Chapter 8 - Body
Breakfast is worse than awkward, and honestly, I don’t know what I expected. I certainly didn’t want her to immediately forgive me just because I made waffles, but I was hoping to make her happy.
When I walked out onto the deck and saw her standing in the backyard, I was completely enchanted all over again. With the early morning light picking out glints of ruby in her hair, her skin glowing, and her eyes bright blue, she looked like a supernatural creature. So impossibly beautiful, it’s hard to believe she’s even real.
I don’t think she noticed, but a cloud of butterflies appeared directly above her head while she was meditating. With birds flitting out of the nearby bushes to swoop around her, it only enhanced the feeling that she was not of this world, something truly precious and rare.
And I hurt her. I let her go. I’m the worst fool in all existence.
When I reach for her hand and she pulls away, I don’t blame her, but it still stings. I don’t know how long it will take for her to be able to trust me, but I’m in this for the long haul. I won’t give up until she knows how sorry I am.
“I have to go into town,” I remind her, but I’m also trying to break the silence and banish the awkwardness of the moment. It doesn’t work. She looks up at me with such a baleful expression, I feel ridiculous, as if I’ve just announced an incredibly obvious fact.
“So you said. I have to as well,” she says, blinking slowly.
“So if we both have to go to town,” I go on, stumbling over my words, “did you want to come with me?”
I feel like a goddamn idiot! Look at me, the star jock at high school, stumbling over his words like an inept, moronic waste of space.
I don’t want to tell her it’s actually an official meeting with Decker and his elders, the wild wolves, and Rider. Bae wants to get this issue sorted as quickly as possible, and he doesn’t want anyone making trouble. He truly believes this is an excellent step for our packs toward a bright future.
And so do I.
“Yeah, I’ll come,” she answers, finishing her waffles. “I need to meet up with the other witches and see if they’ve had any changes.”
“Surely it’s a good sign if you have more power than yesterday?” I ask. “I mean, I don’t know how it works, but it should mean that we did the right thing.”
She stares at me, her beautiful eyes wide and shimmering. Her face lacks expression, but it isn’t blank. I can sense emotion in her, like a great, raging torrent barely held back by a rock-solid dam.
I want to yell and wave my arms, tell her that she should fight with me, say everything she has ever needed to say.
I deserve it!
But I stay quiet, suffering her cool gaze. If she doesn’t want to talk to me, then I need to just bear it.
“I can’t be sure of anything yet,” she mutters. “Let me get my phone, and I’ll be ready to go. I’ll text Lucy so I can get the rest of my stuff.”
She leaves the room, and I can’t help myself—I watch her leave. I never imagined a pair of old cast-off corduroys with a baggy sweater could be so sexy.
Anything is sexy on her.
I can’t stop thinking about how it felt to wrap my arms around her big, soft curves. Snuggling with her at night, cuddling with her on the couch while we watched movies—I had never felt so comfortable, or so loved.
I’ve never understood the obsession with being thin. Girls are so much more beautiful when they have a curvy shape—and Amanda wears her curves with so much confidence, it’s sexy as hell.
I hear her footsteps in the hall and turn my eyes away so she doesn’t see me staring like a creep. I pick up the plates and put them in the sink, grabbing my keys. When I look up at her, she slides her gaze away from me, as if she doesn’t want to make eye contact.
But you’re so beautiful. How can I stop looking at you?
“Are you ready?” she asks.
“Sure!” I agree, hoping I’m not being painfully enthusiastic.
She walks ahead of me, and again, I struggle not to stare too hard.
Fuck it, she can’t see me looking, so why not?
I slow down another step, letting my gaze travel down, admiring her soft waist, wide hips, and plump butt. I can remember all too clearly what it felt like to hug that body tightly and reach around to squeeze that gorgeous ass.
She goes through the front door and walks over to the truck. I struggle slightly as I lock the door. She has such a powerful effect on me, I might even forget how to breathe.
It’s not just being near her… it’s the shock that I thought I'd never see her again, and now she’s right here, and we’re married.
When I start up the truck, she just stares out the window, obviously ignoring me. I start to feel dizzy, then I realize I actually have been holding my breath.
Yup, I forgot how to breathe. Surely, she knows what she’s doing to me.
“Where did you want me to drop you off?” I ask, trying to sound casual.
“Lucy’s bakery. The others are meeting me there.”
“Okay, cool. I’m not sure how long I’ll be, but just text me when you’re done, and I’ll come as quickly as possible.”
“One of the girls can bring me home, I’m sure.”
“Amanda,” I say, an exasperated tone creeping into my voice, “I’m trying as hard as I can to make you comfortable. I don’t expect waves of gratitude from you, but some acknowledgment would be nice. We used to be so close, don’t you remember?”
She turns to look at me, and her eyes feel like lasers. Her hair moves as if a breeze is blowing inside the truck, which is impossible.
There it is… that electrifying energy that I always felt around her. She’s so beautiful, unique, and powerful. How did I let her get away?
“You think I don’t remember?” she says, her voice hard but even. She appears completely calm, and I have to admit, I was hoping for some emotion from her.
Positive or negative, I’ll take either right now.
She reaches over and puts her hand over mine where it rests on the gear stick. A soft sigh eases through my lips, and goosebumps fly across my skin. Her thumb gently strokes across the edge of my fingers, and I can almost feel the sensation all over my body, as if she can touch me anywhere she wants just by thinking about it. I blink hard, keeping some of my attention on the road while Amanda’s touch slowly erodes the rest of my control.
