Chapter Thirty
Although Theo was grateful for the presumed safety of the so-called “safe house” they were brought to, the isolation and surroundings both felt anything but. It was a serviceable space, barely. It did its job at looking nondescript by being just that—it was small, grungy, and equipped with black-out drapes that kept them in perpetual artificial light without a single ray of sunlight to be seen. The fridge was a relic from the eighties and appeared to have not been cleaned since then. The bathroom was more in line with the seventies, and he was pretty sure the mattresses and couch were bought new sometime in that era.
The carpeting and bedding were probably the newest things in the home, but the descriptor “new” wasn”t a very accurate one. Questionable stains marred both and the pervasive smell of mold and mildew hung heavy in the air. Theo’s asthma protested the change in location in an aggressive fashion. He was grateful for his past self having the presence of mind to lug the obnoxious nebulizer along with them during their evacuation. It had become a twice daily part of his routine just to keep him functioning.
The kids were trying hard not to complain, but the isolation and boredom was wearing on them more and more with each day that passed. The only break in the monotony came when the Secret Service would deliver food and any supplies they needed—once in the morning and again after nightfall. Take-out food was the only thing on the menu. McDonald’s lost its appeal by the end of day two. Pizza followed by the end of day four. Dawn, according to the digital clock taunting him from the nightstand, brought with it a pissed off Anna shrieking obscenities at a hapless agent as she cornered him in the living room. So much for the swear jar.
“No! This sucks. You suck. Your shitty food sucks! I want my phone. I want something to eat that doesn”t come in a greasy bag or box. And I want to go the hell home!”
Theo shuffled into the room and rubbed the poor sleep from his eyes. Once he could focus properly, the scene in front of him made him laugh, if only because manic laughter was better than hysterical crying. The agent looked positively flummoxed by the irate eight year old’s tantrum. Fear glinted in his eyes as she advanced with a raised index finger.
“I hate you. I hate this. Fix it! Do something! You realize it”s your fault we’re here, right?!” She stabbed her finger into the center of the man’s chest. Even despite the bullet-resistant vest under his polo shirt, he winced.
“Yes, ma’am. Just tell me what you want and I”ll get it.” The agent looked to Theo for guidance. He shrugged in response and turned back toward the dated kitchen. It was too early to deal with this shit, especially without coffee. The fact that it was freeze-dried instant coffee was just an insult added to the injury.
He probably should have corrected his little sister’s behavior, but he couldn”t be bothered. He had enough to worry about in keeping the kids from killing one another. Keeping his anxiety in check on top of that was a full-time job. Long hours of solitude and silence wreaked havoc on his mental state. When the only interruption to that silence was Anna and Toby bickering, he found himself caring less and less. As long as their fights didn”t turn physical, he left them to it. If anything, they could keep one another entrenched in battle and forget about the outside world for a little while.
He stirred his coffee dispassionately, staring vacantly at the cracked tiles of the backsplash without seeing them. He”d already memorized every broken piece and mismatched fix. Same with the imperfections of the countertop. And the floor. He tossed the spoon in the scuffed, stained sink with a sigh. The front door opened and closed, causing the hair on the back of his neck to stand at attention. He listened and heard only silence. At least the agent had escaped any more of Anna’s wrath.
He picked at the loose edge of the countertop with his thumb. Snap. Snap. Snap. The sound was so loud in the otherwise quiet house. He found himself making all sorts of noise now. Repetitive, annoying sounds to fill the gaping holes and fend off the intrusive, paranoid thoughts that routinely infiltrated his mind. It was hard not to let the paranoia take hold. Every sound from outside became an enemy. Every sound inside was an intruder. He started hearing sounds that weren”t even there, too. That was perhaps the scariest of all. When he wasn”t able to trust himself, it became a lot harder to find peace. He already couldn”t trust basically everyone outside himself. Losing the ability to trust his own mind frightened him as much, if not more than the threats from outside himself.
The only tiny solace he found in his days was reading. He was exceptionally fortunate to have found a copy of Connor’s favorite book accidentally left in the front pocket of his backpack. He remembered the day it had been squirreled away there during a picnic. It was so long ago, it felt like another lifetime. The book was well-loved—cracked spine, scuffed cover, and dog-eared pages. Connor read it over and over, calling it a comfort read. Theo wasn”t surprised he hadn”t missed this copy. He gifted Connor a brand new boxed set of the series for their first Christmas together.
