If You Give an Artist a Killer Muse: A Dark Grumpy Sunshine Romance
Chapter 32
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Rurik
Something’s wrong. I can feel it.
It started when I woke up early this morning after a weird dream. I can hardly remember it, but I could make out white flowers and splashes of yellow. And then this unfamiliar yet soothing voice was urging me to help. But help what? I don’t know. I blame the alcohol I had last night for the random dream.
I place a hand over my chest, feeling its usual abnormal beating still going. No, my heart seems normal — well, normal for my shitty heart. But I can’t shake that there’s something. I feel like invisible fingers are crawling up my spine to the back of my neck, making me uncomfortable and jumpy.
To top off my uneasiness, Briar hasn’t texted me back today—not even after I sent a good morning text, which is odd for her. She always texts me back immediately after my morning messages. I’ve been setting my alarms to send her texts every morning while I am away because I know how much she loves getting them.
She’s so clingy like that. I kind of love it. No one has ever pursued me as hard as Briar, and no one has ever captured my attention like her.
I wish I were with her—or with her here… I glance at my mum and stepdad, who are both enjoying their lunch outside in the sunny weather. I can’t imagine Briar sitting beside me with them. Maybe with my mum, but my stepdad? It”s not possible.
I take my phone out and scroll through my inbox.
Still no texts. Two hours later, still no texts. An hour later, still nothing. I got up, told them I needed to use the bathroom, and went to my room. Then, I pull my phone out and call Briar.
“Hello?”
My heart skips, and I gasp out loud. Fucking finally, she answers!
“Briar?”
Silence.
“Briar?” I look at my phone to confirm we’re still on the line. “Can you hear me?”
“Hi, Rurik.”
I stiffen. Her voice. It”s… Shit, it reminds me of that day I caught her zoning out in the park. When she was having full-on conversations with me, it was like she wasn”t actually there.
“Baby, you okay?”
“Of course.”
“You sound kinda off. Are you sick?” I look at my watch. I’m sure I can catch an evening flight and be at home with her by midnight.
“I’m fine.”
Silence.
A sense of unease pricks at the back of my neck once more as discomfort washes over me.
“Briar?”
“Yes?”
“Can you open the door for me?”
I’m not at the door. I just need to know what she’ll say. I need to see if she’s even aware of her surroundings. I need her to be like, ‘I thought you’re in Florida?’ and call me out on my bullshit—
“Of course.”
I don’t hear anything in the background.
I swallow hard. “Did you open the door?”
“Yes. Come to bed with me.”
Fuck.
“I have to go, okay? Can I call you back later?” I really don’t want to hang up. But she’s not in the right mental state right now to tell me what’s happening.
“Of course.” She hangs up first.
I stare at my phone. She never hangs up first.
I immediately call the people who may be able to help.
“Rurik?” Natalie answers in surprise. And then her tone starts to grow panicky. “Hey! Are you okay? Where are you? Did something happen?”
What the fuck?
“Natalie, I’m fine,” I assure her. “I’m still in Florida with my mum and her husband.”
She clears her throat. “Your stepdad is there?”
“Yeah,” I say slowly, almost confused. “Why? Never mind, I don’t care. I called for a reason. What happened to Briar?”
Natalie sucks in a sharp breath. “What do you mean?”
“I called her just now, and she sounds… weird.”
I hear rustling in the background and Oscar’s voice next to hers.
“What did he say?” I ask, straining my ears.
“Oscar says she’s fine.”
She’s fine. I hate that fucking word.
“Tell him, Natalie.” I suddenly hear Oscar say.
“Tell me what?”
“Oscar, I don’t know if Briar wants him to worry.”
“Tell him.”
“What the fuck? Worry about what? Tell me what is happening!”
I can hear the sound of the phone passing between hands, followed by Oscar’s sighs.
“Hey, man,” Oscar says. “Listen, I’m going to tell you something, but please don’t worry. Just know that Natalie’s family doctor is taking good care of her.”
My insides turn cold. Don’t worry? Doctor?
An invisible fist wraps around my throat as I fight to say, “What the fuck are you talking about, Oscar?”
“Briar’s been attacked in broad daylight yesterday during her daily jog. She had a mild concussion, but she’s safe and fine —”
“Where is she?”
“Dude, I told you, she’s fine.”
