was doing research, and he believed it was possible.” He lifts his chin. “And so do I.”
I shake my head. “And if it’s not?”
“Then we’ll figure it out.” He steps closer. “Rose, I don’t want to do this without you. Please help me?”
I should say no. But what’s the point? Once Parker gets an idea stuck in his head, nothing will change his mind.
We either stick together and I help him, or we go our separate ways, like I’d always planned.
I stare into his light brown eyes, and my decision is made for me.
I want him with me. Even if it means spending the rest of my life in the past. I don’t care if every time I look at him my breath hitches in my throat.
I don’t care if my feelings for him never completely fade.
It’s a small price to pay. I can’t explain why or how, but somehow, I know, our lives will be forever intertwined.
I cross my arms over my chest. “Fine. I’ll help you.” The faces of the Alphas flash through my mind, and something dangerously close to hope swirls in my chest. “But we find Axis and Bandit first.”
Parker’s eyes dart back and forth between mine, a slow smile spreading across his face. “Really?”
“Don’t get your hopes up. I don’t believe changing the past is possible, but if any privileged asshole is going to do it, it’ll be you. And I sort of owe you one for leaving you.”
The corner of his mouth kicks up. “Just one?”
“If anything, Jimmy, you owe me for carrying your intolerable ego for all those months.” I hold my hand out to him, electricity spiraling through my fingers. “You ready?”
“Almost.” He rubs the back of his neck. “I want to talk about what you said the day you brought me here.”
I groan and cover my face with my hands. “Can we not?”
He pries my hands away. “I’ll say it once, then we can never talk about it again.”
“Ugh, fine. Get it over with.”
“I love you,”—another mortified groan from me—“and it might not be the way you want me to, but we’re family and I’m not going anywhere. And I’ll always be here for you, no matter—”
“Parker, I know. We’re friends and nothing will change that. Now are you done?”
He looks upward, mouth pinched to the side as he torments me. Then his eyes return to mine, and a goofy smile crosses his lips. “Yep.”
“Thank fuck. Let’s go.” I check my watch and grasp his shoulder.
Parker’s weight presses against me as I search for the door handle in the dark. We both stumble out of the small cleaning closet near McGregor’s office.