Wolfkissed

Chapter 75

CHAPTER SEVENTY-FIVE

ROSAMUND

“Rosamund?”

“Hm?” I feel as if I’m inside a fluffy pink cloud with birds singing. Head in the clouds, quite literally.

“Didn’t you hear a word I said?” Darian snorts. “Gods above, lady.”

“Sorry.”

“You’re in love.”

“I am.” I can’t stop smiling. “Not a crime, is it?”

“Not at all.” His gaze softens. “I’m glad you reciprocate his feelings. It’s hard when you find your fated bondmate, and she rejects you.”

“It’s true, then?”

“Valen never told you?”

I shake my head. “Not in so many words.”

“It’s tricky, realizing you share a bond with someone. You don’t want to affect their feelings and decisions by telling them. Sometimes a bond is only one-sided.”

“That can happen?”

“It has happened a number of times,” Darian says quietly. “It’s always hard on the one who has felt it, but that’s how life is.”

“But then his feelings...”

“Are real. The bond is a pull, but it’s not always accompanied by love.

There are stories of fated mates who hated each other.

” He smiles. “If Valen says he loves you, it’s the truth.

He never lies. Besides, one has to be blind not to see it.

He lights up when he’s around you. When he talks about you. Hells, he’s wearing your collar.”

“What does that mean?”

“That he belongs to you. He’ll make a good husband. Devoted. Faithful. Loving. That rascal is a good man.”

“I know.”

“However, if he ever hurts you, come to me. I’ll kick his ass down the mountain.”

I snicker. “Ouch.”

“He told us to protect you. And we will. You are family now.”

“Aw…”

“And you will be officially family after the ceremony.”

I blink at him. “What ceremony?”

“The bonding ceremony. He didn’t mention it, either?”

“No.” Nervousness grips me. “I suppose it involves eating, drinking, dancing, that sort of thing?”

“Oh, no. It’s a private affair, though you can invite your friends and family for the party afterward. It involves knotting, rutting, and biting.” He frowns. “What is Valen doing? Hasn’t he even explained this much to you? Maybe he deserves a kick in the balls.”

“We were talking about other matters,” I say, flustered.

“You’re defending him!” His brows rise. “Oh yeah, this girl has feelings for the big bad wolf.”

We have spent most of our time here kissing, truth be told, though I’m not about to tell that to Darian. He teases us enough as it is. Valen was right. His friends are like overgrown puppies, annoying and lovable.

That’s what he called me. Lovable.

My heart melted then, and it’s been a pleasurable ache in my chest ever since. That’s me when I’m with him: a puddle on the floor, undone by his desire and affection.

“Fucking Gods,” Darian says, “you’re thinking about him, aren’t you? Can’t even hear a word I’m saying.”

I wince. “Sorry, sorry…”

“No, you’re not.” He laughs. Then sobers up. “After what happened to him once his mother vanished, it’s so fucking great to see him happy again.”

I frown. “What are you talking about?”

“He didn’t tell you about…?” He swallows hard. “He didn’t tell you. I see.”

“Tell me, what? Does it have to do with the scars on his back? And the long time it took him to start looking for her?”

He nods. “You figured it out.”

“Hardly. He has never mentioned anything, but I…” I shiver. “I wondered. How bad was it?”

“Bad enough to make us all think he wouldn’t survive it. Bad enough to give him screaming nightmares, though he’s been doing much better.”

“What happened, Dar?”

He shakes his head. “This is a mistake. He should be the one telling you the story. Maybe I shouldn’t keep opening my big mouth, and let him do it in his own time.”

“Please, Darian.”

He regards me for some time in silence. Then he says, “Didn’t he tell you he offered himself to the temple? Not that of the Goddess Cassia, though. He chose to submit to the God of war and chaos, Ares.”

“Oh, that. Yes, he mentioned something.”

“I think he was hoping to gather clues as to his mother’s fate. Or maybe he wanted to punish himself because he felt that her disappearance was his fault.”

“Why?”

“Losing someone can feel that way sometimes. He told them he was a tribute, a voluntary victim. I don’t think he even knew what he was signing up for. He was too young to realize.”