“You think I don’t remember this?” she asks, and her voice is incredibly soft, a murmur of breath that barely makes a sound. I can feel her arousal, and smell it. I’ve been so long without any contact at all—and missing her so much—that I can’t suffer through this with grace.
Just when I’m about to pull the truck over, she removes her hand, and the pleasurable sensations shut down. The sudden lack of them leaves me feeling cold. Shocked and sick, like I just fell into a frozen lake and almost died before someone could pull me out.
“I remember everything, Body,” she says, her voice harsh again, “and I’ll never forget how you hurt me. You want to relive the old days? Well, relive that moment, over and over, just like I have for the past ten years.”
But I have!
My regret is so powerful, it tears at every single inch of me, ripping through my heart and soul. If I tell her I’ve been hurting, too, I know it will just seem like I’m making it all about me. So I keep my mouth shut and drive her straight to the bakery.
“I’ll see you later,” I say, feeling awkward and inadequate.
She gets out of the truck and leaves with a slight wave.
As I turn towards Shelley’s, I can feel sweat trickling down my sides. My heart is hammering up into my throat. Deep in my blood, my wolf is raging, snapping, and snarling.
So close… she’s so close, and yet so far.
I try to quiet my mind as I arrive at Shelley’s, knowing I’ll need to be thinking clearly to join the discussion. As I get close to the back door, though, I can already hear raised voices.
Looks like everyone brought nothing but raw emotion to the meeting today.
I enter the room. At one end of the long table are Bae, Rider, Carson, Jen, and Peter. At the other end are Belle, Decker, and Gladys, standing like a united force. Kelta and a couple of her scouts are in the middle, looking back and forth between the two sides.
“I told you, this meeting is a waste of time!” Decker yells. “We won’t stand for this. I was prepared to make a one-off exception, but if wolves marrying witches is going to be an ongoing trend, I won’t support it.”
“Decker,” Jen says in a hard voice. “Witches and wolves have always wedded. It’s one of the oldest traditions in the mountains.”
“Then why didn’t it happen for the last hundred years?” Decker demands. “Why did wolves and witches become enemies?”
“Because of ignorant jerks like you!” Jen shrieks, finally losing it.
“It was because of the snare spell, like the one Miss Lucy put on that rogue wolf,” Kelta says, her voice very soft. “A few wolves got enchanted, and the alphas didn’t like it. So, they moved the packs far from the witches and banished the wolves that wanted to stay with their witch wives.”
“Just as they should,” Gladys snaps.
“Look, I can see how anyone would get upset at a forced marriage—” Bae starts.
“Do you?” Decker cuts in.
“Yeah, I do!” Bae yells. “But what do you think has been going on all this time? We have set up marriages for our own good, with little thought for the people involved. Or did you forget that?”
“That was wolves being wedded to wolves to strengthen the bond between our packs,” Gladys says. “It’s progress, and new blood for all of us. Wedding witches is pure abomination.”
“Decker, wait. We’re getting off-track,” Bae says, shaking his head and covering his face with his hand. “If I invite the coven into my pack and allow my wolves to mingle with the witches and even marry them, what will you do?”
“We will withdraw from you,” Decker says firmly. “All of my wolves will return to Silverton. Any who don’t come with me when I leave better stay here. They won’t find a friendly welcome should they decide to return.”
“You would split the packs?” Rider asks. “After all we’ve been through to make peace, you would tear it all apart?”
“You’re giving me no choice,” Decker spits. “I can’t believe you don’t see that.”
“There is a legend that wolves can lose their power to a witch,” Kelta says. “He can lose the will to shift, and the urge to run the high mountains. He becomes dull, domesticated, and slow as she strips him of his magical essence.”
“See?” Decker shouts.
“Bullshit!” Jen yells back.
“It’s working out great for me,” Peter says, shrugging. “I’m more powerful than ever.”
“Yeah, you outran me the other day,” Rider says, chuckling. “And I think your wolf is even bigger than it used to be.”
“Lies,” Gladys hisses. “You’re just making excuses, trying to cover your petty mistake. We agreed to this meeting as a final straw. Make your decision, as we have made ours.”
“Can’t we at least talk about this some more?” Bae asks. “The witches aren’t evil. Before the coven left town, Amanda was pretty much a member of the pack. The others all have friends and family in town who are connected to all of us. These are people you’re talking about, not she-demons from hell.”
Decker makes a little scoffing sound as Gladys stomps her foot.
“You might let vermin run around in your town,” she says, “but did you ever ask yourself why we don’t have witches in Silverton?”
Even though the reaction of Bailey’s group is palpable, no one speaks.
I’m afraid to ask, too. Did they burn them all? Not a pretty thought.
“Choose, Alpha!” Decker demands, taking a step forward.
Bailey moves to face him, and they glare at each other, beginning to growl.
“Wait!” Kelta shouts, jumping between them. “I would like more talk on the matter. Bailey is a good alpha, and he would not lead us astray. Perhaps meeting the witches before we decide on any action is a reasonable thing to do.”
Something about her outburst seems insincere, but I can’t put my finger on why. When she glances over at me and then quickly looks away again, I’m even more confused.
Decker bares his teeth, his wolf simmering just beneath the surface of his human facade.
“I don’t agree,” he mutters. “But I won’t take any action.... not yet.”
“I think that’s wise,” says Belle. “We worked hard for peace. Let’s not shatter it in a few short hours, okay? It took months to build.”
“Unfortunately, that is the way of empires,” Jen says, her voice ringing with prophecy. “They take years to build… and seconds to crumble into dust.”