Chapter 21 #2
My gaze meets Finn’s, and even in my carnal state of mind, I still start to wonder whether the same thoughts are plaguing his mind.
If he’s also wondering if what’s happening stems from pure passion surrounding the moment, or if it could possibly be down to genuine feelings for the other person.
I wonder, for him, if I were to attempt to offer the same level of pleasure that Finn is supplying, if he would begin to question its origins, too.
A twinge of pain mixed with a larger burst of pleasure rips me from my thoughts. I’m pulled back into the moment by Finn’s fingers filling me without warning. My groans fill the corridor.
“Stay with me, Cherry baby.”
It must have been clear on my face that I’d been in my head, or maybe my reactions had started to dull. Not sure how, though, because even when deep in my thoughts, I can still feel the undeniable pull of an orgasm.
I moan into Finn’s shoulder; an absolutely feeble attempt at keeping myself quieter than I’ve so far been.
I shouldn’t be surprised that he knows exactly how to stimulate me when he’s finger-fucking me, considering he did such a phenomenal job before this.
It’s not that I expect Finn to be bad, it’s more that I don’t expect him to exhibit such professionalism.
He pays attention to every noise, every command to stay exactly where he is, every plea for him to keep going.
His entire attention is on me, with no impatience, no speed to say that he managed to get the job done.
On the contrary, he looks downright feral, his eyes hungrily taking me in.
He watches the space between us, where his fingers move in and out of me at a leisurely pace, like he has all the time in the world.
He stops, pulling out his fingers entirely, completely ignoring my cries of protest. He inspects his fingers.
“God, Cherry, you have my fingers fucking glistening.”
He’s not wrong, the low lighting catches evidence of my arousal with such ease.
It’s bright enough that I’m also able to see Finn sucking my arousal off of himself. His growl is animalistic, absolutely feral.
He closes his eyes, his face scrunched in pain. “If we weren’t in a fucking dive bar right now, Oakleigh, I’d be bending you over quicker than you could tie a cherry stem.”
And just like that, I’m furious that we’re in a dive bar.
Finn cups my cheeks with both hands, the gentleness of the action completely out of place beside the hunger in his eyes and his words. He tucks a stray hair behind my ears and dips down to kiss me once more.
“If this is the kind of show I’d be getting every time I go to pee, I’ll be a lot better about drinking water.”
I expect Finn to put some distance between us at the sound of Bash’s voice beside us.
It’s what I would do if I wasn’t currently trapped between a wall of muscle and a brick wall.
But no, he turns us instead, his body shielding me from Bash’s gaze.
He immediately turns protective, animalistic for a whole other reason.
He only watches me as he asks Bash, “How long have you been standing there?”
“Hey, don’t get mad at me. You two are the ones who decided to do that right by the men’s bathroom,” Bash protests.
“Just go and fucking pee, Sebastian!”
“Alright, alright!”
I hear the door to the men’s bathroom open and close.
“I’m so sorry about that, Cherry.”
“It’s fine,” I reply, my voice shaky. “I didn’t hear him, either.”
“It’s my job to protect you. I should have been listening out.” He lifts my chin up, forcing me to look at him. The moment I do, his face softens, a soft smile on his lips. “We’re not done, by the way. I’m not leaving you unsatisfied like that, but we’ll have to finish it when we’re alone.”
One more tender kiss is planted on my lips before he grabs my hand and leads me back to the group.
Wren notices our return and makes her way over to us. I’m wrapped up in a hug that soothes my fired-up nerves.
“I barely get to see you anymore,” she says into my ear. “I miss you.”
My eyes close and guilt trips my heartbeat.
I’ve admitted to myself that I’m avoiding Wren.
The thought of lying to my best friend, especially when the lie involves her family, it doesn’t sit right with me, and so I thought the best way to avoid that would be to avoid her.
It’s cowardly, and wrong on a lot of levels.
The smart thing to do would have been to talk to Finn about it, but I’ve been nervous that it would be a conversation that follows the same template my exes created.
“I want to talk about this thing I’m struggling with.”
“Sounds like your problem to me.”
“Could you help me with it?”
“I have enough on my plate. Not every one of your problems needs to be mine, too.”
