Beatitude (Depraved Muses Department)

EVERLY

SIX

G roaning, I open my eyes, my head throbbing. Looking around the hotel room, I note the almost too-clean smell. Not what I’d expect considering there’s a dead man on the floor. Fuck, a dead man. What is the matter with me? How have I allowed it to get this far? What am I doing? I’ve been responsible for two deaths in as many days and why? Because I get off on a possessive killer wanting me? I shouldn’t be this way. It’s sick. I know it is but, I crave Ronan more than I crave my next breath. It’s something I’ve never felt before, I can’t explain it and it’s terrifying because he has awakened a darkness inside me that I know will never go back to sleep. And I don’t want it to, I want more, I crave more. I want to see how far we can push each other, find our limits and then break through them.

Sitting up, I wince, my body aching from last night. I can’t believe everything that happened. The knife, Ronan taking me from behind, the balcony. I passed out while we had sex on the balcony and I don’t remember coming or him bringing me to the bed. Yet here I am. I’m naked, but I feel clean and I smell like the hotel’s lotion, which I didn’t put on last night. I look around the room, a gasp escaping me when I see the body is gone. There’s no blood, no body, no Ronan. Anxiety fills me as I climb out of bed, stumbling around. His bag is gone.