Chapter 8
I waited anxiouslyfor Paul to show up. Our raid a few nights ago had gone to shit, and ever since then, I had been tense. No, that was a lie. Before the crap hit the fan and our two biggest suspects never showed up, I had been tense.
Paul”s demeanor had completely changed after I took him aside and warned him to calm down at work. One minute he had been his normal, jovial self, and the next his face had fallen and twisted into a professional mask. It was almost alarming how quickly he changed before my eyes.
So what am I doing here now?
I had no idea. Maybe I felt bad about that day. We had barely spoken since then, but it wasn”t as if it was my fault. I had to tell him to calm down or someone was going to figure out that we were fooling around. That could put both of our jobs in jeopardy and I knew neither of us wanted that.
”Yo.”
I turned around, knocking over a glass container of sugar that had been on the counter. The sound of laughter, the smell of coffee, and the warmth of the cafe disappeared as I zoned in on Paul. He had one hand in his pocket, the other clutched around a cup of coffee that he had just purchased. I was already doctoring mine up, but now I”d made a mess.
”Paul,” I said. ”You snuck up on me.”
”Sorry. Bad habits,” he said as he moved forward and cleaned up the spilled sugar. ”I didn”t think you startled so easily.”
”I normally don”t,” I said. ”I guess I was in my own head.”
”Hmm.”
My stomach clenched as I watched him tidy up the area that I had messed up. The usual grin was missing from his lips. It was odd.
I didn”t like it.
”Something the matter?” I asked.
”Nothing,” he said as he tossed away a napkin and took me in. ”Do you want to stay here or go for a walk?”
My stomach twisted. Why did the way he say it feel like we were about to break up? I knew we weren”t together, I was well aware, but I couldn”t help the way my gut dropped and my palms started to sweat. I discreetly wiped them off on my jeans.
”A walk is fine.”
”Let”s go this way. I know a quiet spot.”
I trailed after Paul, my eyes fixed on him as I tried to figure out what was going on. We spilled out onto the street, the noise of cars and talking filtering in again as I followed him. We turned a corner and approached a small park down the road, a patch of green in the otherwise concrete jungle that was New York.
I stopped short. We hadn’t said two words to each other on the walk. After a moment, Paul turned and raised a brow at me.
”What is this? If you didn”t want to see me today, why did you respond to my text?”
Paul turned to fully face me. ”I don”t know. I guess I don”t want to cross any lines.”
That hit me right in the chest. So, he was upset by the fact I told him to knock it off at work. I wasn”t trying to be rude to him, but the truth was that he was playing with fire by flirting so hard in a place where people made it their life”s mission to observe everyone around them. We didn”t need to spell it out in black and white when we were in a room full of agents. It was better to be safe than sorry.
”Paul, I didn”t mean any offense. My career is important to me, it always has been,” I said as I walked over to him and we kept up speed together this time. ”I”ve been working my ass off to get here since I was a teenager. This is all I want to do. It”s all I know. Besides, I have daughters. If I lose my position, they would be in jeopardy, and I can”t have my baby girls out on the streets.”
He gazed at me from the corner of his eye. ”I can understand that.” He was quiet for a minute until we walked into the park. ”You”ve wanted to be an agent since you were a teenager? Why?”
I shrugged. ”My father was an FBI man, and I respected the hell out of him. I knew by the time I was twelve that”s what I wanted to do too. He was diagnosed with Lupus when I was in high school, and I threw my all into showing him that I would make him proud. That”s why I never had time for...”
”Fooling around?” Paul asked.
”Yeah,” I answered as I blew out a breath. ”Everyone else was living their life, but I was trying to make sure he was fulfilled before it was his time. And I did it. I had graduated, joined the FBI, married, and had two adorable daughters for five years before he passed on. I”m glad I was able to give him a life as a grandfather and father-in-law, at least for a little while.”
”Sorry,” Paul said quietly. ”That sounds rough.”
”It was.”
”When did you figure out you were gay?”
