Constantine: Britain’s Story Part 2 (Spearhead Lake)

Chapter 16

Britain

It wasn’t an ‘I love you,’ per se, but it definitely had the same effect. My cheeks heat and I don’t know what to say. Do I love him? I don’t know that we’re in love…yet. I think we could get there. I’m debating how to respond when he interrupts me.

“Don’t say anything back. I just wanted you to know that.” I don’t say anything back. I just nod and he pulls back to look me in the eyes, rubbing his thumb across my cheekbone before placing a gentle kiss on my forehead. “God, that was better than I imagined,” he laughs slightly, “better than I remembered.”

I smile, like he took the words right out of my mouth. “I thought it was better than I remembered, too.” He slides out of me, leaving a trail of his cum down my thigh, and the thought of that alone has me wanting him again. Matthias moves back, but doesn’t move off me just yet. He drops a kiss to my belly, lets out a chuckle, and rolls off the bed towards the bathroom, so I follow right behind him to pee and clean up.

When I get back to his room, he’s pushed the duvet back up and is sitting, waiting for me on the edge of the bed with the tee he lent me hanging from a hand. I stand in front of him, between his legs, and he drops the t-shirt down over my body.

“Can I get you some water? You didn’t really eat anything. Do you want me to order something?”

“Are you hungry?” I ask, but he tilts his head down at me, giving me ‘the look.’ “Alright, fine, yes. I’m not super hungry, but I should probably eat.” I only got two bites of my baklava sundae and no bites of real food. The last thing I ate was a chicken salad at noon. “What time is it even?”

“It’s five after eight,” he replies. I laugh.

“Oh, how things have changed. It’s 8:00 P.M. on Saturday night and we’ve already gone out, come home, had sex, and are ready for a midnight snack.” He laughs, too.

“I told you I was old now, babe. I think I picked you up at 8:00 for our first date. Do you remember that?” He strokes my arms since I’m still standing between his legs and I brace my hands on his thighs as he does.

“I do remember it,” I say.

“Did you ever think about me, over the years?”

My cheeks turn hot. Do I tell him the truth? Yeah, I was basically obsessed with you until…Liam. No, don’t think so, but I also can’t lie. My red cheeks are definitely giving me away. He smiles, knowing.

“Yes, I did. Did you? Think about me?”

He nods. “I thought about you a lot. Too much probably.” He reaches up to brush hair out of my face, then continues, “I even went as far as tracking you down…and there may have been Google searches over the years.” My cheeks have definitely gone full Flaming Hot Cheeto now. Matthias Scala Googled me?

“Well, I can admit I never Googled you. I was always worried I’d see some news article that said you'd married a supermodel or something.” I laugh. He doesn’t.

“About that…” wait, what?

I whisper, “Are you married to a supermodel?” Now he does laugh.

“No, sweetheart. That’s not where I was going with that.” He pulls me into him, tighter, forcing my arms up and around his neck, then he lifts me to sit on his lap. “I was going to tell you that I actually haven’t been with anyone since we broke up. Well, as in a relationship. I haven’t been in a relationship with anyone for the last, you know, 17 years.” He shrugs, but I’m so astonished I can barely move. I just stare at him.

“Like haven’t been with anyone in a serious relationship, like not even sexually?” I don’t know if I could believe he hasn’t been with anyone, period.

“No, I-I’ve had sex, I just haven’t been in any relationships.” He laughs a little, “You’re the first woman I’ve even brought here.” He motions with his hand around his room.

“Really?” I ask, with a corny smile on my face. He blushes.

“Yes, really.”

I lean forward and kiss him. One of our kisses. The kind that could go on for hours, that lives in my head for days, but I pull away before we get too caught up. I have to ask. “Is this why you were so determined to tell everyone we were together?” He looks down, almost ashamed.

“I mean, that’s part of it. I just really…” He stops, then regains his composure, “Yes, I want everyone to know you’re with me. Yes, it’s been awhile since I’ve done the relationship thing, and I’m still trying to figure it all out. Yes, I am going to get it wrong. Like I did at your house the other day or like when I planned the trip without talking to you. And again, like I did tonight. I’m sorry, Brit. You’re the only thing I’ve ever done right, so if you need there to not be a label, we will not have a label. But to me, we are together. I am committed to you. I probably always have been. I’m happy to wait for you to catch up. I mean, hopefully, you will catch up,” he sighs out, then looks at me.

