Chapter 9
“Anders is in a show this weekend. Want to come see it with me?” Gabe stopped by the house earlier to do laundry and we got sucked into season two of Gilmore Girls.
“Uhm… sure. Would that be weird?”
Gabe shrugs. “Why would it be weird?”
I don’t answer before the next episode starts.
I’m young—I should be able to bounce back from a hangover pretty quickly, but we took a lot of shots last night, and I know I look like shit this morning which is not a look I’m going for if I’m going to be seeing Anders multiple times a week. My crazy curls are poking out of my bun and I’m positive last night’s eyeliner is giving racoon chic this morning.
This is why I don’t go out on a Tuesday.
Anders is up at the front of the classroom looking as hot as ever when I walk in. There’s a coffee sitting next to my normal seat, and I don’t know if I’ve ever been as upset to see anything in my entire life.
It smells so good.
I can tell it’s the dark roast from the Coffee Shop and it’s just sitting there taunting me. Hungover me did not have time to go get coffee this morning, and now someone must have set this coffee down to save their seat—my seat—so I guess I’ll sit somewhere else.
I look up and catch Anders watching me. First I was late and now I’m awkwardly standing in the middle of the aisle staring at a coffee cup. I look back at the coffee and take one more inhale, hoping the caffeinated air will somehow work its magic on me, before turning around and finding a different seat. Even from over here, the sweet aroma mocks me, and I can feel myself scowling involuntarily.
Once I’m settled in my new—and I swear, not as comfortable—seat, my brain finally tunes into what Anders is saying. “This is a high energy game of sorts.” Great. “And you want to pass the energy from one person to the next, using full body movements and eye contact. I will start by saying, ‘Zip’ and using my body language to pass the energy to someone in the circle. The next person passes saying ‘Zap’ and then ‘Zop’ before we start back at ‘Zip,’ hence the name ‘Zip, Zap, Zop.’”
If this is the kind of shit we’ll be doing in this class, I definitely will need some espresso.
“Hope you guys had your coffee this morning!” Anders says this while looking pointedly from me to the coffee sitting on the ground. And honestly, I don’t appreciate his taunting. He must know I was out with Gabe last night.
After another awkward second of eye contact, I make a face at him and he huffs in amusement, clapping his hands together. “Everyone circle up.”
I make my way slowly to the stage area, trying to figure out how to play this.
Step. Do I stand near Anders?
Step. Or try to get as far away as possible?
Step. I settle on giving myself distance but that ends up putting me directly across from him in the circle. I can see the deep green of his eyes even from here. He gives me an evil grin before rearing back and pretending to hurl a basketball size ball of energy toward me, yelling “ZIP!” at the top of his lungs.
Excuse me?! It is not even 9:30 a.m.—I’m going to need him to tone it down a bit. I narrow my eyes at him as I “catch” the ball and turn to find someone else in the circle.
“Zap…” I say with as much conviction as I can muster, which is admittedly not much, tossing the pretend energy ball to a blonde girl who looks very excited to be here.
“Keep up the energy!” Anders reminds us while looking directly at me, and I promise I really try to stop the eye roll from happening, but alas, I can only do so much without caffeine in my veins.
The game continues with varying levels of participation from the rest of the students in class. I try to discreetly keep my eye on Anders, finding that I enjoy watching him in his natural habitat.
He moves his body so easily for a relatively big guy. I’m not sure how tall he is, but I’d guess around six foot. Slightly shorter than Gabe, for sure. He’s muscled but not extremely defined. I catch myself staring at the way his biceps move as he tosses pretend balls of energy, acting as if they weigh different amounts each time it comes to him.
I’m watching said bicep when I realize the room has gotten kind of quiet. Looking up, I see Anders’ smug face staring back at me along with a room full of other eyes.
Shit. Caught red-handed checking out the freaking teacher. I mean I don’t see him as a teacher figure but all the freshmen in this intro class have no idea that I actually know Anders. And also, am I still drunk? What is wrong with me?
I fumble my hands around, pretending to catch a ball and preparing to throw it to someone else. “Uhm. Zip?” I guess.
“Eerrrt.” He makes a loud-ass buzzer noise, eyes twinkling. “Wrong, but good guess. It’s okay, it was time to wrap up that exercise anyway. Let’s wind down with three deep breaths. We are going to breathe in through your nose for four, hold it, and then release for four through your mouth. Picture your diaphragm filling and emptying as you do this.” He places his hand near the top of his stomach for emphasis.
We take three deep breaths as a class—the entire time I keep my eyes firmly planted on a piece of tape on the ground to avoid anymore drooling over biceps—and then head back to our seats.
“As I explained on Monday, this class will include a lot of technique and acting exercises, as well as some brief lectures thrown in the mix. If you have any kind of theater background, it will probably be pretty easy for you. That being said, I really want to challenge you to dig deep and find it within yourself to be bold and try new things. This is a safe space.”
