Chapter 15
15
APRIL
We spend the night playing board games, and slowly, my mood improves.
Everything is starting to feel like it did before I spent my Heat with them—even Donovan cracks a rare smile every few minutes.
It still feels like I’m on thin ice with him. His words from before echo in my head, and I have more questions for him, but tonight doesn’t feel like the right time to voice them.
I just want to enjoy the pack’s company tonight.
Hunter bought an expansion to the cat game we played the other week, and I shriek in delight when I get the kitten bonus and adopt all of Donovan’s Siamese cats.
The common theme of these games is that Donovan always loses, and a petty part of me rejoices in that.
Maybe that’s why he hates playing them so much.
We’ve all changed out of formal wear and into plain clothes. To see the Alphas in their suits is always a treat, but I feel more comfortable when it’s just us hanging out in sweatpants and hoodies.
Hunter also express delivered a mini chocolate fountain, and he takes every opportunity he can to feed me chocolate coated cookies and strawberries in between turns in the game.
“You don’t have to do that,” I say in between bites, wiping away the chocolate sauce on my lips.
“I don’t have to do a lot of things,” Hunter counters. “But it’s more fun if I do.”
Donovan sits across from me at their table in the game room, his eyes burning as I lick my lips.
He looks at me like he’s a man starved, a hunger in his eyes so intense it makes my core clench.
He says one thing, but then his actions and over the top jealousy prove otherwise.
He’s a walking contradiction.
I don’t understand, but I’m not even in touch with my own emotions half the time, so how can I ask him to do the same?
I happily took on his fake relationship contract, and now I’m frustrated that he doesn’t want more.
How does that make me any better than him?
“Hey.” Hunter shoves another cookie into my mouth, and I realize I’ve frozen with the playing cards still in my hand. “Stop thinking, baby. Just play a card.”
A hand rests on my thigh underneath the table.
Liam.
I sigh in relief and chew the cookie thoughtfully as he rubs tiny circles on my thigh with his thumb. He squeezes the sensitive skin, and my stomach flips.
Donovan watches it all happen, but says nothing.
Talk to me, I want to scream. Tell me what’s inside your head.
He remains silent, of course.
I toss a tuxedo cat card onto the table, and Liam makes an audible “oh.”
And Donovan…Donovan smirks .
I realize my mistake too late.
Donovan takes my stack of kittens back, emptying my entire hand, and winning the game.
“Well, there’s a first time for everything,” Hunter murmurs. “Guess I shouldn’t have told you to stop thinking, baby.”
A small smile forms on Donovan’s mouth, and I commit it to memory.
We play another round, but by the time I’ve yawned three times in a row, Donovan frowns at me.
“You should sleep,” he says, his voice low.
I roll my eyes. “I should do a lot of things,” I murmur. “Sleep is last on my list.”
But he continues to stare at me from across the table, and I want to slap him. “Yes?” I ask, unwilling to tolerate his glare.
“I’ll walk you to your room,” he says.
I tilt my head at him curiously.
It’s never an ask with him, is it?
Liam and Hunter freeze next to me, the room growing silent. A die slips from Liam’s hand, and it clatters obnoxiously against the tabletop, rolling for far too long.
I could argue with Donovan. I could bring up what he said to me earlier in the gazebo, but I don’t want to make things worse for the pack.
It would just start a giant fight between the three of them.
Donovan just continues to glare, his oceanic scent growing richer until I finally give in.
“Alright,” I say as I stand. Donovan follows suit, and I turn to say goodnight to Hunter and Liam.
“Sleep well, baby,” Hunter murmurs.
“Goodnight, beautiful,” Liam calls, but Donovan has already taken my arm and led me out of the game room before I can reply.
Sparks shoot up my arm, electricity from his touch burning through me.
I hate that I feel like this toward him.
It would be so much easier if I could stay mad and hurt, but when we’re alone and I’m breathing in his scent, I find myself to be much more forgiving.
And I shouldn’t. I deserve better than a man that flip-flops with his emotions and wants to only care for me in secret.
I’m ready to tell him that as we head down the hallway to my bedroom. But if he wants to enter my room, I’ll let him.
Stupid girl.
We pause at the entrance to the bedroom, the hallway light illuminating the contours of his sharp jawline. “Donovan?—”
“I’m sorry.” His words are raspy, and his voice is thick with regret. He meets my eyes, the dark circles under them prominent in the harsh shadows of the hallway light.
