7. Nellie
SEVEN
NELLIE
EG is good. At least I think he’s good—it’s not a game I understand well. But the other team doesn’t get many hits, and he looks good doing what he does. When he walked out of the dugout to warm up, I bit my lower lip so hard I was sure I’d make it bleed. Have baseball uniforms always looked that good? Or does it just look good because of the guy wearing it? Some of the players definitely have tighter pants, and some looked like they’d lose them without the belt. EG’s fit snuggly but don’t look too tight, and the socks pulled up to his knees did something to my brain that I was not prepared for. Why the hell is that such a good look?
“Who are you here with?” the woman next to me asks.
“Oh,” I stammer, feeling panic creep in as I look back at EG. “Just a friend. The, uh, the pitcher.”
She follows my line of sight. “He’s not your boyfriend?”
“No!” I say, probably too quickly.
I look over to see she’s wearing the smuggest grin. Her blue eyes slide to mine and that grin turns into a full-on smile, and that’s when I see the teeth that are just a little bit too pointy. Shit, EG’s twin sister has caught me ogling her brother.
“It’s funny,” she mumbles. “I didn’t peg you as the type.”
We’d talked for five minutes, I don’t know how she’d be able to peg me as anything. “As what type?” I ask, letting my eyes wander to the field and settle back on EG just in time to see him finish another strikeout.
“The cheating type.” I nearly give myself whiplash because of how fast my head swings back around. She fully laughs this time. “Ah, because you’re not, are you?” I shake my head slowly. “So why does he think you have a boyfriend?”
I swallow and look back at the field. “Because I told him I did.”
“Why?”
“Because he was a stranger on a train, and it just came out when he asked for my number.”
She stares unblinking at me for a minute before her eyes narrow. “My brother, the guy in blue throwing the balls.” She points to the field. “That guy… asked for your number?” She sounds genuinely shocked.
“Yeah. He sort of helped me at the station then saved me a seat, and we got talking and eventually he asked for my number, and ‘I don’t think my boyfriend would like that’ sort of slipped out.”
“So what now? You’re just going to keep acting like you have a boyfriend while you attend his games to drool all over him?”
“I’m not drooling all over him,” I say, sitting back and crossing my arms.
“Well, maybe not literally, but figuratively speaking, you sure as shit are.”
I don’t respond, just watch as he leaves the mound. When he glances up at me and smiles, I can’t help but grin back .
“It’s obvious you like each other. I mean, I don’t know you from that chick with blue hair over there, but Teddy’s never been the aggressive type when it comes to women. Apparently, my older brother and I got 100% of that gene, so if he asked for your number, that’s not nothing.”
Teddy . My eyes find him where he’s lounging in the dugout.
“Zoe fucking Fletcher!” a voice calls from the end of the bleachers. “When the hell did you get home?”
“Mary-Anne Losani!” Zoe jumps up before turning back to me. “Tell him the truth, Red. He’s a good guy. He deserves it.” Then she leaps off the bleachers and into the other woman’s arms, both of them shrieking like banshees.
The thing is, I had every intention of telling him, but now I’m not sure I want to. While I do want things to change, I also want to get to know him more as a friend. You could just tell him that you know , a little voice says at the back of my mind. That would be the mature thing to do. But what if he’s mad that I lied, or he doesn’t believe I may eventually want more?
As I’m having the most epic of internal battles, I catch EG, Teddy, looking at me again. He smiles, and everything goes quiet in my brain. It’s like the time my parents took me snorkeling in Indonesia, the world quieting the second my head slipped below the surface. He’s done that a lot since I met him, made my brain quiet down a bit. Dulled the constant thoughts racing through it. His ability to soothe and unnerve me at the same time is wild. My brain stills while my body comes alive.
Zoe climbs back up beside me to grab her bag and once again catches us staring at each other. “Can you let Teddy know I’m heading out with a friend?” she asks before putting her hand on my arm and squeezing a bit. “Just be honest with him.”
Just be honest with him .
The game doesn’t make it to the final inning. Apparently, there is something called a mercy rule, and Teddy’s team scored so many runs that their opponents begged for the bleeding to stop. I’m glad it’s over already for two reasons. First of all, it’s getting chillier and I’m not dressed for it, and secondly, I’m starting to wonder if the people sharing the bench with me could feel me vibrating with nervousness through the metal seat. A totally normal way to feel while waiting to tell a friend that you lied about having a boyfriend.
