Finding Her Strength (Sonoma #3)

8. Hope

8

HOPE

I flip over from my stomach to my back for the umpteenth time this morning. I’ve been awake for the last two hours, unable to find my way back to sleep. Instead of a nightmare waking me up, the image of hazel-green eyes and strong muscles haunt my dreams. Now, I can’t stop my thoughts from swirling.

The mystery man yesterday was a wrench in my day I was not prepared to deal with. What’s worse is my thoughts sway from outright indignation to fascination in the span of a few minutes. I mean, who flirts with a girl while they’re buying flowers for someone else? Seriously? I know he said they were for a friend, but there’s no way a guy who looks like him is just friends with a girl. He probably has several women lined up, ready to go, whenever he wants it.

The other thing I keep getting stuck on was his apology for blurting out a compliment. He didn’t take his compliment back, but he apologized for the inappropriate words. It was weird having a man apologize to me for something so small. It’s never happened to me before, and now, I can’t get the encounter out of my head.

Between his light brown hair, hazel eyes, and strong jaw, he was very handsome. It also felt like I could feel his smile deep in my soul, which was weird. I’m not sure what’s going on in my head at this point. Reacting to the guy at the grocery store as well as the mystery man yesterday is abnormal.

A sigh falls deep from my chest. There’s no point in dwelling on these thoughts. It’s not like anything will ever happen between us, even if I wanted it to. And I don’t. I don’t want anything to happen. The idea of having a man in my life sends a shiver down my spine, and not the good kind, either. I’ve never experienced a good shiver. I’ve read about them in romance books but have no idea what it would be like to feel one in real life.

I shake my head at the direction of my thoughts. I don’t need any of that. I don’t want any of that. I’d rather be alone with no experiences than to be beholden to another man—especially one who could be a womanizer. I came to Sonoma to build myself up, not have someone else do it for me, so it’s best if I move on from this silly line of thinking.

Instead of continuing to dwell, I get out of bed to get ready for the day. I’m moving out of my apartment today. The last couple of days have been crazy. Quinn has been so helpful in getting the rental house ready for me. I’ll be forever grateful for her kindness. She’s providing a lot of the furniture since most of the things in this apartment aren’t mine. They wouldn’t fit in her house, even if they were. Quinn’s rental is a beautiful three-bedroom house, whereas this apartment is barely big enough to hold one person.

The only things I’m taking are the kitchen stuff I bought and the stuff from my bedroom. Oh, and the comfy patio chair I splurged on when I first moved here. I was told there is a patio space in the backyard, which I’m looking forward to utilizing. My tiny balcony is nice, but not quite functional.

Walking out to my disaster area of a kitchen, I take in the boxes stacked on the floor. The empty countertop makes me realize I packed my coffee pot last night, which was monumentally stupid. If I have any hope of packing the remaining items or making it through the exhausting day ahead, I’m going to need caffeine.

Grabbing my keys from the counter, I head to the little café around the corner from my apartment. I’m going to miss being within walking distance of this place. I have a feeling this new house will be exactly what I’ve been missing, though.

A knock at my door has me setting the tape dispenser down on top of the box I was about to close. I quickly open the door, and all the blood drains from my face when I see who’s on the other side.

I expected it to be Quinn and Cooper, but instead, the hazel-eyed stranger from yesterday is standing there. Fear snakes down my spine, and I grip the door handle a little harder to keep from falling down.

“How do you know where I live?” I ask, barely managing to speak above a whisper. The stranger keeps looking at me with wide eyes. Through the haze of apprehension, I can see he’s just as surprised as I am, which is odd since he’s the one who knocked on my door.

“Um… are you Hope?” he asks, but before I can answer, another voice sounds from the bottom of the open-air stairway.

“Levi! I’m surprised you’re here so early,” Quinn says, coming up the stairs. I guess that answers my question. I take a deep breath to quell the rest of my anxiety and smile when Quinn’s happy face finally makes it to the top of the stairs.

My stranger—whose name is Levi, apparently—clears his throat, then looks at Quinn with a smile and gives her a quick kiss on the cheek .

“Yeah, I woke up early this morning and decided to come get a jump on things. Sorry for startling you,” he says, looking at me, his eyebrows furrowed. I’d imagine it’s because this is the second time he’s had to apologize to me in just as many days. Again, I find it odd how quickly he throws out an apology. Even for something he didn’t do on purpose.

“Did I not tell you Cooper’s brother was coming to help?” Quinn asks, her eyes wide in remorse.

I shake my head, a small smile pulling at my lips. I don’t want her to feel bad since she’s been so helpful to me. Plus, normal people don’t freak out over a random person knocking on their door. “It’s no big deal. Just a bit of a shock to have a hulking man outside my door when I expected a friendly woman.”

Quinn grins at me. “Well, this is Levi. Levi, this is Hope. He’s not always so hulk-like. He probably needs some breakfast.”

“We’re in luck, then. I stupidly packed my coffee pot last night, so I went to the café around the corner and bought pastries and coffee.” I beckon them into my apartment, leading them to the tiny kitchen. I have to maneuver around all the boxes in order to reach the pastry box.