My inner Omega rejoices at his words, but I stuff her down.
I’m sorry isn’t enough, especially when it looks like he’s swallowing razor blades just to utter the words.
“For what?” I demand. “Which part, exactly?”
“For all of it.”
I shake my head. It’s still not enough. “I don’t want to talk about this?—”
“You said you wanted to try, and I dismissed you,” he breathes. “The other week…you told me you wanted to try, with me. No one’s wanted to try, April. No one has bothered to try. And that…unsettled me.”
I nod. “Well, I meant what I said back then.”
He swallows, and vulnerability shines in his icy eyes. “Do you mean it now?”
His mood swings give me whiplash.
Do I want to try with the man that told me I wasn’t good for him, but then tells me he misspoke and meant to say he’s not good enough for me ?
Donovan has communication issues, to say the least. We both purposely concealed who we were to each other when we first met, and that should have been the first red flag.
Do I want to try with him?
My first answer is yes. My inner Omega would do anything just to be near him. He’s handsome, brilliant, and smells like home —I want everything with him.
But then I think back to the girl that stayed alive in that room, imagining a world where she could bake again with her friends and family.
What would she want? What does she deserve?
I look at Donovan, and I don’t know.
Donovan must see my answer, because he clears his throat and moves a lock of hair away from my face. I close my eyes at his touch, sighing at the contact.
“I’m sorry,” he repeats. “I’m sorry I ever made you question your worth.”
I swallow and tears fill my eyes.
“Sleep well, April,” he murmurs, then heads down the hallway, leaving me for the evening.
I call after him, but he ignores me.
I groan in frustration and enter the bedroom, keeping the door cracked.
Donovan is a headache. But he’s a handsome, delicious smelling headache that tears at my heart and makes my pussy throb.
Damn him.
I flip on the light to the bedroom, take one look at the bed, and gasp.
“What the hell?” I whisper.
I haven’t seen this bedroom in more than two weeks. Last time I was in it, it was a well-kept nest made with thick woven blankets and tons of pillows.
What’s before me is extravagant.
I’ve seen these types of nests in magazines, but I never thought anyone actually had them.
The bed has been replaced with a mattress so wide it can easily fit the four of us, and thick, fluffy comforters are piled on all sides. Body length pillows along with average sized pillows line each side, and extravagant silk blankets are folded on top.
I stop counting at ten blankets.
The nest screams luxury.
I take a step closer and sit on the edge of the bed, groaning in pleasure as the mattress dips with my weight.
I can scent all of them in the nest. Liam, Hunter, but most of all, a thick, rich ocean scent with the slightest hint of salt and citrus.
Donovan’s heady scent is saturated in every pillow and blanket.
He’s behind this.
I flop onto my stomach and bury my face in the fabrics, breathing in his delicious scent.
And as I slowly drift to sleep, bundled in blankets and comforters, I wonder if I’ll ever truly understand him.
I hide in my room for the majority of the next day.
Maybe it’s cowardly, but I don’t know how I can face the three of them together, especially after ending my conversation with Donovan last night.
Now that I know he’s the one behind the nest, I’m even more conflicted.
I think of his words from last night.
“Do you mean it now?”
Of course, I want to try a real relationship with him.
But I couldn’t find it in myself to give him my answer after everything that had happened.
I owed it to myself to make him wait just a little to let him know my response.
But now, I feel like a goddamn coward.
Gone is the girl that screamed at him in the garden.
Now, I’m the April that breaks down at locked bathroom doors and can’t even voice what she wants, all while being wrapped in the best nest I could ever ask for.
I relax, burying myself under a lavender weighted blanket and pressing a fluffy pillow to my face, inhaling pure Donovan.
My womb clenches, and my stomach does delicious flips as I inhale his Alpha scent, my thighs shifting together.
My nipples pebble in my shirt, and I realize my body is more sensitive than it should be.
I quickly do the math in my head, then pause.
Oh, shit.
My Heat is due during Kelly’s wedding.
I run the math again in disbelief.
I curl into a ball and groan.
I won’t cancel on the pack. I can’t . Sure, it might be uncomfortable, but if I can take an emergency dose of extra strength suppressants, I will get through it.
But what are the fucking chances that it happens during their ex’s wedding on a private island?
It would be worse if I told them, because then they would insist that I don’t need to go with them.
I’m not backing out of the contract after everything I’ve been through with them.
