Chapter 29
BIG SECRET
Over a month later, Dean realized he had nothing under control at all.
He and Molly still had their weekly dinner date alone, but the rest of the time, they spent it as the three of them.
It was her idea. That he was a package deal and she loved being around Jonah.
The more his son warmed up to Molly, the more Jonah’s inner devil came out. Nothing horrible, more tiredness and stubbornness, but he wasn’t always on his best behavior.
Yet Molly never had an issue with it.
Not once.
And those weekly alone dinners, that was his doing. Because he felt she deserved to have a little time where she was the center of attention in a good way.
That it could be about them and not him as a single father. Or her hanging with him and his son.
He never thought he’d look forward to time with someone as much as he did her and wondered what was keeping him from saying he loved her.
But she gave no indication of what she was feeling so that was holding him back as much as his secret was.
After growing up in his household where the only love was for a green Benjamin, he figured he could do without it in his life.
He found he was wrong.
Not only with Jonah, but now with a woman.
But Molly was busy and so was he. He wondered if she was putting more into the relationship than him since she came to have lunch with him at least once a week. But could that be love or just companionship? She almost never came to the bar at night and part of him was okay with that.
Not that he worried she’d see him talking with other women, but maybe he didn’t want to see other men talking with her.
Or feel as if he had to entertain her when he was working.
He still had a job to do. He still took his business seriously.
It was part of his identity.
Of who he was.
Yet he hadn’t even hinted at that part of his life and felt like shit he was keeping it from her.
But you know what, she was right. People had money and didn’t need to disclose those things early in a relationship.
Maybe it was a lie he was telling himself.
She’d settled into her “new” life. Not that it was new for him, but she seemed so happy with the way she looked.
But his past few months with Molly definitely made him realize what he was missing in life and that he needed to find a way to get more of it.
And why was it this big secret anyway? Was it because he moved here and didn’t want anyone to know and now he was used to it?
No, it was fear.
He was wealthy.
Stinking rich family wealth on top of it.
She didn’t like people giving judgments on him and now he’d backed himself into a corner.
It’d come up a few times and he could have laughed it off that he wasn’t just a bartender. Just a bar manager.
That he owned the place.
That he was even considering a second location.
But nope. He was so used to keeping to himself that even when he was in love, he couldn’t open up like she’d been doing.
That he’d encouraged her to be the person who makes her the happiest and yet didn’t follow his own damn rules.
He ran a hand over his face, hating that he was so stressed over this.
Even Jonah was now asking why Molly wasn’t over enough.
Or maybe it was last night when his son asked, “Is Molly going to be my mom. I like her and she likes me, right? I don’t have one of them. You always told me to ask you if there was something I wanted.”
Talk about putting the pressure on and not even knowing.
He couldn’t even remember how he had answered Jonah. But whatever it was had been good enough because his son could be stubborn and ask for something twenty times and hadn’t.
He was just getting in his SUV to go to work when his phone rang. He pulled it out of his pocket and saw it was his mother calling. He hadn’t spoken to her in six months easily. Hell, he hadn’t even talked to Willow since she’d left after her surprise visit.
He wanted to send it to voicemail but then told himself she didn’t call often and it might be important.
“Hello.”
“Dean. I wasn’t sure if I’d catch you. Or that you’d answer.”
“I always answer if I can,” he said.
“That’s right. You do. You talk to us when we call, but you never call us.”
This was the reason. They blamed him for everything. For having a set of balls that no one else had.
“Is there a reason for this call?” he asked. “I’m just pulling out of the garage and going to work.”
“You own the bar, you can come and go when you want,” his mother pointed out.
“I can. But I’ve got a lot going on.”
“You need to come home,” his mother said.
“Why?” he asked. “The holidays are a few months away and I’m not sure I can make it.” He wasn’t even lying about it this time. His parents came the first two years that Jonah was alive and last year they wanted him there.
It wasn’t possible when Jonah got sick and he didn’t want to travel at that point.
They weren’t happy but he was putting his kid first.
Something his parents never did.
“It’s Grandpa. He had a heart attack and it’s not good. He wants to see you.”
“You couldn’t lead with that? You had to start the conversation by criticizing me?” Some things would never change.
“We don’t know how bad it is. He needs to have a pacemaker and possibly a few valves repaired and, well, you know any surgery is a risk. He’s in ICU now and he is asking for you.”
There were so many things going through his head. His grandfather and he hadn’t had much more than a few words to say to each other since Dean returned the trust fund check and said he wasn’t going to medical school.
His grandfather hadn’t met Jonah once. Hadn’t even acknowledged his first great grandchild.
Because you know, the circumstances behind it were a smear on the Easton name.
Fuck them and that name.
His kid came first then.
The old man’s heart probably had enough of his dictatorship and couldn’t take any more.
“Why does he want to see me? We don’t even get along. We haven’t spoken in years on top of it. You know how I feel about this.”
He’d made no secret about it to anyone that their treatment of Jonah was the last straw and he’d stay in contact, but not much more.
“He wants you. You’re the only one he wants to see before he goes in for surgery.”
