Finding Her Strength (Sonoma #3)

13. “Rosemary”

13

“ROSEMARY”

SIX YEARS AGO

“ C an you make sure you’re careful around the roses, please?” I ask the gardener. His tanned skin shows signs of being outdoors for long periods of time. I think he’s my age, but it’s hard to tell between his sunglasses and wide hat.

“Of course, ma’am. I’m sorry if we’ve messed anything up.”

“Oh, you haven’t yet. The last guy to mow got too close, so I wanted you guys to pay a little more attention.”

“I’ll let them know,” he says with a nod of his head and a smile. I return his smile, then walk back toward the house. I love walking through the gardens. They have been a place of solace to me over the past few months. I’m not sure how well I would be coping without them.

The house is quite large. Even after living here for the past three months, I’m still struggling to adjust to the size. With five bedrooms and four bathrooms, it’s a lot to take care of every day, but I’m finally finding my groove. As well as what is expected of me.

That’s been the hardest adjustment. I thought living with all my father’s rules was difficult, but Antony is something else entirely.

Stepping through the foyer, the grand staircase is the first thing you see. To the right is a formal sitting room and to the left is Antony’s office. The door is always closed, no matter if he’s inside or not. Everything feels almost like a museum, like if you touch anything, it’ll be detrimental to the piece of furniture.

Past the staircase is the kitchen and one of the bedrooms. I spend most of my time in the kitchen. It has the best view of the flower garden in the backyard. All the windows give the chef-worthy kitchen a bright and cheery look.

“Marta, did you get everything we need for the party this week, or will you need to make a run to the store?”

“Rosemary, I need you in my office,” Antony says from behind me, startling me with how quietly he moves. I clench my fists to keep my words in check, then slowly turn to face him, attempting to keep my face blank. A little smirk pulls at his lips, knowing he got the drop on me. He enjoys playing his cat and mouse games.

I nod my head, following Antony back to his office. I have no idea what I could’ve done to require this meeting. I probably didn’t do anything, and he decided to change the rules just to have a reason to punish me. Keeping me on my toes is one of his favorite things to do. Right behind inflicting pain.

“Is everything running as it should? I heard you asking Marta about dinner this week.” Antony motions for me to sit in one of his brown leather visitor’s chairs sitting in front of his desk. His whole office is decorated with dark brown tones. Each piece of furniture chosen to show off his wealth, I’m sure.

He leans against his desk directly in front of me instead of sitting in his chair. His position gives him a height advantage to make me feel even smaller .

“Yes, since we added the dinner party to the schedule this week, I wanted to ensure Marta had what she needed.”

“Good. I’m glad to see you thinking of those details.”

You’ve ensured I won’t make those mistakes again. The words stick in my throat. I so badly want to say them out loud but know what will follow immediately if I do.

“Did you talk to the gardener today?”

“Yes, I wanted them to watch out for the roses,” I reply.

“Was it necessary to flirt with him?”

My eyes shoot up to Antony’s, his blue eyes steely and hard. What was he talking about?

“I wasn’t flirting.”

Antony’s fist clenches. “Don’t lie to me,” he growls.

Keeping my eyes locked with his so he knows I’m not lying, I defend myself again. “I wasn’t. I asked him to tell his guys to watch out for my roses, nothing more.”

Antony’s arm lashes out so fast, I barely have time to register it’s coming. The backhand throws my body into the side of the chair. If it hadn’t had arms, I would’ve been thrown to the floor from the impact. My right cheek throbs as tears spring to my eyes. I manage to hold my cry inside. I’m so used to the pain at this point, crying out does nothing but make me look weaker.

“I saw you, so don’t bother lying again. You are not to speak to any male again. If you need something done, you tell either me or Marta, and we will relay the message.”

I look up at Antony, his eyes gleaming with satisfaction. He catalogs the redness of my face and the tears filling my eyes. After a few painful minutes, he finally dismisses me.

I stand on shaky legs to walk out of the office, closing the door behind me as I go. When I’m back in the kitchen, Marta hands me a cold compress, knowing exactly what happened. Sometimes, I’m grateful for her help, and other times, I want to scream at her to do something. Ask her how she can watch this happen every day, and never say a word about it .

“I have everything I need for the party, Mrs. Malatelli.”

I nod my head, then leave the kitchen, needing a moment alone in my room.

I thought I’d have found an opportunity to get out of this long before now, but I haven’t.

I’m not sure I ever will.