Heartbreaker (Havenbrook #3)

Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

MAC

No, giving Hudson a challenge probably wasn’t my brightest idea. He thrived on them, just like I did. It was our greatest source of commonality as well as dispute. So, yeah, I hadn’t really been thinking when I’d walked away earlier today. And I hadn’t intended to play hard to get. Not really. It just…sort of happened.

I’d been at work now for hours, and every time the door swung open, my eyes snapped there like a magnet. Something that didn’t go unnoticed by my pain-in-the-ass sister.

“I don’t know why you don’t just call him up and invite him over here,” Will said from her perch at the bar. She’d come in to meet Finn after he got off, but a call from a supplier was holding him up.

“Like I’ve said to you no less than forty-seven times, I’m not gonna do that because—” I broke off with an irritated groan.

I didn’t want to say it again. I’d already said it enough. Had told Will how I’d felt completely and utterly inadequate compared to Hudson. He saved lives for a living. Fought for the safety and freedom of an entire fucking country. I got the local townsfolk their favorite alcoholic beverages and wiped down tables. Not exactly a level playing field.

“And like I’ve said to you an equal number of times, you’re the bravest, most compassionate, caring, and determined woman I know.”

“Honestly, would you?—”

“ I’m not done ,” Will snapped, slamming her hand on the bar top. Then she cleared her throat and continued on as if nothing had happened. “As I was sayin’, you run this bar when any of the three buffoons who own this place have prior commitments.”

“One of those buffoons is your fiancé,” I said dryly. “Another is his twin and your future brother-in-law.”

“And the other can spit in your food,” Nola, the third owner in the bar’s trio, said casually as she strolled by on her way to the kitchen, her silver lavender hair piled high on her head.

Will waved her off, unconcerned. “What I’m sayin’ is you know the ins and outs of this place as well as the owners do. You could run it with your eyes closed.”

“But I don’t because it’s not mine to run.”

Not to mention running—or even managing—a bar just…didn’t interest me. It was simply a way for me to pay my bills. The same as every other job I’d ever had.

“You de-escalate disagreements from the patrons and townsfolk on a daily basis.”

“Pretty sure that’s the booze,” I said dryly.

Will groaned and threw up her hands. “You always do this! You always dismiss your accomplishments.”

I blew out a frustrated breath. “Those aren’t accomplishments, Will. I’m not in the second-grade spelling bee, getting an honorable mention, for fuck’s sake. Life doesn’t work like that. I’m a bartender . That’s it. You don’t have to make it into something it’s not.”

“Okay, you want some concrete accomplishments? Fine. How about the kids you help turn around when you leave for weeks of the year and participate in Wilderness Bound? How many kids’ futures have you realigned doin’ that? How many people’s lives have you saved by teachin’ ’em wilderness skills? Hell, you saved our niece’s life—doesn’t that count for anything?”

My cheeks bloomed with heat despite trying desperately to tamp it down. It wasn’t that I was embarrassed, exactly. It was just that I really, truly hated being the center of attention, and Will had just placed a big ole spotlight on me and turned the thing on to full blast. Not to mention, she was loud as hell and starting to draw the interest of the others gathered around.

“That’s not?—”

“Don’t you dare say it’s not a big deal,” Will said, her voice steely as she pointed an angry finger in my direction.

I started to do exactly that when the door swung open again, my breath catching at who stood on the threshold. Lilah, Hudson’s younger sister, walked through the door, a guy I had never seen before strolling in behind her. He was tall and broad, thick muscles bunching under rich brown skin, his black hair and beard neatly trimmed close. He stood with the same kind of quiet authority Hudson did. Military, no doubt.

I’d heard whispers throughout the afternoon of the man Hudson had brought home—his copilot in the army. Too much of a coincidence for it not to be the same guy.

My stomach flip-flopped as I searched beyond the pair, both dreading and hoping Hudson would walk in behind them. But the door swung shut and stayed that way.

