Chapter Five
I stirred the stew, thinking about how I didn’t believe in coincidence. Dianus was single, dangerously handsome, and going to be around for the foreseeable future, tracking the deer he’d agreed to research.
He’d gotten past my wards and was perfectly polite. No alarm bells were ringing, and my gut didn’t tell me to run screaming. Hell, the man had helped me decorate and we couldn’t stop finding ways to touch each other. I’d hold his arm while I spoke to him, and he’d kept playing with my hair. It made me giddy. I was glad he’d had to go back to work so I could collect myself.
But there was something about him I couldn’t put my finger on. He seemed uniquely sheltered. Maybe he was a salt of the earth type who didn’t watch the news or travel much. Running with that thought, I found myself nodding. “I mean, he’s not some city boy. He lives in the woods. That’s going to make you a little quirky.”
On second thought, I realized I’d fled here for solace, so I wasn’t sure what that said about me either. “I guess we’ll be weird forest people together,” I murmured, not even fighting the smile.
The truth? I was smitten. Dianus was stunning. Maybe I was foolish to let my past taint my present. Sure, the last two men I’d dated had hurt me, but that didn’t mean I shouldn’t put myself out there again.
But can you really trust a man not to betray you? And do you really deserve happiness after everything you’ve done?
I ceased stirring, plopping the wooden spoon on the counter at the same time a knock thumped on the door.
I let out a small yelp, clutching my chest as I shuffled to fling it open. The snow had finally arrived with a couple of inches already collected on the ground.
Dianus stepped inside, shutting the door and sitting a basket down at his feet. “Shea, are you okay? You look frightened.” His voice was low and filled with concern.
“Yes, I, uh, sorry, the knocking scared me.”
Without warning, he pulled me into his arms, the scent of him flooding my nose. He smelled fucking divine. I couldn’t even pinpoint it. It was spicy and woody, with an undercurrent of something undeniably earthy.
“I can feel your heart racing,” he whispered, moving some of my hair off my shoulder to gently press his knuckles against my neck for my pulse.
It was a daring moment every relationship had where you tested the boundaries on physical touch. A simple call and return if you will. I was so glad he’d made the first move so I could make the emboldened second one. A part of me wanted to melt like putty in his embrace, and another part of me wanted to rip myself away and feign indifference. The former won over and I found myself unzipping his coat and hanging it on the peg next to the door. “You’re so warm,” I said, going back in for the hug, this time with only his wool button-up between us.
He chuckled and wrapped his arms around me, this time tighter. I could tell he needed the contact too with the way his mouth feathered kisses on the top of my head.
“You feel so good, Shea.”
I squeezed him even tighter in response. Sense knocked into me, and I realized I was basically mauling a stranger in my home. Sure, we’d talked a little this afternoon, but I didn’t know this guy that well.
I broke the embrace. “Can I get you a drink? I’m limited on what I have, so your options are water, tea, or mead.”
“Water would be great.” He held up a rustic basket that looked like a step above a bird’s nest, like he’d woven it himself. “I did not come empty-handed.”
“Oh, you shouldn’t have.” I peeked inside, unable to hide my confusion.
“Wild apples,” he explained good-naturedly. “They are even better with some lemon and ginger root. Or in a pie.”
“How lovely.”
“Oh, and some plums.” The dark fruit looked tiny in his large hand.
“Thank you.”
Most men would come to my home with Taco Bell and a stolen Netflix login. This was a far cry from suburbia. I could get used to it.
I ushered him farther inside, plopping the basket on the kitchen counter. When I turned, he was right behind me. Unable to help myself, I babbled on. “Come to think of it, I don’t really eat with people often. I hate my roommate, my family lives far away, and my aunt and uncle are in Upstate New York.”
He brushed some hair off my shoulder. “Well, I hope I am an adequate dinner guest.”
Needing to escape his touch before I pounced on him again, I rounded the counter and filled up a glass of water.
