A Game Of Love (A Forbidden Game #2)

Chapter 23

Tobias

I was an idiot. A complete dumbass.

Here, I’ve wasted so much time worrying about what our parents were going to think about me having feelings for Lilly, and in the end, all they cared about was that we were happy.

I’ve made this whole step-sibling situation such a taboo thing in my mind, letting it eat away at my thoughts and consuming my whole damn head for nothing.

Lilly was right about one thing: I know for a fact that despite her telling me they would accept us, I needed to find out for myself. To hear it from their own mouths.

What pisses me off the most is that I didn’t tell them sooner and save us all the time and trouble. To save Lilly the pain of lying to her parents and keeping this from them.

It wasn’t just the worry of how they would handle things, it was the fact that for the longest time, I thought I was broken and not good enough for Lilly—that my mental health was the deal breaker.

Every session with Gracie, I understood more and more how my own mind and thoughts were the poison. I was self-sabotaging for years.

She assured me it wasn’t my fault and it was something that was largely related to my disorder.

I’m not cured, I’ll never be. This is who I am, it’s how I will always be. Even with my meds, I still find myself having small mood swings from time to time. Mostly, it’s only been after we lost a game.

But true to her word, Lilly was there at my side, talking me down and through it.

She’s really my saving grace. I don’t know what I’d do without her, and I don’t want to find out.

The past few years have been hell, and honestly, I don’t think I'd have survived any more time apart from her.

To get better, you need to want to get better for yourself. And while I did, I don’t think I’d have taken that step if it wasn’t for wanting to get better for Lilly as well. She saved me. I owe her my life.

It’s only been a few days since our parents found out, but even so, it’s felt like a massive weight has been lifted off my shoulders. One less thing to worry about.

Between exams, studying, practice, and games, I’m already stressed out enough as it is.

Thankfully, there aren’t too many side effects to the new meds I started taking a few months ago, but there are days I find myself tired with a stomach ache.

And while I’m a big boy and can take care of myself, Lilly is right there by my side, curled up in bed with me, watching TV or napping.

When I wanted to push through and keep going, she forced me to slow down and take care of myself.

Today is New Year's Eve, and we’re at the hockey house for the last party of the year.

I’m going to be ringing in the new year with my two best friends. One being the love of my life.

I’m happy—no, I’m more than happy. I’m in my own little heaven. And there will always be a part of me that still wants to overthink things, tell myself it’s all too good to be true, and something bad is just around the corner. When that happens I call up Gracie, and she talks me down.

Then I see Lilly’s beautiful face and everything’s right again.

“You know, you're not all that bad.” I look over to see Bianca leaning against the wall next to me.

We’ve been here for a few hours now. I, being the D.D. as always—because I can’t drink with my meds—have been keeping an eye on my lightweight girlfriend. Honestly, I don’t mind. I love seeing her let loose and enjoy herself. And I like being the one to make sure she’s safe and cared for.

Bishop is somewhere around here with the hockey team. Part of me wants to join them, but I’d rather have Lilly where I can see her.

Some things will never change. Like my possessiveness of Lilly. The nightmares might be gone now that I have her in my arms every night to keep them at bay, but that doesn’t mean I don’t find myself thinking of what that monster said.

There are sick people in the world who love to hurt good people for no reason. I won’t let Lilly be one of them. I’d rather fucking die.

“Ah, thanks.” I huff out a laugh. “I think.”

She grins, raising a cup up to her lips and taking a drink. “You’ve done good, Munro. I’m proud of you.”

I’m not sure why her opinion means so much, but it does. Maybe because she’s my best friend's little sister, maybe it’s because she’s my girl's best friend. But I care about her and what she thinks about me.

“Thanks.” I look out to where Lilly is dancing with Jonas. They’re both drunk, doing some really weird dance moves. But they’re laughing and enjoying themselves.

It’s strange to think that the two of them have dated. Clearly, they were meant to be best friends. Part of me was jealous for a while, but then I saw Jonas with Bee and knew I had nothing to worry about.

Ryan, on the other hand, I still don’t like the fucker.

Sure, he’s moved on and seems to have something going on with his buddy Clay and a girl. I mean, there’s been no confirmation, but I’m not blind. I see things. I like to people- watch. That means I know a lot of things others don’t. Like the fact Bee’s drink doesn’t have alcohol in it.

“Not drinking tonight?”

Her eyes snap up to mine. “I am.”

I raise a brow, lip twitching in a smile. “You sure about that.”

She narrows her eyes. “Why are you asking so many questions?”