“Lookin’ for something?” Will asked, a know-it-all lilt to her voice.

“No.”

“Mhmm…you don’t want to see him, my ass,” she muttered into her wineglass.

“Shut up, or I’ll cut you off.” I delivered the words without heat, my focus on Lilah and the new guy as they strode up to the bar.

“Hey, Mac,” Lilah said, slipping onto a barstool one down from Willow, a broad smile on her face. Her dark hair was pulled back into a ponytail, the ends curled and bouncing. “Will. How’re y’all doin’?”

“Good, you?” I answered automatically.

Lilah definitely wasn’t the person to discuss all these confusing emotions fluttering around inside me with. Not when they centered on her brother.

“Not too bad. You meet Caleb yet?” She hooked a thumb in his direction as he sat down on her right, his arm going around the top of her high backed bar stool, his body bracketing hers. “He tagged along home with Hudson.”

“I haven’t.” I smiled to the newcomer and held out a hand toward him. “Nice to meet you. I’m Mac.”

“You’ll know her as Kenna,” Lilah cut in, “because my brother can’t be easy about anything.”

Caleb enveloped my hand in his, his eyes scrutinizing. After a long moment, he said, “So, you’re Kenna.”

He said it with such familiarity, my stomach fluttered. Familiarity from this man I’d never met before could only mean one thing—Hudson talked about me. A lot. But instead of focusing on it, I tucked it away, along with everything else today, and saved it for later.

I plastered on the smile that got me a buttload of tips, fake as it was sometimes. “Only to Hudson. I’m Mac to everyone else. Figured you’d have seen me earlier today. You didn’t catch the show?”

He shook his head. “Thought I’d give you guys some privacy.”

I snorted. “When you live in Havenbrook, you don’t get privacy.”

“Speaking of,” Will interjected, leaning forward and thrusting her hand out to Caleb. “I’m Willow Haven, Mac’s sister.”

Caleb took her hand and dipped his head. “Willow.”

No familiarity there, no automatic shortening of her name. Which meant Hudson didn’t talk about Havenbrook in the general sense. Just me.

But I wasn’t thinking about that right now.

“You can ignore her,” I said. “It’s how I’ve spent the past hour.”

“Lord, you’re such a damn grouch tonight,” Will said.

“Just to you, sister dearest.” I batted my eyelashes at Will before tossing coasters down in front of Lilah and Caleb. “Y’all need dinner menus too, or you just in for drinks?”

“Menus, please,” Lilah said.

I plucked them from beneath the bar. “What can I get y’all to drink?”

Lilah pointed to the chalkboard by the register proclaiming Campfire Crush as our featured beverage. “I’ll have the drink of the week, please.”

“You got it. How about you, Caleb?”

“Got any local IPAs on tap?”

“Sure do. Gimme a sec.” With a pat to the bar top, I turned and fell into the familiar movements, mixing and pouring as I ran a scrutinizing eye over the rest of the customers parked up to the bar, making note of who needed refills.

Once I’d placed Caleb’s and Lilah’s drinks in front of them, I made a circle at the bar, refilling drinks for a couple patrons before grabbing a bill to settle it.

I strode toward the cash register, near where my pain-in-the-ass sister sat, chatting with Lilah and Caleb. Or mostly Lilah. Caleb seemed to do a whole lot of watching and listening, especially where Lilah was concerned.

With my back to them as I focused on the POS machine, I asked, “So, where’s Hudson tonight?” And then immediately kicked myself. I didn’t care. Didn’t care at?—

“Miss me, Kenna?” At the sound of his deep voice, my entire body erupted in goose bumps, and I snapped my head toward him.

He slid onto the stool between Lilah and Will, propped his elbows on the bar top, and leaned toward me. “You know, you could’ve saved my ego a whole lot of bruisin’ if you’d told me your plans tonight meant you were workin’. I spent the past two hours—” He abruptly cut himself off, shaking his head and glancing down.

