Back in the Saddle (Diamond Firetail Farm)

Chapter 13

13

Ciaron

W hen Lorraine left, I followed Taylor to our room. One night later and it still felt weird. Normally, we’d brush past each other as we got ready for bed. Now we stood in the doorway staring into the space.

“Do you want to shower in here?” I asked. “I can go to the other bathroom.”

“OK. Thanks.”

I moved past her. “Just let me grab my toothbrush.”

I went into the ensuite. When I came out, Taylor was standing just outside with her PJs in hand. She gave me a small smile as I walked past. This was so bloody awkward. It’s like we were two strangers living in the same house.

I hopped into the shower and turned the hourglass timer I’d put in there for the kids. We were in drought and twenty-minute showers were not acceptable.

I needed to start considering how Taylor was feeling in our darkest days too. I know I felt lonely, but she probably did as well. And isolated. Why the hell couldn’t she have just listened when I’d tried to speak to her? Maybe even worked less and helped me with the kids? It was like I was a single parent before I was even a single parent.

I rested my hand against the wall as the water spilled down my back. Taylor was in the shower a few rooms away, naked, water cascading over her curves. I knew what every one of them looked like. What they felt like. We’d showered many times together, touching, tasting, fucking. My fingers twitched, remembering what they felt like. Fuck. I wanted her in every way possible.

My other hand wrapped around my dick. Images of me taking her flicked through my mind. Us on top of a haystack. In the river. Her riding me in the office. In the barn. More and more. I paused on our first time. The morning after we met.

Taylor snuggled up closer to me as the morning sun filtered in the hotel window. So close, there was no space between us, from our shoulders to our ankles. My lips brushed her neck. She sighed in response.

“Good morning,” I said.

She pushed her butt against my hardness. “Seems like you’re ready to show me a good time.”

A jolt of energy pulsated through me. “Are you ready?”

“Show me what you got, Irish Boy.”

I reached my hand up and brushed her hair away before suckling on her neck. I ran my hand down her side, her waist, her hip, and found the hem of her sleep top. My fingers tingled, almost shook, as they touched her bare skin. I found her breast and squeezed. Her breath faltered ever so slightly. I pinched her hard nipple and was rewarded with a small moan.

I paid the same attention to her other breast. Her back arched, pushing her butt into my hard on again. I nibbled on her earlobe as my hand skimmed the skin of her stomach before reaching into her pants and underwear. Taylor opened her legs as my fingers travelled through her wetness.

My hand was restricted by her underwear. Fuck it. I pulled my hand out and grabbed her PJs and undies and tugged them down. Taylor rolled onto her back and kicked them off.

“Take your top off,” I demanded.

She did.

I pulled the bedcovers down so I could see her naked before me. Her legs and arms were tanned and her torso a milky cream. There was a small round birthmark on her hip. Her breasts fell slightly to the sides. Holy fuck. I wanted to touch her everywhere, kiss her everywhere.

I tore my t-shirt off and my underwear wasn’t far behind. She raked her eyes across my body and wet her lips. My heart thumped in my chest as we stared at each other.

I was supposed to be showing her a good time instead of getting my rocks off just staring at her. My hand returned to her slick folds. I lowered my lips to hers and swept my tongue across the seam. Her lips parted and invited me in. Our tongues met stroke for stroke, and my fingers matched the movement.

I pushed her legs open with my hand and she opened them wider. I slipped two fingers in and pumped. Our mouths disengaged as she let out a moan. I slid my fingers out and found her clit. She was so fucking wet. I circled her clit and rubbed it, all the while watching her face to see what she liked best. When I figured out exactly what she wanted, my fingers were relentless as I drove her to the edge.

She bent her legs up and forced her feet into the mattress. It dipped slightly at my knees. Taylor’s breaths were haggard.

“I’m going to make you come so fucking hard the whole bed will shake.”

Taylor threw her head back and cried out. My fingers slowed, coaxing her.

“Come for me, Taylor. Come all over my hand.”

Her legs shook.

“Later it will be in my mouth. I want to taste you so bad.”

She cried out my name as her whole body shuddered. I slowed my fingers more and her tremors matched the movements. The bed shook beneath us.

Good time, achieved.

As her breathing returned to normal, I scrambled for a condom. I needed to be inside her so bad. I needed to feel her warm tightness around my dick. I rolled it on as fast as I could and moved in between her legs. I gazed into her eyes to make sure she was ready. A small smile lifted her lips.

I pushed in centimetre by centimetre. She tensed beneath me and her mouth opened into an O. But she didn’t tell me to stop. I pushed myself all the way in and out, lubricating my length.

Taylor shifted below me, changing position and bending her legs so she could take me deeper. With every stroke a ball of tension built inside me.

“Harder,” she said.

I thrust. The tension built. I adjusted my hips. Taylor let out a small whimper.

I pulled back a little.

“Don’t stop,” she begged. She gripped my shoulders. I drove into her. She squeezed her pussy around my dick and held the pressure.

“Holy fuck,” I grunted.

Taylor cried out. Her hold on my shoulders tightened. My whole body shuddered as my balls clenched and released. The tension let go in a burst and I exploded inside her. There was no more pumping as a growl escaped from my throat.

Our chests heaved against each other as I stared down at her. The hair at her temples was wet and her face was flushed. My whole body was flushed.

“That was the best fucking sex I’ve ever had,” I said.

Taylor nodded and smiled. “You lived up to your promise to show me a good time.”

“That promise is for the rest of our lives.”

My hand stilled as I exploded in it, thinking about her loud cry. I grunted as I emptied myself out. I stood straight and let the water cleanse me before turning the shower off. The timer filtered its last grains of sand into the bottom glass as I glanced at it. Ha. Good timing.

As I dried myself, I realised my mistake. Pleasuring myself with my hand wasn’t it. The fact that I’d left my PJs in our bedroom was. Now I’d have to go back there in nothing but a towel and get dressed in front of Taylor. Even as I walked down the hallway, and the cold air prickled my skin I felt nothing but heat rush through my body. This was ridiculous. We were still married, being naked in front of each other was natural. Except now it was anything but.

I opened the door and scanned the room. Taylor was in bed, looking at her phone. I traipsed to the bed, letting the towel drop when I got there. How would she react to my brazenness? Taylor stiffened and her eyes widened, but she didn’t move her head or eyes in my direction. She didn’t move them away either. I don’t know if I could have been that nonchalant if she was naked near me.

I got dressed into my PJs and slid into bed beside her. Her warmth radiated towards me. She was so close but untouchable. Memories of our first time together flooded my mind, and my whole body ached with want, with need. I wished I could hold her like I had afterwards. If I hadn’t already been in love with her before we’d had sex, I certainly was after.

Would sex even kill the tension between us? My fingers twitched, wanting to reach for her, to touch her, feel her succumb to that touch. Every inch between us felt like another mile in a horse race. The finish post stretching further away even though it was within reach.

Taylor put her phone away and turned off the lamp. “Goodnight, Ciaron.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Goodnight.”

And there went another night without any intimacy. We weren’t ready for that. My brain understood, but my heart wanted it so bad. My skin craved her touch. But we still had issues to work through, and we had to prove ourselves to each other. It wouldn’t be as easy as facing her father this time.

I lay on my back and closed my eyes, listening to her soft breathing. I’d promised the rest of our lives. And I still wanted it. Time to work a little harder on forgiveness and acceptance and loving the shit out of her. And figuring out my part in this mess.