“I’m not.” I shrug.

“Well, I am drinking,” she mutters, looking back out at Lilly and Jonas.

Snatching the drink from her hand, I take a sip. “Hey!” She goes to snatch it, but I down the rest.

“Yum. I love ginger ale.” I chuckle.

“Okay, I take that back. I hate you.”

“How far along are you?”

Her face pales, lips parting as her eyes grow wide. “I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Does your family know?”

“Toby.” She looks around. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Hey.” I put my hands on her shoulders. “It’s okay. I won’t tell anyone. I just want you to know I’m here for you.” Her eyes fill with tears, lower lip quivering. “Does Lilly know?”

“No,” Bee whispers. “No one does. So, how do you?”

My lips tip into a smile. “I’ve seen Ellie pregnant a few times; I notice the signs. You’ve been moodier than normal. You don’t drink at parties anymore. I find you watching Jonas like you have the biggest secret to tell him, and you look terrified to do it. And well, not to be a creep, but your boobs have gotten bigger.”

She huffs out a watery laugh. “Well, you’re right about one thing. I am terrified to tell him.” She looks over to where Jonas is spinning Lilly around, her head tossed back in a full belly laugh.

“Why? That man adores you and the ground you walk on. I have a feeling he’s going to be thrilled.”

She shakes her head, bringing her sad eyes back to me. “He wants to go to the NHL. Having a baby... it’s only going to ruin that.”

“Why?” I frown. “If it's something he really wants, you both will find a way to make it work.”

“I don’t want to ruin his life,” she whispers.

“I can tell you right now, the only way that would happen is if you left him. Do you want this baby?”

She nods, her hand going to her belly. “More than anything.”

“Then tell him. Let him be there for you, let him love you both. Because I know if it was Lilly, the longer she kept it from me, the more I’d hate myself for not being able to be there for her for every moment.”

“Thanks.” She wraps her arms around me. I hug her back. “I take it back. I don’t hate you.”

Chuckling, I give her a squeeze. “Any time, Bee.”

“You won’t tell Bishop, will you?”

I shake my head. “Not my place to say anything. Plus, if he gets mad at me for knowing and not saying anything, I can always remind him that he’s kept things to himself before, too.”

“You play dirty.” She laughs.

“No, but really. This is your life, Bee. It’s not my place to tell.”

“Thanks,” she says again.

“Come dance!” Lilly shouts, waving us over.

Looking down at Bee, I grin. “You have to tell Lilly after you tell Jonas. She’s going to be your biggest cheerleader. And love that little one with her whole heart.”

“I know.” She laughs, eyes filling with more tears. “That's the part I’m excited for.”

“Come on.” I take Bee’s hand. “Let’s go enjoy this last little bit of a year filled with a lot of things I’d like to forget and start the new one off on good terms.”

Pulling her out to the dance floor, she goes over to Jonas. He pulls her into his arms, tucking his face into her neck and holding her tight. That man is a man in love.

“Hey, you.” Lilly grins up at me. “How are you doing, sexy?”

I bark out a laugh. “Better now that I’m with you.”

While I’m not quite ready to be out to the world just yet, tonight I found myself not really trying to hide it. Lilly and I have always been close. Even before we decided to be something more.

So dancing with her close to me in a sea of people isn’t an odd thing.

The night keeps going. Lilly ends up out back with Bishop, cuddled up on his lap, wearing one of my hoodies.

I’ve been sitting next to them, not wanting to be far from my girl. We laughed and talked with the team about what comes next for us and what the ones who aren’t going to the big leagues are doing with their lives after we graduate.

My plans have changed a bit. Before, I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with my life, but now I know I’d like to stay and be an assistant coach to Jax.

Bishop still wants to open his restaurant. We’ve even been looking at places to buy.

None of them are the right fit, but it’s nice to see his excitement at the first step of making his dream come true.

We plan on travelling this summer, seeing the world. It’s what we plan on doing every summer until Lilly graduates.

My girl wants to run the bookshop with her mom. She decided to take courses to become a preschool teacher as a backup so that she leaves with some sort of degree. She's been talking more and more about wanting to write a book of her own.

She doesn’t think she could do it, that it’s all just a fantasy in her head, but it’s something I know she wants, and I’m going to keep encouraging her.

“I’m going to get some water. Do you want anything?” I ask Bishop. It’s about ten minutes away from twelve, but if I hurry, I can get back, wake Lilly up, who’s sleeping in Bishop’s lap, and sweep her away from the crowd so we can get our New Year's kiss.

“Nah, I’m good. Hurry, though.”