I’ll just overdose on suppressants and get through it.
I reluctantly roll out of bed and kick the blankets off my body as I sit up, replaying Donovan’s conversation in my head from last night.
With the impending Heat looming over me, I make a decision.
I’m ready to put all my cards on the table and be honest about what I want.
I want to continue dating them after the wedding.
I want to be their Omega.
And if it takes my Heat happening during their ex’s wedding for that to happen, so be it.
Donovan and I can start again, this time with no secrets.
I’ll tell him how I feel, and how I don’t need him to save me.
I just need him to be him.
I want to hang out in the studio with Liam, Hunter, and Donovan, and just watch them create.
I want to teach them to bake cookies in their kitchen while my friends visit.
I’m ready to tell Donovan that I want a life with the three of them.
The sun is setting by the time I head downstairs, and the warm scent of vanilla and cinnamon assaults my nose.
Hunter and Liam are in the kitchen with flour, eggs, and sugar gathered on the large marble island.
My eyes widen at the sight. “What are you guys doing?”
Hunter has flour in his hair and a white smudge on his nose. “Hey, baby. We were going to surprise you.” He tries to walk over to me and give me a hug, but I yelp and move away from his flour-covered hands. He laughs while Liam scowls at him.
“We were trying to make chocolate chip brownies,” Liam answers, annoyed. “But I forgot Hunter lacks basic math skills.”
A baking sheet sits on top of the stove, and I peek over at it.
“You certainly baked… something ,” I say, eyeing the brown sludge in the tray. “To be fair, it smells good.”
“Yeah, well, it was supposed to appear edible, not just smell edible.” I could swear Liam pouts as I walk up to him and kiss his cheek. He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me into a hug, and I sigh in his embrace as his calming eucalyptus scent washes over me.
“Are you feeling okay?” he whispers in my ear. “You’ve been asleep all day.”
“I am now,” I murmur. “How could I not be, when I have your…what did you call them again?”
Hunter laughs behind me. “Brownies, babe. They actually taste good, believe me.”
I turn to him then, his spicy aroma mixing with Liam’s earthy one. “This was sweet,” I say, grinning. “I appreciate the effort.”
“We made you dinner, too,” Hunter adds. “Actually, the three of us did. It’s in the fridge now, so we can heat it up whenever you’re ready.”
I roll my eyes and laugh. “So domesticated,” I murmur. “You know you don’t have to do this for me, right?”
But there’s a glint of playfulness in Hunter’s eyes. “I’m hard as hell cooking for you,” he says. “Believe me, I’m very aware I don’t have to do it.”
Liam clears his throat, letting out an awkward cough as I bite back a smile. “That’s…strange,” I say.
Hunter shrugs. “I am what I am, baby.”
I giggle, unable to contain my delight.
I feel lighter after I’ve made my decision to speak to Donovan and give him my answer, but so far, it’s only Hunter and Liam downstairs.
“Where’s Donovan?” I frown. “You said he helped you cook earlier, right? Where is he?”
Liam scowls. “I’m not sure,” he murmurs. “And frankly, I don’t care at the moment.”
I raise an eyebrow. “Did something happen?”
Hunter shoots me a look and shrugs. “Probably just Donovan being Donovan,” he says, but Liam shakes his head.
“We had a disagreement,” he says simply. “I think he’s taking the time to cool off.”
Anxiety churns in my gut, but I tell myself I’m not the reason for their argument.
They’re both adults, and not everything is about me.
I’m usually the one reminding Skylar of that every time she thinks someone is in a bad mood. She assumes it’s her fault, and I’ve spent years of my life telling her she’s not responsible for other people’s emotions.
But still, it feels like Liam and Donovan’s disagreement might have something to do with me.
You’re ruining their pack.
I want to have the conversation with Donovan as soon as possible. I want to give him the answer I couldn’t give him last night, but I want to do it in person, not via text or phone.
“Should we wait for him for dinner?” I ask carefully.
Hunter rolls his eyes. “Nah. I’m sure he’ll come out of sulking when he’s ready.”
But I can’t but feel that something is wrong, and putting off telling him will only make things worse.
“No one’s wanted to try, April. No one has bothered to try.”
His desperate words from last night play in my head, and I let out a shaky breath.
“He’s at the office,” Liam says finally, noticing the worry on my face. “You don’t need to wait for him, April.”
