Chapter 5
CHAPTER 5
Misha
Misha rocked on her heels, wondering when she could buck up the courage to quit playing these games and speak her mind like she did in her head. Being heard wasn’t something she was familiar with. Her parents didn’t fully ignore her like Penny’s parents did when she’d been a child, but they were complacent about a lot of things. Her love life and any of her passions weren’t things they cared about. Showing up for support was one thing, but her diary had been listening to her more than the adults in her life for a large chunk of her childhood.
And now?
Even talking to Felix had its limits. Instead of taking the confrontation as a challenge, she simply ran away from it, and from him. As she wandered through the Dungeon she couldn’t help hating herself a little bit for it. If she weren’t so dodgy, they could be enjoying themselves amongst the crowd, but after speaking in the library yesterday, she wasn’t even sure if she was making things better or worse at this point.
She paused her steps, looking out toward the ornate double doors at the entrance to the Dungeon. The design across the front had taken her a few days to recognize, and the artist within her was a little disappointed that she hadn’t immediately picked up on the Saint Andrew's Cross representation. She was originally distracted by the guard standing watch outside, and over the past few days she realized that they were on rotation constantly. There was never a time when the Dungeon was left unattended, and she liked that about the Ranch. It offered another level of security that she hadn’t seen anywhere else. Maybe if she could let go she could enjoy the full experience.
Her fingers clutched the little bundle in her hands. This was her first time going to the Dungeon with the intent to play. She’d hung out around the lounge area and observed, her hands folded beneath her chin as she mentally took notes and studied how individuals played with each other. Some seemed to prefer privacy, while others were brazen and put on a show. She liked studying the participants, seeing what implements they brought along or took from the armoires scattered throughout the room. There were similar ones throughout the Ranch, but since she had yet to actively participate, she hadn’t taken stock of what was housed inside each one. Each time she approached one alone, she felt wrong and stepped back. When she did open the armoire, she wanted to do so with a partner. Preferably one who would match her submissive side.
In her mind, that space was reserved for Felix. But after baring her soul like an idiot, she wasn’t sure if she could face him again. If he thought she was a fool, it would shatter what was left of her resolve. She feared his rejection would be enough to convince her to leave Rawhide.
She nodded to the guard who gave her a polite smile as she stepped through deeper into the playspace. She’d chosen to use the locker room first to change, slipping out of the leisurewear she’d wandered the grounds in. The outfit of choice tonight was one she felt highlighted her best features.
Problem was, she really wanted the outfit to have been chosen by another. She wanted someone to want to dress her up pretty and fuck her dirty. Maybe a teensy bit of temptation would get things moving along.
Sliding into her outfit, she took a moment to admire it. One thing about Penny, she knew how to talk a girl up. While Misha knew what was fashionable and on-trend, Penny had an eye for what turned heads, and no matter how unsure Misha felt about something, her friend was always willing to give her a pep talk.
Maybe this time she’d listened a bit too well. The glittery bodysuit had snaps for easy access and skintight sleeves that covered her arms and left strategically placed holes to highlight her breasts, waist and hip bones. The cutouts did wonders for her shape, and after staring for too long, she opted to discard the fishnets for her smooth legs. She brought a pair of short combat boots when all of her heels seemed to just not be the right choice for this outfit. It didn’t scream Domme by any means, but it did scream tease.
Doing a few pivots in front of the mirror, she decided it was the right choice after all. She wanted to look good, and hopefully the apple of her eye would show up tonight. With the weather setting in for another snowstorm she couldn’t imagine a better place to spend the evening than in the Dungeon.
Well, perhaps the library. Or even better if they made it back to one of their beds.
As soon as she stepped back into the lounge area, a hearty chuckle made her freeze. “You’re going to make him eat his words tonight, aren’t you?”
She spun around, eyeing the man to her right. There was a pretty brunette holding on to his arm, looking on with interest. It took her several moments to place the face and remember how this man recognized her. “You’re a friend of Felix’s?”
