Chapter 6
Bastiaan
The little noises Amber makes while she sleeps are so cute, but so distracting.
I want to pull over and watch her sleep, watch her while she dreams. I would love to know what she’s seeing while she’s far away in her dreamland, what she is experiencing that causes her to make those sweet noises and her face to twitch.
I’m glad she’s sleeping; she is exhausted, her mind and body both need rest.
I pull off the road and into the brightly lit service station, following the marks on the forecourt to park in the designated truck bays.
I tilt my head back to stretch my neck out as I turn to look at her.
She is wrapped up in my blanket, facing me, and all I can see of her face is her eyelids and nose.
Christ, this girl makes me smile. I don’t want to wake her up; she looks so peaceful.
However, I can't not wake her up, in case she woke up while I was gone and ended up in a panic attack again. I won’t have that.
I lean toward her and watch her sleeping, and all I want to do is pull her into my arms, to run my hands through her blonde curls.
But, again, my guilt rears its ugly head, so I sit back, pull my hair out of its now loose bun and retie it.
While she’s sleeping, I’ll give Sanne a quick call and fill her in on the situation, not the whole situation, otherwise she’ll worry. I dial her number and listen to the dial tone.
“Why isn’t this a video call? What’s wrong?” She demands before I’ve even had a chance to say ‘hello’.
“I didn’t want to see your face,” I joke in my older brother way.
“Fuck off. Switch to video call.”
“No. I’m not alone. And keep your voice down.”
“Why aren’t you alone, dear brother? Who do you have with you?”
“Urgh, I hate you sometimes,” I say as I switch to a video call.
“Who do you have with you? You know I’ll just keep asking until you tell me,” She taunts, and I do know she’ll do just that.
“Amber,” I whisper.
“The beautiful florist? Let me say hi, I want to see her!” She sounds way too excited and loud.
“She’s asleep. Anyway, that’s why I’m calling. Can you have Abel for a while longer…”
“You want a child-free dirty weekend? You old dog, I didn’t know you still had it in you!” She interrupts me, grinning.
“No. Jesus, Sanne. And keep your voice down. She’s in trouble—potentially—so I’m taking her home to keep her safe. No one will know she’s there, but in case they do, I don’t want Abel anywhere near us.”
“What’s happening? Is she okay? Is she hurt?”
“She’s fine, sister. Well, physically, but she had a panic attack on the ferry from England to France.”
“Fuck. And that’s why she’s sleeping?”
“Yeah, she’s wiped out, she’s fast asleep next to me,” I say glancing over at Amber as she sleeps soundly.
“Bas,” Sanne’s voice breaking on my name, makes me look back at the screen to see her eyes glazed over.
“What’s wrong?”
“I just… I just haven’t seen you look at anyone like that since… Marieke,” she whispers, her voice full of emotion.
“I…” I cough, not knowing what to say to that because she’s wrong. “Yeah, anyway, so can you keep Abel longer?”
She just nods and smiles a watery smile at me.
I try to swallow around the lump in my throat.
Seeing her like that always gets me. We wave at each other and end the call.
All I can think about is what she said. She’s wrong.
She just doesn’t want me to be alone anymore and hopes Amber is the answer to that.
At least that put her off asking about what’s going on, for now anyway.
She’ll be all over me soon enough, wanting to know everything.
This isn’t a long stay stop, so I have to wake up the sleeping beauty next to me. I can’t help but just stare at her. Her small, slightly upturned nose is just peeking out of the blanket, and I have the sudden urge to kiss it.
Jesus, Bas, pull yourself together.
“Amber,” I whisper as I gently squeeze her knee, hoping to not make her wake up with a jolt.
“Hmmm,” she hums sweetly, burrowing into the blanket further as she clutches the seatbelt at her chest.
This girl.