When I leaned over to give it to him, his fingers brushed mine. “Thank you,” he said with an unapologetic gaze at my cleavage.
I took a sip of my cinnamon tea and picked up a ladle, launching into questions about what he did in the winter to stay sane and busy. It was my self-defense in stressful situations—there was nothing people loved talking about more than themselves. Plus, I was trying to piece his story together.
He answered all the questions thoughtfully, seldom giving me a vague answer. We shifted into a comfortable rhythm together, where one of us would tell a story while the other ate, taking turns until we were both finished. Our conversation shifted as we cleaned up in an easy joint effort of me scrubbing and him drying. His honey-colored eyes darted around the cabin as he hung up the towel. “You do not have a tree.”
“Oh, I brought a fake one with me. It’s in my trunk. I just haven’t brought it in.”
“A fake one?”
“Yeah, maybe it’s silly of me, but I feel bad using a real tree.”
“Why is that?”
“I dunno. It’s like this whole tree grew from a seed. It’s all happy with its friends in the forest, and we just hack it down and kill it, and for what? A couple weeks of décor?”
His face lifted with an amused smile.
“Why are you smiling at me like that?”
“Because it is cute. I love that you see it that way.”
“But? I feel like you’re about to tell me something else.”
“But maybe life is worth celebrating? Maybe you should allow yourself to indulge a little.”
I wondered if we were still talking about trees or something else.
He gestured to the lantern hanging on one of the beams. “Say, how about we take that lantern and cut down a tree to bring in?”
“But it’s dark.”
He reached to grab it. When he lifted his arm, the edge of his flannel lifted, showing a taut, V-cut torso. “Hence the light. Besides, I know my way around the forest. I can help you pick out a good tree.”
I guessed he’d be the best person to ask if that was even legal and the safest way to do it. I really shouldn’t pass on his offer. Come to think of it, I felt a little silly. I was surrounded by a forest and had bothered to bring a fake, plastic tree from home.
“Deal. But under one condition.”
“What?”
“You help me decorate it.”
He let out a chuckle. “Deal.”
We dismantled the table to make room. Then we pulled on our coats and hats. He helped me pack in the tree stand and decorations from my car, and I fetched a small saw my uncle kept with the firewood box. As we left the cabin, I could hardly focus on anything but his wide back in front of me and the way he confidently held the lantern up, lighting our way, his footsteps sure as we clomped into the freshly snowy forest.
We didn’t go far, and he really did know where he was going, which was a relief. He’d warn me of a fallen tree or rock before I even saw it.
“Here, take my hand, lovely,” he said in that deep, gravelly, gentle tone of his.
I did, stepping down into a shallow bank in the forest. A few more situations called for assistance, and by the third time, he didn’t bother letting go of my hand, instead squeezing it tighter. I could’ve sworn the whole side of my body tingled, and not from cold.
“This one,” he proclaimed, nodding toward the tree as he lifted the lantern for me to further assess it.
Still hand in hand, we circled it. “You’re not kidding. This really is the perfect tree. It’s not too tall, not too dry. Vivid color, nice shape.”
“I told you.” He rested the lantern on the ground and held up the bottom branches.
I reluctantly let go of his hand to cut the trunk of the pine tree, grateful he didn’t mansplain to me how to do it. I sawed into it with determination, quickly felling the tree. Sparkly snow puffed up when it plopped to the ground.
Much to my surprise, Dianus threw it over his shoulder without so much as a groan. “What?” he asked with a smug look.
“You’re really strong.”
He shrugged, his brawny shadow moving on other pines. “I am around trees a lot. Comes with the territory. Shall we?”
Once inside the cabin, he expertly plopped the tree into the holder, nary a scratch or swear word involved. It was damn impressive.
“Wow, this could’ve gone so differently,” I said with a giggle, plucking some pine needles out of his hair.
“How so?”
