Chapter 28
MILES
Miles had spent the entire trip rehearsing their reunion—everything from dropping to his knees and begging Zach for his hand in marriage to playing it cool and letting Zach set the tone. Instead, all he’d managed to do was freak Zach out.
In his defense, he was operating on half a brain.
The moment he laid eyes on Zach in the stairwell, all common sense had departed his body, leaving behind nothing but a large neon sign that flashed Mine over and over.
Frankly, it was a miracle he was still able to carry on a conversation instead of scooping Zach up into his arms and carrying him off to the nearest cave.
He still planned on doing that. After Zach calmed down.
“Are they eloping? Did Max leave the farm?” Zach’s voice was thin but less frantic.
Miles reached out to thread his fingers through Zach’s, relieved to encounter no resistance. He needed to tell Zach everything without dragging it out, but it was difficult, his mind getting sidetracked by how kissable Zach’s lips looked as they pursed in concern.
Reluctantly, he dragged his gaze away and answered the question. “No. They’re getting married at the farm.”
Zach’s eyes widened, gorgeous pools of gray threatening to swallow him, and it took all his willpower to keep from leaning in and pressing their mouths together.
“Miles, I don’t get it,” Zach whispered. “What happened? Last time I talked to Raymond, he was committed to a lifetime of sneaking around and being miserable. A public marriage was not on his bingo card.”
“Yeah, I know—I’m getting there. Stop getting me sidetracked.”
“How am I getting you sidetracked?” Zach’s voice shot up with indignation. “I’m trying to understand! You show up out of nowhere, tell me the star-crossed lovers are getting their unlikely happily ever after, and I’m doing my best to keep up.”
Miles lifted Zach’s hand and kissed his knuckles before responding. “You don’t have to do anything to be distracting. You just…are.”
“Then close your eyes and tell me what’s going on before I lose my mind,” Zach snarked, that lovely spark of energy returning to his glistening eyes.
Miles would do anything to keep that spark alive, to feed it every day, to wake up to Zach’s soft touches and groggy sarcasm.
He didn’t say any of that out loud. Not yet.
Zach was still waiting for him to explain why he was there, and his patience seemed to be wavering.
“Max and Ray are planning their perfect August wedding—their words, not mine. I’m Max’s best man, obviously, and Ray wants you to be his. But,” he tutted, “you keep blocking everyone’s calls, so they had me come ask you in person. And warned me not to take no for an answer.”
“What?” Zach threw his hands up in the air. “Why? I barely even know him! Why would he want me up there?”
“Well, he doesn’t have any family around, and since you were sort of instrumental to the whole wedding thing, he figured—”
“Miles,” Zach said deliberately, a dangerous undertone to his voice. “What in the fucking fuck are you talking about? I left weeks ago. How could I have had anything to do with…anything?”
“It’s a funny story.”
When Zach impatiently gestured for him to continue, Miles threw an arm around his shoulder and pulled him in. “A few weeks ago, we were having dinner, and my mom decided it was peak dinner conversation to announce you’re gay. I guess your mom filled her in?”
“Makes sense.” Zach made a face and shrugged. “It’s not like I expected her to keep it a secret.”
Miles felt immediately lighter. He’d been unsure how Zach would react to finding out he’d been outed to people outside his family.
“So, what happened? Did everyone freak out?” Zach asked, trying to play it off as a joke, though Miles could tell he was genuinely worried.
“Mom and Dad assumed I didn’t know, thinking it was this huge revelation. I told them I’d known for a while, kind of went off about how reactions like theirs were exactly why you didn’t tell anyone.”
“My hero.” Zach smiled and cuddled closer, dropping his head on Miles’s shoulder. “Defending my honor.”
“I might have said some other stuff too.”
“Like what?”
“I might have…” Miles paused. He didn’t know what Zach would think, didn’t know what their future held, or if there would even be a future. He was fairly certain Zach had feelings for him, but that wasn’t a guarantee of a happily ever after.
Still, he had to be honest. He had to lay all his cards on the table and let Zach make the call.
“I told them I loved you.”
He watched Zach closely, but there wasn’t any visible reaction.
Zach didn’t move, didn’t speak—didn’t even let on that he’d heard the confession at all.
Miles resisted the urge to fill the silence, his fingers curling into a fist, his pulse thrumming through him. Had he said it wrong? Did Zach not feel the same?