“Oscar. Where. The. Fuck. Is. She?”
“Rurik, calm down—”
“TELL ME WHERE THE FUCK brIAR IS, OSCAR! NOW!”
“Jesus... Okay! She’s staying at the Rogers Medical Center. But Rurik, it’s guarded. She’s safe—”
“Tell the guards I’ll be there tonight. Early morning at the latest.”
“What? Wait, Rurik—”
I hang up, already packing my luggage.
*-*-*-*
I had to pay off some asshole to fly me back to New York because my stepdad made up some excuse that his private jet wasn’t available.
I told him there was an emergency and that I needed to go home. He kept pushing, asking what the emergency was. All I could think about was going home and seeing Briar for myself, so I confessed that I had a girlfriend who was in trouble and needed to take care of her. I didn’t tell him Briar’s name, but he had this weird look — almost slimy and satisfied, which doesn’t make sense to me because he doesn’t know Briar.
Well, Briar without a mask. But I didn’t think anything of it because my mind focused solely on returning to Briar.
And now I’m here. After nearly punching my way through the guards — Drake Rogers and, surprisingly, his wife, whom I had never met, showed up to make sure I was me and not whoever attacked her.
But, I’m here now. And I can’t stop looking at her.
Oscar’s right — Briar’s safe. She’s actually fine.
She”s on her phone, and there seems to be some life in her again. Her brows scrunch together, and her bottom lip pushes out into a small pout as she”s focused on scrolling through her phone. She”s probably wondering why I haven”t replied to the text she finally sent me an hour ago for the first time after her being radio silent.
I ignored it. I just wanted to see her in person. And now she’s here right here in front of me.
I take a step inside the room, and her face shoots up. Her eyes widen when our eyes clash together.
“Rurik! You’re here! What—”
“Shut up.”
“Wha—”
I take her face in my hands and crash our lips together.
Fuck.
I hadn”t realized what I was missing until our lips met again. It feels like the first sip of water after days of deprivation—exhilarating, refreshing, and desperately needed. It”s as if I have been starving, and now, finally, I am consumed with her addicting scent and taste, and I”m damn greedy for it.
“Rurik,” Briar gasps softly as our lips part for air.
“Shut up,” I repeat harshly, ignoring her surprise.
Climbing onto the bed, I wrap my arms around her, mindful of the IV drip. It”s uncomfortable, but I don”t care. All I want is to be near her, to feel her warmth and know she”s safe.
Briar looks up at me, blinking. Her lips curve into a slight grin as she ducks her head, placing it on my chest. The action is making me feel all types of fucked up, but I don’t care. She’s here with me.
After what feels like hours, my body finally relaxes against hers. She takes my hand and kisses the back of it. I kiss the back of her head, just noticing the bandage wrapped around her head.
“What happened, Briar?” I ask, cupping her cheek and forcing her to look at me.
Briar swallows hard and looks away, “I thought Oscar and Natalie already told you? They warned me you were coming, but I didn’t realize how fast you would be here. You didn’t have to ruin your time with your mom, angel. I know she must—”
“Stop changing the fucking subject and tell me what happened.”
Her eyes narrow, and I know I’m being such an asshole.
“Sorry,” I mutter, forcing my anger to simmer down. “I’m sorry. Please, tell me what happened, Briar. I’m going crazy not knowing.”
She just nods and sighs. “I was attacked from behind while I was out for my run.”
“This was after we got off the phone?”
“Yeah.”
“I should have stayed on the phone until you were safely home.”
“What? No, don’t you dare blame yourself.”
I purse my lips, glaring at the wall because I want to say things I know may piss both of us off.
“What are you thinking of?” She had to ask.
“You reprimanded me for not paying attention to my surroundings while I was out, and you couldn’t do the same thing for yourself?” I couldn’t help but snap.
“Are you seriously victim-blaming right now?”
“What? No! I’m just saying you saved me once after you yelled at me for blasting my music and walking alone at night after work. You couldn’t follow your advice?”
“Once? Also, fuck you, Rurik. I didn’t ask to get attacked in broad daylight, in the middle of the park, where there were several witnesses.”
