Back in Blood

2. Lisa

CHAPTER 2

LISA

“This one is really good,” I marveled as I chewed the piece of red velvet cake that I’d just placed in my mouth. I used the plastic fork in my hand to break off another piece. “Oh yeah, this is delicious.” I closed my eyes and groaned. My decision was becoming harder and harder.

One of my best friends Ariyana giggled. “At this point, you’re going to have ten cakes at your reception.”

“No, I’m not,” I sighed. “Sintonio would have a fit.” The cakes that my friend and I were tasting were delicious, but Sintonio didn’t care how good they were. He felt that anything more than $50 for a cake was too much. Especially since I wanted two cakes. Our wedding cake which would be three tiers was $600. The second cake was $200. For the second cake, I was having a hard time choosing between German chocolate and red velvet.

I had a pretty good career as a nurse, and Sintonio made good money with his trucking company. But the year before, he put $30,000 down on a house for us, and I was five months pregnant with our first child. We had a lot going on, and paying an arm and a leg for a wedding wasn’t something that Sin wanted to do. I had been saving for the past six months, and a large portion of the wedding was being paid for by me. But with my dress, the engagement photos, photographer, flowers, DJ, and invitations, the money I’d saved was almost gone. My father gave me $1,500 towards the wedding and hell, that went towards the venue and the open bar. Sintonio would be paying for everything else including the cakes, and if I told him three cakes were $1,000, he’d ask me if I was crazy.

I wouldn’t even be able to blame him because we did have a baby coming. I had already maxed out my credit cards buying a crib, car seat, clothes, etc. As I stated before, Sintonio made great money. But he paid all of the household bills and the note on my Lexus. So when it came to things that I wanted, I liked to buy them myself. We were a team. The wedding was going to cost around $25,000. To me that wasn’t too bad. Ariyana and her husband had dropped almost $100,000 on their wedding. I wasn’t trying to compete or keep up. I just didn’t want my wedding to look cheap and tacky. I liked what I liked, and I didn’t mind working for it. Thankfully, my morning sickness subsided at three months. I ate pretty healthy and made sure to stay hydrated. Taking my supplements and taking care of myself had me feeling pretty good, so I was able to pick up some extra shifts here and there until Sintonio got mad. He felt it was ridiculous for me to be working overtime while pregnant just to pay for an extravagant wedding.

Maybe he didn’t understand, but I had been dreaming of my wedding day since I was in my early twenties, and I was thirty. After kissing a few frogs, I finally found my prince in Sintonio. We’d been together for three years, and he proposed to me two days before I found out I was pregnant. I didn’t mind walking down the aisle pregnant. We would be getting married in two months and going on a four day honey slash baby moon to Cancun.

“Thank you for coming with me,” I hugged Ariyana after deciding to go with the red velvet cake. “Sin has been working extra hours. We’re saving for this baby by any means necessary. I told him when I go back to work, I’ll pay for the baby’s daycare, but I know he’s going to help. He acts like it’s a crime if I want to pay bills.”

“Shit, you better keep him,” Ariyana pursed her lips. “I’m married, and my man damn sure lets me help pay the bills. Let me tell him I don’t have my half of the mortgage, he’ll probably look like he swallowed a rock.”

I giggled because she was right. I loved Brian for Ariyana. He treated her well, and he was a firefighter, but they didn’t get paid the best. She wanted a $400,000 house, and he made it clear to her that in order for them to be comfortable, he’d need her help with the mortgage, and I thought that was fair. Ariyana made great money as a property manager for an apartment complex, and she also had a side hustle doing taxes. Last tax season, she told me she made around $32,000 from just a few months of work.

I got in my car and made my way home, so I could start on dinner. I had the past three days off, and I spent the first two doing absolutely nothing. It would be back to the grind tomorrow, so I had to get caught up on laundry, do some meal prep, and clean my house. In another month, I would start working on the baby’s nursery. I had always wanted three kids and since I was starting kind of late, I knew my kids would be pretty close in age. After the baby was born, I was going to wait eighteen months and start trying for number two. As long as I had baby number three by the age of forty, I was cool.

After putting my ginger tresses in a ponytail, I showered and got started on dinner. I was so in love with the way ginger hair complimented my cinnamon brown complexion that it was my signature color. I hadn’t worn black hair in years. My real hair was dyed ginger and any weave that I put in my hair was the same color. I also never missed a lash appointment. Every two weeks, I was in my lash tech’s chair getting my cat eye wispy lashes filled in because I loved the way lashes accentuated my almond shaped eyes. Prior to me getting pregnant, I was a cool one hundred and thirty pounds, but I’d gained thirteen pounds so far. I wasn’t complaining because most of it was in my booty and thighs. My son was doing my body right.

