24. Chase
Chase
If I wasn’t in love with Gem before Christmas I certainly am after.
She made what could have been a very difficult few days into a happy time even if there were tears shed.
Mom and Dad had obviously been preparing for her not living to see Christmas because with each of our gifts was a letter. They are written in Mom’s hand, but I can tell they both had input. And I think if we were given the notes and presents before, when Gem first became aware of them, it would have torn us all to ribbons.
But with the months between us and losing them, with Gem at our sides, we were able to accept the heartfelt words and gifts from our parents with as much happiness as sadness.
And it’s her thoughtfulness, her ability to understand and know what we need, that has me more in love with her.
But the holidays have been and gone months ago. It’s now mid-February and life is great. Except for one thing.
I’m in love with my wife and she doesn’t have a clue.
“Hey!” With a big grin on his face, Gannon Byrd pops in front of the treadmill I’m running on.
I’m breathing hard, too hard to talk, so I tip up my chin in greeting.
“Can I ask you something?” His grin doesn’t slip exactly but he’s definitely unsure about his question. Or maybe it’s the answer.
Reaching up, I press a few buttons, and the treadmill begins to slow beneath my feet. I’ve been running for over an hour, which is more than my usual daily run, but after the indulgences of the holidays I need to work a little harder to burn off all those extra calories.
Besides, the extra exercise has helped my game. In the last few months, I’ve only let in a handful of goals. Which puts the Rogues firmly in the top spot in our conference.
Gannon waits until I’m at a brisk walk before talking again. “So, I heard something, and I’m not sure if you’re aware of it or not or if maybe I’ve misinterpreted the situation.”
“Okay.”
“I thought you were taking care of your sisters.”
I frown. “I am.”
“Yeah, I get that but…” His frown matches mine.
“Just spit it out.” My tone is a little harsh, but I don’t have time for this circling around what he wants to ask thing.
“I heard you live with the Rogues GM, Natalie Redding.”
“We do.”
“So, you’re what?” His left eyebrow rises, his face twisting in confusion now. “Dating the GM?”
“No.” I don’t elaborate. I want to say no, we’re married, have been for three months, but that’s a taboo subject, even between me and Gem.
“But you live together?”
“We share a house because she helps me with my sisters.”
“Like friends?” Confusion is still written all over his face and I want to laugh except the situation isn’t funny.
It’s become downright depressing if I’m honest. The woman I’m in love with, the one I’m married to, is nothing more than…
“Yes. We’re friends.”
“Huh.”
“Do you have a problem with that?”
“What? No! It’s just, the way Lindberg talked I thought maybe you two were together.”
“We’re raising my sisters together.” When his eyebrows rise into his hair, I explain. “We’re all that’s left of our family. I’m the only adult the girls have to take care of them. Gem offered to help me by becoming their second guardian.”
“Ah…okay.” He shakes his head. “Sorry. It’s just that I’ve seen the two of you since I was traded in and I have to say, as a stranger, it looks like more than that.”
“Is Lindberg the only one talking about it?” I’d hate it if the team was talking behind my back. And Gem would…I don’t know how she’d react if people were gossiping about us, but I know she would not be happy.
“Yeah. He told me all about the players and staff. Before the trade. Before I told him I’d be interested in playing down here.”
“That makes sense.” To change the subject I ask, “So how do you like it here? Happy you made the move?”
“Yeah.” He reaches up and fingers the ring that hangs from a chain around his neck. “I left some things behind, but I’ll get those here soon enough and then there’s nothing tying me to New York.”
“Things?”
“Just a few. One.” He turns away and swallows and I don’t know if I should push him but before I can he turns back and offers me another grin. “I’ll catch you later.”
He’s gone before I can switch off the machine. “Well, that was weird.”
“Who are you talking to, Hawkins?”
Stepping off the treadmill, I spin in Coach Alcott’s direction. “No one. Just muttering to myself.”
“Did I see Gannon in here?”
“Yep. He just left.”
