Chapter Thirty-Two
Ali wasn’t a gambler. She thought it was stupid to risk losing something valuable for fun.
But that didn’t mean she didn’t take chances on things that mattered.
It had been a leap to divorce Kyle, to buy a house of her own, to stay in the town she’d grown up in even if it meant being haunted by her past at every turn.
Taking a risk that JT would be angry with her or unhappy to have this surprise thrust on her was one of the bigger risks she’d ever taken.
But seeing JT’s face, her happy tears, and the dawning realization that the town she’d had a rocky relationship with was full of people who adored her was worth every minute of planning and worrying and calling in every favor she had in town.
“I hope you understand how much everyone here loves you.” Ali said it before her brain could tell her to stop. She wasn’t telling JT she loved her. That’s not what this was. How could it be? They were something that wasn’t quite friends but it wasn’t love. That was silly. It had been a few days.
Well, a lifetime of knowing each other, and a few days of spending time together doing silly couple things.
Before this week, her relationship with JT had been an add-on to JT’s friendship with Tommy.
Ali was like a free-gift-with-purchase who drove them around before they got their licenses and told them which high school teachers were mean and which ones were easy graders.
When Ali thought back, she didn’t remember JT talking much around her, which made more sense now, knowing that JT had harbored a crush on Ali as a preteen.
When she thought back on JT’s shy smiles and small kindnesses—like bringing Ali ice cream when she and Tommy had gone out for cones—she saw the seedlings of the kind, thoughtful woman JT had become.
But that history and a few amazing days together couldn’t be love.
JT lived somewhere far away. And she might never live nearby, and Ali had her own complicated relationship with her mom and Kyle and the way the town expected her to be, but she loved it here.
She’d come back because this town needed teachers who cared deeply about kids who grew up in all kinds of circumstances in rural New Hampshire.
Kids who fit in and were prom queen and kids who barely made it to class because home was a disaster.
Kids who fit nowhere but in her classroom and kids who didn’t know who they were and kids who didn’t know if they could be who they were in rural New Hampshire.
Those were her kids. Every single one of them was a reason to stay even when Kyle’s stupid face and her mom’s stupid questions made her want to start over somewhere else. The kids kept her there.
“So, how many of these kids do you know?” JT asked, nodding toward the ice.
Ali smiled. “All of them, obviously. They aren’t all in my classes but it’s hard not to know the kids in a town this small. You know that.”
JT smiled and watched warm-ups. “So, did you pick out a place for us to watch the game? And do they serve cocoa here?”
Ali tucked her arm through JT’s. “I thought we could sit up there so people can talk to you if they want to. And yes, they make terrible cocoa mix with hot water in the lobby.”
“Marshmallows?”
Ali smiled. How was this woman so cute all the time? “Of course. The packets come with them, but those melt with the hot water. But if you play your cards right, I’ll get the moms to hook us up.”
“I’d like that. You know how I feel about marshmallows.”
“After the first contest, I think I have a pretty good sense of your feelings about them.”
JT took a step toward the stands, her foot paused on the first wooden bleacher.
“What you don’t know is I have a real soft spot for crappy rink cocoa.
It tastes like my childhood. Of course, my tastes have gotten slightly more sophisticated.
I appreciate bougie cocoa and fancy marshmallows, but there’s something about a Swiss Miss packet and a scoop of grocery store marshmallows. ”
Ali followed JT to a space on the bleachers near the top. “You’re a woman who appreciates the simple things.”
JT stared at the ice. “I know what I like.” She turned her head to look at Ali. “And when I find something I like, I stick with it.”
“Oh yeah?”
JT nodded, a tiny smile playing at the corner of her lips. She didn’t have a chance to say more because a gaggle of kids swarmed her and asked her to sign their shirts.
“Is this okay with your grown-ups? I don’t want to get anyone in trouble for writing on your clothes.
” JT searched the stands to find the adults who were with the kids.
She mimed writing in the air and got a round of thumbs-ups.
“Okay, if your folks say it’s fine. Why don’t you all tell me your names. ”
It took the rest of warm-ups for her to sign and talk to all the kids. One girl, who had to be about five, sat next to her and stared up at her until all the other kids left. Only then did she speak.
“My name’s Gretel and I love playing hockey but my brothers tell me I’m too little. But I don’t care. I’m going to be big like you someday and then I’m going to beat them both.” Her high voice was hard to understand because it was so squeaky, but JT followed every single word.
“You tell your brothers that it doesn’t matter how big you are if you have enough heart. And I think you have plenty of heart, Gretel. If they don’t let you play, you let me know and you can be on my team, okay?”
Gretel grinned and pushed a strand of hair out of her face. “Bye, JT. You’re my favorite.” She wrapped her arms around JT and gave her a tight hug before hopping off the seat and hurrying back to her family.
JT looked at Ali. “God, how do you deal with all these kids and not have you heart explode?”
Ali laughed. “For starters, I have the high schoolers who aren’t so earnest or forthright.
But some days it’s hard not to explode. They’re so amazing, even the real stinkers will usually have a moment now and again that makes you realize they’re not totally rotten.
The kids are the best thing about teaching. ”
“And the worst?”
Ali laughed. “Everything but the kids. Administration, lack of funding, living in a state that thinks education is unnecessary, the parents. But I still wouldn’t trade it for another job. At least at this point. Talk to me in a decade.”