I glanced over at him. ”Not until about four years ago. Dawn put her hands on my face, looked me in the eye, and said, ‘Honey, I think you”re gay—go experiment!’ I didn”t know what to do about that at first or how I felt about it. I”d pretty much figured out that women were not for me, but I was trying hard to still be a good husband and father. It wasn”t her fault I didn”t know who I was before we got married. But she insisted. Even set me up on a date.”
Paul whistled. ”What a woman.”
I laughed. ”Yeah, she was. Actually, she would have loved you.”
He blinked at me. “Really? Why?”
”You”re a lot like her, in your own way. Bold, unpredictable, honest. You say whatever comes to mind, while I analyze each word before I speak. You certainly have traits that I do not possess.”
Paul sat on a park bench and when he turned to me, his grin was back. I let out a sigh of relief. We sat in silence for a while, sipping our coffees and enjoying the brisk air. Fall was rapidly becoming winter and I already missed the warmth and comfort of sitting in the sun, by myself, taking a moment to breathe.
”Sorry I was a jerk,” Paul said. ”I didn”t mean to be so standoffish today.”
”It”s okay,” I said. ”Besides, that bust during the raid the other day put me in the worst mood. All that work and what did it get me?” I laughed dryly as I leaned back and stared at the evening sky. Oranges and reds splashed against the clouds. After a long day of work, I needed a moment like this. ”Sometimes this job is so fucking stressful, I hate it. So much preparation, time lost, lonely nights and we might save one soul. It feels like a mockery at times.”
A hand squeezed my thigh, and I looked at Paul. ”Don”t feel like that. I”ve watched you bring in serial killers, rapists, mobsters, and bikers. You’ve saved more than a few. What you do is important.”
”Is it?”
Paul nodded. ”Of course. Don”t worry. Things will change. Besides, you have an informant in this case. I”m sure she”ll come through for you.”
”She always does,” I said, sighing as I relaxed more. ”Thanks, Paul. Talking to you makes me feel more sane. Sometimes.”
”Other times?”
”You make me feel like I”m nuts.”
”Awww, you love me, boss. Don”t be like that.”
”Don”t call me boss in public,” I growled.
”Ooh, what was that voice? Fuck. You can growl like that? Do it in the bedroom, right in my ear.”
There was the Paul I knew and wanted to strangle. Despite feigning annoyance, I couldn”t wipe the smile off my face as he started to pester me. Every word was a taunt and a flirt. There was seriously something wrong with the man.
We resumed walking again, chatting about life, our job, everything. When had he made my walls lower? They were still there, but it was like he was capable of peeking over them. I kept stopping to stare at Paul. Was this a date? No, it couldn”t be, but I felt like if I had ever gone on one I enjoyed, this is what I would have felt. Light, airy, relaxed. I laughed more with Paul than I did with anyone else I had ever met. But this wasn”t a date. We both knew and understood that. Exploring any of the mixed-up feelings in my chest would only result in confusion and disaster.
It”s better to keep this casual.
As we strolled, I stopped and looked around. Out of nowhere, the hairs on my arms had started standing on end. For the second time that I”d been with Paul, it felt as if someone was watching us.
”You feel that too?” he asked.
”Yeah.” I reached into my jacket and laid a hand on my pistol. ”Why is it that everytime I”m with you, someone”s staring a hole through my skin?”
”I have no idea, but I don”t love the feeling either.”
The sound of running feet made me turn around swiftly. I tracked movement through the trees and took off for them, Paul on my heels. As I rounded a corner, I nearly fell on my face as I ran into two brown-skinned, brown-eyed, babygirls.
My daughters.
”Hey, Dad.” Navy grinned.
”Hi,” Nyra added, a bit shyer about it than her sister.
I took my hand off of my pistol. ”Girls, what are you doing here?”
”We saw you going out and you looked real nice again,” Navy said. ”Too nice. We wanted to see where you were going.”
Nyra nodded. ”Are you on a date, Daddy?”
Oh my God. My twins were every bit as perceptive as their mother and truth be told, me. They would make excellent agents someday.
”Who”s this?” Navy asked. ”Your boyfriend?”
”He”s a friend from work,” I said quickly to stop their nonsense right away. ”Paul, this is Navy and Nyra.” They both waved. ”This is Paul Gallo.”
