Ice Cold Hearts: A Single Mom, Hockey, Reverse Harem Romance (Forbidden Fantasies)

24. Ian

Ican sense something is wrong the minute I hear the door open. Alexei’s footsteps are almost as heavy as they are on the anniversary of his parents’ death. Not even Oliver can break through the walls of his grief that day. I can’t even hear Emily’s footsteps. There’s always the squeak of a sneaker, the slap of a flip-flop, the clack of a heel, or the patter of bare feet on hardwood. She has a heavy, purposeful step. It’s one of the things I love about her. She’s a woman who’s not afraid to take up space.

I can’t hear anything now. There’s no sound of feet, no humming, no rustling of clothing, or even suppressed giggles like when she and Audrey try to sneak up on us. It’s like she’s determined to make herself invisible by not taking up any space at all.

When she comes into the room flanked by Alexei, I’m immediately glad that Audrey is in the kitchen with Oliver having a pre-dinner snack. Emily’s face is tight, her shoulders droop, and her eyes dart around the room anxiously like she’s a prey animal.

“Emily,” I say, standing up. “What happened?”

She bursts into tears and launches herself at me, hitting my chest with an audible thump. It’s not long before my shirt is damp from the force of her sobs.

I meet Alexei’s eyes and raise my brows.

He sighs wearily. “I’ll fill you in later. Just take care of her.”

“Okay.” I nod. “Oh, before you disappear, Audrey’s in the kitchen with Oliver. If you’re up for it, can you keep her in there for a bit so things can settle a little more? If you’re not up for it, can you just pass along the message?”

Alexei grunts and turns away from the steps and heads toward the kitchen. I decide to take that as a yes.

Emily’s knees buckle, and now I’m supporting her full weight. She doesn’t protest when I scoop her into my arms and settle us onto the sofa. Her body trembles so hard I can hear her teeth chattering.

It takes some maneuvering, but I manage to tug a blanket from the back of the couch and tuck it around both of us. Between me and the warmth of the blanket, her shaking slows then stops altogether. She hasn’t stopped crying, but it’s more like a spring drizzle than a torrential downpour.

“Audrey, wait!” Oliver calls.

It’s too late. Audrey bursts into the living room and wedges herself between us. Both of us scoot over to make room for her.

“Mama, did you know that Uncle Oliver gave me some cheese crackers as a snack? And then I got to have some grapes too.” She looks up at Emily and touches one of the tears on her face. “You’re sad. You hungry? You want me to ask Uncle Oliver to bring you some cheese crackers so you feel better? Maybe your belly hurts? I don’t know where the medicines is, though. Or does your belly hurt because you have to” —her voice drops to a whisper— “P. O. O. P?”

Emily gives a hiccupy laugh.

“No, baby, I’m not hungry. I don’t need any medicine, and I don’t need to go to the bathroom. It’s so nice that you’re worried about me, but Mama’s okay.” She sniffles. “You know how sometimes you feel sad in your heart?”

“Like when Princess Fettuccine’s arm got ripped off at the playground?” she asked.

“Yes, just like that.” Emily nods. “But this time, when I was leaving work with Uncle Alexei, there were a lot of people around me and they didn’t give me space for my body.”

“Did you sing the boundaries song that Teacher taught me?” Audrey asks.

Emily shakes her head. “No, but I did ask them to give me some space and they didn’t listen, and that made me sad.”

Audrey nods sagely. “Brittany did that last week at school. I held up my stop sign and she didn’t listen, and I cried too, so I had to get Teacher to help me.”

“I’m so glad your teacher was there to help you.” She smiles. “Did you feel better after talking to your teacher?”

“Not right away, but I did once all my cries were gone,” Audrey replies.

“Good.” Emily gives Audrey a loud smooch on her cheek. “That’s what I’m doing right now, just like you did with your teacher. Uncle Ian was helping me get all my cries out. There’s nothing to worry about, Pumpkin. I’m feeling better already.”

Seeing her take the time to explain her feelings in a way Audrey could handle while still staying the adult in the situation brings an ache to my chest. My father was in the military and had seen a lot of ugly things in his life. We traveled with him when we could, but he was deployed elsewhere a lot. Every time he came back, he got quieter and quieter. He did his best, but he wasn’t exactly the best at modeling emotional regulation. He was either closed off completely or holed up in the basement or garage of whatever house we were in at the time, taking out his trauma on a punching bag.

Mom wasn’t much better. She was an anxious woman on a good day, but when Dad was gone, there was no room in the house for anyone else’s feelings, not even her son’s. She’s doing better and finally started going to a therapist. Even so, I’m glad she and Dad are stationed half a world away.

There’s a tug on my sleeve.

“Scuse me, Uncle Ian, I was asking you something.” Audrey says.

“I’m sorry, Little Pea, I didn’t hear you. Can you say it again?” I ask.

“Do you have bubble bath?” she repeats.

I look over at Emily, but she just shrugs.

“I’m not sure,” I answer honestly. “Why?”

She looks at me like I’m the stupidest creature on the planet.

“Mama got all her cries out,” she says slowly, “so she needs a bubble bath. When all your cries are done, your mom gives you a bubble bath. Nana’s not here, so I think it’s okay if you do it.”