“I think I could be convinced to have a label. Now. I wasn’t when you started telling people, but I do appreciate you explaining where you’re coming from. Next time, can you not steamroll me, though? That’s something my ex-husband did to me and it drives me crazy, and it hurts my feelings.”

“I promise I won’t. I care about you so much, Brit. I don’t think you have a clue, do you?” He searches my face for the answer, holding my chin in his hand to look at me.

“I’m starting to understand,” I say back to him quietly.

“Okay, so does this mean I can call you my girlfriend?” I blush and nod. While I may not be hundred percent ready for this next step, I know Matthias is and I want to give him this chance. He’s deserving of this chance. “Great. What can I get my girlfriend for dinner? Do you want Chinese, Greek, Kebab?” I go to open my mouth, but he stops me, “Wait, wait, I know. You want Kung Pao chicken with pan-fried noodles from the place on First Street,” he pauses. “Did I get it right?”

I can’t help but smile. “You got it so right, babe.” How does he still remember that? He just stands up, holding me in his arms, and starts walking towards the main living area. “I can walk, you can put me down.”

He places a kiss on my forehead, and says, “I know, but just let me take care of you, okay? Also, I’m dropping you off on the couch while I go order. You need to pick out what we’re watching.” He walks us around to the front of his oversized leather sectional, sets me down in the corner, and hands me an Apple TV remote.

“What are you in the mood for?” I call out to him, but I think he walked into the kitchen.

“Whatever you want, babe!” he yells back. Okay then, Queen Charlotte it is. I open his Netflix, but stop. In his ‘Continue Watching,’ When Harry Met Sally is sitting there, like a movie recommending a person. Like a sign from the Nora Ephron movie gods, I’ve made the right choice.

“Are you sure you can’t stay?” Matthias asks me as I put my dress back on. He comes up behind me, refastening the dress, then gently massages my neck. Oh my god, how can I say no to this man when he touches me like this?

“It’s not fair to ask me when you’re massaging me like that.”

He chuckles, “Oh, I know.”

“I have to go home. The girls are there. So is Jess, and Damian, too.” His hand tenses before he stops entirely. I turn to face him, his expression slightly hardened. “Does it bother you that Damian is staying at my house?”

“Yes,” he says nonchalantly, just matter of fact. I get it. I guess I’d feel the same.

“Okay, but you do understand that he and I share children? And they’re entitled to see their father, and that will never change, right?” I hope my tone doesn’t come out as bitchy. I try to say it gently, but firmly.

“I understand why that’s important to you, yes.”

“Great, because yeah, my own father was a complete waste of human space, but Damian isn’t. He’s a good dad, and the girls deserve a present parent like him in their life.”

Matthias rubs my back in understanding. “I get it, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it, okay?” That’s fair. If the tables were turned, I’d feel the exact same way.

“Okay,” I say, then slip my heels back on. Matthias throws on the t-shirt I was just wearing and a pair of driving mocs. And God, he could wear a garbage bag and still be gorgeous. I can’t stop smiling at him when he slides back up to me. He pulls me into an embrace and drops his forehead to mine.

“I wish we could always be like this,” his whisper comes out softly. I wish that, too. “What are you doing tomorrow?”

“I’m not sure. I might try and take Jess to Colton’s for late lunch or dinner. I don’t know yet.”

“Well, if you can pencil me in, I’d love to see you.” My heart falters a moment because I don’t know the next time I’ll be able to see him, like this. The girls will be with me the rest of the summer, and while Jess hasn’t given me a definitive departure, once she leaves, I won’t feel comfortable leaving the girls at home alone at night. And it’s not like him and I can have sex at my place. If the girls could hear me crying, chances are high they’ll be able to hear us having sex. I absolutely can’t subject them to that. I’m sure I’ve already scarred them enough with all the excessive sobbing.

Ugh, it doesn’t even end there. Then when they go back to school, I go back to Virginia, for at least a month, if not more, while they get settled. Matthias reads me and asks, “What is it?”

“It’s just, I don’t know when we’ll be able to see each other, like this,” I gesture to him and me and then to his room, “again.” It’s certainly not like how it was with Liam. No chance to just hole up and make love for a month straight. Not that that was a good idea. I look down at my pregnant belly. And then what happens when I have the baby? I’ll be on parent duty every single day. There’ll never be a chance to be like that with Mats. Not for a very long time, if ever. It makes me sad that I won’t get that time with him. He’s just thrown straight into the lion’s den of my life. I sniff and crinkle my nose to try and hold back the tears. Fucking hormones.