When I turn around, I run smack into Levi’s chest, smashing the pastry box between us, almost dropping it. Levi grabs the box, his hands landing on mine as we both attempt to keep it from falling. The surprise of his hands on mine has me jerking them back. I’m glad he already had a hold of the box, otherwise, it would’ve fallen to the floor this time.

“I’m usually a lot smoother than this,” Levi says, a sheepish smile on his face. All I can do is quirk an eyebrow at him. It’s not hard to imagine how smooth he is with the ladies. He exudes a confidence that I’m sure makes any woman around him swoon. I refuse to acknowledge the effect it has on me. He clears his throat again, and I almost laugh at how unbalanced he seems .

“Right. Quinn, I have creamer and sugar if you need it.”

“I’ll take both, please,” she says from across the room. “You’ve gotten a lot done. I thought we’d have more to pack up before loading the truck. We’ll be finished in no time today.”

“I don’t have much, so it’s made the process much faster.” I walk into the living room, handing Quinn a coffee, then turn back to the box I was taping before Levi and Quinn got here.

“Cooper is on his way with the truck. I have to be at Paint and Paper when we’re done, so I drove separately. We’ll have the boys start loading the big things when he gets here. What else do we need to get into boxes?” Quinn manages the art gallery in town and is a very talented artist herself.

I point to what’s left in the living room, and Quinn and I start putting the remaining items in boxes. Levi hangs out in the kitchen, eating a pastry, since there’s not much for him to do until Cooper gets here. I can feel his eyes on me the entire time I’m packing. It’s a little disconcerting. Why he would want to look at me right now is beyond my comprehension.

Between my ratty hair, leggings, and T-shirt, I’m not exactly stare-worthy. I didn’t know my handsome stranger would be here, so I dressed for moving, not for impressing anyone.

My handsome stranger ? He’s not my anything. Even if I thought I’d want him to be. Which I don’t. Why am I thinking about this?

It’s not like it matters if he’s impressed anyway. I still don’t need a man in my life just because he might like me.

Luckily, Cooper’s knock and subsequent entrance disrupts my thoughts. He crosses the room quickly with his long stride, holding out his hand to introduce himself.

“It’s nice to meet you, Hope.” His smile is warm, and I find myself blinking rapidly at his attractiveness. His light brown hair, golden hazel eyes, and strong jaw are intimidatingly beautiful. My eyes find Levi’s, then bounce back and forth between the two men. They look so similar with the exception of their eyes. If Levi wasn’t wearing a backward navy blue baseball hat, they’d look like twins.

Oddly enough, Levi’s hat looks like the one that guy at the store was wearing. I wonder if they’re the same person, and I never realized.

“Yeah, nice to meet you, too.” I clear my throat, then look at Quinn, who’s grinning at me.

She leans in and whispers, “My reaction was pretty much the same when I first met him.”

Cooper winks at Quinn, and I think I may swoon. Jesus, this is too much to handle in one morning. “Let’s start with the furniture, then we can pack the boxes around it,” Cooper suggests.

I lead him and Levi into my bedroom, showing them what all needs to go. While they start loading furniture, Quinn and I finish packing the last boxes.

We get the truck and cars packed to the gills, but don’t quite get everything in one trip, which means we’ll have to come back. All things considered, I’m pretty happy. It’s been a surprisingly good day despite having to move all my stuff. Levi and Quinn’s relationship is hilarious. He treats her like a sister, constantly teasing her, which she returns in full. Then they’d team up to tease Cooper, which is equally hilarious.

There have been many times I’ve gotten distracted by Levi’s laugh or the way his eyes light up when he smiles. His joy fills the room to the point you have no choice but to smile with him. Each time he caught me staring at him, his smile would grow wider. I’m not sure what that means, to be honest, or what him staring back at me means, either. I usually ended up making the interaction awkward and then quickly moved on.

Carrying a box into my new rental house, I’m blown away by the beautiful space. Quinn is definitely letting me pay far too little for the house. There are French doors to my left, and the hallway continues toward the back of the house. Stairs are directly in front of me, and to my right are the living room, dining room, and kitchen, each room opening to the next. The sunlight flowing through the windows makes the space bright and airy. It’s perfect.

“Okay, Hope. How about you and Levi head back to your apartment to get the remaining boxes while Cooper and I get things organized here?” A little glimmer in Quinn’s eyes makes me frown. Her suggestion doesn’t make any sense to me. Shouldn’t I be the one to organize the boxes in my own place? Before I can argue with her, she turns around and walks back to the kitchen.

A touch on my arm has me flinching away, and I cringe at my reaction. When I glance up, Levi is staring at me, a frown lining his face. “You surprised me. I didn’t know you were standing right next to me,” I offer as an explanation. It’s not particularly true. I’ve known where he’s been the entire day. I just wasn’t prepared for him to touch me.

His touch feels different than anyone else's, though. When Claire accidentally brushes against me, it feels as if my skin is being peeled off my body. The couple of times Levi has touched me have been met with electricity that buzzes across my skin. It’s alarming and a little addicting if I’m honest.

I’m tempted to keep touching him to fully understand what is happening to me. I want to explore the prickle on my skin that makes goose bumps raise on my arms. Except that would be crazy. To seek out touch voluntarily goes so far out of my comfort zone, it would be insane.

He nods his head and gestures for the door. “Let’s head out.”

I follow him out to the truck while taking a deep breath. This is going to be interesting, to say the least.