Date with Destiny

Chapter Thirty-Four

‘This couple came in the new store the other day – she’s pregnant,’ I begin, staring blindly at the TV screen in front of us. ‘They were called Clive and Irene and said they want to name their kid after both of them.’

Beside me, I feel Myfanwy cock her head. ‘Hmm, so that would make it…’

We say it at the same time: ‘… Chlorine!’

She laughs. ‘That can’t be true – you’re making that up,’ she says through giggles.

‘I swear!’ I say, glancing briefly away from the captivating, familiar woman on screen. ‘The new store really does attract some, er, interesting people. They’re all too cool to breathe the same air as the rest of us.’

‘I think Sonali and I will call our daughter Charlotte,’ Myfanwy announces, throwing a piece of popcorn in the vague direction of her mouth.

I frown. It’s a nice name, but not really in the spirit of our hilariously stupid baby names chat.

She glances over at me, grinning. There’s a piece of popcorn sticking to her cheek. ‘She’ll be named after my favourite type of potato – I think that’s really meaningful.’

‘Oh phew,’ I laugh. ‘It was a joke; I thought for a moment you were telling me you guys were actually pregnant.’ She doesn’t answer and I sideways look over at her again. Oh my god, she’s not?

‘Sorry, what?’ Her eyes are glued to the telly. ‘I wasn’t listening.’ She furrows her brows, ‘Did you just ask me if I’m pregnant? Ew! Gross, no!’ She rolls her eyes. ‘I think you’d know if we were planning to start a family; it’s a bit of a different experience to hetero-pregnancies, you know?’

‘Of course,’ I mumble, feeling stupid and privileged. She turns her attention back to the TV screen, pointing at the shimmering star up there. ‘She is amazing! Did you hear what she just said to that guy?’

I return my gaze to the woman in question: Crystal Ball.

It took us some time and some serious deep diving into local TV programming, but last week we managed to locate my life-changing psychic’s show. We had to subscribe and download an app onto Myfanwy’s TV, and the whole thing keeps crashing, but all the trouble is so worth it. Crystal is an absolute joy.

I watch her now, completely enthralled.

Crystal has her eyes shut as she awaits inspiration, holding the energy of the room with ease. A quivering young man in the front row awaits his future, and at last her eyes fly open and she shrieks, her huge, untamed red hair flailing in the studio wind.

Her hair is phenomenal, I note. It looks slightly like she’s wearing a wig on top of another wig but that only adds to the fabulous. The colour is fire orange and moving, like something is alive in there, moving uncomfortably under the top wig beneath heavy studio lights. The orangey effect extends to her skin, which is Tan mom-deep and glistening. Her whole head has the vibe of a lit candle wick, flickering and moving, dimming and brightening.

‘I’ve had a vision!’ she hollers now, enormous hoop earrings swaying from her poor earlobe; slightly elongated from prolonged abuse. She gets close to the young man’s face and he is so pale beside her intense colouring. ‘YOU! I can see it – she is coming back to you,’ Crystal hisses at him accusatorily.

‘She is?’ he brightens enormously, some pinkness returning at last to his cheeks. ‘That’s the best news, thank you so much, Crystal!’ He is gushing now. ‘Do you know if that means she’s forgiven me for sleeping with her mum and—’ Crystal doesn’t wait for his follow-up question, moving away and up the audience’s middle aisle.

‘YOU!’ She points at a woman in her seventies with audacious purple lipstick, sitting dead centre of the row. ‘You,’ she says again in a softer tone, getting a faraway look in her eye. ‘You have lost people…’ Crystal reaches across other audience members, squishing them without a care. ‘And I’m sorry, my love, but you will lose more. There will be an illness, but that won’t be the end, though you might think it. There is time for another adventure. Another great love is coming for you.’ The woman gasps excitedly and the elderly man beside her looks put out. Crystal turns away from her and towards the camera.

It’s like she’s looking straight at me.

‘There’s something else,’ she says, eyes narrowing. ‘Something new. Someone new watching.’

Beside me, Myfanwy gasps. ‘She means us!’

‘She probably gets a notification when someone new downloads the app,’ I mutter, a feeling creeping over me. ‘We probably just doubled their viewer subscription.’

‘No way,’ Myfanwy moves away from me and closer to the TV. ‘She’s talking to us – to you.’

On the screen, Crystal looks dazed and far away, but still addresses the camera. ‘You need something from me. You have questions. Tell me your questions, concentrate, I can hear you.’ Myfanwy makes a choking noise but I am transfixed, staring into Crystal’s deep, eerily green eyes.