“Audrey, honey, that’s very sweet, but I don’t need a bubble bath,” she protests.

I shake my head. “Uh-uh, rules are rules. When your cries are done, you have to have a bath.”

“All right,” Emily says resignedly. “If I have to have a bath, I need an Audrey sandwich first.”

Audrey squeals as we wrap our arms around each other and squeeze her tightly in the middle. We blow raspberries on her cheeks until she starts wriggling.

She giggles. “No more! No more!”

We let her go, and she pops up off the couch and immediately puts her hands on her hips.

“Bathtime, Mama,” she commands.

Emily looks scandalized, but I just laugh. “I guess Uncle Alexei’s rubbing off on her a bit, huh?”

“Apparently,” she says dryly.

“Oliver, Alexei, stop lurking behind the door and come play with Audrey so Emily can take a bath,” I call.

Oliver slinks in guiltily, but Alexei saunters in with his head held high like he hadn’t just been caught eavesdropping.

Some things never change.

“We’ll take it from here,” Alexei insists. “You go take care of Emily.”

“Give her extra bubbles,” Audrey orders, then as an afterthought adds, “Please?”

I wink. “I think I can manage that.”

She shoos us to the stairs, giggling the whole way.

“That little lady really is something else,” I say, turning on the faucets.

“Something rotten, you mean.” Emily shakes her head.

“She’s just assertive, that’s all,” I protest.

“Don’t I know it.” She laughs dryly. “That’s going to serve her well when she gets older, but it definitely complicates things right now.”

“That’s true,” I agree, “but her heart’s in the right place, at least.”

“Are you always this much of an optimist?” Emily accuses.

“Only when I’m around you,” I say, then steal a kiss.

She tries to hold me there, but I pull away.

“No, ma’am,” I say sternly. “The boss said a bubble bath, and that’s what we’re going to do.”

I rummage around under the sink looking for bubble bath, but I’m coming up empty.

“I’m afraid we don’t have any bubble bath. We might never have had it, to be honest, but we do have some bath salts,” I say, showing her the bag. “They’re lavender. That’s relaxing, right? I don’t want Audrey to fire me.”

Emily laughs. “I think that’s a good substitute for bubbles.”

“Fantastic.” I smile. “And it looks like the tub is just about full too.”

“You don’t have to stay,” she says. “I’m fine now.”

“And if I want to stay?” I ask.

“Then I’d accuse you of sticking around just to see me naked.”

“That’s half true,” I admit.

“So, what’s the other half?”

“The other half thinks that if you talk about what happened, you’ll feel a lot better than fine, and this is about as private as we’re going to get with Audrey still awake.”

“All I’d have to say would just be complaining, and I don’t want to put you in a bad mood,” she protests.

“Do you remember that day we had that talk in my room?” I ask.

“Vaguely, why?”

“You said you wanted to do life with me and that when I have a problem, you do too.”

She smiles softly. “I didn’t think I’d made that much of an impact.”

“You’ve tattooed yourself all over my heart,” I say, tucking her hair behind her ear. “I don’t think you understand how much of an impact you’ve made on me, on all of us, really.”

I kiss her with my heart on my lips. She pulls me closer. The feel of her tongue tracing across mine brings to mind the ways she’s able to please me when her lips are wrapped around my dick. I moan as her hands slide down my chest to the waistband of my jeans. When I pull away, she’s actually pouting.

“Plenty of time for that later,” I say. “Now, are you going to get undressed or am I going to have to put you in the tub fully clothed?”

She huffs. “I’ll get undressed.”

I don’t hide my stare as she strips down. My eyes rake over her ample breasts, the curve of her waist, and her full hips. I’m desperate to drop to my knees and taste her pretty little pussy, but I know she needs to talk about what happened more than she needs sex right now.

She moans in contentment as she slips into the large sunken tub.

“I was wrong in the living room.” She sighs. “I did need this.”

I sit on the ledge of the tub behind her and slide my feet into the water.

“Are you joining me?” Her voice is sultry.

“Not quite,” I say. “Lean forward.”

She practically purrs as I start working through the knots in her back, making me seriously regret deciding to get her to talk instead of distracting her.

It’ll be better in the long run. Talking about it is the only way to make it through something terrible.

“Tell me what happened,” I say gently.

She walks me through everything—her relief at Jenna’s reaction, her regret over kissing Alexei in the parking lot, and the terror of suddenly being surrounded. They’d pressed against them so hard, their cameras and microphones dug into her. I see a few lens-shaped bruises on her back and fight the urge to hunt them down and return the favor.

Monsters, all of them.

I admire Alexei’s restraint at just pushing a path through them. I probably would have been throwing punches if I’d been there. Still, I don’t think that’s the only thing on her mind. There’s a lingering tension in her shoulders that I can’t rub away.

“I won’t push you, but I’m getting the feeling there’s something else bothering you. Do you want to talk about it?” I ask.

She tenses under my hands, then sighs. “You are dangerously perceptive, you know that?”

I squeeze her shoulders gently but say nothing.

“There is something else, but I really don’t want to talk about it.” Emily tilts her head up to look at me, and I nearly drown in the honey of her eyes. “I’m done with dwelling on bad shit for the day. Distract me, please?”