Chapter 21
Nisha
Standing outside Suman’s apartment, I stare at the locked door, trying to figure out how the hell to get inside.
She used to live here alone as her parents were in Kerala.
And ever since her death, the landlord hasn’t been able to find a new tenant.
That’s the only reason I still have a chance to search this place, to see if there’s anything she might’ve left behind that could give me a clue about what she really found out about Prakash.
I know Sidharth and the police have already done their routine checks and found nothing, but I can’t just sit back. I need to check for myself. Not when that message on my wall clearly said Suman knew something. That alone is reason enough to bring me here.
Maybe it’s foolish, maybe I won’t find anything that they might have missed. But there’s this small, stubborn flicker of hope inside me that maybe this place still holds the truth she never got the chance to tell me.
“I think it’s a bad idea,” Karan says from beside me.
I glance at him, taking in the way his brows are drawn together, his jaw clenched tight.
His usually sharp, guarded eyes sweep over the hallway with practiced precision.
His discouraging words, the same ones he’s been repeating since we got here, make me frown.
But I don’t comment on them. Instead, I let my eyes roam over him.
Dressed in plain black clothes, an earpiece tucked discreetly in his ear, broad-shouldered and alert with an imposing build, he fits the role of a bodyguard to a T.
“I think we should at least inform Sidharth sir about this,” he adds.
Ignoring his suggestion, I ask, “Do you know how to break a lock?”
He stares at me with a look that silently questions my sanity, but he doesn’t say it out loud. He draws in a deep breath and says, “Ma’am, I think you didn’t hear me. I said Sidharth sir needs to know we’re here. He won’t be happy if he finds out I brought you here without informing him.”
I know Sidharth won’t be happy, and he wouldn’t want me here. That’s exactly why I didn’t tell him.
“Then let him be mad. But I’m not leaving this place, not when there’s even the slightest chance I might find something here.”
“But ma’am—” he begins, but I cut him off.
“You promised you’d help me. So keep your word,” I bite back.
“Not one of my finest decisions,” Karan mutters under his breath, and I can’t help but let out a small giggle. He immediately turns to glare at me.
Earlier, when I told him I needed to go to Suman’s apartment, he had flat-out refused.
Said it was unnecessary. But I wasn’t backing down.
I reminded him about the message, about how Suman might’ve known something, and that this could be our only chance to find a clue.
Eventually, after way too much arguing and a few well-aimed guilt trips, he finally agreed, albeit reluctantly.
Asking the landlord for the key was out of the question. He would’ve informed the police instantly, and Sidharth would’ve found out in no time. And I wasn’t ready for that.
Putting on my most serious face, I look at Karan. “Open the door. Please.”
He sighs. “Ma’am, I’m a bodyguard. Not a lock breaker.”
I arch a brow. “Aww, don’t sell yourself short. You’re more than just solid muscle. Pretty damn smart, too, to get us inside.”
He frowns. “The smartest way would be to call Sidharth sir and ask him to arrange the key.”
Jerk.
I shake my head stubbornly. “We are not telling him. Or anyone.”
Not bothering to argue this time, he steps forward and begins working on the lock. I cross my fingers, my heart racing, watching his hands move with surprising skill. After a few attempts, the door finally creaks open.
I glance at the now-unlocked door, then at Karan, unable to hide the satisfied grin spreading across my face.
“See, I told you, nothing is impossible for you. And for the record, this would’ve been much faster if you hadn’t wasted so much time arguing.”
“Yeah, forgive me for trying not to commit a crime.” He lets out a low, sarcastic huff. “I still think this is a really bad idea.”
Taking a deep breath, I say nothing and simply step past the threshold.
A rush of adrenaline surges through me as I glance around the dark, silent space.
Karan follows close behind, then steps to the side and flips the switch on the wall. Faint yellow lights flicker to life overhead, casting an eerie glow across the small apartment.
My pulse hammers as memories of all the times I spent here flood my mind.