It was almost too much to take in. After all these years, none of it made any damn sense.
“When is his surgery?”
“Friday morning,” his mother said.
“That’s two days from now.”
“You always were a smart one.”
“Do you really think now is the time for sarcasm?”
He was running everything through his mind.
Carly would stay with Jonah. It was for the best.
Bringing his son there for the first time was only going to be a distraction for everyone.
“You’re right. I’m sorry. We are all upset over this. Please say you’ll be here. He hasn’t asked you for anything in years.”
“Only for the first twenty-two years of my life.”
“And you still got what you wanted,” his mother snapped. “You walked away from us and did your own thing.”
“Are you jealous over that?” he asked, his schedule and son’s routine flashing through his mind.
“Of course not,” she said.
“It sounded it to me. Any one of you could have left and done your own thing, but you are all too attached to the money. Willow lasted four days.”
His mother snorted. “Willow likes to complain, but she’ll never make it on her own.”
“That’s sad. First, that you think it, and second, that you probably encourage it. Maybe you should help her stand on her own two feet.” Not that his mother ever did it herself.
His mother was silent and then finally said, “When can we expect you?”
No mention of him bringing Jonah either. Not that she’d like to see her only grandson.
All the more reason he had to do this alone.
“I’ll get there sometime tomorrow and go see Grandpa tomorrow night.”
He hung the phone up and walked back into the house.
“Everything okay?” Carly asked.
“Dad, are you staying home with me today?”
“Sorry, bud. Carly, can I talk to you for a minute? Jonah, why don’t you go upstairs and play?”
“I don’t want to. I want to know what you’re going to say.”
“I’ll tell you when I’m done talking to Carly. Go,” he said, waving his hand.
Jonah stomped off and he rolled his eyes.
There were worse things in life than your kid wanting to spend time with you.
“What’s going on?”
“My mother just called. My grandfather had a heart attack.”
“Oh, dear. I’m sorry.”
“Yeah,” he said, clearing his throat. He hated that he didn’t feel much about that news, but he wouldn’t be a dick either. “He is asking to see me and no one else before surgery on Friday.”
“Do you find that odd?”
“Everything about my family and my life is odd,” he said. “This isn’t anything different. But I’m already being blamed for everything else, so I’m not going to have this on my shoulders. I don’t want to bring Jonah.”
“Of course not. I wouldn’t even let you. Go and do what you need to.”
“I’ve never been away from him for twenty-four hours before.”
He didn’t like the way it was making him feel either.
“He’ll be fine. And he’ll be so excited when you come back. I’ll make plans with him for the time you’re away.”
“Thanks.” He jogged to the front of the house and up the stairs where Jonah was coloring.
“Can I come down now?”
“I’m sorry. Sometimes it’s just easier to talk without you interrupting. Daddy has to go away for a few days.”
“Where are we going?”
He groaned. “Just me. I need to go see my family in New York City. My grandfather is sick and he’s asking to see me.”
“Who’s that?”
He ground his teeth. “You’ve never met him. He’s older and had a heart attack. He’s sick. But it’s best if I go alone. I won’t be long. I promise. Carly is going to have some fun things planned.”
“How about Molly? Is she going with you?”
“No. She’s got to work. I’m going alone.”
“You’ll call me when you’re gone?”
“I will. I’m not leaving until tomorrow. I’ll see you tonight and tomorrow. I promise.”
He lifted his hand and let Jonah slap it. “Bye, Dad.”
“Bye, bud.”
He returned to his car and drove out, but knew he had to tell Molly something too.
He sent her a text to see if she could call when she had a minute.
The phone rang almost immediately. “That was fast,” he said.
“I figured it had to be important.”
“It is. I need to go to New York City tomorrow. I’m not sure how long I’ll be there.”
“Is everything okay with your family?”
“No. My mother called. My grandfather had a heart attack and is having open heart surgery on Friday morning. He’s asking to see me before then.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry, Dean. Do you want me to go with you?”
He never expected that. “No, I’m good. I appreciate the offer though.”
“If you want, I can. I don’t have to meet your family or anything if you don’t want me to. I know it’s kind of early for that, but I just wanted to be there for you.”
Because as close as they’d gotten, he still hadn’t met Erika or seen Ruby again.
It’s like they were both moving slow even if his heart was at the finish line.
“Thanks. I can’t tell you how much that means to me. But I’m good. Carly is going to stay with Jonah. He’d only get in the way.”
“I... I care about you,” she said.
“Just care?” he asked and wondered why he was picking up a box of matches with the gasoline all around his feet.
“More than care,” she said. “I know we don’t talk about it much, but you mean a great deal to me.”
“You mean a great deal to me too.” It felt wonderful to at least get that much off his chest.
“Would you run off the road if I said I was falling in love with you?”
He laughed. He’d heard the uncertainty in her voice. “No. I wouldn’t run at all.”
“Then I think I love you, Dean,” she said. “It’s all new to me. I’m not positive, but what I feel for you is more than I’ve ever thought I’d feel for another person.”
“I feel the same way.” And that pressure that had been there for months started to fade away. But only so much.