“I’m not saying —”
“You are! You’re blaming me —”
“I’m not—”
“You know what, get the fuck off my bed. You’re too big. Go before I call Mr. Rogers and—”
“Do it. It will be hilarious watching him do nothing. I refuse to leave your side again—”
“You’re pissing me off—”
“You’re pissing me off—”
“Stop fucking interrupting me, you arrogant asshole—”
“You’re the one interrupting me, you little shit—”
“Jesus, if I had known you were going to be—”
“What? Huh? Tell me. Oh, I’m so sorry that I worry about my—”
“Arrogant, rude, major ass—”
“Crazy, psychotic, migraine—”
“Emma, please don’t tell me we were like this when we were young.”
We both whirl around at the new voice.
Drake Rogers and his wife are staring at us with amusement at the door.
Briar’s face brightens, and she tries to sit up, but my arms around her tighten.
I greet them with a charming smile, “Mr. Rogers. Mrs. Rogers.”
Briar tries to elbow me off of her.
Fucking adorable.
“Mrs. Rogers?” Mrs. Rogers says with a wrinkle on her nose. “Just call me Emma, please.”
“Emma,” Briar nods and grins.
Mr. Rogers — Drake — gasps in feigning hurt. “What the fuck? The amount of times I ask you to call me Drake, yet you disobey me? But when my wife bats her eyes, you do as she says?”
“Get over it,” Emma Rogers smirks before turning to us. “We just wanted to check in to ensure everything is okay?”
“Yes,” I say, ignoring Briar’s glares. God, I want them to leave so I can make out with her again.
“We’re okay,” Briar sighs, and I try not to grin as she settles back against me. My dick threatens to stand when her arm accidentally brushes against it, and I feel her freeze against me.
I kiss the back of her ear and whisper, “Behave, my crazy migraine.”
She responds by elbowing my side instead.
Emma and Drake continued staying for a few minutes, letting us know that if we both needed anything, we should let them know. Drake owns the hospital. I will assume he uses the building for other work, but I’m not in the mood to throw accusations around when he saves my girl’s life. After we thanked them, they left.
“Fucking finally,” I mutter, turning Briar’s face to mine and kissing her.
She kisses back, her body sagging against mine. After a few minutes of our lips reacquainting each other again, she pulls away with a slight pout.
“What?” I ask, frowning as I trace her bottom lip with my thumb.
“Do you think it’s my fault I was attacked?” She asks, a hint of hurt in her tone.
Jesus. I am such a massive asshole, aren’t I?
I kiss the tip of her nose. “No, baby. It’s not your fault. I’m sorry I made you think I blame you. It’s the lowlife who decided it was smart to attack an innocent woman who’s at fault. Not yours.”
Briar’s eyes brighten and she kisses her favorite spot on my neck. I sigh, smiling at her and needing to feel her against my skin again. “Do you know who the attacker is?”
She shakes her head. “No. Mr. Rogers is working on finding that out for me.”
I kiss her forehead, “Good. Once he finds out, let me know.”
“Why? You planning on attacking him back for me?” She teases.
“Don’t be silly. You know how I feel about attacking people,” I mutter. “I plan on slitting his wrist clean off, making him choke on his blood while I watch him wilt away into nothing.”
She just grins, planting a kiss on my cheek before resting her head on my chest with a content sigh. I push aside the strange sensation stirring in the pit of my stomach.
The next day, we were back at Briar”s apartment after the doctor checked her and made sure she was okay. After helping her shower off the grime from the hospital, I tucked us in bed, holding her tightly against me.
Ever since we came back, I”ve been glued to her. I try to give her some breathing room, but whenever she winces or makes an uncomfortable sound, I”m right there at lightning speed.
I think Briar secretly likes it when I”m acting like a mother hen, though. She pretends to roll her eyes and call me overbearing, but I see the look of adoration and happiness in those pretty features.
“Can we go to our little slice of paradise tomorrow?” Briar asks, yawning as she tucks her head under my chin.
“We can do whatever you want, baby,” I murmur, kissing her head. “I’ll bring some canvases so I can paint, and you can bring a book to read? We can make a day out of it.”
“Yes, please.” She snuggles up against me.
A few minutes later, I hear tiny snores coming from her, and I close my eyes, drifting to sleep as I listen to her breathe. Excitedness radiates through me about going to our spot together.
*-*-*-*
Just kidding. I don’t think we can make it to our little slice of paradise today.