I turned to see if he was as utterly horrified as I was, but his face was blank. I turned back to my kids. Never in a million years did I think our second date would be crashed by my kids, but apparently, they had other plans. Ones to drive me crazy.
”You two are so very grounded when we get home.”
”Awww, that”s not fair,” Navy whined.
”Fair? You”re wandering around a park in New York by yourselves. What if you were kidnapped? Or murdered? Or both!”
”Daddy, but we”re not,” Nyra added. ”I was very smart. We kept close and if anything happened, we both have these.”
To my astonishment, they both pulled matching bottles of pepper spray out of their pockets. I reached down and snatched them away, stuffing them into my pockets.
”What is wrong with you two? Where did you get those!”
”We found them online,” Nyra said.
”It”s really easy to buy stuff online,” Navy added.
”Oh my God.”
A snicker grabbed my attention. While I was stunned, I turned to a laughing Paul. He covered his mouth with the back of his hand, but there were wrinkles around his eyes and his neck was red from him trying to contain himself. I blinked at him.
”You”re not helping.”
”Sorry, sorry,” he said as he removed his hand and laughed again. ”Hi, girls.”
He held out his hand to them. Each of them exchanged a look, silent words exchanged behind those big eyes before they each turned back and shook it. I had no idea how they communicated that way, but it freaked me out every time.
”Hi, you”re cute,” Navy blurted.
I stared at her in shock. Why was it that she was the one that always said the first thing on her mind? Nyra was the quiet one, but even she seemed to be enamored by Paul.
”Why, thank you, little lady,” he said as he smiled at her. ”I love your dress. Blue is my favorite color.”
”Mine too, and Nyra”s. Isn”t that right, Nyra.”
”Light blue,” Nyra supplied.
”Well, I like dark blue, but they”re close,” Navy said as she tilted her head. ”Your eyes are pretty.”
Paul whistled. ”You are a little flatterer, if I have ever met one. Can we buy them ice cream?” he asked.
I stammered over my words as the girls cheered. ”Absolutely not! I will not reward bad behavior. You two are going to come home right now. Where is Shelly?”
”Who”s Shelly?” Paul asked.
”Our nanny,” Nyra muttered. ”She”s the worst.”
”She is not,” I said. ”You two don”t like that she has rules.”
”Daddy, please, let”s stay out,” Navy pleaded as she grabbed Paul”s hand. ”You want ice cream too, right?”
”I do.”
”Paul!”
”What! I do,” he muttered.
I groaned. He was just as bad as the children. ”I”m sorry about this interruption to our...” I tried to come up with a word. ”Meeting.”
”Ah, yes. Our meeting,” he said. ”It was very important.”
The smirk on his face grew, and I wanted to bite him. What was he trying to say? I shook my head, pushing that thought aside for now.
”I really am sorry. I need to get them home. I don”t know why Shelly hasn”t called me yet.”
”We hid her phone,” Navy supplied.
I slapped a hand against my forehead. ”When I say grounded, I mean grounded. Do you two hear me?”
They both whined and moaned about why that wasn”t fair, but we were beyond that. This wasn”t the first time they”d followed me, but at least back then, it was as I left the house and they were caught immediately. This time, they had gotten further.
They were getting smarter.
”Awww, don”t scold them,” Paul said. ”Come on, I”ll take all of you home. We”re not that far anyway.”
”Can I hold your hand?” Navy asked.
”Of course,” he said before he held out his other hand. ”Do you want to hold my hand too, Nyra?”
As she jogged to him, I took his cup and tossed it away along with mine. I paused.
”You can tell them apart?”
”Definitely.” He laughed. ”It”s easy. Now, what kind of music do you two like? If it”s stupid, I”m not playing it.”
I stared at them as I trailed behind. Paul chatted with them as easily as if he”d known the girls his whole life. And they talked back just as eagerly. My kids were not outgoing when they met new people. They had been through too much to get attached this fast. So why wouldn”t they let go of Paul?
And how could he tell them apart? Even I had difficulty sometimes and they pulled the wool over my eyes. Not as often as when they were younger, but still.
What was it about Paul that had the entire Washington family hypnotized?