30. Chapter 30
Chapter 30
I’m ready… and you’re shocked.
Serlotminden returned as he always did with some kind of animal. The days after the snow storm had passed with him hunting and bringing dead animals back to me and Pookie with a wide grin. He was a fucking caveman, and Mindy loved it and so did I. He hadn’t treated me any different after I’d broken and told him everything. If anything, he was kinder, and he certainly touched me more, not like he was expecting anything, more like he couldn’t help himself.
I was… I don’t even know, trying to work through what I did on Xome. Often, I stared at Mindy and expected him to suddenly change, to hate me, to never want to look at me again. But he didn’t. He kept loving me. Though no matter how much Serlotminden said I had no reason to blame myself, I still felt guilty as hell and memories haunted me, dragging me into the past at the oddest times. Nightmares also plagued me with some frequency, but every time I woke up screaming, Mindy was there, kissing me and soothing me back to sleep.
Maybe Mindy was right. I needed time to process what happened. At least, I hoped he was. I hoped there was a future without the past hanging over me like a cloud.
Huddling near the fire with Pookie by my side, I watched as he carefully roasted the bird. Serlotminden had brought other animals, fruits, and root vegetables back to our makeshift home, but the beefy birds were my favorite, which he knew. He was always extra pleased when he managed to catch one, usually boasting about his skills, smug as hell.
I was finally eating enough that I’d started to fill out. My ribs weren’t as visible, and my arms weren’t as bony. It would be a while before I wasn’t underweight, but I was certainly looking better than I had in a very long time. Serlotminden, though, had lost weight. Not enough to worry me, but enough for me to notice his looser clothes.
My teeth sank into my lip as I stared at his sculpted ass. He was as gorgeous as ever. It didn’t matter what he was doing, I loved watching him. His laugh was so contagious that it almost always brought a smile to my face.
He was good. So perfectly good.
I looked up and flushed. Serlotminden was smirking at me. He wiggled his hips, and my cheeks burned. He laughed, head going back. “You are so cute.”
I frowned, but I wasn’t actually annoyed. With every touch, look, and word, it made me desire him more. Snuggling against him was enough to perk up my dick. I wanted him. Bad. Which was new for me. Desiring the concept of romance or sex with someone and desiring someone I actually knew were two very different things. The first I’d experienced before; the latter, this was the first time.
Crossing my arms, I decided to be direct. He was straightforward; I could be as well. “I want to fuck.”
Serlotminden fell backward into the snow, ass planting on the ground. “What?”
“Fuck. I want you to fuck me,” I said again in case he hadn’t heard me the first time.
His mouth dropped open.
“I’ve never been with anyone before. You’re the first person I’ve ever kissed, so we’ll have to go slow. I know you need permissions or whatever. I don’t know exactly what those entail, because I don’t really know what I like or not. I mean, I’ve jerked off, and know what I like in that regard, but I haven’t had anal sex or played with toys or even my fingers. I’d never been interested before. Sex wasn’t really much of a need for me.”
He continued to gape at me.
“I want you inside me, though. I need it. So, yeah, I want you to fuck me. Maybe tonight. If you want. We could do it now, but I’m hungry and that smells good.”
If he didn’t close his mouth soon, his tongue was going to freeze. He seemed incapable of speech as he stared at me. Hurt pricked my chest like needles. Did he not desire me now that I was offering myself?
“Is that a no?” I asked. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
“No,” he said in a rush, scrambling over to me. “I mean, yes. I mean…” He grabbed my cheeks and kissed me. His lips were hard against mine, frantic in their movement. I brushed his sides, dislodging Pookie who was snuggled against my hip and she snorted. She skittered toward the roasting bird, even though she’d eaten the entrails already.
“I want to,” Mindy gasped against my lips. “I want to so badly.”
I pulled him closer until he straddled my lap, but he supported most of his weight on his knees. Cold emanated from the ground under the blanket, but the fire warmed the backs of my hands and he warmed my chest. I gripped his hips, lips moving over his. His tongue flicked out, and I opened for him. He slid his scaled tongue over mine, making me moan. He sucked on my bottom lip, biting me, before pillaging my mouth.
My cock hardened and pressed against him; it was not alone. The hard length of Serlotminden pushed into my stomach. I groaned, trying to gather him even closer. I wanted him so bad. He rocked, giving both of our dicks much needed friction. It was good, but not even close to enough. More. Fuck, I needed more. So much more.
“Mindy,” I breathed. “I need you.”
“You have me. I will never leave you. Not ever. Not if the stars cease to shine or even if the sun extinguishes. I am yours, now and forever. No force will ever tear me from your side.”
I groaned.
Food could wait, except my stomach chose that moment to growl. He chuckled against my lips, making me grin. He pulled back, humor dancing in his green eyes. “You did say you were hungry.”
“I am, but I’m also fucking desperate for you.”
He nuzzled my neck as he took deep breaths, huffing me as usual. “Let’s eat first. Then maybe nap. Tonight, we’ll fuck.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but my stomach grumbled again. Serlotminden was never going to let me be hungry. He was too concerned about how thin I was. Relenting, I kissed his ear and nibbled on the gold studs until I reached the tapered point, which I bit. He moaned. Hmm. That was something I’d need to investigate later.
“Fine.” I peeked at Pookie and snapped, “Stop!”
She paused, legs scrunched like she was about to leap onto the flames. Her pig nose wiggled and her forked tongue flicked out.
“Pookie,” I warned.
“Come here, Daughter,” Mindy called in a cajoling voice.
Pookie cocked her head, eyes going two different directions. I swore she was the ugliest, cutest thing I’d ever seen. Mindy called her again, and she looked at the roasting bird one more time before crawling over to us. She snuggled against my side and Mindy stroked one of her long ears.
“She’s fine now,” he said.
Kissing his neck, I buried my face in the crook and snuggled him close.
Serlotminden stayed on my lap until he was sure the bird was done, then he got up and gave me most of it, though he did give Pookie a big chunk. I tried to give him some back, but he refused.
He said, “I like feeding you.”
“I don’t like you losing weight.”
“I like you not being as starved.” He kissed my cheek. “I am fine. I promise.”
I ate, but I did manage to give Serlotminden more. Afterward, he tugged me into the cabin and we curled up together. How was I this happy or content? I sure as hell didn’t deserve it, nor did it make sense. Perhaps I didn’t have to deserve Mindy and maybe it didn’t have to make sense. We just were, and I never wanted that to change.