Chapter 39
Friday
Brooklyn
Matt knocked on the door again.
“Just one more minute,” I said. I knew it didn’t make any sense. My fresh start with my dad could begin any day. I just had this hope in my chest that it would be today. A clean slate. A new beginning. Today was the start of my future. Of my new forever.
He knocked again.
I knew I was making people wait out in the cold. I took a deep breath. I’d waited long enough. I pressed my lips together. My father wasn’t coming.
“Angel,” said a voice that was definitely not Matt.
My heart started racing. I quickly unlocked the door and opened it. My dad was standing there, smiling down at me.
“Dad?” My voice cracked.
He closed the distance between us and wrapped his arms around me. “You didn’t think I’d miss your wedding, did you?”
I laughed and pulled back. “Actually I did.” I hugged him again. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
He kissed the top of my head. “I didn’t think you wanted me here. That’s why I left. But then I got all your texts and voicemails. And a ton from Tanner. And one from Matt.”
“Matt left you a voicemail?”
“He did. Saying he forgave me.”
Oh, Matt.I knew how hard that must have been for him to do. Every day he surprised me more and more. I looked up at my dad. “I found the letters. That you wrote to my mom.”
He raised his eyebrows.
“Why didn’t you tell me that you changed your mind about wanting me?”
He didn’t say anything.
“I read all the letters that were in that box in mom’s apartment,” I said. “She never saw them. But I did. You regretted telling my mom to get rid of me. You wanted the three of us to become a family. Why didn’t you tell me?”
He exhaled slowly. “Because it was too late.”
“It wasn’t too late. I’m right here.”
“It didn’t make a difference…”
“It makes all the difference,” I said and hugged him again. “To me.”
He rested his chin on the top of my head and sighed. “I thought she’d gone through with it. I thought I was too late. And your mother wanted nothing to do with me. She returned every letter unopened.”
I hugged him tighter. I wondered how different my life would have been if my mom had opened one of the letters. If she’d forgiven him. Maybe, just maybe, she’d still be alive.
But there was no going back. No rewinding time, no matter how much we wished we could. I took a deep breath. “It just felt nice to know that I was wanted.”
“Of course I wanted you,” my dad said. “I loved your mom, more than I ever loved anyone. I didn’t even know what love was until I met her. All I wanted was to run away with her. I just…” his voice trailed off. “It took losing her to make me realize I couldn’t live without her. And then it was too late. I didn’t know you were alive. If I had, I would have come, Brooklyn. I would have done anything to be part of your lives.”
It was too late for him and my mom. But it wasn’t too late for us. He’d wanted me. And he’d shown up today simply because I needed him. It was the first time it felt like he had no ulterior motives. This was just…love. I pulled back again. “You didn’t need to make me think you were a monster, Dad.”
He shook his head. “When I married into the Cannavaro family, I was young and foolish. What I thought I wanted…” his voice trailed off. “I was a poor kid, from the wrong side of the tracks. I wanted power. And wealth.” He shook his head again. “But I was wrong. About all of it. I didn’t want this life.”
I didn’t realize he’d grown up poor. Like me. But I’d never wanted power or wealth because I’d been surrounded by love. My mom’s. My uncle’s. Miller’s. Matt’s. My father had gotten stuck in a terrible position because he’d never known love until he met my mom. And then it truly was too late.
“I just wanted your mom. And you.” There were tears in his eyes. “And I missed out on everything.”
“Not everything. You’re here to walk me down the aisle.”
He sniffed and smiled down at me. “You want me to walk you down the aisle?”
“That’s what dads do.”
He smiled. “I am so sorry, Brooklyn. I should have told you all this sooner. I’m not used to being…” his voice trailed off.
“Honest?”
He laughed. “Hmm. Maybe so. I need people to see me a certain way in this business. Well, not anymore I guess.”
“It really is done? You’re 100 percent out?”
“I am. I’m not letting the business ruin the rest of my life too. I don’t want to miss out on anything else.”
My father had done terrible things. Awful things. He was a murderer. I’d seen it with my own eyes. He’d done awful things to me, even if he was trying to protect me.
But I was done holding on to all that pain.
What mattered was that my father loved me. He was the only family I had left. And he’d given up his business, which was essentially his whole life, hoping that I’d let him be a part of mine.
