Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
Adelaide
My dad is waiting for me the second I get back to the house. I close my eyes and have the urge to drop my head to the steering wheel, but I don’t. No one gets the satisfaction of that reaction from me.
“Hey, Dad,” I say, grabbing the cake Zander got me, then slamming the car door with my hip. “What’s up?”
“Been waiting for you,” he says, standing from the bench at my front door.
“For five days?”
“Well, no.” He takes the cake from me. “What’s this? I’ve just been swinging by, hoping you’re in. I’ve wanted to talk.” He peers through the lid of the box, but it doesn’t clear any of his confusion. “What are you celebrating?”
“The ability to eat cake,” I say. “Do you want to come in? Willow’s not home.”
“I know. Otherwise, I would be waiting inside.”
“Did you lose your key? I’ve never changed the locks.” Though I might once I inevitably kick Willow out…whenever I build up the nerve.
I pull the key from my tote bag and unlock the door.
I cannot wait to finally change. There’s something sexy about only wearing Zander’s shirts for a few days, but I do love the collection of clothes I’ve created.
Dad hands me the cake once we’re inside and I make my way to the kitchen.
I stash it in the space I leave empty for cake and note Willow has rearranged my fridge in my absence.
“Come on,” I whisper to the universe. I pull out a container of strawberries and a can of whipped cream. “Do you want anything?”
“No, just wanted to see my little girl.”
I smile, then squirt whipped cream directly into my mouth. As much as I don’t want to have this conversation, I’m just glad he’s finally talking to me.
“Well, hi, I’m here. You okay?”
“I’m worried about you, sweetie.”
“I’m really really…not. Like, at all. I think I always have a base level of concern for my own chaos, but I’ve felt a little more regulated recently.”
Dad heaves a sigh and sits down at my kitchen table. He gestures for me to join him. Okay, so this is a sit-down conversation. Glad I have whipped cream.
I grab a bowl out of the cupboard and a handful of strawberries which I rinse in the sink, then plop them in.
I throw the rest back in the fridge and slowly make my way over to join my dad.
In many ways, he’s my mirror. He has the same freckles and eyes, the same chaos lying underneath the surface, the same nervous mannerisms. What I do not possess, however, is his ability to hold a grudge.
“Just go for it,” I say.
“Addie, come on, what I’m saying isn’t unreasonable.”
“What are you saying this time?” He levels me with a stare that I should be able to interpret after almost thirty years, but there’s something guarded in it. “Because I got all the texts and I got the silent treatment. I don’t know what you want me to say at this point.”
“I just don’t understand how you’re in a relationship with someone the town wants to ban.”
“And I don’t understand why the town wants to ban him.
What has he done in Beaver Creek that makes anyone think he would be a bad fit?
He’s been in town almost his entire life.
He’s had lunches and dinners at his grandmother’s house for the last ten years and nothing has happened.
The town didn’t implode. Why didn’t they do this to his parents who were actively and visibly harming him? Why now?”
“You have to recognize that he’s a dangerous—”
“I actually don’t have to recognize anything, especially things that aren’t true. Where’s the danger, Dad? In the last ten years he’s been in Beaver Creek, where has the danger been?”
“He seriously harmed someone, Addie.”
My brain feels like it’s going to explode. I run my fingers over my eyebrows. How many times can I have this conversation before I leave this town entirely? What happens if I can’t convince anyone of the good I see in Zander?
What if he’s right and it is useless?
I drown a strawberry in whipped cream and plop it into my mouth. I focus on chewing so I don’t start rage-crying. When I think I’m capable, I finally swallow.
“Okay, yeah, when he was nineteen, he got into a bar fight where he snapped after years of abuse and it ended terribly. But he did his penance for that. He feels awful about it, and I’ll give you that he should, but even the man he hurt managed to forgive him.
Do you expect him to just lie down and die because of something he did thirteen years ago? ”
“I know you may feel like this man has worked himself out, but these people do not change. If he was capable of violence once, he is capable of it again.”
“Then tell me why, of everyone I’ve dated, he is the man who has never hurt me.
He’s always listened to me, he’s never made me feel uncomfortable or like my consent would be ignored, he has never once raised his hand to me.
I refuse to let his past define him. You and the town would do well if you opened your minds. ”
“I get that you feel righteous about this, but I’m worried about you. We’re all worried about you.”
“That’s the whole issue, isn’t it? The town just doesn’t like outsiders, especially when they could one day hurt their precious, damaged golden child.”
He shakes his head, reaches out for my hands. I don’t let him have them. “Adelaide, please listen to me.”