They’re probably coloured contacts.

‘Talk back to her!’ Myfanwy whispers intensely.

‘What?’ I scoff. ‘Don’t be silly.’

‘I’m not being silly,’ Myfanwy glares at me. ‘She’s the real deal and she’s talking to you. Talk to her.’

Sulkily, I begin in a quiet voice. ‘I just want to know more about these predictions you made for me when I was sixteen.’

On the telly, Crystal frowns. ‘You’re not being clear enough; I can’t make you out. Focus, I want to help you.’

‘OK,’ I clear my throat, feeling intensely silly and embarrassed. ‘I want to know what the point of it all was, what was I supposed to learn? Was it all to make me a stronger person?’ I pause. ‘And where’s my soulmate? It’s been such a bunch of dead ends this last seven months.’

Crystal closes her eyes on the screen for a moment and when she opens them, her face is clear and serene. Even the oversized hair and earrings have stopped moving. ‘I hear you,’ she says at last. ‘And I have answers.’ She smiles. ‘But that’s all we have time for today. Goodbye for now, everyone.’

The camera pans away, across an awed-looking audience as a voiceover guy tells us this was the last episode of the current series – but we can apply to be in the audience of the next, by emailing or calling this very expensive number. Does that mean it wasn’t live? She can’t have been talking to me if it wasn’t live.

Beside me Myfanwy scrambles for her phone, noting down the details.

‘You want to go on the show?’ I ask and she shakes her head. ‘No.’ She stops, looking up at me. ‘I mean obviously yes. But I’m writing this down so that we can speak to the studio, see if Crystal Ball does private sessions or if she’d be willing to speak to us on the phone.’ I nod, feeling very strange. It really did seem like she was speaking to us – or to me. What if she really could hear me across the airwaves somehow? What if she really can see into my future?

I switch off the TV and turn to Myfanwy. ‘Right, enough spooky stuff, tell me exactly what the plan is for Project Proposal.’

She nods, looking thrilled. ‘I’ve decided on a date!’ As I gasp, she adds, ‘The third of March.’

‘Oh my god,’ I breathe. ‘Sonali’s birthday! Of course! But that’s only five weeks away. How many of the ten rings have you got so far?’

‘Six,’ she confirms and I squeal. I’ve only helped her source half of those.

Myfanwy grins, glowing with excitement. ‘I’ve decided to throw her a party, and I’ll get down on one knee there.’

‘Oh, right! Wow!’ I am surprised and a little bit unsure about this. Myfanwy obviously knows her best, but I have also known Sonali for a long time. She’s not someone who would really like a public proposal, I don’t think. She loves a party but for something intensely personal and romantic like this, I really think she’d want privacy.

‘It’s a good idea, right?’ she looks at me eagerly. ‘We’re such a close-knit group, I think she’d be excited to share the moment with you all.’

‘Hmm,’ I say, trying to think of a way of framing my thoughts. ‘I think…’ I chicken out. ‘I think it sounds lovely!’ I swallow hard.

I might’ve found some bravery in telling Mikey off a couple of weeks ago, but I’m still working on the courage when it comes to talking to loved ones about difficult subjects.

‘Great,’ she beams. ‘I’ve made some notes about the speech. I’m going to talk her through all those moments I loved her best, when I knew I wanted to be with her forever, then produce the real ring.’

‘Has Zach finished it?’ I ask, trying to keep my voice neutral. Although Zach’s not working at Celeste’s Stones anymore, he’s been designing Myfanwy’s ring in his capacity as a freelancer. We’ve provided the – hugely discounted – stones and metal though.

I haven’t heard from Zach since Toni and Shawn’s Christmas party. I still burn with the humiliation, thinking about throwing myself at him like that. But it’s more than that: I’m professionally embarrassed, too. I’m the one who brought him on and I made all those big promises about working together – and then Celeste binned him off after only a few short months.

I find myself really missing his company in the quieter moments – of which there are loads at the new store. It’s dead most days, with just the hideous noise of that dreadful advert playing above my head eight hours a day.

I think about how much we laughed together, and how kind he was. He was nice to be around. And I could use some of his positivity at the new store, watching it fail from the inside out.

Myfanwy reaches across to her bedside table, pulling out a small ring box from under piles of drawer junk. She opens it reverentially and we both blink at the dazzling jewellery inside.

