Chapter Twenty-Two
My body sings with fire as I slowly come awake. I feel like I’m floating in warm honey, my body on sensory overload, and yet there is comfort there, too. I peel my eyes open, the television screen frozen on the movie menu, throwing out more than enough light to illuminate the room.
I blink when I see Shepard still in front of me, asleep in the chair, his face softer.
I bite back a moan when hands cup my breasts, tweaking my nipples through my tank top. I turn my head, and as I expected, I find Riggs behind me with that glazed expression.
Fuck. We all fell asleep. I look over at Shepard and swallow, glad he’s out cold. I need to figure out a way to slip free without disturbing anyone.
Before I can come up with anything, Riggs’s hands slide up my ribs, dragging my tank top up and pulling it over my head. In the next breath, he has my bra off, and his rough palms cover my bare breasts. The feeling is exquisite without any material between us.
I lean my head back against his shoulder, giving him free rein, and losing myself for a moment.
Each pull and tug of my nipples causes my pussy to spasm, and I swear I could come from this alone.
Before I get to test that theory, Riggs abruptly stops and gets to his feet.
I think that’s it, until he starts stripping out of his clothes.
My mouth drops open as I take in all his naked glory.
Asleep or awake, apparently, a man can sense when an opening is available because my open mouth acts as a beacon to Riggs’s cock.
He steps closer, his hand moving to my hair to hold me in place as he holds his cock to my lips.
I could scream. I could call Shepard’s name, and he’d help me. But curiosity wins me over.
I flick the tip of his cock with my tongue, tasting the salty bead of pre-cum as he holds my head steady and feeds me his cock.
I groan around him, feeling far more turned on than I thought I would.
I resist touching myself, not wanting to lose focus, needing to savor every moment of this in case it’s the last. Every time we come together like this, he’s been asleep.
And every time I let him continue, I push us further down a dark path that might condemn us both.
And yet here I am, my hands sliding around the back of his thighs as he slowly fucks my mouth.
He’s gentle with me. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t that. Perhaps one day I’d like to explore an option where he’s not so careful with me, but right now, this feels like I’m giving a blow job with training wheels. And I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m okay with that.
His being unaware of mistakes I might make keeps my nerves even.
I let myself go, relishing the act, feeling powerful and sexy.
I won’t lie, there’s a moment when it becomes less about Riggs and more about me.
About taking back something that was taken.
I feel it return home, my blood crackling with power that I keep banished.
I let the tears of relief flow free. In the stillness of the room, with my lips wrapped around Riggs’s cock, I learn to forgive myself a little.
That’s the thing about trauma—all that anger and hate and blame that pours out, doesn’t just drench the villain.
It soaks the victim too, leaving behind a residue that sinks beneath the skin, like a dark layer of filth that can never be washed away.
It takes a long time for the brain to realize that there was never anything to wash away in the first place.
After years of feeling dirty, I find it hilarious—it’s with a dick in my mouth that I suddenly feel clean.
When he pulls back, I look up at him, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand.
He stands there for a moment, lost in his head, until he reaches for me and maneuvers us until I’m sitting on his lap, my back pressed to his chest. One hand cups my breast as the other delves into my shorts, slipping beneath my panties, where he finds me wet and aching.
“Fuck!” I jolt at the rough voice, my eyes snapping to Shepard. He’s wide awake now, his gaze running over my half-naked body. I whimper in embarrassment and need as his eyes finally lock on mine.
“You trying to make me jealous, man? ’Cuz if you are, it’s fucking working,” Shepard snarls at Riggs. But of course, Riggs doesn’t answer. Instead, he practically rips my shorts and underwear from my body, leaving me naked before he spreads my legs wide, exposing me completely to Shepard.
“You’re such a fucking prick!” Shepard snaps at him.
I shake my head. “He’s asleep, Shepard. He doesn’t know what he’s doing.”
Shepard freezes before his eyes move from my wet pussy to my face. If he’s looking for the truth, he finds it in my shame and arousal. “You want me to make him stop?” His voice is rough as he gets to his feet, but my eyes are locked on the erection threatening to burst out of his jeans.
Riggs’s fingers are stroking my clit like he knows all the chords to my favorite song. If he stops, I think I might die.
“No. I don’t want him to stop. I need to come.”
I can feel Riggs’s hard dick, sandwiched between us, making me squirm as I force myself to look into Shepard’s eyes. I don’t know if I was expecting to see disappointment or disgust, but his expression shows neither. All I see is naked lust, which has my heart racing faster.
“Can…can I taste you?” I whisper.
His head falls back with a moan before he tears open his jeans and pulls his cock free. “You’re sure?” he asks as he moves closer.
I nod. I feel like a swirling mass of confusion, to be fair, but I still want to taste him. He can be my emotional support cock for the night.
Sliding his hand into my hair, he tips my head as he moves his cock to my lips. I open wide for him and take him in. He’s shorter than Riggs, but maybe a touch thicker. I won’t be able to keep this up for long without making my jaw ache.
“Fuck, you feel good, Poppy,” Shepard growls, tightening his grip, making fire dance across my skull.
It makes me hungrier for him. I suck him harder as Riggs slips two fingers inside me and crooks them, stroking against a spot inside me that has my legs jittering and my brain threatening to stroke out.
Holding my head steady, now with both hands, Shepard takes over.
He fucks my mouth slowly at first before he picks up speed, going a little harder and deeper each time, until I gag.
He pulls himself free for a moment, giving me a chance to catch my breath as he watches Riggs’s drenched fingers fuck me.
“What are you doing to me, woman?” he hisses before his hands are back in my hair and his cock is back in my mouth.
I lose myself in the sensations, giving myself over to them, hoping these men will catch me when I fall. And as I climb higher and higher, I know the fall will be catastrophic.
“Fuck, I can’t hold on any longer.”
I suck harder, wanting to taste him, needing to know what all the fuss is about.
“Fuck. You’re gonna drink my cum like a good girl, aren’t you, baby? Anyone who kisses you will taste me on their lips.”
His twisted words are my undoing. I come hard, squeezing the life out of Riggs’s fingers as Shepard throws his head back and curses my name. He erupts down my throat, and I swallow reflectively, making him curse me all over again. I’d grin, you know, if I didn’t have a cock in my mouth.
I feel Riggs stroking himself now behind me, using his hand that’s wet from my juices, the rapid movements jolting me as I moan.
Shepard pulls free as I lick my lips. He moves back, collapsing in the chair with his cock still out, looking slightly dazed.
Before I can catch my bearings, Riggs is maneuvering me once more, this time to my knees so he can stand over me. I close my eyes and open my mouth when he holds his cock in front of me. But he doesn’t slip it inside. Instead, he strokes himself to completion, shooting his cum over my face.
“Holy fuck, I’m doing that next time,” Shepard growls as Riggs finishes and collapses on the sofa.
It takes less than a second for the embarrassment to kick in.
I reach for my top and wipe my face with it before slipping Riggs’s T-shirt over my head.
I turn to Shepard but avoid looking at his face.
“Can you get Riggs back to the ranch house? I need to take a shower.” I hand Riggs his jeans. “Get dressed, Riggs.”
He takes them from me, somewhat robotically, as I get to my feet.
“Poppy—”
“I just need to get showered and crash. It’s been a long day.” I hesitate before I turn back to look at him. “Don’t say anything to him, okay? I’m gonna talk to him. I just need to figure out what to say.”
And then, before Shepard can pass judgment, I hurry up to my room like the coward I am.