“He must have still been a child,” I whisper.

“He was. Barely an adolescent. They kept him for years. Almost a decade.”

I press the heels of my palms into my eyes. “Oh my Gods…”

“At first, we didn’t know where he had gone.

We searched and searched and asked.” Darian sits down.

“It was fucking awful. Then an old man on the mountain said he’d heard rumors of a slave, a boy that the temple people dragged along to do their heavy work, and…

well, that white tuft on his head is so particular.

We asked the temple, negotiated and bargained, and finally, got him out of there. ”

“But he found out a name,” I whisper, “and came to my home.”

“He said he had a vision,” Darian says. “From the Goddess.”

“I have to talk to him.” I’m already starting for the door. “Sorry, got to go.”

“Go find your man. And, Rosamund?”

“Just Rosie, please.”

“Rosie, listen… what I said earlier about bondmates and fate, it’s valid about the bonding ritual, too.”

I stop. “What do you mean?”

“Valen won’t push for it. He probably meant to talk to you about it later, while he walks around with a knot and a permanent hard-on.

And I don’t mean to push you, either, but if you want to go through with it, experience a werewolf bonding…

then you should tell him. Valen is an old-fashioned gentleman, raised in the old ways by his mother.

He’d rather die of arousal than push you. ”

“I understand.”

“Do you want it? Are you ready for it?”

It’s weird talking about what is essentially a deviant sexual act, a bestial practice between my man and me… with his friend. Then again, I’m so out of my depth here, and since Valen is putting off telling me, I’m glad Darian told me.

Do I want it? Am I ready for it?

Valen has been sort of avoiding me since we arrived, truth be told. I’m aching to touch him and be touched by him, but all I get are kisses and growled curses.

I need to get to the bottom of this. Is he avoiding me because of his history or something else?

What else don’t I know?

“This is my ancestral home,” Valen says. “Where I grew up. And my room is down the hall.”

I hear him with half an ear, Darian’s words still echoing inside my head. “What, no brothers or sisters? I thought wolves had big litters.”

“I’m an only child, and yeah, it’s unusual among the wolves. Then again, my mother was an unusual woman. A priestess. She lived her life her way.”

“She sounds pretty amazing.”

“She was.”

I swallow hard. “I’m so sorry. So sorry for her death.”

“She made her choices, and they hurt you, so I’m sorry, too.” He takes my hand, leading me toward his room. “Mentally, she was unwell, and I was too young to see it. It’s obvious by now that she was involved with the rogue wolves who killed your family, and I have to dig into that, find out more.”

“Do you think the temple has connections to the rogue groups?”

“That’s my thinking. I’ll ask for an audience with the wolven king to discuss this, but only after I’ve spent time with you. After you’ve decided whether we’re staying here or moving elsewhere.”

“You’d really do that? Move away to be with me?”

“Oh, woman… I’d do anything to be with you. Haven’t you figured that out yet? Don’t you believe me?” He turns to look into my eyes. “You are my life. You are my everything.”

My eyes smart. “You mean it,” I whisper. “About me being important to you.”

“How can you doubt it?”

I shrug. “I’ve spent most of my life not being important to anyone. I’ve never had anyone look at me the way you do, Valen. Never had anyone promise me such things. Besides, compared to your family and friends, you barely know me.”

“And yet, I know I want to spend my life with you.”

Pulling away from him, I walk around his spacious room. I touch the tall headboard with carved scenes of wolves hunting deer, the nook in the wall with a dark statuette of a goddess, a crown of silver stars on her head, and the tall window with its wooden lattice.

I don’t want him to run away with me. He spent a decade away from his family and his life here.

He’s a fighter, but he feels things… too deeply.

He’s loved here, and he needs this. And maybe…

I need it, too. His love is everything, but having his friends and family around us feels nice, like a warm embrace.

“What’s on your mind?” He stops by the bed, one hand resting on the carved headboard, his eyes shining, head slightly bowed.

Gods, he’s beautiful, the shape of his broad shoulders, the line of his long neck, the tips of his pointed ears poking out of his gray-silver hair.

