Chapter 6
Vivian
I run out and stand in the parking lot, trying to steady my breathing.
“Please not now,” I whisper.
Breathe in, breathe out.
Hold.
Breathe in, breathe out.
I start fidgeting with my wedding ring hanging on my chest, closing my eyes and trying to focus on my breathing, but it doesn’t work so I sit down on a bench hidden in the shadows and comb my hands through my hair, tugging at it because I’m frustrated.
“What am I supposed to do, Trev?” I ask, as if he’s next to me that he’s able to answer all my questions. But he’s not.
I close my eyes and tilt my head back, feeling the breeze on my face.
Breathe in, breathe out.
Breathe in, breathe out.
I hear clicking of boots getting closer; it’s Mindy. I’ve completely ruined her night.
“I’m so sorry, Mindy,” I gasp, struggling to catch my breath. “I just couldn’t be in there, I just couldn’t.” My voice stutters as tears stream down my cheeks.
She quickly pulls me into a hug. “Don’t apologize, okay? It’s my fault for bringing you here in the first place.” She pulls away and holds my hand tightly. “I’m the one who’s sorry, Viv.”
The thing is, I was having such a great time until all the memories started flooding back. It felt like I was being unfaithful.
“It’s okay. I agreed to come here. It’s not your fault.
” I sniff, wiping away my tears. “No, I mean I always loved it here.” I lift my head from her shoulder and gaze at the entrance.
“The thing is, it’s not just the place,” I admit quietly.
“It was the dancing, the singing, the laughing with Miles. That was our thing, mine and Trev’s.
And now, here I am, with a guy I shouldn’t even be around.
” I shake my head, my voice dipping lower.
“Because I know what he wants, and I’m just…
not ready for that. Maybe I’m deepening it way too much but I don’t know… ”
I feel confused.
I close my eyes, bracing for her response.
When I open them, her gaze is soft, her eyes glossy with unshed tears.
“I know this is going to sound so cliché,” she says gently.
“But he’d want you to be happy. He’d want you to laugh again, to have fun, to make new memories, even in the places where you two hold memories.
” She continues, her voice soft and soothing.
“He would hate seeing you upset in the places that used to make you feel happy.”
I process her words, thinking about it properly and realize she has a point. And I know he’d be devastated to see me like this. It’s been almost two years, and I’m still grieving, but there’s no rulebook for this. No timeline that says when it should stop. You just…learn to live with it. Somehow.
I did it with my mom.
Now I’m doing it with Trevor.
“I feel like a complete idiot for how I’ve acted,” I admit quietly.
Mindy shakes her head and gives me a gentle nudge.
“You’re not an idiot. You have every right to grieve and to still think about him. When you’re ready, you’ll be able to remember him without it hurting so much. The sadness won’t just disappear, but it’ll change. You’ll find a way to carry it differently.”
I don’t know what I did to deserve a friend like Mindy, but I’m so grateful for everything she’s done for me and Riley.
I wipe the tears from my cheeks and take a deep breath.
I haven’t been myself lately.
All my energy has gone into Riley, making sure she doesn’t feel the weight of her dad’s absence too heavily. She knows he’s up in heaven watching over us, but I can see how much she misses him. Just like I do.
We visit his grave as much as possible, usually when my shifts don’t get in the way.
She always brings drawings—pictures of our day, little moments, and butterflies as she’s a believer that he sends butterflies to us—carefully placing them on the headstone with a few stones to stop the wind from carrying them away.
We used to have these perfect simple family nights.
The kind of nights that didn’t require anything other than each other’s company.
Game nights that would turn into competitive chaos, movie nights where we’d fight over the remote, and during the winter, when it would pour, we’d run out into the garden like kids, splashing in puddles until we were drenched and laughing like there was no tomorrow.
And when it snowed, we’d make the most ridiculous snowmen and throw snowballs, no care in the world.
Even now, those moments are still with us, though it’s different. We still try to gather, to have those moments when we visit his grave. We sit there, have a picnic, and just talk. We laugh about the silly things he used to do, the little quirks that made him, him.
It’s bittersweet, because for a moment, it feels like he’s still here with us.
I turn to Mindy, my heart full. “You’re honestly such an incredible friend, Min,” I say softly, pulling her into a hug. “I hope you know how much you mean to me.”
She pulls me in tighter, her arms wrapping around me like she’s never letting go. “Come on, you’re stuck with me. Sisters, remember?” She pulls back slightly, tilting her head with a playful smile, and I can’t help but smile back.
