5. Nellie
FIVE
NELLIE
As we approach the front counter, I stop dead when I see how dark it is outside. Shit. I’d checked several times, and yet there was no mistaking what that darkness foretold.
“What’s wrong?” EG asks, coming up beside me.
“They didn’t call for rain today.”
His gaze follows mine. “You mean the weather people got it wrong? Shocking.”
“No, it’s just that I walked here and I’m in a white shirt and I didn’t bring an umbrella because why would I when they said it was going to be a clear sky kinda day.”
“It’s not a problem, LG,” he says calmly.
“Says the guy not wearing a white shirt and, well, not a woman.”
“No, it’s not a problem because I can give you a ride home.”
“But it’s the opposite way you’re going,” I whine and immediately hate myself for sounding like a spoiled brat. Twenty years old and fucking whining.
“Just think of it as another opportunity to ask me mundane questions.” When I look up at him, he’s smiling at me, but not his open-mouthed smile. This one is closed-lipped and serene. I don’t know how he’s managing it because usually that kind of smile would seem fake, but his is genuine. The kind of smile that would appear during a kiss. Nope, I need to stop that.
“I am good at those.”
As we’re paying, I try to get a look at the name on his credit card, but he’s onto me and covers it as he slips it into the card reader. I’m determined to get the name out of him before we get to my house.
Big drops of rain begin to fall as we’re about halfway to his car so we pick up our pace. Just as we jump in the sky opens.
“Maybe that was the most perfectly timed thing ever,” he breathes out, turning his key in the ignition.
I buckle in and then slip my bag behind my seat. “It’s so clean in here,” I say, looking around.
“Were you expecting empty fast food bags and dead rats?” he asks, one eyebrow quirked.
“No!” I throw my hands up defensively. “Okay, maybe one or two burger wrappers, but no rats.”
“I share the car with my sister, and she’s a neat freak. If it was solely mine, there would probably be some empty water bottles at the very least.” He shifts the car into gear and looks over at me expectantly.
“What?”
“Am I just driving around, or do you have directions for me?”
“Right, I’ve heard those help. We are going that way.” I point straight ahead. “So you’re already in a good position. Then you’ll make a left at the first stop sign after the lights, onto Renfrew. Then—”
“Whoa!” he cuts in, laughing. “How about just letting me know the next direction after I’ve completed the one right before it? ”
“As you wish,” I say sweetly, and if I’m not mistaken his eyes darken ever so slightly. But when he blinks, they are the pale blue they had been before. “Okay, questions.” I drum my hands on my knees, my mind suddenly blank. “Favorite dinosaur?”
He breathes out deeply, his eyes glued to the road. “A T-Rex. I think they were probably misunderstood.”
“You think a tyrannosaurus was misunderstood? Was it the teeth and general build of a predator that gave it away?”
“We assume it was the bad guy, but how could we ever truly know? No one was there to record anything. I mean, I trust all the science behind fossils, but they don’t tell us how they were behaviorally. They could have been amazing parents or scavengers, out there cleaning up dead things.”
I stare at him, waiting for him to laugh, but he doesn’t.
“I’ve got one,” he says, briefly looking over at me and catching me staring.
“Shoot.”
“What exactly do you want to do with your degree?”
I have to think for a minute because there are several paths I’ve considered taking. “Well, I do enjoy my job at our local library. Helping people find the perfect book and assisting with various children's programs. But I love the idea of working in the archives of some grand library.”
“I’m not going to lie, that sounds dusty.”
“Honestly, it would probably be the opposite of dusty. They keep old collections and documents in very specific rooms. Like a missile defense system against dust.”
“Do they have places like that here?”
“Yeah, although things would obviously be far newer than, say, in places like Italy or the UK. I’d love to go work for a bit at the University of Edinburgh. ”
He nods, his eyes still on the road. “Would you want to live abroad for a long time, or would it just be short term?”
I shrug. “I don’t really know. I haven’t thought of it that hard. I’ve got two more years of my undergrad before I start my master’s. I think I would go away with the intention of it being temporary, but you never know.” He gives a single nod, and his face is a bit pinched. “Don’t worry, there is plenty of time to become my best friend before I leave. Turn left here.”