“Dammit. I was hoping to catch up with him.” He rubs at his jaw. “He’s been here weeks and other than yelling at him on the ice, I think we’ve said four words to each other.”
“Oh?”
He eyes me. “Oh, you probably aren’t aware. He’s my best friend. Since college. Not sure why he’s avoiding me.”
“Probably finding the shift from best friend-teammate to best friend-player-coach hard.”
“Yeah, I guess that could be it. Although it feels like he’s avoiding me.”
My watch beeps. “Is there anything you need me for? I need to get changed and pick up Candace.”
“No. Only came in to see if I could catch Gannon.”
“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“You ready for it?”
“As ever.”
“Can we expect another?—”
“Don’t say it.” I shake my head. I’m not superstitious but I know a lot of guys are. “You know better than that.”
He grins. “I do. But you know I’m wishing for it.”
“You and me both. And, like always, I’ll do my best to make both our wishes come true.”
“Thanks.” He claps my shoulder then heads off the way he came.
I grab a towel and wipe the sweat from my face. I’m about to get another to clean the equipment when one of the equipment guys rushes in.
“I’ve got it.”
I smile. It’s so different having people clean up after me. I’ve always done it myself. Even in college when some of the younger guys were assigned the job of keeping the school gym clean, I preferred to do it myself.
Of course, as Gem pointed out when I mentioned it to her, doing it here means I’m taking someone’s job. “Thanks.”
“There are fresh towels in the locker room.” He holds out his hand for the one I’m slinging around my neck.
“Yeah, okay.” I lower my arm and drop it into his outstretched hand. “Didn’t want to drip over the floor on the way there.”
“Don’t worry about that. Cash has that job this week.”
I smile.
When Gem told me Coach Watts’ nephew was going to be working for the team the rest of the season while staying with his aunt and uncle, I was confused. He’s only a year or so older than the twins. But she quickly pointed out he’s homeschooled, and it doesn’t matter where he is, he can still attend school.
He’s a good kid. Works hard when he’s here. Keeps to himself though. I don’t know the story, but I heard his mom recently got sick—too sick to care for her teenage son—so he’s spending a year with his dad.
Mason Watts is a legend. Like his father before him and his brother Sutton after him. Actually, the whole family are legends. Coach Watts has Olympic Gold and now she owns a team in the NHL. The same league her younger brothers play in.
Yeah, the Watts family is hockey royalty and I’m sure Cash being here is part of his grooming to follow in his family’s footsteps.
My watch beeps again and I quicken my pace. I need to get that shower and change so I’m not late grabbing Candace.
The locker room is empty when I get there and I strip off in front of my bag, leaving my gear on the floor, and head for the showers. It’s always weird being in here alone. The quiet. It’s rare too. Working out extra these last few months means I’m often the only one using the facilities in the afternoons.
Unless it’s a home game day. Then the guys are in here prepping for the game.
Aware of how close I’m cutting it, I don’t waste time washing off. I want to get Candace and be home before the twins get there. We’re quickly heading toward the final weeks of the regular season and at this point there’s no way we’re missing a spot in the playoffs.
Which means less time with the girls because there isn’t a chance in hell I’m going to sit on my ass and cruise through the games. Nope. I’m going to pull out all the stops and that means extra training.
Shutting off the water, I grab a towel and rub myself dry. I’m so used to being in the locker room without clothes on that it doesn’t even occur to me to wrap the towel around my waist when I’m done.
That’s why I find myself walking, dick swinging, through the middle of an empty room when the door opens.
Gem, head down, gaze on her phone walks in, talking as she lifts her eyes. “Hey, I’ve got to stay?—”
Her words stop. Her feet stop.
As the door swishes shut behind her, she stares at me like I’m a alien who’s here to abduct her.
And my dick gets hard instantly.
It always does when she’s around, or I think of her, so most of the time I’m sporting at least a semi. But in the interest of keeping us on the track we set months ago, before Christmas—the friends track—I brazen it out and pretend like I’m not standing in front of her naked, dick now at full attention.