I wipe my tears, then grab her hand.
“What are you doing, Viv?” Mindy asks.
“We’re going back in and I’m going to dance, because if there’s one thing Trev would’ve been furious about, it would be me giving up those dance moves he fell in love with.”
He used to pretend he hated dancing. Said it wasn’t his thing, that he only did it for me. But the second a good beat hit, especially something old and gritty that made my hips move, he was right there, eyes locked on me like he couldn’t look away.
She practically screeches, jumping up and down. “That’s my girl!”
And just like that, we head back in.
Greg and Miles head toward us, both of them wearing that same worried look.
“Is everything okay, Viv?” Greg asks, his voice gentle.
I nod and tuck my hair behind my ear. “Yeah, I’m okay. Just needed a minute,” I say. My words are honest, but I can feel they’re not the full truth. “Thanks for asking.”
Still, my attention shifts to Miles.
He looks like he wants to say something. His mouth opens slightly…then shuts again. Whatever it is, he keeps it to himself.
Min doesn’t let the silence hang. She links her arm through mine and gives me a playful shake. “So, are we dancing again or what?”
I glance at her and grin. “Obviously. I know how badly you want to get in on that line dancing.”
She laughs because it’s true, she’s never skipped a chance to line dance. Not once. Not since we were teenagers. And she’s good at it too, like really good. The kind that has every guy in the room watching her and trying to keep up.
I shoot a glance at Greg and catch the way he’s looking at her, soft smile and all. Yep. She’s giving him all the signals tonight.
Normally, I’m super protective of her when it comes to guys.
Her exes are walking red flags.
But Greg? Greg’s different. He’s genuinely kind, thoughtful, and just solid. One of the sweetest people I know—underneath all that rugged, serious cowboy look of his, of course. So, for once, I’m stepping back and letting her have this.
“Well then,” Min says, flashing a cheeky grin. “If you boys will excuse us…” She nods toward the dance floor, where a crowd is already lining up in neat rows, ready to go.
We head that way, the beat already pulsing through the speakers.
I feel a stare on me before I even look…then, yep, there it is.
Hazel eyes. A smirk. Miles.
I quickly look away, focusing on the rhythm, on the steps, on anything but him.
* * *
We finish the line dance, both breathless and laughing. It’s clear who nailed every step and who…well, kept up, barely.
Okay, fine. I still have the moves, but my stamina? Not what it used to be. My legs are burning and I’m pretty sure my lungs are about to explode.
I pull my hair up into a ponytail, trying to cool down. The room’s gotten hotter, or maybe it’s just me, but either way I’m sweating like I ran a marathon instead of dancing for three and a half minutes.
“Didn’t know you could dance like that,” a deep, smooth voice says in my ear.
I turn around a little too quickly and knock the beer right out of Miles’s hand, splashing it all over his shirt.
“Oh my god!” I gasp, hand flying to my mouth. “I’m so sorry, Miles!”
The cold drink runs down the front of his shirt, making the fabric cling to his chest, and that’s when I notice the very clear outline of a toned torso.
I glance away instantly.
It’s not like I meant to see, it was right there…but even that accidental glimpse makes something twist in my chest.
Miles tips his head back, sighing with his tongue pressed to his top lip, like he’s trying not to laugh.
“Miles?” I ask, flustered now. “Are you okay? I swear it was an accident.”
He finally looks at me and smirks. “It’s just beer, don’t worry,” he reassures me.
I let out a breathy, awkward laugh. “Still, let me help. I think there’s a dryer in the bathroom or something, I can dry your shirt really quick.”
His brow lifts. “Are you offering to strip me down in a bar, Viv?”
My jaw drops, my cheeks heating up. “What? No! I mean, I’ll take your shirt—just the shirt—and dry it.”
He laughs then. A warm, easy sound that almost makes me forget I’m still mortified.
“Relax. I’m kidding,” he says, stepping aside. “Lead the way.”
Cheeks still burning, I turn to head for the hallway, only to spot Mindy. She’s practically glued to Greg, arms wrapped around his neck.
Wearing his cowboy hat.
Of course she is.
We all know the rule.
You wear the hat, you ride the cowboy.
Miles follows my gaze and lets out a low laugh. “Looks like those two have a long night ahead of them.”
I laugh too, shaking my head. “He has no idea what he’s in for.”