“We go back a ways,” he agreed, nodding to Misha. His eyes were friendly, and instead of creeping on her, he tugged the woman at his side a little bit closer. She offered a beaming smile to match her blush and inclined her head in greeting. “Gabriel, in case Felix failed to mention my name. This is Eris.”
“Misha,” she said, forcing a smile before bowing her head.
Misha had seen several of the submissives do that, and although Master Derek advised that she do what she was comfortable with, she felt inclined to go with what the other participants did.
“You don’t need to bow, little submissive,” Gabriel explained, and she glanced up through her blue and black bangs. “We are just heading down to play. Are you planning to spend some time waiting up here?”
Misha stood straight again, biting her lip as she tried to decide on an answer. “I’m going to wait for someone.”
Gabriel winked before tugging Eris who eagerly followed his step. “Don’t worry, I don’t think you’ll have to wait long.”
Despite herself, Misha glanced around as the two wandered off. She didn’t immediately see Felix and tried to tamp down her disappointment. She’d only been out of the locker rooms for a few minutes and running into his friend was already a stroke of luck. Taking a spot on one of the loveseats, she sat back with one leg crossed over the other and peered around.
Watching was a different type of fun. In her mind, men were always the Dominant party but since coming to the Ranch her eyes had been opened to so many new things. The Dommes were some of her favorites to watch, even if that wasn’t a role she wanted for herself. The way they owned their sexuality and their power resonated with something within her, and she wanted that self-assurance and confidence.
Her eyes swept around the room, lost in the thrill and feel of being part of something euphoric like this. She was entranced enough that she hardly noticed when someone sat down beside her until she did a double take.
Felix . His dark eyes and darker expression soaked right into her, and for a moment she feared he was upset about something. Then he reached out and swept some of her hair off of her shoulder, his strong fingers grazing her skin longer than necessary. Sitting so close, she could see the tattoos peeking from his shirt sleeve, and it just made her mouth water that he was so close to her again. There were beads of sweat along her skin, and she realized somehow she’d gotten worked up and hadn’t even known it until right now.
Swallowing, she met his gaze head on. The anger she thought she’d seen was actually admiration, and heady lust that threatened to drown her in his penetrating gaze. There was no anger there at all, only pure desire that threatened to swallow her whole.
“You look gorgeous tonight,” he said, his voice as thick with need as the heat in his gaze. She swallowed, letting his eyes wander, and silently preened beneath his attention. He finally reached out, sliding his hand into hers to draw circles along her palm. “Are you here to play?”
“Well, I didn’t get all dolled up to look like a decoration,” she joked, wincing when she heard exactly what she just said. There went being calm, collected, and smooth. “I intend on playing tonight.”
Felix’s eyes flashed. “With whom?”
“Well…” she hesitated, and when he raised an eyebrow and fought back a smirk, she realized he likely already knew who she was waiting for. He just wanted her to say so. “I was waiting for you.”
He grinned, grasping her hand more firmly with his. “Do you want to play out here, or do you prefer a room?”
Her eyes flashed, and she glanced back to the central play space again. It was several steps lower to offer some sense of privacy while the main area could still look in and observe. It would be raw, sexy, exhilarating…
And completely out of her comfort zone. She hadn’t ever done more with Felix in public than whisper and kiss. Every time they were together it had been behind closed doors, except maybe some hot and heavy kissing in a bar beforehand. But she nodded anyway, hoping he could deduce an answer from that, and after a beat of silence she felt fingers pressing beneath her chin to lift her gaze once again.
He was close enough to kiss, and her breath caught in her throat. “I need you to say the words, Bambi.”
Her heart slammed in her chest. He’d used the endearment in the past when they’d stolen time away to be together, but never in all the messages they’d exchanged had he called her just that. It was a nickname he only ever used when they were together physically, because she did give him big doe eyes when she wanted him to fuck her deeply and nice and hard like he always did. When he called her that, she forgot about their problems, and it stroked both her ego and her emotional needs to be this close with him.
Swallowing hard, she nodded. “I want to play out here, Sir.”
Felix smiled and nodded, tightening his fingers around hers as he released her chin. Without a word he tugged her from the seat, and she was suddenly glad she’d opted to not drink anything when she’d first come down here. His grip on her hand was certain as he led her to the play space, and some of the worries began to melt away.