I always thought at some point, my heart would be too broken to ever heal again. But it never happened. And my heart was big enough to forgive him. It was big enough to leave the past in the past. “No more lies. Or betrayals. Or secrets.”
He nodded. “I promise.”
“On that note. I do have some news.” I was pretty sure everyone outside already knew. And I didn’t want my father to find out from someone else. “I’m pregnant.”
His eyes grew round and they fell to my stomach.
I laughed. “I’m not really showing. Yet.” I placed my hand on my stomach. “I mean, maybe a little…”
“You look beautiful, angel.”
I smiled.
“Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?”
I shook my head. “No, not yet.” I wasn’t sure I wanted to know. This baby was a surprise. And I kind of liked the idea of keeping the sex a surprise too. “But I’m excited for you to meet him or her.”
“So you’re saying no more paying someone to take photos of my grandkid from a distance?”
I shook my head. “Definitely not.” I wanted him to be a part of our lives. He was right, he’d already missed out on so much.
“Well good,” he said.
“Good,” I agreed and nodded. I had no idea how long we’d been standing here, holding everything up. I looked over at the closed door.
“We should probably get out there. I know there’s someone who’s been waiting a very long time to marry you.”
I nodded.
My father put his arm through mine and walked us over to the door.
But I put my hand on the door before he could open it. “Wait.”
“Second thoughts?” he asked.
“Definitely not. But there is one more thing I need to know. Those contracts I signed when I was a teenager. What else was in them?”
“Just the usual stuff.”
“There was nothing usual about them. Was there anything else I should know of?”
“They were designed to keep my family safe. You safe.”
“And the relationship agreement?”
“Extended the courtesy to your significant other. I never terminated the one you had with Matthew. And I fulfilled my end of the bargain. I kept Matthew safe.”
Had he really? Because Matt kind of thought otherwise. “Matt mentioned you recently hired a hitman or something…”
My dad laughed. “I have many wet workers on my payroll. Had, I mean. Past tense. And I never hired anyone to hurt Matthew. Recently I hired a someone to follow him around to make sure he was safe after the Locatelli…incident. But he’s been dismissed now of course.”
Oh.My father thought I may have died in that car bomb. But he’d still protected Matt. I was thankful for that.
“Like I said, I kept Matthew safe all these years, despite any threats. I probably did things he didn’t even realize to ensure he was safe. Because I knew you would have wanted that.”
I honestly had no idea what he was referring to. And maybe it was best that I didn’t. If he’d done something in my absence to protect Matt, I was grateful. But I wasn’t done talking about those contracts. “We agreed to no more surprises. I want you to destroy the contracts.”
“Or you could just read them.”
I shook my head. “I don’t want a contract with you. I just want a normal father-daughter relationship.”
“It’s my duty to keep you safe…”
“Without a contract,” I said firmly.
He sighed. “Without a contract,” he agreed. “But you do have a prenup with Matthew, right?”
Was he serious? “Dad, no.”
“I really think…”
“No.”
He sighed. “Okay. Fine. No more contracts.”
“Thank you.” I’d never known my dad to be agreeable. But he seemed…different today. Definitely more relaxed. It was good that he’d stepped down. I was pretty sure that job was slowly killing him. And I’d only just gotten him back.
I took a deep breath. “Okay. Let’s do this thing. I’ve made Matt wait long enough.”
My dad opened the door.
The kids were running around the restaurant, but it didn’t take long for Justin to corral everyone by the doors.
“You look beautiful, Mommy,” Jacob said.
I crouched down in front of him. “Thank you.”
“Will you save a dance for me?”
Who had taught him to ask me that? I couldn’t stop smiling. “Of course. Are you ready? You have a very important job, sweet boy.” I gestured to the rings tied to the little pillow in his hand.
“Yessie.”
I kissed his cheek.
And then he turned to my dad. “I think I’m supposed to hit you again.”
My dad immediately put his hands over his junk.
I stifled a laugh. “We’re all going to start over and be friends.”
Jacob stared at my dad skeptically.
“A new beginning,” I said. “Everyone deserves a second chance. Especially family.”
Jacob scrunched his mouth to the side. “I already have an abuelo.”
“Maxwell?” my dad asked.
“I don’t know who that is,” Jacob said.