I am mesmerized by him. He speaks in front of the class with such confidence, and I’m caught up in the movement of his mouth as he talks. Is that weird? Probably, but I’m in deep at this point.
Sitting back with a sigh, I look around the room and realize that every other girl in this room, and most of the guys, are looking at Anders the same way I just was. There’s a mix of fascination and longing on their faces, and I realize that’s probably how most people look at him.
Anders Olsson: Golden Boy.
Well, fuck. I’ve spent the last six years trying not to be like all of the people in this room, trying to will myself away from Anders’ allure, and it’s all come crashing down in less than a week.
By the end of class, I’ve worked myself into a bad mood. I stuff everything back into my bag and glare angrily at the coffee that no one ever claimed as I walk toward the exit.
Anders’ voice cuts through my anger. “Uh, Rebecca Bardot, could you come see me?”
It never fails to send a shiver down my spine when he calls me “Rebecca.” I slowly turn around and head toward the front of the room, getting death glares from Anders’ admirers along the way.
I give them all a little wave as I go.
Anders finishes up his conversation and waits until everyone has left the room before those piercing green eyes meet mine.
“Baby Bardot, you did great in class today. Though maybe showing up hungover and blatantly ogling the teacher isn’t the best move.”
“I wasn’t ogling you!” I can’t argue with the hungover part though.
“Whatever you say.” His lips tilt up in a smile but a flare of apprehension flashes in his eyes. “Was the coffee too much?” He lifts his chin toward the full to-go cup of coffee that still sits on the ground by my old seat.
“I mean it was pretty distracting having to sit in class and smell my favorite coffee the entire time, especially since I didn”t have time to grab any this morning. And whoever it was for didn’t even show up,” I scoff. I’m exhausted now and I just want to leave and get my own coffee.
He looks down at his shoes and I think this is the most hesitant I’ve ever seen him.
“They did show up, actually…” He squints and looks up toward the ceiling. “It was, uh, it was kind of for you.”
My jaw drops open. Oh my gosh, I’m such an idiot.
“Did… did you buy me coffee?” He nods, gauging my reaction. And underneath that auburn beard, his mouth curls in another cautious smile. “Wow. Um, thank you? You didn’t have to do that.”
“I know. I was trying to use it as a peace offering so that this semester didn’t get off to a weird start, but I think I just made it more weird.” He ponders for a second. “Yeah, I definitely made it more weird.”
“It’s not weird. It’s… it’s sweet. Are you secretly sweet and you’ve been hiding it from me?”
He blows out a breath and turns around while mumbling something that sounds vaguely like, “I’ve been hiding a lot of things from you.”
My brows furrow but before I can ask any more questions, he keeps talking.
“Listen, Gabe invited me to Sunday dinner this weekend. Is that okay with you? I don’t want to invade any more of your space than necessary.”
There’s a lot of my space that I would love Anders to invade. And the brief flash of heat that I might have imagined in his eyes tells me that thought was written across my face.
“Mhmm. Yeah that’s fine. Mom will be ecstatic to have you there. You haven’t been in a while.”
“That’s pretty much what Gabe said but again, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
“And I appreciate that, but I promise I’m fine. I do need to get going though.”
He studies me for a second before apparently deciding he’s okay with this. He nods and then walks over to pick up that damn coffee off the ground.
“Here you go. It’s cold by now but there’s a microwave in the green room you can use to heat it up. And if I try the whole coffee thing again on Friday, you have to promise to actually drink it and not scowl at it for the entire class.”
“I was not scowling.”
“Oh, you were definitely scowling. It was cute.”
My eyes widen. “Right. Okay. Well, see you Sunday, I guess. And Friday obviously…”
He tilts his head and leans up against the back of a chair. Studying me as I walk away, he murmurs, “Bye Bex.”
I wave over my shoulder as I walk out and then immediately pull out my phone.
friend *ship emoji*
Cancel any plans you have for Sunday night. Need you both as a buffer for Bardot family dinner… Gabe is bringing a certain roommate that shall not be named.
Riz
Are we pretending he doesn’t exist now?
Don’t worry. I was planning on being there anyway!
Luci
Ditto! *hug emoji*
I slide my phone into my pocket and walk around for the next fifteen minutes trying to find a green room, finally resigning myself to drinking cold coffee.
Friday morning, a to-go cup of coffee is sitting next to my original seat. I take a sip, savoring the bitter flavor. I would say it warmed me from the inside out, but I think that happened the moment I laid eyes on the coffee, before I even took a sip. Anders just gives me a wink when we make eye contact.
I stay again after class that day, telling myself it’s just to say thank you for the coffee, not at all because I crave being around this man.