Not Safe For Work: A Steamy Fake Dating Romance

Chapter 23

Saturday night turnsinto Sunday and we both blow off our planned activities. I feel a little guilty remembering how excited Liv was for a spa day, but I figure I’m helping her release tension too.

It’s a weird feeling, to finally get what you’ve wanted for so long. You worry that your expectations are too high, or you’ve built something up in your head that doesn’t fit the reality. Being with Liv feels like the opposite, like I never had a fucking clue how amazing this girl is.

We almost miss the shuttle back to Puerto Vallarta, but luckily Daanesh has them hold it for us. And when we get on, we’re met with a bunch of hushed whispers.

Liv gives me a questioning look when we sit, but I don’t have a clue what to say. Then Andie is there shoving Liv onto my lap so she can sit with us.

“What’s going on?” Liv asks her friend.

Andie looks sheepish, like she’s not sure she wants to answer the question, even though she came over here on her own.

“I heard a few of the guys talking.”

“And?” I ask.

“So, I don’t know if he was drunk or just being petty but Ian was talking about you a lot last night. After you two left the club. Which, by the way…not a very subtle exit.”

I grin, remembering how badly I wanted to get Liv alone that we actually started running.

“What was he saying?” Liv asks.

“Just the usual bullshit. How you’re pretending to be into Gavin to try and make Ian jealous. That he’s above the childish gimmicks, blah blah.”

What a dick. He just doesn’t want to admit he wants her back.

“Sounds like Ian,” Liv replies coolly. “But why all the whispers?”

“I wasn’t around for this part,” Andie continues. “But I guess a bunch of people were partying on the beach doing acid,”—no surprise there—“and someone pointed out your villa. I think they were just mentioning the upgrade, but Ian like ran over and tried to get in.”

“What the hell?” Liv whisper-yells.

“He didn’t. Get in, I mean. Obviously, you know that. I heard Vaughn caught up with him in time to stop him kicking the door, but…”

“Andie. What are they telling people?”

He went to spy on us? What the fuck was he hoping to see? I have a lot of thoughts about this but let the girls talk it out.

“Honestly, it’s not that bad. I mean, everyone knows you two are together so why wouldn’t you be together, right?”

“Andie,” Liv seethes.

“Okay, okay. This morning, they were telling a few people about it and how they heard you and Ian said something like, “All he did was bring her to Mexico. You should hear what she did for a trip to Singapore.”

“I’m gonna fucking kill him.” I mean to say it in my head but when both girls turn to me, I realize I let the words slip. I guess I can’t kill him. But the second I’m done with this job I’ll be clocking him in the face so hard he can never smirk at anyone again.

The shuttle hits a long series of potholes and Andie goes back to her original seat so Liv can get off my lap.

“You okay?” I ask. It’s a stupid question because of course she’s not okay. I run my hands through her hair to try and help her relax.

“I’m fine. He may have everyone else fooled, but I know the truth. That trip to Singapore sucked.” She chuckles to herself. “I didn’t even want to go. It was summer and like a million degrees with a thousand percent humidity. But he begged me to go because the clients were big wine collectors. It was basically a work trip that I had to take PTO for.” She scoffs, and I’m surprised she’s not more anxious over the rumors.

“He took me all over the world,” she muses, and then she turns to me until her face is tucked into the crook of my neck, her nose brushing against my skin. “But this was the best trip I’ve ever been on, Scottie.”

I grin against her. And then I lean down to whisper, “Do you think he just got pissed because he heard how enthusiastic you were?”

She giggles and smacks me lightly against the chest. I can feel my eyes get heavy as the medicine starts to kick in and I wrap my arm around her. She stays tucked into my side for the whole ride.

I might have been passedout the entire flight home, but I know I enjoyed it. Because when I wake up, Liv’s hand is still in mine.

I try to brush off the drowsiness when we land and start by turning on my phone. I have three new messages from Gabby.

Gabby:

What the hell is this?

WTF Gav

How long have you been lying to me?

They’re punctuated by a photo she took of my mail. Apparently, I was denied for that new line of credit I applied for last month. Fuck.

Gabby was never supposed to know about this.

“What’s wrong?” Liv asks.

“Nothing, just trying to wake up.”

We’re both standing in that awkward scrunched position waiting to deplane. She grabs on to my shoulders and tries to shake me, shimmying her hips at the same time.