I can’t help but sense a double meaning in his words, but I nod and give Liam a soft smile anyway.
Dinner is delicious.
I don’t know how Liam and Hunter mastered the art of cooking until Hunter pipes up in between mouthfuls of food.
“It’s actually Donovan’s mom’s recipe,” he says. “She used to make it for us all the time after school.”
It’s a simple meal, pork meatballs with egg noodles in a creamy mushroom sauce, but it’s just the right amount of savory and buttery.
“She was a great cook,” Liam adds as an afterthought.
I cock my head slightly at his verbiage. “Was?”
Hunter makes a face. “Yeah, she died a while ago. Aggressive cancer. It was awful.”
Liam’s expression matches Hunter’s. “Donovan did everything he could to help,” he murmurs. “He was flying her around the world to meet with the best doctors and try different treatments. Nothing worked.”
“It was fucking horrible,” Hunter adds. “She was always there for us. She was dealt a shitty hand when Donovan was growing up, and the minute he could, he bought her a home and paid off all her debts. But this was the one thing he couldn’t do for her.”
My conversation with Donovan in the gazebo suddenly makes sense.
“I can’t save you, April. I can’t save anyone.”
“That’s horrible,” I whisper.
“He’s always been an asshole,” Hunter says. “But after she died, he just became insufferable.”
I chew my food in silence, processing their words.
“I wish he had told me,” I murmur after a moment.
Hunter snorts. “Yeah, life would be easier that way,” he sighs. “Life would be a lot easier for all of us.”
It doesn’t excuse Donovan’s behavior, but it’s starting to make sense.
I try to put myself in his position.
“My mom is my only parent,” I say slowly. “She’s my entire family besides Skylar. But biologically, she’s all I have.”
What would I do if I had to watch my mother suffer?
What if all the money and resources in the world couldn’t save her, and I had to watch her slowly succumb to a sickness I couldn’t stop?
Liam gives me a sad smile. “Tammy’s great, April. I’m glad you have her.”
I look down at my plate, picking at my food.
My mom is great.
She’s patient, smart, and puts up with my and Skylar’s antics way more than she should.
Her daughter is hours away from her, under a contract drafted by three billionaires.
The fact that she hasn’t broken down the door to the packhouse shows how much restraint and trust in me she has.
My stomach churns as an image of a heartbroken Donovan fills my head. The pain in his icy eyes as he told me he couldn’t save me.
But it’s not his damn job to save me.
Pulling out my phone, I shoot Donovan a text.
I need to talk to you.
“You okay, baby?” Hunter asks.
I place my phone down. “I could use a drink.”
Liam chuckles softly. “Me too.”
We end up in the game room, me sitting in Liam’s lap on the couch with my legs stretched out. Hunter is on the opposite side of the couch, massaging my feet, and I groan in pleasure.
Their scents mingle, earthy and spicy, and soon, my worries dissipate.
The conversation at dinner is forgotten, and all I can focus on is the pleasure from their hands.
I’m overly sensitive from the slightest touch, and the more I shift in Liam’s lap, the harder he grows against me.
“Stop squirming,” he warns me, nipping at my neck. I hum as Hunter digs his fingers into a particularly sensitive spot on the arch of my foot, and purposely move my bottom along Liam’s erection.
“Or what?” I breathe, locking eyes with Hunter’s fiery gaze. His signature smirk is on his lips, and he presses even harder into my foot, making me arch my back in a mixture of pleasure and pain.
To my surprise, Liam places his mouth to my mating gland and sucks, hard.
I see stars. White hot pleasure courses through my body as Liam tongues my mating gland like it’s my clit, flicking it gently in circles while Hunter continues to massage me.
I’m dangerously close to an orgasm already, and barely anything has happened.
“Fuck, those sounds make me hard,” Hunter groans. “I could come just from hearing you, baby.”
Hunter’s fingers massage up my calf while Liam continues to suck and nibble at my sensitive skin. Wetness pools between my legs, slick beginning to stain the crotch of my jeans.
“Ah,” I breathe, reaching behind me to tug at Liam’s dirty blonde hair. He groans at my touch but doesn’t let up on my mating gland.
“Could you come from this?” Liam whispers into my skin. “Just from us touching you like this?”
My breath comes in rapid pants, and I let out a low moan. Liam thrusts his clothed cock against my ass, and I bounce in his lap while Hunter continues to caress my body.
“Please,” Liam’s voice is a choked groan. “Please let me hear you come.”