Zach has done an incredible job.

It’s very traditional and Myfanwy has gone for a diamond, which I’m delighted about – nothing beats a diamond in my opinion. It’s a white gold band, with a majestic, Round Brilliant cut diamond – I’d estimate just under a carat, maybe 0.86 – mounted with four tall, round claws and nestled between infinity-shaped shoulder diamonds. The smaller stones are set in a double row with mirroring curves that gleam like magic.

‘It’s perfect,’ I breathe out, awed, as Myfanwy’s phone buzzes.

‘Jesus,’ she mutters, looking at the screen. ‘It’s Daniel.’

‘What?’ I am baffled. ‘Why is he texting you?’

She shrugs and opens the message.

I’ve not heard a lot from him since our life-changing trip on shrooms, when he found me on a date with another man.

To be honest, I’ve been hoping he’d got the message without me having to talk to him. Except now here he is, messaging my best friend.

Myfanwy reads it out loud.

Hey Myfanwy, sorry to bother you. I wondered if I could ask your advice about Ginny? Is she still seeing that guy Mikey? I really want to talk to her about how I feel, but I’m also aware how badly I’ve treated her and don’t want to interfere or wreck things if she’s happy. Do you think I should just leave her alone now? Would really appreciate your advice. Daniel x

‘Fuck.’ Myfanwy’s eyebrows shoot up and she’s looking at me with alarm. ‘Is Daniel… growing up? This is quite a mature message, isn’t it? Actually putting your feelings ahead of his? Has he ever done that before?’

I give her a reproachful look before remembering I’d kind of come to the same conclusion about our relationship.

She’s right – this doesn’t really sound like that Daniel. Like my Daniel. The Daniel I dated for five years would never have worried about whether it was going to upset me to turn up or message again. Even the Daniel from a month ago apparently wasn’t concerned about how it would affect me when he showed up at that bar trying to make some kind of heartfelt confession.

‘I should probably talk to him,’ I say hesitantly. ‘I mean… I should, shouldn’t I? If he’s making an effort to think about my feelings, I should do the same for him.’

There is a question in my voice and Myfanwy begins with the same uncertainty in hers. ‘I know you’d decided you definitely don’t want to get back with Daniel,’ she searches my face. ‘But would it change anything for you if he’d changed? If this Daniel who is putting you first and wants you to be happy is a Daniel who tells you he’s still in love with you and wants to give things another go, would you consider it?’

I am floored by this question.

And how can I answer it? If this really is a different Daniel, then how can I know how I’d feel? I know I don’t want to be in that relationship we were in before. I know I don’t want to be with that man. But what if it’s a different relationship – a different man – he’s offering?

I shake my head, dismissing the question. ‘People don’t change, not really,’ I say with a surety I don’t feel. ‘Or maybe they do for a while but then they change back.’

Myfanwy smirks. ‘I don’t know, you seem quite different lately.’

I shake my head again, harder this time. ‘No, I don’t want to get back with Daniel, and I’m going to text him, arrange a coffee, and tell him that straight. He deserves to know where he stands and I’m being more direct with people this year.’

‘Good girl!’ Myfanwy says with enthusiasm. ‘Speaking of that,’ she continues conversationally. ‘Have you decided not to talk to Toni about Shawn after all?’

‘Ugh!’ I say now, throwing my hands up. ‘The thing is, I don’t know if he’s all that bad these days. Maybe he’s growing up?’

‘I thought people didn’t change?’ Myfanwy parrots my words and I shoot her a look.

‘Admit it though, Myfe, he was pretty great with the Mikey stuff, wasn’t he?’ I sigh. ‘I know he’s gross and super annoying. But just because he chews with his mouth open and doesn’t cover up when he coughs, does that mean he shouldn’t be with Toni?’

Myfanwy pulls a disgusted face. ‘But what about the age gap? Or the fact that he still explodes over the smallest thing?’

I nod. ‘I know, I know. He’s incredibly fragile and ego-driven, but I think he wants to be better. He was talking the other day about having three big brothers and a really overbearing alpha dad. I think he’s just another sad product of the male surroundings he was brought up in.’ Myfanwy looks like she will argue this some more so I put a hand on her arm. ‘Ultimately, I’m still not happy about any of it, but I can only support Toni in her decisions. She’s a grown-up and I can’t force her to see what an idiot he is,’ I say simply and her mouth closes. ‘I think we have to respect her choices.’ She rolls her eyes, but I know she agrees.