Chapter 13
Chapter Thirteen
C asey had conflicting feelings about Noelle coming to help. Part of him was thrilled to have a clean house, his laundry washed, and dinner ready when he got home after a hard day of ranching. The other part was struggling to deal with having a woman he lusted after so close at hand.
Just one whiff of Noelle’s bakery scent made him lightheaded and breathless. One glance from her evergreen eyes had him stuttering like a fool. And if she touched him, he was toast.
Petrified toast.
He’d jacked off so much in the last three days that he worried he’d done permanent damage. The worst part about it was it hadn’t helped. She’d cast some weird spell on him that made him constantly horny but unable to find satisfaction.
“Casey?”
He pulled from his thoughts and realized everyone at the dinner table was looking at him. Especially Noelle who had just spoken his name.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “What did you say?”
“I asked if you wanted more pecan pie.”
Why did the word “pie” coming from her pouty red lips sound so sexual? All he could think about was diving into her warm, sweet—
“No!” He spoke the word so loudly that everyone at the table startled. He lowered his voice. “I mean, no, thank you. No pie for me.” No pie. No muffin. No sweets from Noelle period.
Cloe stood. “Well, if everyone is finished with dinner, I think we should go in and finish decorating the tree before . . .” She let the sentence drift off, but everyone knew what she wanted to say. Before Hellion Autumn Grace wakes up. Casey adored his niece, but there was no denying she was a pistol. A screaming pistol who could wake the dead with her crying fits.
Casey got up and started collecting the dinner plates. “I’ll do the dishes and let y’all start decorating.” The less time he hung around Noelle, the better. Unfortunately, Sam seemed to like throwing him and Noelle together. No doubt because he wanted Casey to cave and confess that he’d lied about their relationship.
“No, I’ll do the dishes.” Sam got up from his chair. “You should spend time with your girlfriend.”
Casey pinned on a smile. “Thanks, Sam. Nothin’ I like better than being around Ellie.”
The tree Cloe had ordered was at least twelve feet tall with full branches that took up the entire corner of the room. Which explained why it took Rome and Casey teetering on two stepladders with twelve strings of twinkle lights to cover it.
Once they’d plugged in the lights, Casey had to admit that the effort was worth it. Not only because the tree looked like an explosion of stars, but also because of the stars it put in the Holiday sisters’ eyes. They stood in front of the tree with their arms hooked around each other and their faces lit with sheer joy.
Rome glanced over at Casey and grinned from ear to ear. Casey knew how he felt. He couldn’t help the satisfied feeling that settled in his stomach. That feeling only grew as he watched the sisters gleefully start hanging the ornaments, exclaiming over every one. Including the box of ornaments Rome had taken down from the attic.
“Oh, my gosh!” Noelle held up the cotton ball snowman Casey had made in first grade. “I remember making these.” Her gaze snapped to Casey. “I also remember a certain someone wiping his gluey hands in my hair.” A comment like that was usually accompanied with a condemning scowl. So he was surprised when she flashed him a smile and a wink. “You were so ornery, Casey Remington.” Thankfully, she turned back to the tree to hang the ornament before she could notice his reaction to that smile. His body flamed like the fire crackling in the fireplace.
“Look at this one.” Cloe lifted a fragile-looking angel ornament from the tissue paper it had been wrapped in. She carefully wound the music box handle sticking out beneath one satin wing and the tinkling sound of “Angels We Have Heard on High” filled the room.
Casey didn’t have memories of his mama growing up, but this song had always struck a chord in him. Maybe because music embedded deeper in your psyche than visual memories. Or maybe because Rome had told him how much their mama had loved the song and sang it every Christmas. Whatever the reason, every time he heard it, it made him feel things he didn’t want to feel.
He climbed down from the stepladder and set down the string of fake cranberries he’d been about to loop around the tree. “I think I better go check on Junie and Johnny.”
Once outside, he took deep breaths of the chilly night air before he headed toward the barn. As always, Junie and Johnny were thrilled to see him. He sat down in the pile of straw in their stall and let them cover his face in sloppy kisses.
“Okay, okay, I love you too.”