This is where they were best. Physical needs were easy between them. All the emotional stuff created problems, and Felix always seemed to know how to shut off her mind for a little bit. He led her down to a vacant loveseat, and when his gaze met hers, she felt the familiar tingle rushing through her body, making her eyes travel over him. The years between them simply fell away when they were together, and all she could focus on were the muscles hiding beneath his shirt, his strong hands, the tattoos that so few people got to see… it made her mouth water. And she wasn’t ashamed of it.
“Sit and wait,” he said, that velvety smooth tone she’d missed washing over her skin. Felix was always in control when they were together, and it allowed all those worries to settle in her brain and become something akin to background noise. When Felix commanded her mind, she didn’t have to think or feel or fret, and submitting that deeply to anyone gave her pause. They’d never discussed an explicitly Dominant-submissive relationship, and it wasn’t until he’d mentioned the role play one afternoon that she’d even recalled it.
As he paced across the room and opened one of the cabinets, Misha felt her mind drifting off to another moment in time. The fond memory captivated her, bringing her back to one of their first encounters together.
Felix’s fingers pressed to her chin, and obediently she opened her mouth into the perfect ‘o’ shape that he loved. An adoring smile graced his lips as he studied her, and Misha rounded her eyes as she stared up at him and kept her face frozen with that look.
“Such a good girl,” he told her, the praise rushing straight to her core. “Are you going to play nice tonight?”
Misha laughed, closing her lips into a smile. “No biting, Sir?”
“Only if you want to be punished, Bambi.”
His footsteps brought her back to the moment, and Misha wasn’t exactly sure what altered her to Felix’s steps among a crowd of people. Maybe it was the return of his familiar presence in a sea of strangers. But he returned with a closed fist and nothing she could see, which made her question what exactly he’d gone to grab.
Shooting her a grin that matched the one from her memory, he twirled a finger. “Stand and spin around.”
She complied, popping her butt out when she bent over the back of the loveseat, facing the top of the wall in this lowered space. If she inclined her head, she could look at people's feet, but she kept her gaze straight ahead instead. Felix knew what she liked. They might not have had a lot of time together over the span of more than a year, but the times they were together had been sexy and magical and some of the best of her life. He’d already learned the map to her body before. Now it was time to see if he remembered all the right paths.
A little gasp slipped from her lips when his palm connected with her thigh, making her body jolt against the sofa. The squeak that left her was barely audible in the room, and she felt his body when he leaned over her. Her breasts pushed at the top of the sofa, making her nipples harden at the contact. “You remember your words, Bambi?”
Misha bit her lip, letting her eyes roll as the nickname washed over her. They’d spent time in the past doing a bit of hypnosis training, something that she’d found online and he’d been very skeptical about. All it really did was help her brain slip into that pleasant subspace, and Misha enjoyed when Felix could use her trigger words to help her fully relax and shed the worries.
She had never asked him or anyone else how conventional that was. The internet was a strange place, and when she’d originally found the idea, he’d been against it because it left questionable consent. But she only wanted it there to help enhance her pleasure and shut off all the minuscule worries in her mind. She still fully knew what her words were and how to get Felix to snap to attention if something was out of line.
“Red for stop. Green for go. Black for full stop, back away from me,” she recited, the words imprinted into her memory.
“Good girl,” he replied, and she leaned back into his body. Misha wanted to soak it all in just then in case this was a short-lived thing. “Now focus for me.”
Straightening her back, she let her shoulders drop as she parted her legs, and one of his palms rubbed at the sensitive, stinging skin from his spanking. Before the burn faded he removed his palm and applied the same pressure to the other thigh, making her gasp again.
The spanking gained in intensity, and every so often he’d bring his palm down on one of her cheeks. It made her body sing with pleasure, and when his palm found its way between her parted legs, he applied the same swift spankings to her lips through the fabric, making her cry out.
It was loud. So loud. His attentions stopped, and she felt him cup her there, massaging over the skin that stung. “Word.”