Instead, my literal broken heart decided I didn’t deserve to be happy and became a little fucking asshole by attacking the shit out of me. I remember waking Briar up in the middle of the night because I couldn’t breathe.
God, I remember the look of pure fear on her face when I tried to tell her I couldn’t breathe and that my heart felt like someone was squeezing it.
Which is saying something because I thought being the Charons’s secret weapon meant she feared nothing?
I was wrong.
So… Now we’re back at the hospital. But this time, for me.
God, I fucking hate it here.
I look at my woman sitting beside me, her hands clutching my hand tightly.
She knows.
After driving me back to Roger’s Medical Center, she found out who my doctor was and called him over. For some reason, when my doctor met Drake, he looked like he was going to shit his pants — The doctor, not Drake. The latter just glared at him silently, which I didn’t understand. They literally just met.
Anyway, I didn’t care enough about the two’s weird greetings.
I only cared what happened after my doctor told Briar everything about my heart issues. I couldn”t answer his questions because I was sort of out of it when I arrived. Briar did it for me. My heart couldn’t take whatever excitement I had experienced the past few days, and it wasn’t keeping up with my body.
I’ll never forget how pale and scared Briar got when he explained my condition.
“What happens if his heart gives out?” Briar had asked him. “What can we do to prevent that from happening? Can he get a new heart if it’s that bad?”
“He’s on the list for when a new heart is available.”
“If he does get a heart transplant, will he live normally?”
“I can’t guarantee anything, ma’am. If he does get one, he’ll just have to take care of this heart like he does with his current one. Possibly with more care.”
“But he will live?”
“He’s young, so if the surgery is successful, I don’t see any complications. Again, I can’t guarantee—”
“Listen, man. I will fucking pay you top shit, cold, hard, clean, crisp dollar bills if you fucking promise me my angel will live forever.”
“I…uh…”
I grabbed her wrist because I didn’t like her shaking hands.
“It’s okay,” I told her. “I’m fine.”
I hated using that word. I’m not fine. We both know it. But she just nodded back and kissed me, letting my doctor finally leave.
That was hours ago. I look at my watch and see it’s already seven a.m. She has stayed awake since we arrived.
“Baby,” I whisper. “Why don’t you go home and rest?” I trail off when I see the look of anger and hurt splashing on her face. “Briar, I don’t mean I don”t want you here. You look exhausted. Please go home and sleep.”
“But I want to stay here with you,” Briar shakes her head, face set with fierce determination. “Don’t fucking force me to leave when you refused to leave my side, Rurik.”
Okay, fair.
“Besides,” She adds. “I bribed your doctor to let you go home early. He said your heart is ‘normal’ again and gave you some new meds. Why didn’t you tell me? I never see you take them.”
“I sometimes forget to pack them,” I mutter, embarrassed.
Her eyes narrow, and a flash of irritation colors her cheeks. “Luckily, he gave me refills to pick up at the pharmacy. From now on, you fucking take them when required, understand?”
“Okay, mother.” I roll my eyes, yelping when she pinches my side. “Ouch! Okay, fuck. I’ll take whatever the doctor orders.”
She snaps, “Rurik, if you die on me, I will bring you back to life so that I can yell the shit out of you. Then, I’ll kill you again for leaving me in the first place.”
“You’re so violent, Briar,” I say, poking her nose. “Crazy and violent, two things that turn me on about you.”
Her face flushes red as her eyes fill with unbridled lust.
And there goes my fucking dick twitching again.
*-*-*-*
“Any news about the attacker?” I ask Briar. It’s been a week since her attack, and I’m surprised we haven’t heard anything from Drake about the culprit.
Briar and I are back in the park, this time with me super close to her and keeping an eye on our surroundings in case another asshole decides to pop out of nowhere.
She’s silent, looking straight ahead.
“Briar? Did you hear me?”
She stops walking with a heavy sigh and turns to me, her face defeated and nervous. “Please don’t ask me, Rurik. You won’t like the answer.”
I stare at her, feeling my hackles rising. What the fuck does that mean? My eyes zoom in on her hands as she wrangles her fingers together, refusing to look at me.
“Briar…” I warn, placing my hand on hers to stop the way she’s digging her nails into her palms. “Stop it, and just tell me.”