And I do. I tilt my head back and let out a cry so loud I’m sure all of Stone County hears it. Hunter groans in approval, praising me through my release while Liam groans in my ear.
But it’s not enough.
I want more.
My body is on fire, and I need to make them feel as good as I do.
Angling my body, I turn around in Liam’s lap and kiss him, his tongue plunging into my mouth. He tastes like mint and the slightest hint of spice, and I moan at his taste. I wriggle out of Hunter’s hold, and he lets out a pained groan at the loss of contact.
“What do you want, baby?” he chokes out as Liam runs his hands down my neck. “Tell us.”
My head is foggy with lust, but the image in my mind is clear.
“Stand up,” I say to Liam. “And take out your cock.”
He raises an eyebrow, his green eyes entertained. “Yes, ma’am,” he jokes, and I watch with satisfaction as he moves off the couch and stands, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his jeans. His cock springs free, thick and mouthwatering, and I motion for him to stand behind the armrest.
“What—” he asks, but he has his answer before he can fully ask the question. I angle myself on the couch and take his cock in my mouth, placing my weight on my knees and resting my forearms on the arm of the couch. I force him as deep as I can, letting him hit my gag reflex.
“Holy fuck ,” Liam groans, running a hand through my hair. “Sweetheart, you don’t have to do that?—”
I moan around his cock, cutting off his sentence. I hollow out my cheeks, sucking and slurping on him while Hunter’s hands caress my ass.
“That’s it, baby, keep going,” Hunter praises. “Choke on that dick, fuck .”
With my ass up in the air, Hunter works the zipper of my jeans until my panties are exposed, then pulls them down. Liam begins to fuck my throat, gently at first, but I relax my jaw until he can slam forcefully into it.
I hear a slapping sound behind me and realize Hunter is jerking himself off while watching me choke on Liam’s cock.
“April,” Liam chokes out, and my eyes roll into the back of my head at his scent. “Fuck, I need you to come—I can’t come if you don’t.”
Hunter slaps my ass, hard, and I shriek on Liam’s cock, my throat tightening.
“She can come from sucking cock,” Hunter growls, his hand cupping my asscheek and squeezing. “Right, baby? You can be a good little Omega and squirt all over the couch just from deep throating, can’t you?”
I’m not sure if it’s possible, but I’m so turned on that I wouldn’t be surprised if I could.
Then Hunter reaches underneath me and rubs my clit once.
I shatter.
Liam pulls out of my mouth with a pop , and I let out a strangled cry as I lose my balance. My orgasm washes over me as Hunter roars behind me, his cum spurting all over my exposed ass. Liam holds my head up and angles his cock back into my mouth, groaning as he shoots ropes of his cum down my throat.
Aftershocks crash through me while I swallow Liam’s cum, tasting him and sucking on his still hard cock. Hunter smacks his cock against my ass, groaning.
“I can’t wait until that pretty asshole leaks my cum out of it,” he pants.
I’m pretty sure my face turns scarlet.
Slowly, I roll onto my side, my body a mess, struggling to catch my breath.
It was a release I didn’t know I needed, and my head begins to clear.
Hunter and Liam help clean me up, then I end up cuddled between them, both of them purring on either side of me.
“You’re amazing,” Liam says offhandedly as I start to doze in and out. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“You’d be fine,” I mumble. He strokes my hair while Hunter gently snores against me, leaning his head on my shoulder.
“Maybe,” Liam admits. “But fine isn’t the way I want to live anymore. Now that I’ve met you, there’s no going back, April.”
“Sap,” Hunter mumbles sleepily. I pinch his arm, and he groans in annoyance.
“ Anyway ,” Liam says pointedly. “There’s something I’ve wanted to tell you for a long time. And…I feel like I never find the right time to say it.”
I swallow, unsure where this is going. I think I might know, but I don’t want to be wrong.
“April,” he whispers, and I hold my breath. “I?—"
But the sound of the front door opening interrupts us.
Donovan is home.
Liam falls silent.
Donovan’s ocean scent wafts into my senses, and I jolt up, the mood ruined.
I need to speak with him.
“I’m going to my room,” I stammer. “Please tell Donovan I’d like to talk to him.”
Before they can react, I hurry to my room like a coward.
I wasn’t ready for whatever Liam was about to say, and I’m not sure I’m ready to talk to Donovan about his past.
But it’s now or never.