Chapter 40 Remington
Remington
Kinsley Renee Brooks. Six pounds eight ounces.
Twenty-one inches long. And the sweetest, most precious birthday gift I have ever gotten in my entire life.
Looking down at my perfect niece, wrapped in her special sheep blanket, I am in awe.
She is so little. Her wisps of blonde hair are so soft.
The pucker of her lips and the shape of her nose are identical to Deck.
Fuck, I miss him. I hold Kinsley a little tighter and wish this day was different for her and for Sutton.
I can’t even imagine how hard it is for my sister.
She has a perfect baby girl, but the man she loves is not here.
Looking down at my niece I make a vow to her and to Deck to always be here for her and protect her.
I can’t be her dad, but I can still be a positive male figure in her life.
After I dropped off Lainey at home so she could rest, I pick up Eli because I have a mission to accomplish quickly, and I need his help.
We hit the hardware store for the supplies that I have on my list and head over to Sutton’s house.
We let ourselves in with my spare key, haul everything up to the nursery, and I see the room for the first time.
The white crib is pushed up against a plain white wall, waiting for me to hopefully create something special for Kinsley.
The rest of the walls are a very soft, blush pink.
My mom and Lainey painted them last week.
They also have boxes of supplies and decorations they ordered waiting to be put up, a bookshelf, and a rocking chair that needs to be unboxed and assembled.
Eli is going to tackle those things while I start on the mural.
“Does Lainey know that you are doing this?” Eli asks me as he takes in the space.
“Nope.”
“Won’t she ask questions after she comes over when you bring Sutton home and the room is done?” He side-eyes me, like keeping my secret will be impossible after today.
“I am just going to tell her that Sutton talked to her friend and asked me to let them in to do the work. Sutton knows that I want the journal to be a surprise and not to tell her about it. I had to explain it to Sutton about the drawings I was doing so she wouldn’t let it slip.
Same for my parents. They want to make sure it’s special for Lainey, so they won’t tell her before I do.
My family, like you, knows my art is private, but I wanted to cover my bases, ya know? ” I shrug.
“Yeah, well, girls talk. And those girls are as close as you can get, so it’s not far off to think that some secrets might slip out,” he says nervously.
Clapping me on the shoulder he moves over to the pile of boxes, pulls out a pocketknife, slices open the package on top, and he says, “What the hell! I thought this was all decorations and shit, man.” He groans as he holds up nipple cream and some kind of padding for a nursing bra.
Cracking up I say, “I don’t know what’s in all that.
I am sure it is a minefield of baby supplies.
Sutton and Lainey have been ordering things, plus friends and family that were not able to come to her baby shower have also sent her stuff.
She was not really in a headspace to be able to open them all. ”
Eli’s smile falls. “I’m so sorry. I still can’t believe he’s not here. It feels like it happened yesterday and years ago all at the same time.”
“I know what you mean. Time feels totally off balance ever since Deck died. But it made me realize I don’t want to waste it, that’s for sure.
” I finish setting up my supplies and slide the crib away from the wall.
The girls’ plan is for a field of wildflowers and sheep to match the blanket that Deck sent playing out across the blank wall.
Strokes and lines start dancing in my mind.
My fingers are twitching and ready to get to work. I pick up my brushes.
“That’s why you officially moved Lainey into your house?” Eli asks, breaking my concentration.
“It was part of it, yeah. But I want more. I want everything with her, Eli. I love her.” I look at him, wishing he would allow himself the opportunity to find love and not just the chase of temporary lust.
“Dude, everyone that is around the two of you for three seconds can tell you are both over the moon for each other. You are basically a walking heart-eyed emoji following her around.” He cracks himself up, opening another box; this one reveals a nursing pillow covered in little pink hearts.
“I’m going to ask her to marry me,” I announce, calmly rolling paint onto the wall, never more sure of a decision in my life.
“Holy shit. Don’t you wanna finish unpacking her boxes first?” He gives me a teasing grin.
“You know that’s all done, dipshit. We just had the party. And it feels right. Some people might think it’s fast, but I have known from the minute I met her that she was different.”
“I’m really happy for you, Rem. Truly.” Striding across the space, Eli clasps me in a tight hug. “Let’s finish this room, yeah?”
“We don’t have a lot of time, but I think we will barely make it under the wire. And then I was thinking on one of our next days off, you could come with me to look at some rings?” I can’t hold back my smile when I look over at my best friend.
“Hell, yes! I have excellent taste . . . Um, but maybe we should consult one of the girls?” He rubs the back of his neck apprehensively.
Laughing I tell him, “Don’t worry, I already asked Kendra to help me, and she said yes.”
“What the fuck! You told Kendra before me? That’s not fair, I’m your damn brother.” He crosses his thick arms over his chest, ready to argue.
“Well, I wasn’t going to. But she cornered me at the housewarming party demanding to know my intentions with ‘her bestie,’ and I just gave it to her straight. Figured that was for the best.” I give him a knowing look.
“Yup, alright. You did the right thing. Kendra is tiny but can be scary as shit when she wants to be.” He grimaces.
“Don’t I know it.”
Laughing we get back to work, making a special space for Sutton and Kinsley to come home to.