12. Lauren
LAUREN
U p until his lips touched hers, Lauren didn’t really think Finn would kiss her. Guys like him definitely didn’t go for girls like her, particularly when she’d been living in a cabin without running water for a couple of weeks. And especially because he was supposed to take her to jail. Did he expect her to sleep with him so she could maybe change his mind? Would he…trade?
It felt awful to even consider it. She really didn’t want to think that Finn would want something like that.
But then his hand slid into her hair and he slanted his mouth against hers and she melted. He didn’t demand anything from her. He offered. He coaxed. He teased. Lauren found herself leaning into his chest, closing her eyes and kissing him back. She wanted him. Even if it wasn’t for very long.
His tongue slid along the seam of her mouth and she sighed, opening to him. He felt warm and solid and real. Strong. Capable. Like an anchor in the rough seas that swamped her every day practically since she’d been born. Lauren tentatively pressed closer, a fire kindling low in her stomach as his hand slid down to cup her ass.
He made a grumbly, masculine sound and broke the kiss to trail fire across her cheek and down her throat, then back up to the soft spot behind her ear. Lauren leaned back to give him more real estate to work with, and he obliged in the most delicious way. She could lose herself in him. She touched his face and moved her hands through his wild hair.
Finn smiled against her throat, stroking her back under the many shirts she wore. Calluses and hard work left his hands rough, but wonderfully warm. Lauren didn’t know whether she wanted to move to her back and drag him on top of her, or push him down so she could straddle him instead. With his leg still messed up, obviously it would be better for her to get on top, but the logistics of removing pants made her hesitate. That and her needing to find the courage to just hop on him and take his…
“Lauren,” he murmured, nibbling on her earlobe. “Come back.”
“I… I…didn’t…” she started, fumbling for sanity as the gentle pressure of his mouth sent shivers of excitement through every inch of her.
Finn grumbled again and bumped his nose to hers. “No need to think. Just feel.”
He was right. She did overthink things. Everyone always said she did. But when she acted without thinking and jumped in feet-first…that was how she ended up charged with arson and attempted murder. How the heck did anyone know how much thinking was enough and how much thinking was too much?
His thumb dragged over her nipple and she jumped, gripping his hair.
He smiled lazily. “There we are. What else are you hiding from me?”
And that jerked her back to reality. What else she was hiding from him. He had no idea. Or maybe he did, if he read the charges and saw the pictures after the fire.
Lauren shrank back, suddenly disoriented and panicked. What was she doing? She didn’t know this guy at all! He’d been naked in the forest less than a day before and suddenly she ended up in bed with him, kissing and rolling around? And she’d been thinking of actually sleeping with him. Something had gone wrong in her head. The stress of being chased down and found, combined with the exhaustion of hauling him down the trail, had stolen what remained of her good sense.
Finn stilled but didn’t move his hand. “Something wrong?”
“Yes,” she said. “I mean, no. I don’t know. I should… I need to…”
“Okay,” he said. Finn retreated slowly, giving her plenty of space, and him being so considerate made her want to cry. He definitely wasn’t like all the other men she’d dated. Why did he have to be a bounty hunter? Why did he have to be the one who would take her to jail? Why couldn’t she have found him years ago the normal way, like in a bar?
He stayed on his side to watch her, pale brown eyes concerned. “I’m sorry, Lauren, I didn’t mean to…”
“It’s okay,” she said as brightly as possible. Lauren got to her feet and managed to stay there. Heat flushed through her from embarrassment, then cold followed right after as the breeze whistled through the hole in the roof. She retrieved another shirt to put on, and fumbled with her boots as she hopped over to the kitchen. “Just, uh, adrenaline and morning crazies.”
“Morning crazies?”
“What my mom called it when she woke up and didn’t have anything to drink or shoot up.” Lauren winced as she said it. She hadn’t meant to be so honest. And she didn’t need him to pity her. Lauren cleared her throat. “I mean, when you wake up out of sorts because you don’t remember where you went to sleep or who else…who else was there.”
It kept sounding worse and worse. How many normal people woke up without remembering where they were or who else shared the bed? She swallowed a groan and got close enough to retrieve some of the protein bars from his pack, tossing them onto the mattress next to him. “There you go. I just need to…take a minute,” and she waved in the general direction of the door.
Finn still watched her carefully, tense like he meant to launch after her. “Okay. Just call if you need anything.”
“Right. Of course.” Lauren attempted another smile, knew she failed miserably based on his expression, and slid outside before she lost her mind.
The cold morning air didn’t knock any sense into her and she turned in a circle, searching for a way to escape the intensity of emotion and anxiety inside the cabin. Lauren gulped and squeezed her eyes shut. Maybe if she wished hard enough, everything would be different and she would wake up somewhere else, as someone else. Anyone else. Anyone but Lauren Tucker.
Her chest hurt and she couldn’t take a good breath. The sky remained cloudy and cold, and she thought she saw snowflakes drifting down through the trees. Nothing would get better. If the weather turned, she’d be stuck at the cabin with Finn and she wouldn’t be able to resist him. She’d throw herself at him and be an embarrassing mess.
Lauren covered her face and groaned. She’d rejected him after he kissed her. How the hell would she walk back into the cabin and face him for another moment? Would he even look at her? Men didn’t take rejection well. Even though nothing he’d done seemed to hint he’d take what he wanted whether she offered or not, but…you never knew. She’d been wrong before.
Her heart dropped and she stared at the trees, though she didn’t see them. Yet another thing that Lauren Tucker screwed up. Couldn’t even kiss a willing guy in bed and follow through. She stumbled around to the back of the cabin where she’d made a deep hole for a bathroom while the weather was tolerable, since the pump toilet in the cabin was a pain in the ass to use and she didn’t have the strength of will to actually face Finn.
And then she hunted for firewood as an excuse to not face the good-looking man who probably laughed at her for being a ridiculous loser.