He grabbed a ball and threw it into the corner. They stopped showering him with attention and tumbled over each other to retrieve it. He continued to play ball with them until Junie’s ears perked up and she bounded to the half-stall door and started barking. Johnny joined in on the barking. A second later, Noelle appeared.
She wore a coat and a red-and-green knit hat pulled low, only a few strands of dark hair peeking out. Her cheeks and nose were red from the cold, but he’d noticed at dinner that she hadn’t painted her lips red today. They weren’t painted at all. He didn’t know what he liked better—the glistening cherry red or this soft natural rose.
“Well, hello, you two sweethearts.” She opened the stall door and stepped in. As soon as she sat down on the bale of hay, the puppies were all over her. She giggled with delight as they danced around her legs and jumped up to give her wet licks. After they had settled down, she looked at Casey. “I see they still have plenty of energy.”
“Too much.” Casey grabbed the ball and tossed it into the corner. Both puppies scrambled after it. Soon the two were wrestling around in the hay for possession of the ball. Both Casey and Noelle laughed. When they sobered, Noelle’s gaze drifted to him.
“Rome told us about the angel being your mama’s. You okay?”
“I’m fine. I just needed to check on these two.”
She nodded and looked at the puppies playing. “Do you keep in touch with her?”
He really didn’t want to have this conversation, but he couldn’t see how to get out of it without Noelle thinking it bothered him. “We talk occasionally.”
“That’s good. I mean . . . she’s your mama.”
“Not really.” The words just popped out. He wanted them back, but it was too late. When Noelle glanced at him in question, he shrugged. “She wasn’t here for me, and the few times a year we talk, I get the feeling that it just makes her feel guilty. So I don’t push a relationship.”
“I’m sorry.” The compassion in her voice brought a lump to his throat that was hard to talk around.
“It’s not a big deal.”
“Yes, it is. It’s a very big deal to have a parent who doesn’t know how to show their love. My daddy has always struggled to show us girls how much we mean to him. Luckily, we have Mama and Mimi and each other to make up the difference. You just had Rome and your daddy. And I get the feeling that Sam is a lot like Hank.”
“Gruff and unbendable?”
She laughed. “That’s putting it mildly.” Junie came back over for attention and she stroked the puppy’s ears. “What I’m saying is that it’s okay to be upset, Casey. It’s okay to be sad that she left and angry that she still doesn’t know how to be a mama. You don’t have to smile all the time.”
“I don’t smile all the time.”
She sent him a skeptical look. “Okay, then ninety-nine percent of the time. Your smug smile used to make me so mad I could spit. The more I tried to get back at you for all your teasing and pranks, the more you smiled. I thought you were like my sisters and only thought of me as a cute little nuisance whose sole value was to amuse you.”
Her honesty took him by surprise and maybe that’s what had him being just as honest. “I never thought of you as a nuisance. I liked making you mad, but only because I wanted your attention.” He hadn’t meant to be that honest. Her eyes widened with disbelief and he quickly tried to salvage his dignity. “I mean I was a greedy boy who loved having all the girls’ attention.” He grabbed the ball and tossed it again, hoping her attention would move to the two puppies tumbling head over tails as they scrambled to get it.
It didn’t.
“Casey.”
Just the breathy way she said his name made him burn. He tried to keep his eyes on the puppies, but it was impossible when she slipped off the bale of hay and moved toward him on her knees. With her on her knees and him sitting, they were eye level. So that left nowhere to look but into her meadow-green eyes. They had looked at him in a lot of different ways—mostly annoyance and anger. Now, they held a softness that drew him in like the warm glow of lit windows on a frigid night.
She lifted a hand and cradled his jaw in the warmth of her palm. “Well, you have my attention now, Casey Remington.” She leaned in and brushed her lips over his.
The kiss was nothing like the kiss they had shared in the kitchen at Nothin’ But Muffins. This kiss was feather soft . . . and undemanding. Maybe that was what made it so powerful. Women had always had high expectations of Casey’s sexual abilities. But Noelle’s kiss held no expectations. Made no demands. It was just a gift freely given. After giving it, she drew back and smiled as if it had been everything she’d wanted.