“Green,” she gasped, no hesitation in her voice. She wanted that sting and more. He knew how to make her beg, and he also had to know she didn’t need him checking in over a slap to her pussy.
But Misha’s eyes glanced around, and she remembered they were in a room full of people. The cry was a little pained, and surely Felix thought someone would assume her cry wasn’t from pleasure. He flexed his hand, shifting his grip back until she felt one finger dragging across her pussy. The snaps keeping her little outfit together felt so inconvenient now, and they were the only things that secured the bodysuit in place. If he popped them open he could have access to her entire body instead of teasing her through the fabric.
He gripped the side of the stretchy material, and she squeaked when it snapped back against her skin. She wanted to tease back, to ask when he would do more to her outside some light spanking, but if she pushed, he’d do what he always did and withdraw. She just wanted to feel him inside her again.
“Spread for me,” he breathed, and she opened her legs wider automatically. She had no idea if he would find out how to undo the bodysuit, but when his fingers passed along the snaps again she could hear his dark chuckle as he traced over them, the thin material providing almost no barrier from his heated touch. “Do you think you deserve me tonight?”
Misha bit her lip, knowing some of that brattiness she was known for would come out when she spoke. He applied another rough slap to her pussy, making her squeal before she responded. This was the kind of game they used to play, and her heart beat a little faster when she acknowledged that. “I’ve deserved you for a long time, Sir. You’re the one who keeps making us wait.”
Felix growled, the primal sound shooting straight to her clit, and he undid the snaps with a flick of his wrist. She’d omitted panties underneath, hating the line it left beneath the tight material in the mirror, and his surprised groan made her decision totally worthwhile.
She rocked back into his hand, his thick cock pressing against her butt from behind. He was wearing some type of thin dress pants, and she could feel the shape of him as though he were already down to his boxers.
Felix shifted behind her, keeping his fingers where they were gently teasing her entrance, and she felt his other hand come around to grip her hair. It was a position she’d experienced so many times before it didn’t surprise her in the least, and she arched her back to give him a pretty picture to admire as she anticipated what came next.
His fingers left her pussy for a moment, her clit throbbing for attention and her body aching for him to slide a digit or two inside of her. It was all very reminiscent of what was familiar between them until…
Misha gasped loudly, bucking back against him with his hand returned to her pussy, moving higher to her clit, and the familiar little zap shot through the bundle of nerves. Her hands tightened on the top of the loveseat until she was sure her nails would snap, and her back arched far enough she could see the top of his head.
“Don’t think I forgot what makes you weak in the knees, Bambi,” Felix reminded her, applying the little zap a second time. E-stim toys were something that Felix had introduced her to and she ran with, loving how the small electric shock made her feel from such a controlled object. Feeling the familiar toy teasing her pussy just made her realize maybe he’d kept some of their favorites after all. Either that, or the Ranch had a very similar style implement, and she wasn’t complaining.
“I’m going to need to see you come for me before I get my cock anywhere near this pussy,” he continued, his breath hot on her ear. “And I want those thighs dripping with your cum.”
Misha whimpered, rocking hard against his hand. He would intermittently press something that made the little handheld machine send a low volt zap through her clit, driving her mad with lust. It was like the times they’d gotten together when he was free, and she moaned as he increased the frequency. Her pussy ached with need, yet Felix never moved his hands close enough to offer her any sort of relief. Getting to come wouldn’t satisfy her needs when she could feel his hard cock still against her ass.
He pressed down on the button, and at the especially long shock, she cried out as the orgasm shot through her, making her body shake against his, and he tapped at something, making the little shocks go off multiple times. It was almost overwhelming, and she bowed herself backward again into him.
She was almost certain there was a hand in her hair, but at one point Felix must’ve let go. She was so distracted with what he was doing to her clit and not doing to her pussy that she’d completely missed when his grip disappeared from her head.
Her breath caught when she felt him shifting, and in the next moment the heated head of his cock was nestled between her legs. She whipped her head around, ignoring how hard her heart beat in her chest as their eyes met.
His dark gaze seemed to practically swallow her, and he leaned forward as his cock lined up with her pussy. “For the record, Misha, I thought about you every day too.”