Spent the past two hours… what ? Trying to figure out how he was going to walk in and see me wasting my life away behind a bar? How he’d hide his disappointment at all I hadn’t accomplished in my life? At all I’d thrown away after he’d left?

Except…I hadn’t told him I was working here. Hadn’t told him about any of my random jobs over the years to save myself from hearing the long-distance disappointment in his response.

I furrowed my brow, cocking my head to the side. “You knew I worked here?”

He hummed in affirmation. “I hear you’re as much a draw as the atmosphere, booze, and burgers. Can’t talk to Momma without her mentioning whatever cocktail of the week you’ve thought up and how delicious they always are.”

How lovely. He was out dodging bullets and IEDs, and Marianne was jabbering to him about how I tossed a few ingredients together and came up with a catchy name so we could charge a buck more for the drinks. Definitely in the same realm. I shot Will a pointed look, which my sister studiously ignored.

“That’s…well…” I cleared my throat and tossed a coaster in front of him before grabbing a menu and handing it over. I wasn’t sure there was anything more humiliating than waiting on your ex-… something , who just so happened to be a real-life superhero, but if there was, I hadn’t yet lived it. “What can I get ya?”

“You know what I like.” The way he said it, all low and rough, brought me back to a night years ago when he’d used that same voice while he’d been inside me. Eyes locked with mine, hips rocking together, breath comingling between us…

My breathing quickened, my eyes never straying from his, and it felt like we were the only two people in the room.

At least until my sister squeaked and then tried to cover it up with a loud cough. Then Lilah said, “ Ew …is that your sex voice? For the love, Hud, don’t do that around me.”

That, of course, caused everyone else to break into laughter. Everyone except me.

I pressed my lips together in a bland smile, strangling my libido through sheer force of will. “Not sure I know what you like anymore.”

The thing with having spent a lifetime as best friends before Hudson had left meant he could read me, even after all this time. He stared at me for a long, tense moment, his eyes darting between mine, head cocked to the side. Studying. Assessing.

And God, I didn’t want him to read me. Didn’t want him to see how torn up I was about, well, everything. My life, my lack of accomplishments. Hell, my lack of ambition . My dismal love life and the fact that I still ached—physically ached—for his touch.

Worst of all, I didn’t want him to see how badly his leaving still hurt me. How deeply the wound had cut.

And apparently, all that was written on my face because he didn’t press.

With a tip of his head toward Caleb, Hudson said, “I’ll have what he’s having.”

I nodded and turned away, still able to feel his eyes on me as I filled a mug with the beer, but I didn’t dare meet his gaze. Once I dropped off his glass, I did another round, occupying myself by getting refills, clearing plates, and wiping down the bar top after a few people had cleared out.

I needed to make my way back to where the four of them sat to take their orders, but I didn’t really want to. And by the time I’d psyched myself up enough to do so, I was dragged into an argument between Atticus and Darcy, two Havenbrook residents with businesses in the Square.

“All I’m sayin’, Atticus, is to put your garbage cans where they belong and not in front of my coffee shop.”

“Your coffee shop doesn’t extend to the alley, which is exactly where the cans are.”

Darcy huffed. “But that alley is the perfect place for a couple outdoor tables, and my customers would like to enjoy their mornin’ coffee without smellin’ your nasty garbage!”

Atticus’s face had turned an obnoxious shade of red. “How about we go on over to town hall and talk to the mayor about what kind of permit you’d need for outdoor seatin’, ’cause I bet you didn’t get one.”

“Are you suggestin’ I’m not runnin’ my business on the up-and-up?” Darcy all but shouted.

“Hey now,” I cut in. “I’m sure we can come to an agreement that makes everyone happy.”

“The only thing that’ll make me happy is if she quits harpin’ on me to move my garbage cans. Where else am I supposed to put ’em? That’s exactly what the alley is for!”