“I think I like having your attention too, Case.”
Those ruby-red nails slid through his hair, drawing him back to her rose-colored lips. This time, they parted and welcomed him into the heat of her mouth. He groaned low in his throat and came to his knees to get closer to the full-figured body that had been keeping him up at night. It welcomed him as much as her mouth, her arms hooking over his shoulders as she pressed all those sweet curves against him.
A flood of desire snapped his control and he took over the kiss, bending her back over the arm he had wrapped possessively around her waist as he hungrily fed on her mouth. He wanted to eat her whole and might have done so if two furry puppies hadn’t wiggled their way between them, causing Noelle to giggle against his lips before he drew back. Her lips were puffy and wet from the kiss and her eyes twinkled.
“I’m really starting to think your dogs don’t want us kissing.”
Casey sighed as he tried to control Johnny and Junie who just wanted in on the new game. “I’m starting to think the same thing.” He glanced at her. “And maybe that’s a good thing.”
The hurt look was easy to read in those green eyes. She stood and brushed the hay off her butt. “I guess I’m not as experienced at kissing as you’re used to.”
He quickly got to his feet. “It’s not that at all, Ellie. It’s just that I . . . well, I thought this was all fake.” And what just happened hadn’t felt fake. Not fake at all.
She hesitated before she completely blindsided him. “Maybe it doesn’t have to be.”
He stared at her, thinking he’d misunderstood. “What?”
“Maybe we could have a relationship . . . a physical relationship.” When he was too stunned to speak, she elaborated. “Sex.”
There was a long awkward moment before he released his breath in a huffy laugh. “You really had me going there, Ellie.” When she didn’t laugh, he sobered. “You’re serious?”
Her cheeks flushed and she lowered her gaze. “I guess it is a foolish idea. I just thought you were feeling what I’ve been feeling. But obviously that’s not the case.” Her shoulders lifted in a weak shrug. “And why would you? Kenny proved that I’m not the type of woman men desire.” She turned and headed out of the stall. “I better go help Cloe and Rome finish decorating the tree.”
He stood there for only a second before he secured the puppies in the stall and chased after her. He caught up with her on the porch and took her arm, pulling her around to face him. The massive light display made the tears in her eyes look like a thousand colorful gems.
Gems that cut straight through his heart.
“You’re wrong, Ellie. I don’t know what Kenny’s problem was, but it had nothing to do with you not being sexy. You’re the sexiest woman I’ve met in my life.”
She pulled away from him and shook her head. “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
“No, I’m not.” He took her hand and placed it on the bulge in the front of his jeans. Just the feel of her hand had his semi turning full.
Her eyes widened and a puff of air came through her parted lips. “Oh.”
Before he embarrassed himself, he removed her hand. “So sexual desire is not the reason I don’t want to get involved in a physical relationship with you. I just think it would blur the lines of our fake relationship.”
“But why? I mean if we both agreed that it would just be sex, then I don’t see the problem. You have sex all the time and it doesn’t mean anything.”
He sighed. “But you don’t.”
Her eyes widened. “This is about me being a virgin? Because if it is, I’m not. Kenny took my blossom and then pretty much told me it wasn’t worth the effort I’d taken to save it.”
Casey was not a violent man, but he had the strong desire to hunt Kenny down and beat him senseless. “He sounds like an asshole who was trying to compensate for his own sexual insecurities.”
“But don’t you see? Whether it was Kenny’s inexperience or mine, I don’t want my next sexual experience to end up being another embarrassing failure. And if anyone can help me become experienced, it’s you, Case.”
Just the thought of helping Noelle become experienced had at least a thousand fantasies vying for a place in his head. Thankfully, his logic overruled them. She might say she wouldn’t get attached, but he couldn’t trust the word of a woman who had dressed up as a bride for Halloween all through grade school.
“I’m sorry, Ellie, but that is a resounding—”
A high-pitched wail came from the house and cut him off.
“Autumn Grace is up.” Noelle turned to the door, but stopped before she reached it and glanced back at him. “Just think about it, Case. That’s all I’m asking. Think about it.”
As he watched her disappear into the house, Casey knew that’s all he’d think about.