Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
Tom died on his way to the hospital. He bled out. Jenny Lynn is sitting in a cell and charged with kidnapping. I thought she was so nice. Part of me had thought Justice had made up that story about them as a way to get me to do what he wanted.
We never truly know anyone, I guess. They were strangers, but they knew things about me.
Thad said that they had been following me for weeks.
Jenny Lynn confessed to it all. She said they just wanted to scare me and force me to give back the money her husband spent watching my videos.
Either way, they didn’t have good intentions.
Because Tom fired at Justice, they let him go, citing it was self-defense.
I’m grateful he was there and that he saved my life, but nothing has changed. I can’t be with him.
I know he doesn’t love Tawny, but I know him.
He’s going to want to do the right thing and be there for his kid.
He never had a true father growing up. Well, besides mine.
I don’t want to ruin that relationship either.
He’s in my father’s club, and I’d never want to get in the way of that.
Not to mention he’s my brother’s best friend.
Storm would kill him if he knew that he’d slept with me.
There’s too much between us. A million reasons why we could never work, and yet there’s a part of me that burns hotter than ever for him.
I miss him so much, but I refuse to see him. Because if I do, I’ll give in. I’ll let him sweet-talk me into something that will only cause us both more pain.
I’ve been locked away in my old bedroom. Everyone has been giving me space considering I was nearly kidnapped at gunpoint.
But it’s Christmas Eve, and I promised my old man I’d cook dinner for him and Storm tomorrow, and I need to get busy prepping for it. And I guess he’s invited this Greylan chick. The woman who inherited the farm down the road from us.
Then there’s Justice. He usually eats here on the holidays because for years he’s been part of our family. This year he’s probably with Tawny. The idea of it makes me sick to my stomach.
He should be here with me. We should be about to tell my father and my brother that we’re together.
I shake those thoughts away and crawl out of bed even though it’s the last thing I want to do.
The house is quiet. No one will be here until later. The guys are doing their annual Christmas party at the clubhouse.
I go through the motions of getting dressed and turning on some Christmas music, but I’m anything but festive.
This may be my worst Christmas yet other than the year we lost my mother.
The one thing I’ve always wished for I can no longer have.
Christmas can suck a dick.
In the kitchen, I flick on the lights and turn on the coffee pot, though I wish I had something stronger to get me through the next few days. I’m going back after Christmas Day. I can’t stay here a second longer. I can’t chance seeing Justice or, worse, seeing him with Tawny.
I heard my dad talking to my brother about a business deal with Tawny’s father that depends on Justice marrying her.
Even if I wanted to be with him, there’s no way it could work.
Like he said. I don’t want to be his secret, and he doesn’t want to be my regret. And that’s exactly where the road leads. A big, fat, fucking dead end without him. Why put myself through more pain?
We had one night, and that’s all we will ever be.
I have to make my peace with that.
I pour myself a coffee and go into the living room to plug in the tree. I sit by the fireplace and stare out the window, wondering if he’s over at his cabin.
It doesn’t matter.
I dig around in my bag for my birth control pills and find that stupid present I bought him or that he bought for himself.
I take the Santa on a motorcycle snow globe out of my purse and leave it on the coffee table.
I want to smash it into a million pieces, but for some stupid reason, I grab my coat and slip my boots on.
Before I know what I’m doing, I’m across the field and knocking on his door.
He opens it immediately. “Bean?” His eyes widen at the sight of me.
“Here.” I thrust the novelty gift at his chest.
He smiles.
“Wipe that smile off your face. This doesn’t change anything.”
He puts the snow globe on a nearby table. “Can we talk?”
“No.” I shake my head. “I’ve got to get back.”
“Five minutes, Neva. You can give me that, can’t you?”
God looking at his stupid jerk face pisses me off. “Oh my God, what happened to your face?” I go to touch the puffy bruise around his eye.
“Give me five minutes.”
“Fine. Five minutes. Not a second more.”
I kick my boots off and shrug my jacket off to lie across the back of his couch while he shuts the door behind me.
I drop down onto the cushions and fold my arms across my chest. “Start talking.”
“I told your father no. About the deal. Told him he’d have to find another way to get what he wanted. That he could kick me from the club, but I’m not going to marry Tawny. I don’t love her, and nothing is going to change that. I love you, and I told him that, too.”
“You what?”
“I told Devil that I’m in love with you, Bean.”
“Did he hit you?”
“No. That was Storm.”
“I’m going to kick his ass. He has no right.”
“It wasn’t just about you. We’ve got some issues to work out.”
“Let me guess. Club business.”
“Yup.” He pulls my arms apart. “Fuck, baby. I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too, but this doesn’t change the fact that Tawny is having your kid.”
“It’s not mine. The baby. Tawny confessed she slept with your brother.”
“Oh.” I make a disgusted face.
“We can be together, Neva.”
He pulls me to his side.
“Wait. Why aren’t you at the clubhouse for the party?”
“Because I’m out. I chose you, Neva.”
“Does my father know this?”
“Not yet.”
“You can’t quit the club for me. Devil will come around.”
“I love you, Bean.” He kisses me hard, deep, and wet with lots of tongue.
I pull back. “So you know for sure that Tawny’s baby isn’t yours?”
“Not until we can do a DNA test, but Storm’s agreed to marry her.”
“What? Why?”
“To make your father proud of him for once. You know how he is.”
I guess I do. Storm loves Justice like a brother, but he gets jealous of how much attention he gets from our father. Storm fucks up a lot, so I can see it.
“Hmm.”
“Hmm, what?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. I’m processing.”
“Can you process naked in my bed, because all I want for Christmas is you.”
“Maybe.” I grin, and he pulls me in for another kiss.
“Good, because I’m cuffing you to my bed.” He places one of the black furry cuffs around my wrist. “And while we’re at it. We can play with these.”
He bought those stupid dice.
“Merry Christmas, Bean.”
His lips meet mine, and then I lose all my clothes and my heart to Justice ‘Ice’ Delgado.