I had been home for about two hours when Sintonio came in. My man stood 5’10 and though tall men were a turn on for me, I was only 5’6, so it wasn’t like I towered over him. He was on the short side, but he was still taller than me. He had skin the color of butterscotch, and curly hair. When we first met, he was in the gym heavy, and Sin had a six pack. Over the past three years, his face and his belly had rounded out a little, but he was still fine. He claimed after I had the baby, we could start working out together. Gaining weight for him wasn’t hard because he was getting older, and he sat down for most of the day in his truck. Sintonio had been driving trucks for six years, and two years ago, he started his own business. He started off as a one man show, and he had moved up to four trucks and three people driving for him. I was so proud of him.

“Hey, babe. You got it smelling good in here.” He walked over to where I was on the couch and placed a juicy kiss on my lips.

“You want me to fix your plate, or are you going to take a shower first?” Sintonio didn’t necessarily get dirty at work but most days, he liked to shower before he did anything, and that was understandable.

“Let me hit the shower first. You can start fixing it in about twenty minutes.”

“Okay.”

I had a younger sister, Gwen, and an older brother, Malik. I was thirty, and they were twenty-nine and thirty-two. Gwen was cool, but Malik and I were closer than me and Gwen. Nonetheless, Gwen, Malik, Ariyana, and my other best friend, Gemini were my tribe. Ariyana and Gemini were both married, and so was Gwen. None of their marriages were perfect but hell, no marriage was perfect. My parents had been together for forty years, and there were plenty of times I thought they were surely going to part ways. One time they did. My father moved out of the house for ten months but eventually, he went back. Still, they were all married, and I couldn’t wait to be Mrs. Hooks. I loved Sintonio, he was a great provider, and we had good sex. He was romantic, faithful, handsome, and I knew he would be a good father. I couldn’t ask for anything more.

I became so engrossed in a book that I was reading on my kindle, that I forgot to start making his plate in the requested twenty minute time frame. When I heard him moving around in the bedroom, I stood up to go to the kitchen. Sintonio came in the room just as I was grabbing him a bottle of water from the fridge.

“Where are you going?” I asked him when I turned around and saw that he was dressed and smelling good. His favorite cologne permeated the air, and he was clad in jeans, a sweatshirt, and Timberland’s. He’d even put two gold chains and a gold watch on.

“Me and Tay are going to run to his sister’s cookout. I’m not going to be out there long. Maybe two or three hours at the most. My ass is tired.”

“Oh okay. Here you go.” I attempted to keep my tone even because I didn’t want Sin to know that I had an attitude.

He was thirty-two and though he still hung out in lounges and bars, his weekend outings with the fellas had slowed down a lot. I wasn’t that female that always wanted my man up underneath me. He worked hard, and if he wanted to go out and have fun with his friends, he should be able to do that. But I didn’t like Tay. I actually despised him. Whenever I tried to tell my man that he shouldn’t affiliate himself with Tay he looked at me like I was crazy and accused me of nagging. Being pregnant made me extremely emotional, and I didn’t even want to get started up. Tay was bad news. Sintonio had known him since middle school and almost every time trouble found Sin, he was with Tay.

Sin had actually started improving the most when Tay went to prison. It was during that time he got his CDL’s and began driving trucks. He also started saving to buy a house and got on his grown man shit. Sintonio had never really been in the streets but it almost seemed that when he hung with Tay, he had a point to prove. He didn’t live up to his full potential, and that was crazy to me. Tay had been home from prison for a year, and nothing had changed aside from the fact that he went in skinny and came out muscular. He still didn’t have a job, still did dumb shit, and still wanted to be a gangster at his big ass age. The weekend before, he had to do a seventy-two hour hold in the county jail for a domestic violence incident between him and his girlfriend. Some things would never change, and Tay was one of them.

But was I going to remind Sin that he had a fiancée and a baby on the way? Nope. Because he knew that already. Though I tried to respond to him in a normal tone and I had a forced smile on my face, Sintonio knew me.

“Don’t be like that, Lisa. I’m not a kid. I don’t succumb to peer pressure. Tay can’t make me do anything. I hang with him because that’s my homie. I’m one of the few friends he has left that isn’t dead or in jail. I’m not gon’ turn my back on him because we walk different paths.”

