Chapter 28There is only one me.
TWENTY-EIGHT
There is only one me.
Trace
How I ended up in an intimate conversation with Rochelle the domme? I have no goddamn clue. And as much as I admit I avoided her before, now I don’t want our talk to end.
“I can’t believe the freedom in submission,” I tell her, my gaze moving from her to her partner. He doesn’t speak, and I’ve learned that their dominant and submissive roles span all of their lives, not just in the bedroom. It’s wicked interesting.
“I know, right? Most men don’t want to try it because they hear submissive and they think weak,” she says, using her thumb to stroke her partner’s hand, their fingers woven together.
I nod. “Yeah, that’s definitely how I felt about it. But I realized there’s a certain headspace to it?—”
Deuce’s hand comes down on my shoulder, jerking me back from the convo.
“Excuse me,” I say to Rochelle, turning to face Deuce. “What’s—” His eyes are wide, and his chest is heaving, out of breath. “Is everything okay?” I look him up and down. “Are you all right?”
He swallows. “Don’t freak out,” he starts.
I roll my eyes, panic blooming in my bones. “Oh, okay, because tearing me away by saying ‘don’t freak out’ is a great way to start a calm conversation.”
He bypasses my sarcasm, which has heat spiking up my spine. He never misses an opportunity to talk shit to me. “Someone destroyed your car.”
“Huh?”
“Your car…” He glances through the crowded studio toward the sidewalk and back to me. “It’s fucked up, man. Done for.”
I look around the shop. “Where’s Ivy?”
Deuce shakes his head. “I-I don’t know. Connor was leaving and he came back in, said your car is fucked up, completely destroyed.”
“She left,” Connor says, approaching us from the crowd.
“Thought you were taking off,” Deuce says to him. Connor shakes his head.
“Wanted to make sure Trace is okay,” he says, leveling his gaze on me. “Pretty vicious attack on you, man, are you okay?”
My head spins. “Wait– Ivy left?”
He nods. “I saw Juniper and her getting into a truck out front.”
Why the fuck would Ivy leave her own party? Why would she leave without saying goodbye? But… Why would she leave? It doesn’t make any sense. We were going to go back to my place together, have a romantic night. The celebration of her was only just getting started. I sift a hand through my hair, the back of my neck slick with nervous sweat. My stomach clenches.
“Holy shit,” Connor sputters. I look up and follow his eyes to a man moving through the crowd toward us. A man I know despite all my efforts to unknow him.
“Hey, brother.”
Immediately Deuce steps between us, pressing his hand into the center of my chest, anticipating a lunge. But I don’t move. I just stand there, staring into the eyes of my twin brother, the one I have purposely not seen in over a year.
I don’t have to ask him how he found me. He holds up his phone, my reactivated social media account glaring on his screen, the photo of mine and Ivy’s boots front and center. “You made it easy, brother,” he says, wearing his usual slimy smirk.
I notice that he’s copied my tattoos, his neck and hand matching mine. He’s probably trying to pass himself off as me for pussy, which is par for the course for this pathetic asshole. Derek has shown me that blood doesn’t make family, but loyalty makes family. And he’s not loyal.
“Oh shit,” Jeremy draws out, picking the worst time to appear. “So you were the one making out with the blonde,” he motions this thumb between us, relief softening his features. “I was gonna say, cheating on Ivy is not cool, man,” he says, eyeing me.
“Wait—” I face my twin brother. “You were making out with someone here?”
He tips his head to the side. “White tank, black skirt.”
The four of us follow his orders and find the woman matching his description on the other side of the shop.
“She was a client of mine a few weeks ago,” I say, irritation running through my veins. “I’m going to take a stab and say you let her believe that you’re me?”
His white teeth and broad grin make me sick. I grab his wrist, holding his hand out. Connor, Jeremy, and Deuce stare at it. Releasing him, I stick my hand out, and even though he takes his back without me holding him there, they see it.
“And I’m sure it goes without saying, but I’m gonna say it, I got mine first,” I say to them, earning a scoff from my twin.
“You always were cooler than me,” Derek says with a smile. He can act like he’s being facetious, but I know him. He’s always thought less of himself. Always living in my shadow.
By fucking choice.
Derek was always a lazy, cruel troublemaker who was jealous of everything I did when he had every opportunity I had to make something of himself.
And he did.
He made his life becoming my dark shadow, the one I deny, the one who’s done nothing but trail me and ruin things for me. Derek is the reason my life was turned on its head twice, and he married my first love.
Jeremy claps a hand on my shoulder. “God, though, you do really look like identical twins. I mean, sometimes twins look less alike as the elder?—”
“Elder?” I cock a brow. “I’m thirty-eight and—oh fuck.” My sentence dies on the vine as everything falls into place.
Ivy left.
Derek is here, and he’s using my name to get laid. Or attempt to.
Interrupting my train of thought, my brother says, “I thought you’d like to know, me and Cat got separated. Legally. Getting the big D.”
With my chest tight, I stand there, waiting for it to hit. Happiness. A comment about karmic retribution, something. But I feel absolutely nothing at the news that they aren’t going to make it as a couple. She cheated on me with my identical twin and ruined my ability to trust but still, I feel nothing. Completely indifferent.
“Trace, I think Ivy may’ve—” Deuce starts, but fucking Derek opens his mouth again.
“Who’s Ivy?”
I have his shirt in my fist and his face to mine in less than three seconds, I’m sure of it. “Don’t fucking say her name,” I hiss, spit splatting his stubbled upper lip.
“Why, scared I’ll get another one?” His smile is goading, but I refuse to play into him. I lost years of my life running from what he did. I gave him way too much power. Because if you love someone, you don’t cheat on them.
He’s nothing, and she didn’t love me.
“Because I don’t want you in my life. And she is part of my life, so go the fuck away.” I face Deuce. “Drive me to Ivy’s. Now. Please.”
Derek starts talking but Connor diffuses, stepping between us as Deuce and I take off out the front of the shop.
She’s got it all wrong.
My jaw draws tight as evening nips my ears and nose. Deuce runs out onto the sidewalk after me as I take in the shape of my car.
The blood.
She did this.
I know my Firecracker did this after what she thinks she saw.
I don’t give a rat’s ass about the car.
I care about getting to her and explaining. Turning to Deuce, I say, “Get Derek. Get Derek or she won’t believe me.”
Deuce nods. “It is pretty fucking unbelievable that there are two of you.”
I shake my head. “There is only one me. He’s just the… drug store knockoff.” Ivy flashes through my mind as I look across the street to Goode’s. “Go get him. I need to get to her.”