Theo was never a big reader, but he clung to Connor’s book like a lifeline ever since he stumbled upon it in his backpack. So far, he”d read through the entire thing four times. Every morning, he’d start at page one and flip through the pages throughout the day, finally putting it aside late, late at night when exhaustion took over and forced him to succumb to the nightmares that marked night. TJ Klune’s Lightning Struck Heart could only do so much to fend off the demons hiding behind Theo’s eyelids.
It was getting harder and harder for Theo to function. Day five felt more like day fifty-five as he paced the small living room, pausing at every sound, imagined or otherwise. Only digital clocks marked the passage of time, but the scenery never changed. He didn”t dare look through the blinds for fear of what might be lingering on the other side. Ignorance was bliss, even if it gave his mind free reign to fill in the gaps with enemies of all shapes and sizes.
As afternoon melted into evening, according to the clocks, Theo gave up trying to read and dumped the last of his cold coffee down the drain. Caffeine was never a good idea for people living with anxiety, but it was better than the all-consuming exhaustion that being perpetually on high alert plagued him with. He searched the house and found the kids in various stages of ennui. Toby was throwing a baseball up into the air while laying on his back on the floor of their shared bedroom. Anna was rereading a magazine from the late 2000s on the bed. For now, they weren”t picking fights with one another, so Theo slipped into the bathroom to shower. At least it would break up the doldrums for a little while.
The tired old house had an equally tired old water heater, so he could never languish in the shower for too long. Still, the warmth helped ease some of the rock-hard tension from his neck and shoulders as he went through the motions. He’d given up trying to stir any sort of interest in self-pleasure in his body. It wasn”t the same without his partner and the frustration of trying to climb that mountain to revel in the free fall was just exhausting. He cursed himself softly as he slid a hand over his dick and found it flaccid and disinterested, again.
He turned into the stream and let the water sluice over his face. It drowned out the make-believe sounds and replaced it with white noise and nothingness, accented only by his pulse pumping in his ears, always just this side of too fast. Despite the noise of the water, a door slamming elsewhere in the house had him flinching and rushing back to the real world. His hand slapped the tap off and he honed all his concentration on listening.
Nothing else jumped out at him. The harder he listened, the less he heard. Nevertheless, his anxiety was triggered and he crept out of the shower and grabbed his towel from the rack just outside the stained plastic curtain. He wouldn”t settle down until he had eyes on the kids again. With the terry cloth cinched tight around his waist and the droplets still coursing down his torso from his drenched hair, he padded across the room and poked his head into the hall.
“Anna? Tob?”
“Dinner”s here! Come eat!” His little sister’s voice carried through the space between them and eased some of the worries. Barefoot, he tread down the hallway and peeked into the kitchen.
“We got Mexican tonight! You”re welcome. I knew yelling at the agent would work.” Anna and Toby had their backs to him as they huddled around a plastic take-away bag. His body went instantly rigid as a creak in the floorboards behind him caught all his attention. An all too familiar ominous click came immediately after, but it was too late.
He gasped as cool metal tapped his temple. He whimpered as an arm slipped around his waist. The tip of a blade pressed against his sternum as the hold around him tightened. Immediately, terror froze him in place as every worst case scenario he had imagined distilled into a laser-focused real life nightmare.
“Hello, kids. We’re going to play a game. Simon Says. Do you know it?” Hot breath scented with cigarette smoke washed over his cheek.
“Run!” Theo put every drop of urgency into his scream, twisting in place to connect his forehead with the man who was holding him tight. It was reckless and dangerous but in that flashpoint moment, all he was concerned about was the kids.
Anna and Toby had both pivoted in place at the sound of the voice. She shrieked, but Toby”s response was faster. Theo was helpless as he watched his little brother shove Anna toward the front door, positioning his body as a shield in front of her.
“Run, Anna!” Toby shouted, advancing to keep the man from getting a clear view of the little girl as she scrambled with the dead bolt. The knife against Theo’s chest slid higher, coming to rest against the swell of his Adam’s apple.
“Tsk, tsk. Bad idea.” The gun left Theo’s temple and appeared in his line of sight. Without thinking, he reached his hands out and forced it to swing wider just as the man pulled the trigger. Despite the silencer affixed to the barrel, the shot echoed through the space as the wood paneling of the wall splintered apart. Toby went still, wide-eyed and panicked. Thankfully, the distraction worked. The front door was wide open and Anna was nowhere to be found.
“Let him go. Please?” Toby held his hands up. The trembling in them was visible even across the space that separated them.