Every time I ever tried the whole “vulnerability” thing with someone I’m seeing, it’s always blown up in my face.
Now, instead of being self-conscious and insecure, all it’s done is make me bitter and hardened my exterior.
Letting people in is something I just don’t do.
Not anymore. Yet even though I’ve kept my walls up this whole time, Finn seems to have found a crack large enough for his wide shoulders and long legs to fit through.
“I miss you, too, Wrennie.” It’s not a lie.
I miss my best friend more than anything.
All of this stuff about possibly developing feelings for Finn is something that I would always go to her about, just as she came to me when she started falling for Gus.
But I can’t do that without revealing that our entire relationship is fake.
“I’ve been meaning to tell you something,” she says with a mischievous grin. She drags me back to the booth, sliding in and dragging me in with her.
“Whoa, whoa, slow down there, hotshot.”
I pretty much fall on top of her, landing in the booth with absolutely no grace. My best friend’s rich laugh triggers my own low one.
“Sorry.” She waits for me to adjust myself. “Okay, so as you know, Gus and I are engaged…”
I gasp dramatically, my hand coming to cover my mouth. “Shut. Up. Are you?”
Wren rolls her eyes. “You’re hilarious. My point is … you remember I told you I wanted something big but also not too big so it doesn’t overwhelm Gus?”
“Yes, and I’ve been looking for ages for venues. As your maid of honor, I’m taking this so seriously.”
“Oh, I know you are. That’s not what I wanted to talk to you about.”
“What is it?”
She takes a steadying breath and bites her lip. She’s a dizzying mix of nerves and excitement.
“Don’t hate me, but I’ve changed my mind.”
“Why the hell would I hate you for changing your mind?”
“Because you’ve been doing all of this research for us, and time is not necessarily something you have an abundance of what with your job.”
I hold her hand between mine. “Wren, if when you were planning my party, I had come to you to say that I’d changed my mind about what I wanted and instead was thinking of some small dinner, would you have been mad at me?”
“Of course not!”
“So then shut the fuck up and tell me what your new plan is.”
She’s nothing but gratitude and relief as she looks at me. “I want to have a small wedding on the farm. The barn is perfect for it.”
“When you say small…”
“I mean everyone here, my family, and everyone in town who is like family to us. Nigel and Simone, obviously, Mickey, people like that, you know?”
“Sounds perfect for the two of you, what with the two of you only having enough friends combined to fill the first row.”
Wren laughs through her shock, pushing me so hard, I almost fall out of the booth again. In the corner of my eye, I see Bash rejoin the group and I feel my face become hot.
“Oh, and the most important part,” Wren continues, seemingly oblivious to my embarrassment. I turn my attention back to her. “I want to keep this a secret from Gus.”
Hold on. “Come again?”
“I know it sounds bad.”
“What, keeping the plans for your wedding a secret from the groom? No, no, not at all.”
“Alright, Ms. Sarcastic, listen to my explanation.”
I wait patiently. Her expression turns serious and I mirror it because it’s rare that you see Wren so somber.
“He’s been struggling with the planning, I think. Things tend to change so quickly that he never has time to adjust and he’s just been stressed all the time and nothing I do is lessening that. And, please believe me, Lee, when I say that I’ve tried everything.”
“Thank you for that mental image.” I cringe as I force the thought of my bestie and her fiancé going at it in the study or something.
“Sorry. All I mean to say is that the man is miserable, and I want to take this weight off of his shoulders. I’ve already mentioned to him that I can just plan the whole thing and run certain decisions by him, and he’s said that while that would be a dream for him, he refuses to leave it all to me. ”
That sounds like Gus—thoughtful and helpful.
“And you’re sure he wouldn’t be upset if you do this?”
Her silence says plenty.
“Babe, you need to talk to him if you’re not sure. Hell, at the very least, talk to his brothers and see what they think. In order for this plan to work, you’d need them in on it, anyway, so you may as well run it past them.”
I don’t miss the hint of disappointment before she tries to cover it with a shy smile.
“You’re right,” she says as she pushes a brown curl back. “I’ll definitely talk to them about it, and if they also think I should run it by Gus, then I will.”
“That’s my girl.” With a smile and one more hug, we go back to watching Bash and Sam argue over whether or not Bash is cheating at their game of pool.