“Damn, you’re stiff as a board.”

“Yeah.” What’s that saying? Dead as a doornail, stiff as a board? Doesn’t sound right but that’s how I feel right now.

When we got denied any form of financial aid for Stanford, I decided not to tell Gabby. I knew she wouldn’t want to put more pressure on me, and she’d already offered to take out a loan or just go somewhere cheaper, but that’s not what I wanted for her. I was happy to bear the financial burden so she could enjoy school without worrying about money every day.

Gabby’s had a tough life, and she deserves everything. I’m the only parent she’s had since she was ten years old. There was no way in hell I would take Stanford away from her, not after all the work she put in to get there.

But without any aid, and with almost half my salary still going toward undergrad student loans, my debt started to spiral. I thought I had it under control and then our rent went up, and then it went up again.

I feel like I’m going to be sick.

“Come on sleepyhead,” Liv chirps, taking my hand as we walk off the plane.

I pull my hand away when I feel my phone vibrate with another message.

Gabby:

When will you be home? We need to talk about this

Me:

Just landed. I’ll see you soon

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Liv asks once we get in the Uber. I know I’m being a dick and have barely said a word since we landed, but all I can think about is how this conversation is going to go with Gabby.

I can’t let her give up school.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I’m just really tired still.” I rest my head against the backseat window and close my eyes. It’s not a lie. I am tired. Exhausted, really. Just not the way she’s thinking.

She lays her hand over mine and for a split second I forget about my sister and debt and everything in the world that sucks right now. All I see behind my eyelids is the amazing weekend I spent with the girl of my dreams.

I should be happy right now, but I can’t enjoy this feeling anymore until I talk to Gabby. Until I’m sure she’s not going to do something drastic to her future.

The car pulls to a stop, and I open my eyes.

“Do you wanna stay here? I have a very comfy bed you could be laying on in less than ninety seconds.” She taps her fingers across the back of my hand.

“I can’t. I gotta get home. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I lean forward and ask the driver if we can make another stop.

“How could you?”Gabby greets me at the door.

I take a deep breath to steady myself and march past her so I can put my stuff down. “I want to talk about this. I really do. Can you let me shower off the drugs first?” I can barely keep my eyes open.

She huffs, which doesn’t surprise me, but I need a few minutes of solitude to figure this out. I shower quickly, and when I step out of the bathroom, Gabby has a suitcase by the front door.

“What’s going on?”

“I’m staying at Kadesha’s. She’s coming to get me in a few.”

“Okay, but what’s with the jumbo-size suitcase? Don’t you have stuff there already?” I ask.

“I’m not just staying tonight, Gav. I don’t want to be anywhere near you. Casi que ni te puedo ver la cara.”

“I thought you wanted to talk,” I argue. Because that’s what her last text said. “Can we please discuss this? Just let me explain what’s going on.”

She walks over to the couch and sits. “We can talk, but I know what’s going on. After I saw the mail, I decided to do a little digging. How are you paying for my school, Gav?”

From the tone of her voice, it’s obvious she knows the answer.

“Gabby,” I start, sitting down next to her. “I have the payments under control. There’s nothing you need to worry about.”

“You think this is about the money?” she bellows. “We’ve had nothing, and we survived. Hell, we thrived,” she laughs. “You and I can get through anything together. But not if I can’t trust you.”

Her voice breaks on the last word and tears start to pool in her eyes. It breaks my fucking heart.

“Gav, you never lie to me. We never lie to each other. Never about the big stuff. Never about the stuff that matters. I could have taken out a loan myself. I could have chosen a different school. I could have done a million things if you’d just talked to me instead of coddling me like you always have.”

We both turn at the sound of someone knocking on the door, Kadesha I assume.

“Gabby, please don’t leave like this.”

“I know you’re worried I’m suddenly going to drop out of school, and I’m not. So you can relax. I’ll figure out something else. I just need some space right now.”

When she opens the door, Kadesha offers a sad smile my way. I think she mouths something like “it’ll be okay,” just before they both leave and the door closes again.

I’m putting Churro in his sling when my phone buzzes. I say a quick prayer it’s Gabby wanting to talk now that she’s cooled down.

Olivia Diamond:

I swear my bed feels less comfortable now. I miss Mexico *crying face emoji*

Sure you don’t wanna hang out?