Nodding, I head into the house, straight for the kitchen.

After grabbing a bottle of water, I start to head back outside, but I’m intercepted by Katie.

“Hey, Toby. I’ve been trying to find you all night.” She smiles brightly up at me.

I sigh in annoyance because she’s the last person I want to see right now. It’s been weeks since I’ve seen this woman and months since I’ve talked to her. Not that I have any reason to.

I thought that meant she was leaving me alone. Clearly, I was wrong.

“Why?”

“Because I wanted to see you, that’s why, silly.” She giggles, and the sound makes me cringe.

“Well, you saw me.” I give her a half-ass smile. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go.”

“Wait.” She doesn’t move. “It’s New Year's. Have a little fun. You’ve been glued to Lilly all night. Let her enjoy her time with her boyfriend. Plus, you're going to need someone to kiss when the clock turns twelve.” She gives me a sly grin.

And that sure as fuck won’t be her.

“Listen, Katie, I hope you have a good night, but I do have to go.”

“Toby!” Her face falls, and her little nice act vanishes. “You're being rude. You’ve been ignoring all my texts and calls. What did I do for you to be so mean to me?”

Can’t ignore something you never got. I’ve had her number blocked for a while now. So, anything she’s been doing, I didn’t get. For good reason.

“I don’t want to be mean. But the way you're coming on to me, you're forcing my hand. I don’t know how many times I have to tell you: I’m not interested.”

“It’s because of her, isn’t it?” She scowls, crossing her arms. “It’s kind of pathetic, Toby. Pinning after your sister? It’s gross. And she has a boyfriend. It’s just fucked up. Does he know you’ve been fucking around with his girlfriend behind his back?”

The hairs on the back of my neck stand up. “You don’t know what you're talking about, Katie. So fuck off,” I snarl, my irritation growing by the second.

Katie is a mean girl, a bully, so what she thinks or has to say doesn’t affect me. But for her to imply that Lilly would cheat on Bishop pisses me the fuck off. Lilly isn’t like that. She would never betray the person she loves.

Katie has no idea what's going on, and if she doesn’t keep her mouth shut, I’m going to do what it takes to protect Lilly the best I can.

Would it be shady of me to try and get my father involved? He is the Dean of SVU. He has power. If one of his students was harassing another, I could get her kicked out.

She already blasted Lilly over social media for that video. Something my father has put her on probation for.

“I think you know exactly what I’m talking about. I’ve seen things, Toby. You can deny it all you want. But why are you wasting your time with a taken woman when you could be with someone who wants you? Who would treat you like a king and show you off to the world, not make you their dirty little secret.” She reaches out and trails her fingers up my chest. “That could be me if you just gave me the chance.”

Grabbing her hand, I rip it away from me and toss it to the side. “Don’t fucking touch me,” I growl. “Get this through your fucking head, Katie. I don’t want you. Even if I chose to be with another girl, it wouldn’t be you. So fuck off and leave me, Lilly, and Bishop alone.”

Chest heaving in anger, I step around her and head towards the back door. I swear to god, if I miss my midnight kiss with Lilly, I’m going to fucking lose it.

“You're going to regret this!” Katie shouts after me, but I ignore her, the crowd around us drowning her out.

Grabbing my phone, I check the time. “Fuck,” I curse. Literally two minutes until midnight.

Frantically, I look around the backyard but can’t find them. Where the fuck did they go?

A text pops up from Bishop. Opening it, I read it. It says they're on the swing at the side of the house.

Pocketing my phone, I rush over to them.

As I’m rounding the corner, everyone in the house starts to shout the countdown. Spotting them cuddled together on the swing, I quickly take a seat next to them.

“There you are,” Lilly’s sleepy voice says. “I thought you were going to miss it.”

“Never.” I smile down at her.

“Four. Three. Two. One. Happy New Year!” People cheer all around us.

“Happy New Year, baby.” I lean in and press my lips to my girl, knowing that when we get back to school, I’m not hiding anymore.

As terrified as I am to let the world know, to face the bullshit and messed up comments people are going to have, it needs to be done. I won’t let people think the same thing Katie does, that Lilly is cheating. And I’m not going to hold back and pretend that this girl isn’t mine.

“I love you,” she whispers before tipping her head back so Bishop can get his kiss, too. “And you.”

“We love you too, il mio cuore ,” Bishop murmurs.

“Happy New Year. I’m excited for what's to come.”

“Me too.” I lean my head against her shoulder. And I am. Because getting to live a life with this woman by my side is everything I could have ever asked for.