36. Brother and Best Friend
On my walk back from my class, I run into David. Well, actually, he spots me and jogs up to me. He has never done that to me before, so my first thought is that he was possessed by some ghost child who thinks I’m their lost mother or something. He slows to a stop in front of me.
“What the hell?” he asks, out of breath. “No one tells me anything. Tamara filled me in about the other day. Is everything good? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” One thing I don’t need is to retell the grueling details of that night. “How much exactly did she relay to you?”
“She told me what was necessary,” he says, squinting his eyes from the sun. “I wish I could have been there. Is Brandy okay?” Ah, there we are. That’s who you really care about.
“She’s good now. She is taking a day off from classes to regroup. She’s also afraid she’ll see Stef around.”
“No, that screw up went home for the week. Somehow, his parents heard about things he’s been doing and pulled him out. I hope they tear him a new one.”
There’s an uncomfortable silence, and I can practically hear what’s going through my brother’s mind. Sure he can hide his emotions when it comes to our parents’ divorce but not his feelings for my best friend.
“You can talk to her. If you like her you should tell her. All I would say is give it at least a few days until some of her stress about Stef’s party fades.”
David nods and rakes a hand through his dark hair. “Yeah. Maybe I will.”
“She deserves more than a maybe.”
I can sense the anxiety that fills him because it’s turning his cheeks pink. I have never seen him this messed up about a girl before. “I will,” he replies, then excuses himself to go to class. He’s always so great at conversation.
It doesn’t matter. All I want to do right now is go to my room and settle down with a good book. When I get there, I am surprised to see Brandy sitting on her bed with a small pile of papers. The instant I shut the door, she runs to hug me.
“Lainey, oh my God. I am so sorry,” she says in my ear.
Why the heck is she sorry? Wasn’t it me who kept denying her invitations to go to parties, which ended up with her all drunk and drugged by a couple of turd frat boys?
She goes on. “I’ve had trouble sleeping just thinking of all the things I made you do.”
We break apart. “Don’t apologize to me. I mean, sure the list has caused a few disasters, but I’m the one that failed you. I should have been there. You went to Stef’s alone.”
She covers her face with both her hands and groans loudly. “Don’t remind me. I’m embarrassed and disgusted.” She drops her hands and swallows hard. “You’re a good friend for helping me.”
“Brazely, Tamara, and Cameron were there too.” I couldn’t tell you why I feel the need to downplay my involvement, but I do.
“But you brought Tamara and Cameron. I just appreciate that you were there. I’m glad that Brazely was the one to see me at my absolute worst and not you.”
Isn’t that the point of a best friend? To be there for them at their worst?
Sensing my confusion, Brandy speaks again. “I appreciate what she did, but I don’t care what she thinks. We’ll probably never interact again. If it were you I’d—I’d fear that you’d grow tired of my chaos and leave.”
“Leave.” I taste the word. Process it. A coolness passes through my chest. I resent the word, her context around it. “I wouldn’t do that.” There’s a slight edge to my voice.
She grabs hold of my arms. “No, no, no. It’s just, if I keep causing you this trouble. If I keep putting us in these bad situations, I’m afraid I’ll be scaring you off. It’s happened before.”
I’m about to deny her statement until the last sentence rings in my ear. “What do you mean?”
She turns on her heels and leans against her bed. She presses a hand to her forehead as if to block any unwanted emotional reaction to her thoughts. “You notice how I never mention my parents?” I nod. “It’s because I don’t have any. My stupid biologicals put me up for adoption as a baby, and my adopted parents moved to butt-fuck nowhere in Idaho, without me.”
That’s heavier than I expected. “What’s in Idaho?”
“You tell me. I would never leave California to go to a place called Idaho. Whatever. They sucked. They didn’t care what I did, so I said ‘screw it’ and found parties to go to after school to pass the time. Never checked in to ask if I was okay or anything. It wasn’t until a few weeks before they moved that they had a problem with my behavior. They said they couldn’t raise another child with a person like me around.”
“They got pregnant then left you?” I guess.
Brandy shrugs. “Yeah, so they moved to my adopted father’s parents’ place and dropped me off with my aunt. Unlike her sister, she’s really nice. And she’s been with me ever since sophomore year of high school. I try not to be too crazy with her, though. I don’t want her to leave.”
“She won’t. If she is as you say, she won’t. Neither will I. Don’t you think if I wanted to get away I would have?”
She lifts her shoulder up. “I mean, we’re roommates. You’re kind of stuck with me.”
I grin. “I can’t just walk out on someone who’s done so much for me. Look at me.” I hold out my arms briefly as if to show myself off. “When you met me, I was quiet, awkward, and scared. I’d never been to a party in my life. Never took the opportunity to discover who I am, what I liked, or even who I liked. Not that everything has been smooth sailing, but I can honestly say that if some girl who was similar to me were my roommate, I would still be that lonely person. You pushed me, and I needed someone like you to do that. Plus, you’re my best friend, and I can’t get by without one.”
She looks as if she might cry, and she dips her head to look at the floor. “You’re my best friend too. Probably my only.”
I scoff and dismiss that immediately. “Tamara is your friend. So is Mikey and Cameron and David, and hell maybe Brazely will have a change of heart and be your friend.”
Brandy lifts her head and wrinkles her nose. We both laugh. “David’s afraid of me I’m pretty sure,” she says.
I cross my arms over my chest. “He should be,” I laugh, “but my sources say he’s rather fond of you.”
She nearly hops off the bed. “What sources?”
I shrug and take my merry time before responding. “David.”