“Let’s stay here,” I say.

“Are you sure?” He approaches me and takes my hands. “I’d go to the ends of the world for you. Nothing and nobody matters more than you, love, and I’ll keep proving it to you every day.”

“Then why are you putting distance between us?” I ask, distracted from my goal of getting him to talk to me about his past.

He frowns. “It’s just…”

“Just what?”

“I don’t trust myself around you,” he growls softly. “I’ve been not only hard but in a rut over you since I met you. A rut is when a male wolf gets permanently horny about his mate. His knot inflates. His cock is hard. His balls are full. And all he wants is to breed his mate.”

“Breed. As in, make babies?”

A nod. “Of course, we have herbs to prevent that. My point is… I don’t want to push you or hurt you. I want you to come to me in your own time.”

“But you’re in pain.”

“I can take it, Princess. I’m fine with it. Worse would be to have an unwilling partner. Worse still, to harm you in any way, physical or mental.”

“I’ve seen your knot and your cock. Touched them. Put my mouth around your hard-on.”

“Fuck… Think I’d ever forget that?” His eyes grow hooded. “I relive those moments in my dreams every night.”

“Then?”

“Knotting you is quite another thing. You haven’t even had my cock inside you, let alone my knot. Our females… they have what they call a ‘heat’ when they get very aroused and loosen up for us. I don’t know how difficult it would be for a human to take my knot.”

“I want to try.” I swallow hard. “I really want you. I want you to knot me and bite me.”

“The bonding ritual,” he breathes. “You know about it. Someone has been talking.”

“Yes. Mark me as yours, Valen. I need you. Can’t you tell? Can’t you smell how much I want you?”

“Oh, Princess…” His grin is sharp. “I live in your scent. I’d bathe in it if I could. I know you’re aroused, that you desire me, but it’s not that simple.”

“It is, to me. I want you. If you want me, then why aren’t we naked?”

“Princess,” he growls. “Are you sure? If we start this, stopping will be rough. Holding myself back for so long means my control is threadbare. To be clear: I will stop if you ask me to, but don’t tease me if your mind isn’t into it. You’ll break my heart, and my dick, too.”

I almost laugh, but I remember touching him and going down on him, his groans and bitten-off curses. The way his cum had sprayed all over his broad chest.

Now I wish I had tasted it, swallowed it.

Taken a part of him into me, just like I took his cock in my mouth, his fingers in my pussy.

And that swollen, hard cock of his, I want it…

I need it to fill me up, mark me in ways nobody else has.

I want his hands everywhere, his mouth, his tongue, his teeth, his breath.

I want to bathe in his scent. I want bruises that will show everyone that I’m his.

“Woman, your scent, godsdammit…” He groans. His hands shake ever so slightly as he caresses my face. “Tell me what you want. There’s a war in my head, because I’m fucking dying to tear your clothes off and take you.”

“So what’s stopping you?”

Another throaty chuckle. “Like I said, my control. I’m afraid it will snap, even for a moment, and I might hurt you. I think…” He takes a breath. “I think you should tie me up.”

“Tie you up? I thought you hated that.”

“I’d do anything to be with you.” His gaze grows dark, pupils dilating. “Besides, I can break the rope easily. It will just remind me to slow down.”

For some reason, the idea thrills me. “Where will I find rope?”

“The curtains.” He points. “Get the holdbacks. They should be long enough.”

I scramble away and get them, letting the heavy curtains fall closed over the tall window. I brandish the slim ropes at him.

He laughs. “I’m ready.”

“Not yet.” I take his hand and pull him toward the bed. “It’s my turn to seduce you. Show you what I’ve learned. What I desire. What I need.”

“Damn, that’s so hot.” His sharp canines flash. “Show me, Princess. Show me how to make you happy.”

“You already are,” I tell him truthfully, pushing him to sit on the mattress.

“Show me how to give you what you need, then. Teach me. I’m your humble student.”

“Shut up.” I grin as I kneel on the bed and slide my hands up his hard chest. “And let me feel you.”

“I’m all yours, baby. Always yours. From the start and to the end of time.”