“I haven’t said a word, dear.” I forced another tight smile and left the room. A few months after Tay was released from prison, he asked Sintonio if he could borrow $2,000 and when Sin told him he didn’t have it to spare, Tay didn’t speak to him for three months. That nigga wasn’t anyone’s friend; he was a bum.

I was going to keep my thoughts to myself. Tay was the last thing that I wanted to argue about. Curling back up on the couch, I grabbed my kindle and resumed my book. Sintonio was about to be someone’s husband and father. I could only hope and pray that he was out in the streets acting like it.

The next morning, I didn’t even realize the nurse had wrapped her arms around me to console me until I was almost choking from the smell of her perfume. The doctor had stopped speaking so I could bawl hysterically in peace. The words, Ring Chromosome Disorder just kept repeating in my head over and over on a continuous loop. My doctor had really looked me in the face and told me that my son had a rare disorder that might cause him to die in utero or to not even make it through childbirth. And by some chance if he did survive, he would more than likely have developmental delays, learning disabilities, hearing loss, and possibly even seizures among a list of other things. I tried to remain positive through the news but when he mentioned that I might want to terminate the pregnancy I lost it.

Hands down, it was the worst day of my life and to make matters even worse, a stranger had to console me because Sintonio wasn’t there. When I woke up at four a.m. and he wasn’t home, anger coursed through my veins. But it didn’t take long for that anger to turn to fear. I didn’t like Tay. I also didn’t feel like he was the best person for Sintonio to surround himself with, but no one could make a grown man stay out that late. If he was out, he was out by choice, and Sintonio just didn’t move like that. So, fear took over. I called his phone, and when he didn’t answer, my heart sank into my belly. What if something had happened to him?

Being a nurse, made me very aware of just how many people got into accidents or were hurt in other ways and brought into the ER while their loved ones didn’t have a clue where they were. Just as I was about to call him again, I could hear the garage door lifting, and the worry disappeared like a puff of magic. So, he was okay? Yeap, I was angry again. I scurried from bed to use the bathroom because I didn’t want to have to pause from cursing his ass out to take a potty break. As I was washing my hands, I heard Sintonio walk into the bedroom. My lips had parted before I even entered the room fully but one look at his face made me clamp my mouth shut. Sin looked like shit. His red-rimmed eyes were low, and he looked sad. Defeated. Weary. Just as the fear had dissipated, the anger did too.

“Sintonio, what’s wrong?” I asked with furrowed brows.

“It’s been a long ass night. I just need to get some sleep. A bunch of bullshit, really,” he mumbled.

I stared at him with my left brow cocked. He was going to have to come better than that. Sin already appeared to be stressed, and I didn’t want to add to that, but I needed to know what was going on. “Can you just give me a brief run-down of why you look like you’ve been crying, and why you were out until four in the morning?” I asked in a nonconfrontational tone.

Pushing out a frustrated sigh, Sin ran a hand down his face. “Tay got into some shit at the cookout. Three niggas jumped him, and shit got crazy after that. I had to take him home to grab some clothes and shit, and then I took him to his people’s house out in the country, and got a flat tire on the way. It took Triple A damn near an hour to come. I’m agitated, and I just want to take a shower and go to bed.”

Something was up, and it was more than he’d told me. Sin wouldn’t even look me in my eyes while he spoke. He put everything on Tay, but something had happened to him as well. It had to. The way he was looking was a mixture of guilt, fear, and stress. I really wasn’t in the mood to play guessing games. Any time I spoke about Tay being bad news, Sintonio made me feel like I was tripping. Stress was one thing I refused to indulge in during my pregnancy. My blood pressure had already been elevated at my last appointment. As badly as I wanted answers, my son came first, so I let the conversation go. The moment I eased back into bed, Sintonio began removing his jewelry. He went to the bathroom to shower, and I closed my eyes. I’d get to the bottom of the situation later but for the moment, he was home safe and sound, and that was all that mattered.

Livid wasn’t even the word to explain how I felt when Sin refused to get up and accompany me to the doctor. He didn’t even go to work. Because he got in late and didn’t want to get up, he didn’t go to work, nor did he come with me to my appointment. I would have liked for him to be at every one, but I understood that he had to work. Still, he’d missed the last appointment. I felt he could at least make them every other month. So, I already wasn’t in the best mood when I entered the office, but I smiled the moment I heard my son’s heartbeat. My nerves became unsettled when the doctor took extra time with the ultrasound. It was as if he was looking for something in particular, and he kept whispering with the nurse. Just as my heart began to beat double time, he gave me a solemn smile and eased the ultrasound device from my vagina.

