Chapter 11 Harper
HARPER
By the time we loaded into my Jeep, the late morning sun had already warmed the faux leather seats enough to make me regret wearing leggings. I cracked the windows and tossed my purse into the back, taking a deep breath before starting the engine.
The dash still smelled faintly like my lavender car spray. The scent was familiar and grounding. It felt good to be behind the wheel again—even if we were heading straight toward whatever mess waited for us at Lena’s apartment.
Wren climbed into the passenger seat, her long auburn hair still damp from the shower she had taken a few hours before.
I can’t remember the last time she wore her hair braided.
It hung loosely down her back, falling just above her tailbone.
It had gotten so long this past year. Her normally pale freckles were darker because of the summer sun.
As fall began, they would lighten again, as they did every year.
She had changed into a fitted powder blue V-neck and leggings.
The color was super out of character for her.
I think dating Reed was making her come out of her comfort zone.
She was truly so beautiful. I loved my best friend.
She looked calm, but I could feel her watching me.
“So,” I said, mostly to fill the silence, “this is a fair warning, I am definitely going to cry.”
I shifted into reverse, checked over my shoulder, and backed out of the driveway.
Wren turned toward me, her voice light but way too calculated.
“Is there something going on between you and Cam?”
My heart skipped a beat, hitting the brakes slightly. I wasn’t even sure if something was going on between us. We had a moment between us, but it’s been a week, and we haven’t even talked about it. “What made you ask that?”
She shrugged, acting like it was no big deal, but her eyes told a different story. “Just the way he looked at you before he left. And that laugh when he accidentally scared you? Yeah, I don’t think I have heard him laugh like that in years.”
I snorted, rolling my eyes. “Cam laughs like that when people fall or trip or choke on their own spit. It’s nothing new.”
“But he looked at you differently,” she said, “like he saw something you didn’t want him to.”
I laughed again, trying to wave her off. “There’s nothing going on. Seriously. He’s just Cam. He’s always been just Cam.”
Wren didn’t reply, just kept twisting the extra hair tie on her wrist while looking out the window.
I tapped my fingers on the wheel, jaw tightening slightly.
“Anyway, Lena was saying she just needs help with a few more things. It seems like downsizing isn’t her thing.
I mentioned mailing some boxes to her once she was situated.
I figured she would fly to Oregon, and I feel like that may be the best move.
” My voice sounded quieter when I spoke again.
“I’m just hoping when she leaves, she doesn’t forget to call or video call every once in a while. ”
Wren finally looked at me again, softer now. “We’ll figure it out together. And why wouldn’t she call? We are literally her only friends.”
We laughed in agreement. We drove the rest of the way in silence, but my stomach was already turning.
I hadn’t let myself think about what it would feel like to watch Lena leave.
To see the apartment we shared together for years empty.
But still buried under all the nerves and emotions, Cam was still in my head.
* * *
It was so odd seeing my old apartment so bare.
Lena had sold most of the extra furniture she didn’t want to haul to Portland.
I was wondering if keeping some of the furniture meant she wasn’t flying.
Everything else was in its designated box, stacked in the empty living room.
Wren walked up to her cousin and wrapped her arms around her.
Lena looked absolutely exhausted. Her calico dyed hair was tied in a messy top knot with strands of blonde, orange, and black sticking out of it.
She wasn’t wearing any makeup, and her eyes were red-rimmed as if she had been crying most of the morning.
Her baggy plaid pajama pants and red hoodie looked cozy, but it was unlike Lena to not get ready for the day.
Wren pulled back from the hug and cupped her face in her hands.
She spoke to Lena in the softest voice I have ever heard her use.
“You’re going to be okay. We will be there with you every step of the way.
You are going to do such big things, Le.
You have worked so hard for this. I am so fucking proud of you, Lena.
We will visit when we can, or you can always fly home to visit.
And we will be here if you ever want to come home. ”
Tears streamed down Lena’s face as Wren pulled her back into a hug.
I stood there watching my best friends say goodbye to each other.
I knew Lena was going off to live out her dreams, but this fucking sucked.
It had been the three of us forever. We helped each other grow up. They were practically my sisters.
I walked up and threw my arms around them, and we all cried.
“Little Lena Ivy isn’t so little anymore, huh?
” I laughed through tears. That was her nickname we gave her because she was so tiny all her life.
Even though she was only a year younger, she has been five feet tall since forever, not that we were much taller.
Lena broke apart the hug and dried her tears with her hoodie sleeve. “I never thought I’d be the first one to leave Sawyers Cove.”
“Are you excited? When do you leave?” Wren asked as she took a seat on the floor, using a boxes as back support. We followed suit.
“Mixed emotions. I am thrilled that I got this job opportunity. But honestly? I am going to miss it here so much. There’s something more than just you two that makes me want to stay.
Shocking, I know. But that is a convo for a different day.
It’s a thirty-five-hour car ride,” she rubbed her temples as she spoke.
“Fucking hell, the U haul is going to be a fortune. I leave tomorrow morning, like five in the morning or something.”