But I push back the ache in my chest and force myself to focus, letting my gaze wander around the living room.
The brown furniture, coated in a faint layer of dust, is still neatly arranged with everything else perfectly in place.
A tingling unease creeps across my skin as I move further in. Karan stays close behind, silent, but the tension in his posture makes his discomfort impossible to miss.
And when we step into Suman’s bedroom, my chest tightens.
Her bed is neatly made, just the way she always liked it before leaving home.
The baby pink curtains are drawn halfway, the very ones we picked out together during one of my impulsive shopping sprees.
A half-burnt lavender candle still sits on the bedside table…
the scent she loved so much and I always complained about.
Everything looks exactly as I remember, and yet somehow, it doesn’t.
Reminding myself once again that this isn’t the time to drown in sadness, I force my focus back to why I’m here. I start searching, methodically opening drawers, flipping through books, lifting picture frames, and even shaking out the pages of old diaries. But I find nothing.
Karan leans against the wall with his arms crossed, watching me. He doesn’t say a word, but I know exactly what he’s thinking. That this is pointless, that I won’t find anything. I let out a tired huff, and for a moment, I almost believe he’s right.
I’m just about to say we should leave when my breath catches, and my eyes land on the handbag resting on the chair by her dressing table.
On autopilot, I walk across the room and carefully pick it up, my fingers running over the soft beige leather.
My heart clenches. I gave this to her on her birthday three years ago.
She had hugged me tight, saying it was her favorite gift and that she’d carry it everywhere.
And now, it’s just sitting here, left behind.
My throat tightens as I clutch it to my chest. Somehow, just holding it makes me feel like she’s close enough. In this aching moment, everything—breaking in, arguing with Karan, sneaking around in secret, suddenly feels worth it.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
The sharp edge of an angry voice slices through the silence, cutting straight through the tide of emotions crashing over me.
I freeze, my eyes snapping towards the doorway, to find Sidharth standing there.
Even from a few feet away, I can see the concern and fury etched all over his face.
And with the way his hands clench at his sides, there’s no mistaking the storm of frustration and worry burning in his eyes.
Seeing how scared he is for me makes my heart ache and swell all at once.
And in the next breath, I run straight into him, crashing against his chest with enough force to make him grunt in surprise.
But I don’t let go. I wrap my arms around his waist and bury my face in his shirt, as the dam finally breaks.
His hesitation lasts only a heartbeat before he pulls me tightly against him, holding me close, like he knows I need this more than anything right now. His one hand rests on the back of my head, the other tightens around my waist.
“You’re scaring me, sweetheart,” he whispers, his lips brushing the top of my head.
But I don’t answer. I can’t. My throat is too tight, my chest too full. All I can do is hold on tighter as fresh tears stream down my face, soaking into his shirt.
I don’t know how long we stand like that, until a throat clears behind us. Slowly, I lift my head as Karan speaks.
“I told ma’am this was a bad idea.”
Sidharth’s jaw tightens. “You and I will have a talk later.”
I quickly turn back to Sidharth and place a hand on his chest. His eyes meet mine, the hardness in them softening.
“It’s not his fault,” I say quietly. “I forced him to bring me here.”
Sidharth lets out a sigh, then leans down and presses a kiss to my forehead. “He still shouldn’t have brought you here.”
“Please don’t give him a hard time,” I whisper, my fingers tightening slightly on his shirt.
“That’s yet to be decided,” he mutters, before he shifts his gaze to Karan. “I’m taking Nisha. You lock up, then meet us there.”
Karan gives a silent nod, lifting his chin in agreement.
Without another word, Sidharth leads me out of the apartment, his hand steady on my back as we walk to his car. He opens the door and helps me into the passenger seat, then jogs around to the driver’s side. A moment later, he starts the engine and pulls out of the parking lot.
Twenty minutes into the drive, and neither of us has said a word. I keep staring out the window, watching the city lights blur past, while he stays focused on the road. His jaw is tight, his hands steady on the wheel. Finally, unable to take the silence any longer, I speak.