Darcy slammed her hand down on the bar top. “Not anymore! Didn’t you notice the potted plants and decorations back there? Or, I don’t know, the lovely wrought-iron tables and chairs?”

Atticus shrugged. “Just figured it was more trash from your place.”

Darcy’s mouth dropped open.

Before either of them could go on, I held up a hand. “Take it easy, y’all. Atticus, do you think maybe your clients would like to enjoy a cup of coffee and read the paper while waitin’ for their furry loved ones to finish their grooming appointments with you?”

“I—” Atticus cut off and scowled. “A few customers may have mentioned something about going over there once or twice.”

“Mhmm. And Darcy, wouldn’t it be nice to bring in a steady stream of extra customers who would’ve maybe skipped it instead?”

Darcy crossed her arms. “I guess so.”

“So then wouldn’t you both agree that the shared alley could be a mutually beneficial space? Y’all can do an exchange—Darcy, you can offer his grooming clients their first cup of coffee for free if they’re waitin’ for their pets. And Atticus, you can offer five dollars off a grooming with receipt from Jitterbug.”

It took a bit more finesse and convincing, but by the time I walked away, Darcy and Atticus were all smiles, their heads close as they outlined their new mutual referral program.

“You’re good at that.” Hudson’s voice startled me as I walked back toward where the foursome had been sitting.

Except he’d left the group and sat completely apart from them now. Will had taken up his previous spot, chatting with Lilah and Caleb, though I wasn’t fooled. My sister had ears like a fucking hawk, and I had no doubt she was eavesdropping.

“Good at what?”

He tipped his head toward the two patrons who were now the best of friends. “Diplomacy.”

“That’s a soldier word if I’ve ever heard one. Around here, we just call it not bein’ an asshole.”

“Yeah, well. You’re good at gettin’ people not to be assholes, then.”

I lifted a single shoulder. “Sometimes.”

He stared at me, his eyes darting between mine. Dropping only once to my lips before snapping back up. I felt that drop all the way to my toes. “Come to supper with me tomorrow.”

“I can’t,” I said without hesitation, grateful I had the excuse of my shift at The Willow Tree to fall back on because I still wasn’t ready for this.

At least with the pact we’d made, I’d had time to prepare. I’d have been able to work myself up and figure out a game plan as to how it’d go when I saw him again. But this? This impromptu drop-in after a decade was too damn much for my brain—not to mention my heart—to handle.

“Plans again?”

“Yes.” I cleared empty mugs from the counter where several people had vacated. “My schedule’s done up for the next two weeks already.”

“When do you work?”

“Days vary, but I come in at four, and I’m here till midnight, usually. Sometimes later.”

“Breakfast, then. Lunch. You can’t work all day. Hell, Kenna, I’ll even take a coffee date, so long as I can spend some time with you. Let me.”

Gah—how was I supposed to say no when he was so enticing? How was I supposed to keep my head on and my heart protected when he was so damn compelling? So irresistible.

“She’s free tomorrow night!” Will called from her perch on the stool across the bar.

When I sent her a what the ever-loving fuck are you doing glare, Will gritted her teeth in what barely passed as a smile.

“Finn would be happy to cover so y’all can…hang out.”

I stared at my sister, my lips tight and hands fisted, communicating without words that she needed to knock this nonsense off right now. Will communicated right back, telling me all my worries amounted to a pile of shit and to get the hell out of my own way.

Except there was no way to get out of because there was no way anything was going to happen between me and Hudson. I’d already decided it, and that made it so.

“Well, sounds like it’s settled, then,” Hudson said, a smile tipping up his lips. “I get you for supper tomorrow night. And since your whole day just got freed up, how about breakfast, lunch, and coffee?”

My stomach somersaulted at the thought of that much uninterrupted Hudson time. “Greedy, aren’t you?”

He leaned toward me, so close I had to hold my breath just so I wouldn’t breathe him in. “When it comes to you? Always.”