She releases a heavy breath and turns to me. Then she just stares, her eyes drilling into mine, unblinking. I furrow my brow, and she raises one in response, her jaw tightening as she tilts her chin defiantly.
And then it punches me in the fucking face. “You think it’s my stepdad.”
Her silence is answer enough.
“That’s impossible,” I say. “He was in Florida with me and mum.”
Briar scoffs. “Oh, right. Like he doesn”t have his lackeys to do his bidding.”
I don’t want to fight with her again. So I just sigh, throwing my hand over her shoulders and pulling her to me. She hesitates for a second before wrapping her arms around me.
I kiss her head, “You have beef with him, and you won’t tell me what’s up. I’ll go ask him myself.”
Her head shoots up to look at me, her eyes widening. “You will?”
“Yes.” I nod. “I think it’s time my family knows about us, don’t you think?”
She immediately grins, squeezing me tighter.
“Yes.” She ducks her head back under my chin and inhales deeply. “Rurik? No matter what happens, I won”t let anything or anyone stand in the way between us.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.”
*-*-*-*
For once, I’m the one seeking my stepdad to hang out. And I think he was really surprised when I called him this morning because he immediately cleared his schedule and agreed to meet me for brunch.
Now, how do I bring up the subject of Briar? I can’t just say, “So, my girl thinks you’re this evil incarnate, but I can’t wrap my head around that. Can you please tell me there’s an evil doppelganger out there?” He would definitely force me to some institution for my head and not just my heart.
“How’s your girlfriend doing?”
I look up from my plate. Oh, okay. That was easy. “She’s doing great.”
“I see.”
“She’s, uh, she’s fantastic, actually,” I continue, my fingers fiddling with my fork. “I’ve been wanting to introduce you to her. Mum’s spoken to her on the phone before, but they haven’t met in person yet.”
“What’s her name?”
“Briar Reyes.”
Silence.
Familiar invisible fingers trail up my spine and poke at the back of my neck again, making me squirm with discomfort.
“I know who she is.”
I freeze. “You… Do?”
“I’ve heard stories.”
“Oh. Well, I don’t know what you may have heard. She sometimes visits the gallery and helps me work on my projects—”
“I know what she does, Rurik. And I’m going to need you to stay away from her.”
I stare at him. What the fuck? “Can I ask why?”
My stepdad just sighs as if I’m a petulant child. He leans against his chair, shaking his head. “Just do as I say, Rurik. She isn’t good for you.”
“I beg to differ, sir,” I’m starting to feel fucking pissed right now. “She’s not—”
“Get rid of her, or I will have to take matters into my own hands.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Seriously, what the hell isn’t anyone telling me?”
He snaps. “I know who your girlfriend works for. I know she’s the one trying to kill me. Why? I don’t know. But, if I see her anywhere near you again, I will end things by myself.”
“Wait… What do you mean you know she’s—”
“I distinctly remember showing you a picture of her, Rurik. It wasn”t so you can have this ridiculous fantasy—”
“It”s not that,” I interrupt impatiently. “She”s not what you say she is. I mean, sure, she”s kind of scary sometimes, but…” I trail off, noticing his face growing even more red from anger.
“Get rid of her, Rurik.” He snaps. “I mean it, or I will take matters into my own hands.”
“Are you threatening us?”
“No, son.” Philip sighs. “They are the threat to us. I’m trying to protect you.”
“Seems like that’s something you two have in common then.”
“Dispose of her, or I”ll send reinforcements to handle her and her friends. What were their names? Oscar? He”s your friend, too, right? He owns that pathetic gallery? And his wife, Natalie?”
“You said you know she’s the one going after you. How?” I stare at him. A chilling thought enters my mind as I ask, “You didn’t… You didn’t have anything to do with her attack last week, right?”
“Don’t ask ridiculous questions,” Philip barks a laugh. “I can’t be in two places at once.”
No, but you have men who can do your dirty work.
I can’t stop staring at him.
All the accusations Briar told me about him must hold some truth to it.
If Briar is right and he deserves all the attacks because of his awful actions, she’s in trouble because he knows her.
He doesn’t answer me, only continues cutting his steak as if he’s imagining it as something — someone — else.
Oh God…She’s probably on his list just as he is on hers.
I can’t have that.
I have to do whatever I can to keep her safe.