“Hey. What’s up?” I keep walking to my bag, bend over and rummage around for my underwear. I come up with my shirt first. That’ll do.
I’ve got my arms in the sleeves, above my head when I realize she still hasn’t spoken. I glance at her, find her gaze glued to my bare butt, and try to hide my smile.
Oh, yeah, we might say we’re just friends but the way she’s looking at my ass as though she wants to take a bite out of it says different.
“You okay?” I ask. Keeping my arms above my head, eyes on her, I turn. “Gem? Did you want something?”
“I, um,” she stammers when she’s faced with a full frontal, and I sink my teeth into the inside of my cheek to keep from grinning.
There have been days when I thought the only thing I’d ever have with this woman is what we have now. A marriage on paper only and parenting responsibilities of my sisters. But seeing her speechless as she checks me out—stares at my dick—tells me there’s hope.
Hope I never imagined was more than wishful thinking—and a million fantasies envisioned while getting myself off.
But that look, the way she’s swallowing repeatedly and can’t seem to get a word out says I can do more than hope.
I can plan.
“Gem?” I duck my head and slip my shirt over it. Pulling it down my torso I don’t care that it gets caught up on my hard dick. Or that she can’t take her eyes off it. “Did you want something?”
“Um. Yes. I...” She swallows again, then licks her bottom lip and my dick twitches at the thought of her using that tongue on me.
I turn and dive back into my bag, this time coming up with my underwear. And because I’m more than happy to torture us both, I drop them on the bench next to my bag and go searching for my shorts.
“Do you, um.” In my peripheral vision I see her shake her head. “Sorry. A lot on my mind. Do you want me to get Candace? I have a conference call later that I’ll take at home so I can have dinner with the girls.”
Shorts in hand, I turn to face her. “I was going to get her and be home when the twins are. I want to spend some time with them before playoffs start.”
“That’s weeks away.”
“Not many.” And because I’m enjoying this moment, I put my hands on my hips, my long fingers pointing to my erect dick. “And we both know we’re making them.”
She holds up a hand, fingers crossed.
“Don’t need that.”
Her mouth turns up in a small smile. “So confident.”
“Shouldn’t I be? We’re playing great hockey. I’m playing great hockey. The best of the season. Things seem to have gotten better since Byrd came on board.”
“Yes. You are. The team is. Especially Byrd.”
“I hate saying it, but Lindberg getting traded back to New York was a definite win for us.”
She looks at her phone when it rings. “I need to take this.”
I nod. I still haven’t put my pants on and at this point I don’t think I will until she leaves the locker room. “I’ll get Candace.”
“I’ll still be home early.”
“All right. Maybe we can head out for dinner. Give the girls a treat before we get busier than busy with the end of season and the playoffs.”
“Sounds good.” Her gaze drops and I realize since she started talking again her eyes haven’t dipped below my chin. “I’ll, um… Okay, I need to go.”
She spins on her heel and yanks the door open. And just because I’m having more fun and feeling more hopefully than I have in months when it comes to my wife I call out, “Hey, Gem?”
When she twists her head around her gaze is already angling down and I grin. “Y-yes.”
“Thanks for offering to pick up Candace.” It’s a bullshit statement. I stopped thanking her for helping with the girls at Christmas, but it’s all that comes to mind to get her attention on me again.
“Of course.” She frowns, her hand on the door handle. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
I grin full on now. “Oh yeah, totally loving it.”
She lets out a huffed laugh. “Put some pants on and go get our girl.”
My laughter follows her into the hallway. And I’m still smiling when I’m dressed and shouldering my bag.
My wife is not unaffected by me.
It’s a revelation and a salvation. Because if I had to keep living with this unrequited attraction bullshit, I’d die from blue balls.
Now, instead of sneaking in a tug session with my wife as inspiration making me feel guilty, I can do it with the knowledge that she’s probably—hopefully—doing the same.