12
INTENTIONS we couldn't keep our hands off each other. Things were easier when we were alone and just us two but when it came to being around Ivy and wedding preparations, family and now work, all I could think about was Nate. Picturing his hands, his mouth, all over me. Small glances and teasing comments.
We texted all the time but more so when we were in inappropriate situations, like he was purposely leaving the dirty messages to send when I was at work or with Ivy. He liked a little danger; spamming my phone with the filth of what he wanted to do to me, in detail, when we were alone. They would usually appear when we had meetings with Ivy about the wedding, despite him being on the other side of the room or opposite me at the table.
He loved to watch me react, my body heating up as the uncontrollable blush formed on my cheeks, the subtle bite of my lip, the hint of my nipples hardening or the slight squeeze of my thighs together as my arousal built. He pressed all my buttons but it added to the excitement.
We both had the same day off this week and Nate was sleeping peacefully in my bed, the cover up to his torso, exposing his muscular back as the sunlight crept through the sheer curtains. His perfect curls were still intact even after another wild night, his perfect peaceful features.
I laid beside him, still exposed from our spontaneous 3am session. I watched him sleep, thinking about the many sides of Nate I had seen; the peaceful, innocent sleeper; the over-confident, cocky lawyer; the dominant authority in the bedroom; a playful friend who I trusted with my life; and the goofy family man around his Mum and sister.
“Don't.” he scolded, startling me.
“Don't what?” I laughed.
“Don't have feelings for me,” he said, flinging his eyes open to look at me. A darkness filled them with accompanying fear, the first real emotion of Nate’s fell through the cracks. But why fear?
I knew he didn’t do relationships and I was okay with that, he had no reason to fear me. It's like any real feelings petrified him. For me it was too late, the more time I spent with him the more I began to develop some kind of feelings for him.
“In your dreams! You're not God’s gift to mankind,” I defended. He certainly was, but still.
“You're right, I'm no gift, but I am a God,” he cockily smirked. I playfully hit his back laughing with him, his confidence was something I admired. “I mean what I said though, Gi, I don't do relationships.”
“I know,” I smiled, “and I'm not looking for one. But I can still appreciate that sexy physique and that beautiful face, right?”
This arrangement was another new experience. I did do relationships. That was who I was. But if I wanted Nate, even temporarily, I had to pretend I didn’t want more. Selfish.
“Of course, but I don't want you to fall for me, Gi. I don't want to hurt you like that so I want to be clear about my intentions.”
Nate became very serious, his eyes avoiding my gaze. Like an insecurity was washing over him. I didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable so I responded in the best way I knew how to with him; playfully.
“And what intentions are those?” I asked, intrigued. He lifted himself on his arms and looked at me, he ran his finger along my jawline and down the side of my neck. He swirled it over my nipple before gently grabbing my breast in his hand caressing it. He shuffled his body closer to me so his mouth could meet my neck.
“My intention is to make you feel things no one else can ever make you feel.” He began to press my nipple between his fingers, giving a gentle tug.
“My intention is to give you the best sex you've ever had, or will ever have, in your life,” he said as he moved his mouth over my nipple, flicking it with his tongue.
I let out a small moan which made him chuckle. He ran his hand down under the covers, over my stomach and to the top of my area, teasing me slightly as he placed his teeth around my nipple, just grazing it. My body was heating up at his touch.
“My intention is to fuck you so far into oblivion that you will never ever forget me, you will crave me every second of your life and any future sex you have will be mundane compared to this.”
His promise turned me on and even scared me that this would be all I would get, no matter how much I craved him. Nate was one of those men; fun and temporary. Not the ‘fall in love with, marry, have kids and a white picket fence with’, no matter how much you want it. My breathing picked up, closing my eyes just to focus on his touch, on the here and now.
“Is that a promise?” I asked. I could live with this. I think.
“Oh sweetheart, it's more than a promise,” he chuckled. He then slid his finger down further and started to rub my sensitive spot, his eyes watching me as I relaxed back into the pillow.
I let him play with me however he wanted, relaxing as he trailed kisses on my neck and breasts. Small moans escaped my mouth as he rubbed a little harder. My legs were shaking aggressively beneath him.
“You are so wet, sweetheart.” His heavy breathing in my ear. He trailed kisses down my neck, down my stomach, not stopping until finally, his head was where I wanted it to be. His hands clenched on either side of my thighs, forcing them in place and his tongue caressed my clit. It felt amazing every time he licked, energy sparked around my body, causing it to flinch.
I couldn't help but whimper his name as he woke my body once again. I could hear him mumble as he tasted me, pushing himself harder into me, my hands tugging at his curls as my body shook with no control beneath him. He was ravishing me as if I was the last meal he was ever going to have. His grip tightened as he tried to hold my body still, I trembled so much, breathless, moaning loudly. He was amazing. What that man could do with his tongue, with his hands, just him.
He was right. He made me feel like I never had before. He worshipped my body, my pleasure was his focus every time. He was a drug; the more I had the more I wanted. Just a small hit wasn't enough. I was consumed by his presence. I couldn’t escape him. He made me forget the whole, crappy world. He picked up the pace, circling his tongue in the sensitive spot, hitting it over and over again, causing me to jump every time.
“I'm going to have to tie you down if you keep moving," he teased, catching his breath before diving right back. His fingers came back, exploring me at the same time as eating me. I couldn't control my body anymore. I moaned his name.
“Nate...I’m going to…”
“Don't. You. Dare,” he growled. Closing my eyes, I tried to hold as long as I could. Just as I was on the edge, he stopped.
I was breathless, Nate just grinned at me, knowing he almost had me. Fuck him. His eyes darkened as I laid out in front of him, fully exposed, both of us breathless, his hair in a mess from the chaos of my squirming. I watched him place the tip against me.
“I told you, I am going to fuck you into oblivion,” he promised, pushing himself in slowly, his size making me moan. He seized my wrists, pinning them above my head and holding them there. His mouth crashed to mine as he thrust inside me, knocking the wind out my lungs and stealing it for himself. First slowly and then, as per usual, getting a little rougher. Our bodies fit perfectly together with entangled limbs, he began to moan as he built up speed, he felt amazing.
“Oh, sweetheart, you feel incredible,” he complimented, letting himself relax into it.
“Nate,” I moaned, getting closer.
“Come for me, sweetheart.” He gave me permission. I could tell he was close too.
“Fuck, Gi!" He moaned. We both reached our climax and came at the same time. Both breathless and laughing. He collapsed on the bed next to me and watched me as I caught my breath. It was nice to just lay there and be for a second, watching each other come down from the high.
This was the second moment today I saw Nate vulnerable, that his mask accidently slipped for a moment. As soon as he realised he had gotten too comfortable, he climbed out marching to my bathroom to shower, leaving me feeling like a whore on the bed.
The sex was amazing but the cool down time made me feel cheap. What did I expect? It's not a relationship, he made that clear; it was just sex. Despite that, it didn't make me feel any better, that he would just disappear to shower and not utter a word.
With a sigh, I laid in bed staring at the ceiling while I waited to use my own shower. I wasn't expecting anyone so I was startled by the sound of my doorbell blasting through the apartment. I pulled his baby-blue cotton shirt over my head that luckily covered me, and a pair of my pyjama shorts, to see who was summoning me this morning. No one ever came round without prior arrangements. My heart fluttered in my chest, my anxiety peaked, thinking of the dirty secret I was hiding. I braced myself, opening the door to be met by Ivy. Oh shit.