The rest of the drive is pretty uneventful, and the rain stops five minutes in. I find out a bit more about his family, although it seems like he’s holding something back. I can’t be upset about that, though; we’ve only just waded into the waters of friendship. I tell him about my part-time jobs, and he tells me about his spring and summer baseball leagues, including the one year they played snow baseball for three weeks. And while I try not to let my imagination wander, I can’t help wondering what he looks like in his baseball uniform. Is he a socks-up-to-his-knees type? What color is his uniform? Because the idea of a blue jersey and white pants isn’t the worst visual.
All too soon he’s pulling into my driveway. I’m reaching around to grab my bag when I see the front door open out of the corner of my eye. When I turn around fully, I see my dad’s old apprentice, John Keisman, standing on the bottom step, hands on his hips, squinting at the car. John is a few years older than me and is currently doing his master’s in biology at Oxford. It’s been more than eight months since I’ve seen him, and I feel a bubble of excitement rise through me.
I look at EG and then back at John before settling my eyes on EG again. He’s looking at John too—actually, he’s glaring at John, so I lightly touch his arm to get his attention.
“Thanks for today, it was a nice change from doing all that stuff on my own.”
“Yeah.” His attention drifts back to John, and I’m wondering if he thinks he’s the boyfriend I do not have. I’m about to come clean, but he continues. “We, ah…” He rubs the back of his neck before looking back at me. “We should do it again sometime.”
I fight the giant smile that’s threatening to form. “I would love that.” His eyes dip to my lips, and I fight the urge to lean into him. “Have a safe drive home, Thomas.” I try one last name, earning another head shake before I exit the car and run at John who wraps me in a giant hug.
“I didn’t know you were home,” I squeal, barely noticing the sound of EG reversing out of the driveway.
“I’m not home for long.” He pulls me back in for a side hug as we make our way to the house. “I’m here for my brother’s wedding but had a free afternoon so figured I’d pop in to see your dad at the center for a bit.”
“You know this isn’t the center,” I tease as we walk into the house.
“I was wondering why it was so quiet and didn’t smell like a thousand pounds of bird shit. He sent me over for the box of mice in the garage freezer.”
“Ah.” Storage at the center is lacking so my dad keeps a lot of deliveries here until they have room. I’m just glad they got the extra freezer because the thought of opening the one in the kitchen and finding a box of dead mice is a surefire way to zap any kind of appetite.
“So who was the guy?”
“Just a friend,” I say, setting my bag down on the coffee table before flinging myself down on the couch.
“Just a friend?” he asks not so subtly.
“Yes, Johnathan, he’s just a friend. He thinks I have a boyfriend.”
He cringes. “Does he think I’m that boyfriend? ”
“I have no idea, but by the way he was looking at you, maybe.” I shrug and cross my ankles on the table.
“Do you want him to think I’m your boyfriend?” he asks, sitting in the armchair across from me.
I glare at him. “No, I don’t want him to think you’re my boyfriend.”
“Well, then.” He sighs and leans back like he’s never going to leave. “You’d better clear the air quickly. Unless of course you really do just want him to be your friend.”
“We literally just met. I just want to get to know him right now.” And that’s the truth. Am I attracted to EG? Yes. Is he nice? Yes. Is he someone I could see dating? Also yes. But I don’t know him yet, and I like to do my research before getting into anything serious.
John’s hands go up. “Okay, okay, I was just curious. He did kind of look familiar, though.”
“He went to Wellington High, he’s two years older than me, played baseball…”
John's eyebrows go up. “You think telling me he plays baseball may help me place him?”
I laugh. John kind of looks like a jock, but I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who has less interest in sports. “He also played the violin.”
“Siblings?”
“A twin sister Zoe, and an older brother, Will.”
He claps so suddenly that I nearly jump out of my skin. “Will Fletcher? I know him. Or I know of him, anyway. Biggest player north of Toronto. If his younger brother is anything like him, watch out.” If I hadn’t actually met EG, the warning in John’s voice would make me wary.
“Don’t worry, I’m not about to jump into bed with the guy. Like I said, we’re just getting to know each other. He’s nice, John. And people aren’t their siblings.” I give him a look that lets him know I’m not going to hold him responsible for the sins of his sister, who treated me like garbage after she found out I was becoming friends with her brother. Apparently, she thought I was gunning for her older brother when we worked together during the summers. Forget that I was only fifteen when we started working together, and he wasn’t about to break the law. Still, she hated that we were friends, and that made life around her hell. “How is dear Lori, anyway?”