After what felt like an eternity, Zach lifted his head and raised an eyebrow at him. “That’s it? We’ve been best friends for years. I’m pretty sure they know you love me.”
Despite being one of the most intelligent people Miles knew, his best friend was an idiot.
Miles hooked a finger under Zach’s chin and leaned in until their foreheads touched.
Zach still trembled with the remnants of his earlier fury, but he managed a soft, shaky smile.
Something in that fragile expression made Miles want to wrap himself around Zach, to shield his slight frame from the world and every horrible thing in it.
“Miles?”
His name on Zach’s lips was like a drug, the husky whisper going straight to Miles’s dick.
He swayed with the rush of desire shooting through him.
The faint prickle of Zach’s stubble anchored him to reality, the question in Zach’s eyes reminding him that they were in the middle of a serious conversation.
It wasn’t the right time to carry his man over to the bed and force him to accept as much pleasure as possible.
Was it?
Fuck, Miles hoped the right time was around the corner.
He didn’t know if he could leave, if he was physically capable of getting up and walking out of the apartment after their talk was over.
He would if Zach asked him to. He would do anything for Zach.
But he would also crumple right outside the door, incapable of taking another step away from the love of his life.
And he needed Zach to know that.
“I love you, Zee. I’m in love with you. I want to be with you.
As your best friend, as your lover, as your partner, as anything you need me to be.
That’s what I told them.” Zach’s eyes widened in surprise, and Miles scrambled to clarify.
“Not verbatim! The lover thing was implied, but I didn’t actually say that out loud. ”
A single tear rolled down Zach’s cheek, leaving a shimmering track in its wake. “Did you mean it?”
Instead of answering, Miles leaned in. Slowly, carefully, giving Zach ample opportunity to push him away.
He encountered no resistance. Their lips pressed together, and Zach’s breath hitched. Miles had meant for this to be a soft, simple touch, but as soon as they made contact, Zach opened his mouth and welcomed him in.
The chaste kiss quickly became an inferno. Miles licked into Zach like a starving man. He’d missed the familiar minty sweetness, the vibration of his moans as he fed them to Miles, the hungry way he sucked on Miles’s tongue as if it were his cock.
When the need for air became impossible to ignore, Miles leaned back and threaded his fingers through Zach’s hair, grabbing the roots and pulling his head to the side. He made sure to be gentle, to cause no discomfort. This wasn’t about pain. Only dominance.
It worked. Zach’s gasp of surprise morphed into a pleased moan as he bared his neck in a sign of submission. With his eyes closed, he waited for Miles’s next move, putty in his hands.
“I meant it,” Miles growled and tightened his grip.
He couldn’t hold it back—that dormant part of himself that only came alive with Zach, the primal instinct to make Zach his, to mark him, claim him, destroy him, pleasure him, give him anything he wanted.
When Zach gave him this power, this ultimate control over his body, Miles’s world was reduced to the two of them, and he only had one goal—to be everything Zach needed him to be.
“I will always mean it.”
He descended on Zach’s neck, licking and sucking the creamy skin, scraping his teeth up and down the pulse point. Zach writhed with pleasure, whimpering, tightly clutching the fabric of Miles’s shirt as if afraid to let go.
“I want you,” Miles whispered into his collarbone before biting down, feral with lust. Zach’s loud, reverberating groan let him know he was on the right track. “I fucking love you, Zee.”
There were too many layers between them.
He needed Zach naked, needed to touch him, taste him, make him submit.
He leaned back, ready to rip off their clothes, but the intensity in Zach’s eyes stopped him short.
Lust rolled off him in waves, but there was something else.
Something precious. The same tenderness that cut Miles at his knees whenever he thought of Zach.
“I love you too, Miles.” The tension eased from his muscles as he reached up to cup Miles’s face. “I’ve loved you for so long, none of this feels real. It’s like I’m in a dream, like all of this could go poof at any moment, and it fucking scares me.”
“It doesn’t scare me.” Miles pulled him in, his lips brushing softly against Zach’s temple. Desire simmered under the surface, but he knew they needed to talk first, to get through all of Zach’s fears and concerns.
The next time he dominated Zach, it would be on equal footing. No secrets, no misunderstandings, no anxiety. Just the two of them.
Zach drew back, searching his face. “How can you say that? Two months ago, you were a virgin, and everyone thought you were straight. Now you’ve had sex with a man, come out to your family, and…I don’t even know what happened. Did they kick you out?”