Once I sat up, he explained to me what they found in my blood work from a previous visit and what he saw on the ultrasound. My world shattered piece by piece the more he talked. I kept trying to get myself together, but the tears wouldn’t stop coming. Finally, I left the appointment with my head reeling. Terminating my pregnancy wasn’t an option. I’d never do that, but was it selfish of me? I just wanted my son. I didn’t care what the issue might be, but what if he had a poor quality of life? If he survived. Knowing that my child didn’t have a promising future hurt so bad. As a nurse, I dealt with loss and unique situations every day, but it was different when it was at your front door.

With fresh tears streaming down my face and dripping off my chin, I sat in my car in the parking lot of my doctor’s office and cried some more. Ariyana called me, and that made me cry harder. She couldn’t understand anything that I was saying, and that alarmed her. I managed to get out the address of where I was, and she didn’t hesitate to pull up. The moment she hugged me more tears came. I released some more, and then we sat in my car while she held my hand.

“I’m going to get my aunt to come by if that’s okay with you. I want her to pray for you. Is that okay?”

All I could do was nod. I wasn’t in the position to be turning down any prayer. I had seen Ariyana’s aunt in action, and she was the real deal. When the Holy Spirit jumped in her, she would speak in tongues, shout, cry, and even pass out sometimes. I knew her well enough to know that it wasn’t an act. She was anointed for sure, and I just needed her to touch me.

“You want to leave your car here? I’ll drive you home.”

I was a complete mess. As Ariyana drove, I stared out of the window. I didn’t know what to do. Did I get a second opinion? Did I fix up the nursery, did I not fix up the nursery? Did I buy more baby things? What the fuck was I supposed to do? When Ariyana pulled into my driveway, and I saw Sin’s car, I wasn’t sure if I should be angry or relieved.

“You want me to come in?”

My eyes were so dry it felt like sand was in them. I also had a terrible headache. A small smile was all I could offer my friend. “No, thank you. I’m going to go inside and break the news to Sin. Thank you so much for all you did. Just text me when your aunt is on the way.”

“You never have to thank me for that.”

I got out of her car and ambled towards my front door feeling like my legs were made of lead. My entire body felt heavy and weighed down. I would handle anything that came with my son as long as he survived. I didn’t want to lose him. The moment I stepped into the living room and saw Sin with his hands in a praying position bouncing his legs anxiously, I knew that whatever had happened with Tay was some bullshit that didn’t end last night. We locked eyes, and my swollen tear-streaked face made Sin jump up.

“What’s wrong? Why have you been crying?”

His eyes darted back and forth across my face as he waited for an answer. I didn’t possess the energy to stand, so I walked over to the couch and pushed out a deep breath before I explained what the doctor said.

“Fuck!” Sin roared. He started pacing back and forth. “I don’t need this shit right now!”

With a scowl on my face, I recoiled from his words. “What do you mean you don’t need this shit right now? As if any of us do. What happened last night? Why are you acting so jumpy and nervous?” I snapped. I needed to be strong for my child, and I needed Sin to be strong for me. The shit he’d just said was real selfish sounding, and I needed him to fix it.

“Listen,” he stopped pacing. Sin paused for a moment then kissed his teeth. “Fuck,” he groaned and sat down on the couch placing his head in his hands.

My patience was wearing thin. My priority was my child. Whatever had him acting all dramatic and jumpy he needed to figure it out because we didn’t have room for bullshit.

“Yesterday when Tay got jumped, I tried to break the fight up. I guess the niggas thought I was jumping in the fight, and one of them hit me. They were deep as hell out there. A few of them started jumping me. I got away from them and went to my car. I was only supposed to shoot up in the air. I wasn’t trying to hit anybody.”

I couldn’t breathe. My chest was so tight, I ran my hand back and forth over it roughly as if that would soothe the discomfort and make it so that I could breathe again. The first time I tried to speak, no words came out prompting me to clear my throat and try again.

“Who did you hit?” I rasped.

Sintonio went back to pacing back and forth. I wanted to jump up and slap the shit out of him. The stress he was causing me wasn’t fair. I had enough going on. Had he just listened to me and stopped hanging out with Tay…

“This shit is bad,” he mumbled. “I don’t know if anyone dropped my name. I need to pack a bag and be out for a few days. You can come with me.” Sintonio never stopped walking as he mumbled a bunch of nonsense.

My chest caved. “You need to leave? What about me? What about the baby? I can’t just up and leave with you. Who did you hit?” It felt like the room was spinning. My blood pressure had to be sky high.

“A little girl man. I hit a little girl.”

My entire world went dark.