I was a bit confused; thirty-five hours was a hell of a long time to drive alone. Especially if she was stopping off in random states to sleep. That didn’t sound safe to me. “Le, you're making that drive alone? Are you sure that’s safe?”
“Oh God, no. It would take me three days to get there. My bo–my friend is driving with me.” Wren and I looked at each other, but Lena kept talking before we had a chance to ask.
“So, today I just need help loading up the last of the boxes into the U haul. They’re pretty light, should be easy enough! ”
I looked from Lena to Wren, then back to Lena. “Lena, what friend? As far as I knew, we were your closest friends, but you trust someone else to drive with you at night?”
“Matter of fact, Harpoone, I do.” She didn’t specify which friend, just stood up and grabbed a box. “If you fuckers will follow me!” Lena made her trek towards the door and waited for us to grab a box and follow her.
It didn’t take long to finish loading up the truck. Walking back into the empty apartment was so sad. She was really going. This fucking sucked. I feel like I have lost everything, or was in the process of it.
What was I going to do when it was Wren’s turn to move out, or when she became too busy with my brother to remember I existed? I could feel myself start to spiral when Wren pulled me from my thoughts. She wrapped an arm over my shoulder before she asked Lena an excellent question.
“Le, where are you sleeping tonight?” Wren asked at the perfect time because Lena was too tired to deflect and just answered the question.
“At Dax’s. Why?” She went from lying on the bare floor to standing within a matter of seconds. Wren gasped, and I threw a hand over my mouth. “Please tell me I didn’t just say that out loud.” Her hands covered her face.
“WHAT?” Wren was shocked. Flabbergasted. Stunned. “Why the fuck is this the first time I am hearing of this?”
Lena uncovered one eye and huffed, “Because you weren’t supposed to know. With me leaving, we decided not to say anything.”
I laughed. Far too loud for far too long. “What the fuck, Lena? Why wouldn’t you tell us! It’s us, girl, come on.”
“I can tell you now because after I get to Portland, we are done.” Now I understand the real reason for her tears. Her eyes glistened in the dimmed light. “Come sit with me for one last girlie chat in this living room.”
Wren gave a weak smile and then sat first. I sat next to Wren and Lena in front of us as she explained.
“It was during that bonfire at the start of last summer that we had. You guys remember?” We nodded in unison.
“Wren, when you left to get fucked in the woods, Dax and I exchanged numbers.” Her smile softened, turning almost shy.
“He told me the first impression I made was everything he’d ever wanted. That I was confident. Independent. That I knew who I was. And he said he didn’t want to change any of that—not even a little. He just wanted to be with me as I was.”
She was glowing as she told us, like she were reliving the moment all over again.
“I said no to him and explained that I was worried the thirteen-year age gap would leave us with nothing in common. I couldn’t have been more wrong.
We texted for a few days, then those turned into calls and video calls.
Eventually, I agreed to a date, and the rest is history.
” A tear slipped down her cheek. “Guys. I am so in love with him. Like, I don’t think I have ever loved or been loved like this.
He is everything to me. I know it’s been like what?
A little over a year, but the man knows what he wants.
Perks of him being thirty-nine, I guess. ”
I was smiling so hard I had to rub the ache out of my cheek.
“Lena, I wish you had told us. I’m so happy for you.
I love Dax, and I definitely could picture you two together.
Are you sure you want to go? Or break things off?
Isn’t that like the opposite thing you're supposed to do in these situations?”
Wren hit my arm and shot a glare. “What Harper means to say is we are so happy for you, and we know you probably weighed the options for a long time. We are so proud of you for following your dreams, Le.”
Lena laughed through her tears. “I don’t know. I want to do what I have been working towards for the past few years. Being a hair and makeup artist on the set of a movie is such a rare opportunity bu–”
I didn’t let her finish. “Lena, so is what you have with Dax. At least give a long-distance relationship a try. I think if you brought it up, you would be surprised at the outcome.”
Wren gave a shrug as a sign that she agreed.
Lena sighed, “If it were up to me, I would just stay or even try the long-distance thing. I’d marry the idiot and have five hundred kids with him.
But it’s not just my choice. Dax wants me to go.
He doesn’t want to be the reason I give up my dreams. He told me he loves me, but once I am gone, we are done because I deserve to be happy, and he worries if I meet someone who makes me happier than he does, side note, not possible, then I should be free to be with them.
If you love something, set it free, or so he says. ”
Wren huffed. “Well, fuck. So, this is it. Your last night together before the move?”
Lena smiled, but she didn’t meet her eyes. “Yup. So, whenever you guys go, I’ll head over there. This is actually my first time going over there. We wanted to keep everything private, and with him and your boyfriend living together, that would’ve been kind of hard.”
I reached out my hand and rested it on her knee. “We get it, Lena. Let’s say our goodbyes so you can be with the man you love. I am happy for you, but heartbroken at the same time. I love you so much. Don’t forget about us when you’re rich and famous.” I stood and pulled her up into an embrace.
As I hugged her one last time, we all cried together. Wren held Lena after I pulled away and whispered something in her ear that I couldn’t quite make out. We said our final goodbyes and walked out of the apartment for the last time.