“I thought I was ready to walk into that house again. But the moment I stepped in, everything came rushing back—her laughter echoing down the hallway, the way she’d always hum while making coffee, that silly pink mug she refused to throw away even after it cracked.
It all felt too real, like time hadn’t moved at all.
” I fall silent as Sidharth’s hand settles over mine, steadying it on my lap.
“I know how much it’s messing with your head, sweetheart, and that’s why I didn’t want you to be there,” he says, and I draw in a shaky breath, trying to steady the ache before I continue.
“I miss her every damn day. And no matter how much I try to let go of the guilt, there’s this voice in my head that keeps whispering maybe it was my fault…
” I swallow hard, eyes glistening as I turn to look at him.
“I don’t even know if I miss her more… or hate myself for still being here when she’s not. ”
He lets out a sad huff and looks at me before turning to the road. “Nisha, she wouldn’t want you to drown in that guilt. She’d want you to remember her the way she lived, not the way she left.”
Unable to get my emotions in check, feeling weak and overwhelmed, I suddenly blurt out, “I don’t want to go home.”
“Where do you want to go?” he asks, glancing at me briefly before turning his eyes back to the road.
“Your place,” I whisper, summoning all the courage I’ve been holding in. I don’t know if it sounds too much, but right now, being with him is the only space where I don’t have to be strong, where I don’t have to pretend I’m okay, where it’s safe to just fall apart.
“You want to come to my place?” he asks as the car slows at a red light. He turns his head towards me, and the second our eyes meet, my heart starts to race. I nod, not trusting myself to speak.
“If that’s where you want to be, then that’s exactly where we’ll go,” he says, lifting my hand to his lips for a kiss before placing it on his thigh, covering it with his own and holding it there.
Then, without a word, he turns towards his house, his fingers never once leaving mine during the entire drive.
We reach his place not long after. He steps out and walks around to my side just as I unbuckle. When he opens the door and holds out his hand, I take it and slide out.
“Are you hungry?” he asks, lacing his fingers through mine as we walk up the steps to his porch.
“Starving,” I reply.
“Let’s fix that.” He smiles at me as he unlocks the door and pushes it open. We step inside and head straight to the living room. I sink into the couch, exhaustion settling into my bones.
“What are you in the mood to eat?” he asks, settling beside me.
“Burger, fries, and a Coke,” I say without hesitation.
He chuckles, kissing my forehead before pulling out his phone and placing the order. Once it’s done, he sets the phone down on the side table and turns to face me, his eyes a little more serious now.
“I hate to bring it up again, not when you’re already hurting, but sweetheart, I really didn’t like you going to Suman’s place. Especially not without telling me.”
I swallow hard, guilt tightening in my chest. “I know. I just…. I just thought maybe I’d find something. That message on my wall had my brain on overdrive. And I couldn’t just sit still, knowing there might be a piece left for me to find.”
He reaches out and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. “I get it. But if anything had happened to you…” His voice trails off. “Nisha, I can’t protect you if I don’t know where you are. That’s what scares me.”
My eyes sting, and I blink rapidly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to shut you out. I just… I didn’t want to take the chance of you stopping me. In that moment, all I could think about was what if I found something? What if it was the one thing that could finally put an end to all of this?”
“And you didn’t find anything,” he states as a matter of fact, his gaze steady.
“Nothing,” I admit defeatedly.
His expression softens, and he squeezes my hand in reassurance. “You’ll get your answers, Nisha. I promise.”
“I hope so,” I murmur, leaning my head against his shoulder.
He presses a kiss to my forehead, and we sit like that, the silence between us full of everything we don’t need to say, until the doorbell rings. I lift my head, and he smiles at me as he gets to his feet.
“Burger’s here. I’ll get it,” he says, walking towards the door.
I sit there, watching his back as he walks away, and a quiet truth settles over me. He’s not just here for me… he’s all in, completely. And that realisation seeps into my heart like a comforting warmth I didn’t know I’d been missing.