“We could’ve argued or poked an eye out. Or broken a window. Instead, you just heaved it in here like it was no big deal.”
He patted the tree, clearly proud of his performance. “What can I say? I am talented using my body.”
“Right.” I cleared my throat at his innocent statement. I was being such a perv. Then I saw the glint in his eye and realized he meant it. I pulled off my beanie and swatted him with it. “Dianus!”
He caught the hat and the hand I held it with, pulling me to him with a sexy smile. Our chests smashed together as he held me to him with his other hand on my lower back. Gazing up at him, all I could think was I loved being in his arms, seeing him this close.
“You look so pretty with your cheeks flushed like this,” he said, sweeping the pad of his thumb over my skin that was undoubtedly pink from the cold. “This color is my new favorite.”
“Is that why you’re always trying to make me blush?”
“Yes,” he admitted, gazing at his thumb stroking my face before locking eyes with me. “But I want to make you flushed for other reasons.”
I leaned in even farther. “And what might those be?”
His hand on my lower back moved, sweeping up and down my side before he gave my hip a quick squeeze. “Oh, I think you already know.” With his wry statement, his eyes flicked to my mouth. I parted my lips, giving him the silent cue. He lowered his mouth to mine, his lips soft and slow. Taking his time, he swept gentle, testing kisses before we moved to something less innocent.
Encircled in his arms, I fisted the front of the coat he was still wearing, needing something to anchor me. Hearing the fabric swish, he broke the kiss and unzipped it to tear it off. I followed suit, both of us tossing the garments on the reading chair behind me before we resumed.
“God, you’re such a good kisser,” I confessed.
Dianus sucked in a ragged breath, pulling away from my affections. “Hmm?” he asked teasingly, forcing me to say it again.
I squeezed his wide shoulders. “I said, god, you’re such a good kisser.”
Something primal and hungry flashed in his eyes as he ate up my praise. “I was going to say the same thing,” he whispered against my lips. He clutched me even closer. “And you smell amazing.” His lips skimmed my neck, brushing soft kisses up to just below my ear. “Like cinnamon and sweetness.”
My fingers found their places in his hair, tangling in the curls to keep him close. His nose trailed up my neck, taking a shameless whiff before his mouth returned to mine. The kiss grew hot quickly, our tongues stroking, breaths mingling in desperate, little moans and groans.
Something evident to me was Dianus didn’t seem turned off in the slightest by my size. He eagerly squeezed and held the parts of me I’d once found shameful—the rolls along my sides, my love handles, my less than toned ass. And when he did, low, growly noises vibrated his chest, pulling me further into a frenzy with him.
How could someone so perfect find me attractive?
Against my belly, I felt him harden. Before I knew it, we were walking backward to the couch.
“Wait.” I pushed at his chest. “I need to stop.”
He tore from me, panting, eyes unfocused in a haze. “As you wish.” He soothingly ran his hands up and down my arms. “Of course.”
“I-I’m just not . . .”
He took both of my hands in his and kissed the tops. “You don’t have to explain yourself, pretty woman.”
My entire body hummed and the dampness in my panties was undeniable. I guessed I stopped because I felt out of control. Something about Dianus made me want to fall to my knees and let him do whatever he wanted with me. Sure, I had been physical with other guys, but none of them had had the same pull.
With a final squeeze of my hands, he dropped them. “I should call it a night.”
I smoothed out my hair, instantly regretting my decision.
He grabbed his coat and made his way to the door, turning to give me one final kiss goodbye.
“Maybe—” I said. “We could finish decorating the tree tomorrow night?”
He flashed me a boyish smile. “I would like that.”
“Perfect. Swing by after work?”
“It is a date.” He pointed to the basket of fruit he’d brought me. “The plums would be delicious in oatmeal if you have it. Promise me you will try them?”
I couldn’t help but smile at this simple request. “I promise.”
He held the back of my neck and brushed a gentle kiss on my forehead. “Good night, Shea.”