“We will see each other, babe.”

“I know, but we won’t just have time to ourselves. Let alone intimate time.” I sniffle, then laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. “I like having sex with you.” I give him a mock sad face as real tears fall.

“Okay, babe. Come here.” He slips his arms around me, putting my cheek to his chest. “I love having sex with you, but that’s not all I’m in this for. I want to be with you, and if that means always being around your family, that’s what we’ll do. And if it means sneaking around to fool around like we used to, that’s what we’ll do. too.”

“Are you sure that’s what you want, though? You could be with some-” he cuts me off.

“Stop suggesting that, Brit. I only want to be with you, okay? And if it has to be on less-than-ideal terms, so be it.” His hands trail up and down my back seductively and I know I have to have him one last time. Without me saying a word, he reaches up and moves his hands to the dress hooks at my neck, undoing them, causing the straps to fall and exposing my breasts. I let the rest of the dress fall, again, then inch his tee up with my hands.

He sheds the t-shirt, sweats, and his shoes, then lifts me up and sets me on the bed, removing my heels swiftly. He crawls over me, but I shake my head, pushing on his shoulder for him to roll over and he does, falling happily on his back.

“Trust me, babe. I’m going to want this all the time. We’ll find a way, I promise,” he says, then grips my hips tightly to slide me onto his waiting and ready cock. My hands are placed on his pecs, arms straight as I push down on him and throw my head back in ecstasy. I’m in the habit of no longer accepting promises or making them either, but hopefully, we can try because I want Mats and I to have our chance. I don’t want to regret the should have, could have, might haves anymore.

As I slide down, he thrusts upwards and we grind together. His hand comes up to play with my nipples as my nails dig into his chest. The harder I claw at him, the harder he thrusts, and we go back and forth, neither of us wanting this moment to end.

“Stay with me tonight, Brit,” Matthias gets out in between thrusts. I can’t, though. It’s bad enough I’m pregnant with someone else’s baby. I have to set a better example than this for the girls, no matter the circumstances. I shake my head no, and he roars when he thrusts into me.

He flips us easily, placing my back against the mattress. “I don’t like it when you say no to me,” he practically growls. Fuck yes, a little role playing is exactly what I want.

“I don’t want to say no to you…”

“Then don’t,” he bites back, lifting my left leg to his shoulder and driving into me.

“A compromise?” I wager.

“I’m listening.”

“When we’re in the bedroom, I won’t say no to you here.” He drops my leg and braces himself over me, kissing me with his all.

“You’ve gotta deal, sweetpea.” I laugh at the nickname and his fervor both. He rails me like I’ve never been fucked before. Just as I start to get close, he pulls out and instructs me, “Flip over, babe.” I get on all fours in front of him, and he pushes in slowly to start. The change in angle has me clenching my fists in the sheets and he presses down on my back, forcing my ass higher and my chest lower to the bed.

“Brit, not tonight, but soon, your ass is mine, babe.” As I’m about to tell him I’m close, he beats me to it, leaning forward to rub my clit. “Come with me, baby,” he whispers over me. I nod, and when he dips a hand into my hair, tugging me back, I come hard. I grasp onto the sheets for dear life as my muscles contract and pull his throbbing cock in. He grunts, slamming my ass against him as he fills me for the second time tonight.

We stay like that for several moments until he releases his hold on my hair and moves his cock out of my body, but he doesn’t move away. I turn around to look at him, and like the words are written on his forehead in Sharpie, I can see it. He’s in love with me.

Matthias opens his mouth to say something, but changes his mind and closes up instead. I turn over to my back and he moves forward, to lay beside me, so I roll to face him. “I’d do anything to make this work, babe. Anything,” he says.

I just nod my head solemnly and kiss him like it’s the last time, with my everything. All my hopes and dreams for us, all the years of yearning, but never having. I put it out there. It’s not words that say I love you, but it’s in my actions. In my touch. There’s a part of me that will always love Matthias, whether I can verbalize it or not. Whether he’s my soul mate or not, there’s something between us that’s just so right. We come together so…right. When I let his face go and move off the bed to use the toilet, he just says, “Same, babe,” to my back as I walk away.