“Liefie, I’m going to get us some food. Do you want to lie down on my bed while I’m at the shop? I’ll lock you in, you’ll be totally secure, and I’ll only be gone a few minutes,” I ask her as I watch her sapphire blue eyes open and focus on me–those eyes. I could spend hours just gazing into them.
Fuck. Come on, Bas, mind on the job.
“Okay, yes, please. I feel like I haven’t slept for a year,” she whispers as she yawns and stretches her arms above her head, making the blanket fall away.
Her shirt rises slightly and shows a delicious slither of bared skin.
Is that a belly button piercing? Oh, fuck.
I wonder if she has anything else pierced.
I would love to run my tongue slowly along that creamy, pale skin, to pull her piercing gently with my teeth and…
NO. No, Bastiaan, we aren’t going there, but I can already feel my dick demanding that we absolutely do go there.
He’s very insistent where Amber is concerned.
Now I’m fucking hard. Great. How am I supposed to walk across the forecourt with a tent in my trousers?
Fuuuuuck.
I stand up and pull my jacket on to try and hide my very impatient friend by slyly pushing him to the side.
“Here, the bedding is clean. Well, cleanish. I’ve only slept on it one night,” I smile at her, watching her look around my home-away-from-home.
“This is so cool, you have everything you need here,” she comments quietly as she sits on my bed, smoothing her hands on the bedding as she takes everything in. She looks so sleepy, so fucking adorable.
“I do, it’s small, but I have everything I need for my days on the road,” I reply watching as she lays her head on my pillow.
Shit. It’s going to smell of her. I’ll have to wash this as soon as we get home, I can't have her scent all over it… and great, my was waning dick is now getting hard. Again. Everything about her makes me hard, but her scent, that Jasmine perfume she wears that mixes with her own unique smell, gets me every fucking time. I feel like I can smell her days after I’ve seen her, I catch her scent in places I know she’s not and its torture. Exquisite torture.
“Is this Abel?” She points at the picture I have pinned next to my bed. He’s smiling after he’d just caught a huge sea bass. That was such a great day, my days with my son always are. Fishing is our favourite thing to do together.
“Yes, that’s my boy,” I say proudly, then remember the picture next to him is of Marieke on our wedding day. It was taken as her mother was doing up the endless silk buttons on the back of her dress. She was smiling at the camera, looking so happy. It’s my favourite picture of her.
“Sorry about that,” I murmur as I reach over and grab the picture, feeling strange about her seeing it. Seeing her.
“Bas, there is nothing to apologise for, truly. I’m just so so grateful that you are keeping me safe during this crazy time in my life.”
“Of course, there was no choice to make. You can stay with me for as long as you need. No ‘thank you’ needed.” We just smile at each other, like this moment has been paused somehow. She is truly beautiful, breathtakingly so.
I stand and pull my eyes away from hers quickly and rub the back of my neck as I clear my throat, feeling awkward as fuck.
Damn, this girl is going through it right now.
She doesn’t need some older guy ogling her, and she especially doesn’t need some guy thinking about her the way I have been.
She deserves more. She deserves everything.
“I’ll be back soon. Any requests?” I ask, not wanting to leave her. It’s like a physical ache in my body, like my body hurts to be separated from her, which is nuts, I’m only going to be gone for five minutes.
She just shakes her head and gives me the sweetest smile as she snuggles into my bed, looking so at home there.
I give her a weird wave as I leave, locking her up safe and secure in my truck.
Why does she turn me into such a dork? I feel like the most uncool guy ever to live when I’m around her, like I have two left feet or something.
At least the cool breeze is calming down my cock, I really don’t need him trying to gain control while she’s here.
Oh God, her scent is going to get all over my whole house.
I’m going to have to deep clean the whole place, or I’ll end up jacking off like a goddamn teenager.
Or I can just ask her to use my soap… Amber smelling like me?
No, that’s even worse, both my dick and I are in agreement on that one.
Amber smelling like me would be the biggest turn-on.
Also, how would I even begin to explain that to her?