JT nodded and watched the teams line up for a faceoff. “Hopefully, I have time to figure it out, but I will have to come up with a real job at some point.” She watched the action on the ice. “Hey, these kids are good.”
“You sound surprised.”
“It wasn’t that long ago that there was no girls’ team at all.”
Ali pointed to the banner. “Yeah, six years. But these girls always had someone to look up to. That can make a big difference, don’t you think?”
JT blushed. Ali loved that she could do it so easily. “Come on. None of these kids knew who I was back then.”
Ali waved her hand around the crowd. “See all those little girls who came up to you, they know who you are. Do you think these kids out there didn’t? You were the captain of the boys’ team and you won the state championship. Everyone knew who you were.”
JT’s expression darkened. No more cute blushing. “Yeah, I heard what everyone said about me back then.” Her tone was hurt, bitter, nothing like the light banter they’d been having.
Ali leaned her shoulder against JT’s. “Yeah, people around here sure can suck. But it’s only been six years and anyone who didn’t love you then, because they were too stupid or small-minded, they do now.”
Before JT could acknowledge the sentiment, she leaped out of her seat and startled the crap out of Ali.
The rink exploded in cheers. Hart’s Landing had scored, and the girls on the ice mobbed the scorer before skating the length of the ice to tap gloves with the bench and then their own goalie.
She turned to Ali and hugged her while lifting her off the stands.
Ali held on for dear life. JT gently put her down. “Sorry. But that was awesome!”
Ali sighed happily. She’d been to a lot of games over the years.
Tommy and JT had been teammates in high school so her family always went to the games.
Although, to be fair, Tommy had been on the third line and hadn’t played nearly as much as JT.
But he’d be the first to jump to her defense if the other team tried to take any cheap shots at her.
Ali thought warmly of her brother, who’d been capable, even as a teenager, of being proud of his best friend and not jealous of all the attention she got.
He was her biggest fan. It was sweet. It made what he’d pulled the other night with her so much worse.
Ali knew he’d been trying to protect her, but it still wasn’t fair to JT.
“Hey, did my brother talk to you?” Ali nodded to the far side of the stands where Tommy was talking to someone Ali didn’t recognize.
JT nodded. “Oh yeah. Grovel city. He apologized for like ten minutes before I cut him off.” JT laughed and shook her head. “It was pretty pathetic. Did you scream at him or something?”
Ali shrugged. “Let’s just say I was very clear about my thoughts and feelings about his behavior and I have every expectation that he will not disappoint me in the future.”
JT’s jaw dropped. “Oh my god, is that your teacher voice?” Ali saw her throat bob as she swallowed. “That was… Oh my god, I can’t believe I’m hot for teacher, but damn, Porter.”
Ali felt her face blush hot. “I can neither confirm nor deny but you better believe that if someone steps out of line in my classroom, I know how to deal with it.”
Ali didn’t have long to appreciate the lust in JT’s eyes because she was interrupted by an unpleasant voice.
“Ali, was that ceremony your doing?” Kyle asked from a step below them. “So nice of you to help your new friend in such a public way.” He raised his eyebrows in a way he probably thought looked cool, but instead he looked like a creep.
“Hi Kyle. Nice of you to stop by. I swear, any time I go anywhere in this town, there you are. Almost makes me wonder…” Ali said before returning her gaze to the game, hopefully giving him the hint to leave her alone.
“Funny how that happens in a town this small. How long are you sticking around for, Cox? I heard you hated it here.”
JT gave him a bored expression, but Ali could tell it was fake. “I’m here for the rest of the contest, obviously.” She looked at Ali. “But after that, who knows.”
Ali watched Kyle’s face change from cocky douche to shades of anger. Thankfully, his date showed up and took his arm and greeted them both.
“My niece plays on varsity this year, so we thought we’d come cheer for her.” She looked at JT. “She thinks you’re the coolest. Would you sign my program for her?”
JT smiled. “Of course. That’s so nice of you to say. What’s her name?”
“Molly.”
JT signed the program and handed it back to Sharon. “Here you go. But I’ll be here until the end, so if she wants to come say hi, please tell her I’d love to meet her.”
Kyle’s gaze never left Ali. “We gotta go get some food before the rush between periods. Come on, Sharon.”
They left but Ali seethed. “How on earth was I with that dipshit for a decade?”
JT didn’t say anything. She leaned her weight against Ali’s side. “I’m sure he wasn’t such a jackass the whole time.”
Ali considered her words. “Maybe. But he’s always had that side to him. I wish I’d seen it sooner. Or that he’d pull that in front of my mom. Maybe then she’d stop trying to get us back together.”
JT put an arm around Ali’s shoulder. “I cannot wait to kick his ass in the dogsled. He’s going to be such a shitty loser.
Guys like that always are.” She dropped her arm and Ali wished for it back.
She missed the warmth and the feeling that someone was on her side.
But looking around the rink, maybe it wasn’t a terrible idea to keep things between them at least looking like they were only friends.
Ugh, she hated herself for thinking it. But it was so much less complicated if people didn’t ask her a million invasive questions about them.
She knew how it felt to have a town invested in her relationship, and it was nice to have whatever was going on with JT be only for the two of them. At least for now.