I smiled. Max was Mason’s dad. Jacob just knew him as Grandpa. Jacob was referring to Tanner when he mentioned his abuelo. Which felt like a long, confusing conversation for this moment.
“Well, how about you call me Nonno?” my dad said.
“Nooooooo nooooo,” Jacob said, drawing the no’s out in the adorable way I loved. “Okay. I’ll call you that. And be good so I don’t have to punch you.”
“Deal,” my dad said.
Justin whistled. “It’s starting!” he shrieked at the top of his lungs. He downed the entire contents of a mug of coffee and slammed it on a table. I was surprised the mug didn’t shatter.
He’d had way too much caffeine. But he had pulled everything off. I knew he’d be able to do it. I’d always known he was the best.
I squeezed Jacob’s shoulder and stood back up.
Justin opened the door. All the groomsmen had assembled right outside to escort the bridesmaids down the aisle. Kennedy walked out first and Mason looped his arm through hers. The door closed for a moment before Bee stepped out to walk with Rob.
I pulled the curtain a bit to the side to watch. The bridge, altar, and path up to it were beautiful. Everything was decorated similarly to Tanner’s apartment last night. White pumpkins, gold fall leaves, garland, and twinkle lights. Matt was standing at the altar, fidgeting with his cufflinks. He looked so nervous, but so sure at the same time. I let the curtain fall back into place.
James grabbed Penny’s hand as she walked out the door. But before it closed, Tanner stepped in.
“Just wanted to make sure everything was good…” his voice trailed off when he saw me. “Wow. Brooklyn.”
I smiled. “Everything is good.”
“You look exquisite.”
“Thank you, Tanner. Thank you for…everything.” I’d seen the decorations outside. They matched the ones in his apartment. And I knew he’d helped Justin pull all this off.
Tanner nodded and turned to my dad. “Thank you for coming, Richard. It means the world to me and my friends.”
“I wouldn’t have missed it. But thank you for alerting me so…obsessively.”
Tanner laughed. “I couldn’t let you miss it.” He clapped my dad on the back.
“It’s your turn, you big hunk of man meat,” Justin said.
Tanner grabbed Daphne’s hand. Everyone else that wasn’t in a couple had done the signature arm loop. I was pretty sure Tanner did it just to piss Rob off. Tanner escorted Daphne outside.
“Okay that’s our cue,” Justin said to Nigel and put his hand out for Nigel.
Nigel sighed. “No holding hands. We’ll just walk adjacent. And doesn’t that big stranger need to get outside?” He pointed to Donnelley who was just standing there with his arms folded across his chest.
Justin’s eyes grew round. “You! Get that gorgeous ass outside immediately. You’re ruining everything.” He slapped Donnelley’s butt.
Donnelley laughed.
And I couldn’t help but smile. I wondered if this was the first time they’d talked. It wasn’t a bad re-introduction after 16 years.
Donnelley looked at my father.
“It’s okay,” Mr. Pruitt said. “Go on out.” He nodded towards the door.
Donnelley winked at Justin and then walked out the doors.
As soon as the doors closed Justin squealed and spun toward me. “Did you see that?! He winked at me! What does it mean?! Does he remember me?” He started fanning himself. “I think he remembers. We did so much stuff in the closet. Not the figurative closet, I was way out, even though he was way in. The actual literal closet. We used to hook up in closets is what I’m trying to say…”
“I think he remembers,” I said.
Justin shrieked again. “He is the hottest man I’ve ever been with. Should I go talk to him? I think I should go talk to him…”
“Justin?”
“Yes?”
“I think it’s your turn to walk down the aisle.”
“Oh my God. You’re right. It’s such a tease move. He won’t be able to keep his eyes off me.” He spun toward Nigel. “Please, Nigel. Hold my hand. I want Donnelley as jealous as possible.” He put his hand out for Nigel.
Nigel sighed. “Put your arm though mine. Final offer.”
“Deal.” Justin slid his arm through Nigel’s and Nigel escorted him to the doors.
“And Brooklyn?” Justin said over his shoulder. “In exactly 30 seconds, the music will change. Send the ring bearer and flower girls out at 35. And you start walking 30 seconds after that. Or really just whenever they make it to the altar. So that all eyes are on you instead of on the adorable kids.” He patted Jacob’s head. “Okay?”