After the teams shake hands and disappear back in their dugouts, I begin to count slowly, trying to give myself something else to focus on. He’s walking towards me with his bag before I get to ten. There’s something different about the way he’s carrying himself tonight. He’s almost got swagger, like someone who pitched a perfect game. At least that’s what people were talking about around me; I still don’t know the rules or all the terms. But I do know that I like the way he’s walking my way. And if I hadn’t already decided to come clean, I’d be making it now.
“I think you undersold your abilities when you said you were just okay,” I say, slowly making my way down to where he’s standing.
“Oh, well, in this league I’m a fucking superstar.” He laughs, hauling his bag over his shoulder. My eyes go to the forearm holding the bag, and I try not to focus too hard on how his muscles and veins move beneath the skin. “Do you know where my sister went?” he asks, looking around.
“She said she was going out with a friend.”
“I thought I heard Mary-Anne’s voice.”
“That is the name she said, so I guess you did.” This is going to be awkward , I think as I’ve now greeted him and told him what Zoe asked me to. What more is there to say?
He’s just standing there looking at me, and I’m doing my best to not just throw myself at him or run away. Both seem like incredibly over-the-top reactions to a slightly uncomfortable silence. And then his hand is coming towards my face, and I all but stop breathing.
“Eyelash,” he whispers, pulling his fingers back. I’m just starting to think that this is one of those ridiculously romantic moments that only exist on screen when he goes and flicks the lash off his finger.
“Did you just flick away my wish?” I ask.
He looks down at his fingers, then in the direction he flicked it as if he’ll be able to find the discarded lash, then his head snaps back in my direction “Seriously?”
“You never know when one’s going to come true, Teddy.”
“There are like 300 of those dandelion things… Wait, did you just say Teddy?”
Oops, I hadn’t meant to let that slip just yet. “Who’s Teddy?” I ask, trying to play it off like I hadn’t said it.
His eyes narrow at me, and he sighs. “Fucking Zoe,” he curses up at the sky although the smile on his face softens the words a bit.
“Did she know I didn’t know your name?”
“Until tonight she didn’t even know you existed.”
“Hmm.” I tap my chin. “She knew about my boyfriend.” His eyes go wide, and all the color seems to drain from his face as he looks anywhere but at me. Lady up, Nell, tell him the truth. I let him stew in his embarrassment for half a second longer before adding, “Who doesn’t exist, by the way.” And when he looks back at me, it’s my turn to look everywhere but at him.
“As in, you broke up?” he asks.
I shake my head slowly. “There was no one to break up with.”
“Why did you tell me you had one?” he asks quietly .
“You were a stranger asking for my number.”
“You could have just said no.”
“No doesn’t always work. Hell, ‘I’m seeing someone’ doesn’t always work either.” He sits on the bottom bench, and I slowly lower myself down beside him. “If it helps, your acceptance of my answer made me feel bad for lying to you.”
“Why didn’t you tell me yesterday?” Because I’m twenty, dumb, and a bit freaked out by this cute guy who seems to want to just spend time with me even if that means he can’t get in my pants? “Who was that guy at your house?”
“John’s just a friend. He’s been away at school in England, and I hadn’t seen him in eight months.”
“That definitely explains your enthusiasm, then.” He sighs, and his shoulders hunch forward. “I wish you’d just told me, LG.”
“Me too.” I reach over and take his hand in both of mine. “You’re just so damn nice, and I didn’t know if it was an act or like… real.”
He’s looking at his hand in mine and squeezes my fingers gently. “My curse is that I’m a nice guy.”
“I happen to like that you’re a nice guy.”
“Well, obviously we all want nice friends.” My god, he sounds sad.
“Look, we just met. I like this new friendship, but I kind of also want to kiss you or let you kiss me or mutually agree to let our lips collide.”
Those icy blues meet mine, hope and worry warring within. “I feel like there’s another ‘but’ in there.”
“But… I… it’s just…” Good lord, I’m making such a mess of this.
“But you’re not there yet.”
“But I’m not there yet.” I nod. “I want to be,” I rush to add.
“It’s okay, LG.” He squeezes my hand again. “It’s been what… four days since we met? Would I like to kiss you? Hell yes. But I also have liked just talking to you and getting to know you as Nellie.” Did his voice get deeper and smoother when he said my name? Fuck, now I really want to kiss him.
We sit there for a while, both just staring at our hands, still folded together.
“So, want to come to the bar? The team goes after every game.”
I look at my watch. Nine thirty. “Yeah, I could come for a bit.”