“I’ve listened. I don’t think you’re listening to me.
Zander’s put in the work. He’s done time, community service, therapy.
He’s spent years unpacking how his parents treated him and how the system failed him.
He could be bitter and angry but look at what he’s done.
Look at the life he’s made for himself. Does that mean nothing? ”
“Not when it comes to my only daughter.”
“Your only daughter is telling you this is the first time she’s felt real love.
” The tears come, and I try to blink them away, but they slide down my cheeks.
“Dad, this is the first time I’ve felt like I deserve to be loved since Mom left.
Do you know how crazy that is? The guy whose parents didn’t even love him is showing me that I’m not some silly girl who is too much. ”
Dad looks down at the table. He stares at his clasped hands, every age spot and wrinkle. I lick my lips and taste the tart sweetness of the strawberries. I’m not sure I’ll ever eat strawberries again. His eyes are watery when his gaze returns to mine.
“I didn’t know you felt that way.”
“I have for years. I didn’t realize until Zander came into my life and loved me with no condition. I have a lot of really stupid hobbies and I say a lot of things without thinking…he loves that about me.”
“I love that about you too, Ads.” Dad blinks. The guarded look in his eyes slips away. The weight on my chest shifts. “I have to go. We’re not done with this, but I appreciate you saying this to me.”
“Of course, Dad,” I whisper.
I don’t get up when he does. He comes around the table and wraps his arms around my shoulders, kisses my forehead. He lets himself out. The tears fall in earnest. I want to believe I made a dent; that somehow my dad will suddenly understand this imperfect mess I chose.
I just don’t know.
Once I’ve cried myself out and stayed at the table in the same position for so long my body hurts, I spray whipped cream directly into my mouth. It doesn't make me feel better. My eyes burn and my nose aches.
I push away from the table and head upstairs to get changed. I cry in the shower. I sob in the shower. And then I pull myself together and decide I want all these stupid basic tiles gone.
I shove myself into an old pair of gym shorts and a ratty tank top. My hair gets thrown up into a messy bun. I have no makeup on and my eyes are red and puffy. I do not expect this to be the moment my doorbell rings. For a moment, I freeze, but ultimately decide I don’t care.
On the other side of my stained-glass door is Peggy Browning.
“Oh, God, hi.”
Peggy takes one good look at me and her charming grin—with teeth, that I somehow didn’t notice until now, slant inward the same as Zander’s—turns into a frown.
She barges into my house in the most polite, grandmotherly way I have ever witnessed.
She puts her bag on the floor, then ushers me by the upper arm to the back of the house.
“Come, come,” she says. “We’re going to the garden. Everything is better in the garden.”
I forgot, back when I first had tea at Peggy’s house, that she wanted to see my garden. She has one in her own backyard, just much smaller and limited to a bed in the back corner. She was eager to see my Gardens of Babylon, as she put it.
I breathe in deeply as we step outside. I close my eyes, let the wind wisp against my face.
“Did you know you have a hickey on your collarbone?” Peggy asks.
I let out a wet laugh. “Did you know this town wants to get rid of your grandson?”
“Unfortunately, yes, I am aware of that. Don’t you worry, though, I have a plan for the council meeting. Like hell they’ll ban my grandson.”
“I don’t know how they’ll do it, but I kind of believe we don’t have a chance.”
Peggy sighs. She walks further into my garden and inspects my fairy village. She wipes dirt away from a vibrant yellow door.
“You have to have hope, Adelaide. You’ve given me hope.”
“I have?”
“In more ways than one. You may not see it because you’re at the centre, but there are more people in Beaver Creek who either love you and Zander together, or don’t give a shit at all that he’s here.
” I laugh at the shock of her words. She turns back to me, a smirk on her red lips.
“I think you’ve opened the minds of a lot of people here.
They trust your judgement and they see him with you and Lucy and think, what’s the big deal? ”
“That's what I think, at least.”
She takes my hand and forces me to sit on one of two Muskoka chairs I have on the patio. She takes the one opposite mine and perches on the edge. Her hand comes down on my knee.
“This motion at the meeting is going to be a bust. I have tricks up my sleeve.” She winks.
“What kind of tricks?”
“Zander finding love gave me more hope than I admit. I decided…to follow my own heart. The two of you really have something. You can see the glow when you’re together.
I’ve spent over a decade grieving my husband and having a lot of other regrets.
If Zander can let go and let you into his life, then I can do that too. ”
I cover her hand with mine and squeeze. For the first time today I feel light and fluffy. “Peggy, are you in love?”
“I’m in love with a very powerful man on the town council. Zander’s not going anywhere.”