“Being her nightmarish self. You’d think she was the one getting married. Bridemaidzilla? Bridesmaidzilla?” He waves off his attempts to rework Bridezilla. “Whatever, she sucks.”
“That she does. How is Oxford, smartypants?”
“It’s, it’s good.” He smiles at me and rubs his hand over his beard, which is his tell.
“Who are they?” I ask, sitting up. “Spill.”
“His name’s Nigel, and he’s in the same program.” I can’t help it and burst out laughing. “Wow, that’s exactly the reaction I was hoping for.”
“Oh my god, I’m sorry. It’s just, could you have found someone with a more English name?”
He looks less than impressed at me as he mutters. “Probably.”
“I’m sorry. Tell me more.”
“I met him at a party his roommate was having, and I was maybe casually dating the roommate at the time.”
“No way.”
“Yeah, it was kind of awkward, to be honest. She was pissed at first, thought I was just using her to get to him. Then after she cooled off, we chatted and she admitted that she didn’t feel any spark between us either.”
“When was that?”
“Six months ago.”
“Johnathan Lee Keisman, you’ve been seeing this guy for six months and haven’t said a word about him? There aren’t even any pictures of the two of you on social media.”
“He’s not out to his family.” Ah, that explains it then. John had come out to me at the end of our second summer working together. He’d also done it in the nerdiest way possible. He’d said, “ I think I’m like a Humboldt Penguin. ” I’d asked what made him say that, and then he’d just looked at me for a while until all the facts about Humboldt Penguins sorted themselves out in my mind. When my eyes went wide he just nodded. “ So you think… or you know? ” I asked. “ Well, I guess I know I’m not straight, other than that I don’t really have a distinct label .” And that was that. He had come out to my dad earlier in the week, but other than him, I was the only one who knew. John didn’t know how our small conservative town would take it. In the end, no one seemed to care all that much, and his family embraced him just as they always had. Seeing John happy was high on my list of wants. While it took fifteen years for us to get to know each other, he’d become like a brother to me in the five since.
“You still could have told me.”
“I know, I’m sorry. I think you’d like him, though.”
“If you like him, I’m sure I would too. So he’s not coming for the wedding?”
He smiles sadly and shakes his head. “Nah. Anyway—” He looks down at his watch. “I’ve gotta get those mice to your dad, and then I’ve got a suit fitting or I’m helping pick out fun socks for the groomsmen or something.” He stands, and we walk out to the garage together.
“I think I’ll give you a hug goodbye before you’ve got an arm full of deceased rodents.”
“Good idea.” He stops and holds his arms out wide.
He folds me into himself, and I mumble, “I’m happy for you, John. ”
“Give that guy a call or something and come clean if you want whatever it is between you to have a chance,” he says, leveling me with a look that has me promising to do just that. And then he’s gone, and I’m alone with my thoughts.
Lying about having a boyfriend hadn’t felt that huge at first, but now as I sit back down on the couch, I can’t help but think it was growing into something that could poison whatever chance I had with EG, even if it is purely friendship. And after spending the morning with him I can imagine being friends with him. I reach for my phone to lay it all bare when I see he's already texted me.
Enviro Guy
LG, I had a great time today. Thanks for putting up with me.
EG, it was a hardship, but one I was able to endure easier than I had anticipated.
I don’t know if you’d be interested, but I’ve got a game tomorrow night in Sherman. Would you want to maybe come watch for a bit?
Just for a bit?
Well, you may get bored and want to leave. I would hate to hold you there against your will.
Such a gentleman. What time?
The game starts at 8. We’ll be there around 7:30 for warmups.
By eight, both my parents would be home from work and I’d have a car. I would also be able to answer the socks up or socks down question that was no doubt going to plague my mind.
I’d like that!
Awesome. It’s at the Sherman Lions Park, 30 Standford Dr. See ya tomorrow.
Looking forward to it!
I set my phone down and lean back again. Tomorrow. I can tell him tomorrow. In person is always better anyway.