“Not tonight. And Simon didn”t say run.” The tip of the knife pierced the base of Theo’s throat. His hands flew up to grab the man”s wrist in a desperate act of self-preservation. “Next time you fuck up our game, he bleeds more. Understood?”
“Run.” Theo mouthed the words silently, trying to force Toby to flee. He listened, but not in the way Theo had hoped. Instead of running away, Toby ran toward them. Theo’s body convulsed in terror as the tip of the blade sank deeper and sliced downward between his collarbones. The gun swung forward and aimed straight at Toby. The blood-curdling sound of the hammer clocking brought a strangled sob to Theo’s lips. Hot rivulets of blood coursed over his ice cold skin, but he didn”t feel the pain of the wound. He only felt bone-chilling fear for his little brother.
“We’re going to go for a little ride. Behave, and he’ll live.” The knife pressed deeper into the center of Theo’s chest and forced another cry from his lips.
“Shit, shit, shit… okay! Okay, please just stop!” Toby’s bravado crumpled as tears flooded his cheeks. “I’m sorry. Please, don”t hurt him!”
“There’s zip-ties in the bag. There”s a car outside. Simon says get the ties. If we all work together, this will be lots of fun.” The man gestured toward the bag of food with the barrel of the gun. “You should hurry. The little girl really fucked up our game.”
Toby staggered toward the bag and upended it, dumping containers onto the floor in his haste. Once he had the zip-ties in his hand the man forced Theo to stumble forward. Every step twisted the blade a fraction deeper.
“Simon says zip-tie Theo’s wrists together.”
Toby’s eyes filled with more tears as he did what he was told. A soft mantra of “I”m sorry” filled the air between them as he struggled with the task. A sob broke from his lips as he tightened the plastic binding.
“Very good job. Now, Simon says hand one to him and turn around.”
Theo could barely manage to grip the thin tie for how hard his hands shook. His heart shattered into a million pieces as Toby turned his back to him and crossed his wrists behind his back. A sharp tap of the silencer against Theo’s temple had him flinching as his throat seized and his breathing became shallower and harder.
“Simon says bind his hands, Theo. You know the drill.”
Theo managed to secure Toby’s wrists, only tightening the tie enough to make it look plausible. He hoped it was enough but not too much. It was all he could do in this increasingly impossible position they were in.
“Simon says let”s go for that drive. Now.” The gun reappeared and tapped against the back of Toby’s head. “Simon says don”t run. Or else.”
They shuffled toward the open door and stepped into the cool night air. Everything was too dark after the artificial light from inside and Toby hesitated for a microsecond. The man forced him forward with a shove of the barrel against Toby’s shoulder. He stumbled forward and almost fell before regaining his footing and reaching the car. Panic overwhelmed Theo as the man reached around to pop the hatchback of the SUV, revealing two dead bodies in the too-bright illumination provided by the interior lights.
“Simon says get cozy.” A shove to Theo’s back forced him forward, his bound hands catching his fall and instantly growing damp with the blood from the body he landed on. Another strangled sob fell from his lips as the man forced him to climb onto the victims. Toby whimpered beside him as he did the same.
Metal jangled too loud in the deserted street, and then Theo found himself being handcuffed to the body beneath him. Toby fought against the man as he tried to capture his wrist, but he stopped resisting as the overhead lights glinted off the edge of the blade before it disappeared into the meat of Theo’s thigh. His scream bounced off the surrounding buildings before Toby’s shout of protest eclipsed it. Just as fast as it had sunk into his leg, it was pulled free again, and the blood seeped from it in an instant to stain the towel that had fallen loose in his climb into the car.
“I”m not fucking around, kid.” The man”s voice had Theo looking up to get the first glimpse of his assailant. He looked familiar, like some brief distant memory tickling at his subconsciousness, but he couldn”t pin the man’s identity. He was bearded, gaunt, tall, and murderous in appearance. Only once Toby was handcuffed to the other body did he step back and reach up toward the hatch.
“Sit tight, kids. We’ll be there before you know it.”
The door slammed closed and took the light with it. Plunged into darkness, what little hope Theo had clung to disappeared. A wrecked sob fell from his lips as the last of his fight instincts evaporated. The darkness became even darker as his eyelids slipped closed in defeat. This was the end. He knew it in his core. There was no point fighting it any longer. Fighting hadn”t gotten him anywhere in the long run. Fighting had only gotten his brother placed in the crosshairs. Defeat was a whole lot easier to accept when the enemy would always be stronger.