I nodded and then the door closed. I started counting but then my father pushed up his sleeve to look at his watch. My father had this covered, so I pushed the curtains aside again. Everyone seemed to be laughing at Nigel and Justin walking down the aisle. But I saw Donnelley staring. I smiled and looked back at Matt. He was laughing too.
I couldn’t help but smile.
“That’s 30 seconds,” my dad said. “Jacob, you and the girls are almost up.”
“Come on, Scarlett, come on, Sophie.” Jacob waved them over to the door.
The girls looked so cute in their frilly little dresses. They each had a basket filled with yellow rose petals.
And even though they’d practiced walking separately, Jacob put his arms out like he’d seen the other men do. Each girl linked an arm with Jacob. He looked like such a little stud between them.
“And 35,” my dad said and opened the door. “You’re on.”
Jacob escorted them both out the door. I could hear all the “aws” before the doors closed.
In 30 seconds I’d be walking down the aisle to Matt. It was weird. I thought I’d be nervous. But I’d never been more sure of anything in my life. I was about to marry Matthew Caldwell. I was going to be Brooklyn Caldwell. I’d remembered doodling that in my notebooks back at Empire High. I felt tears welling in my eyes. In a thousand years, I never thought today would come. But here we were. Together after everything in the world had tried to keep us apart. It felt like fate. Twisted and cruel fate, but fate nonetheless.
My dad peeked out the door. “They’re just about there.” He glanced at his watch. “Perfect timing too.” He put his arm out for me. “It’s time.”
I wasn’t sure how I was going to hold it together. I was already blinking fast to keep my tears at bay. But putting my arm though my dad’s calmed me down.
He opened the door and we stepped out.
I heard a few gasps. I wasn’t sure if it was because of my dress or because of my dad’s presence. I was too focused on the song that was playing. I recognized it right away. It was an instrumental string version of My Dirty Little Secret. Yeah, I was definitely not going to get through this without crying. Matt and I had been so busy, we didn’t have much time to think about music. But Tanner had mentioned something about handling it. He’d done this. Honestly, I wasn’t even sure a string version had existed before. He really could make anything happen.
The chairs were full of people, but I didn’t truly see any of them. My eyes were focused on Matt. He rubbed the tip of his nose with his index finger.
Our signal.I was smiling so hard it hurt.
Walking up to him right now, I couldn’t believe I’d stayed away for 16 years. I couldn’t believe all the pain I’d caused him. I’d spend the rest of my life making it up to him.
When I got closer, I realized there were tears in Matt’s eyes.
God, he was going to make me cry.
But I loved the way he was staring at me. Not like he was picturing me 16 years ago. But like he loved me right now. In this moment.
My dad and I stopped right in front of the altar. “Congratulations, angel.” He leaned down and hugged me.
Matt put his hand out for him.
My dad shook it. “Take care of my girl.”
“Always,” Matt said and then put his hand out for me.
I slid my hand into his and joined him in front of the altar. He cradled both my hands in his as he stared down at me.
“You look so beautiful,” he said.
“Matt, stop,” I whispered. “You’re going to make me cry.”
He blinked fast and cleared his throat. “I’m going to be promising the world to you, but I can’t promise not to cry.”
I laughed and squeezed his hands.
“Are the two of you ready?” the pastor whispered with a kind smile.
We both nodded. I’d only met him just a few weeks ago. But he’d married Matt’s parents. I couldn’t think of anyone better for this occasion.
“We’re gathered here today to witness the sacred union of Matthew and Brooklyn.” He kept going, but I barely registered his words.
I just kept staring at the man in front of me. I’d fallen in love with a boy. We’d both grown and changed so much. But we’d still found our way back to each other. And Matthew Caldwell was all man now.
“You’re shaking,” Matt whispered and inched a little closer to me.
“I’m just cold.”
He tried to release my hands so he could give me his jacket.
I held his hands tight. “Nope. We did not spend a fortune altering this dress just for me to cover it up.”
“But…”
“Don’t even think about it.”
He smiled.
The pastor cleared his throat.
We both turned to him.
“You have agreed to read your own vows, right?” he asked.
The crowd chuckled.
I was pretty sure this wasn’t the first time he’d asked us.
“Yes,” Matt said. He let go of my hands and grabbed a piece of paper from his jacket pocket. He slowly unfolded it and looked at me.
And I already knew he was going to make me cry.