No, I’m not sure at all. I would love nothing more than to share a bed with Liv again tonight. But the only thing that matters right now is Gabby, and I don’t think I’m ready to dump all my family drama on Liv just yet.

It’s tempting.

Part of me wants to share my predicament. Maybe she could help me figure out how to talk to Gabby, how to apologize, how to make things right. But I also like the fact that Liv doesn’t know anything about my sad story yet. I doubt she’d think of me the same way after hearing about the year Gabby and I were almost homeless.

Me:

Sorry I can’t. See you at work, beautiful

The truth is that as much as I want Liv, Gabby is the most important person in my life. I have to fix this with her before I can even try being with Olivia.

I getinto the office at seven on Monday morning. Gabby has class Mondays until noon and only works at Sizzl Tuesdays and Thursdays, so my plan is to get all my work done by lunchtime and head over to Kadesha’s place.

This is already the longest Gabby and I have ever fought for, and I refuse to let it go on any further.

With my bike, I barely hit any traffic on the Bay Bridge and make it to her place outside Berkeley in record time.

“Had a feeling you’d show up today,” Kadesha says when she opens the door. She’s smiling so I take it as a good sign.

“Is she back from class yet?” I ask.

“Says she’s staying late tonight. A study group or something.” I appreciate that she actually looks disappointed for me. “Come on in. Let’s chat.”

Kadesha’s apartment is full of color, just like her. It’s always been easy to see why Gabby loves her so much. She has this vibrant, yet somehow calming energy.

“I fucked up,” I admit, falling onto the sofa.

“Oh, I know.”

“Wanna take pity on your future brother-in-law and help me?” Her eyes flash. “Come on, there’s no way you two don’t end up together. Plus, I already consider you a sister. You’re stuck with me now.”

She sits down next to me and lays her head on my shoulder. “You’re stuck with me too. I’d miss Churro too much.”

We both laugh, because we know it’s true.

“Gabby loves you. She’s hurt because she loves you. Just give her some time, she’ll come around.”

“I just don’t want her to do anything drastic.”

“She won’t,” Kadesha says. “She’s not a kid anymore.”

“I know that.”

“Do you?” She looks at me pointedly. “Have you thought about the fact that she’s almost twenty-five years old and might not need you to take care of her anymore? Have you considered that she’s upset because she doesn’t think you trusted her?”

“What? Of course I trust her. That’s ridiculous.”

“Then why wouldn’t you tell her about paying for school? Why keep it all a secret?”

“Because I didn’t want to give her a reason to not take this opportunity. I didn’t want her to feel like a burden.”

“And by not telling her, that’s exactly how she feels, Gav.”

“Shit.” There’s nothing else for me to say because Kadesha’s right. I let my head fall back against the couch. “I really am an asshole.”

“You’re not an asshole.”

I scoff.

“Can I ask you something?” she says.

“Of course.”

“Do you think of Gabby as your sister or your kid?”

“What? What kind of question is that? Of course she’s my sister.”

“I know. But you’ve also been like a dad to her for a long time. When we first met, she told me you raised her.”

“Well, someone had to. Gabby was only four when mom died. Our dad was pretty useless after that, but he left for good when she was ten. Was I not supposed to take care of us?”

“Please don’t get defensive.” Kadesha reaches for my hands between us. “I’m not sure if I’ve ever actually told you how amazing of a brother you are. You’re a superhero.” My throat feels tight, like there’s something lodged in there. Maybe it’s guilt, or just exhaustion. “Gabby loves you for stepping into that role when she needed you, but I think she was hoping that you’d see her as more of an equal now.”

That guts me. Because we are equals. Gabby’s smarter than I’ll ever be. Which is why I’ve been so adamant about her following her dreams. I hate that there’s any scenario where she doesn’t see that.

“I have to run,” Kadesha interrupts my thoughts. “I’ll talk to her, okay? Just don’t stop reaching out. She’s upset right now, but she would never want you out of her life. I think it would kill her if she actually thought you wouldn’t be there for her.”

“Okay. I will.”

I send the first message as soon as I get home.

Me:

Let me know when you’re free to talk. I’ll meet you wherever you want

Another day passes with no response. How long is Gabby planning to freeze me out? I work from home on Tuesday just hoping Gabby might show up to the apartment.

Olivia Diamond:

Where have you been? My desk feels lonely

Me:

Sorry, beautiful. It’s a crazy week

Do you mind asking Eddie to join your meeting tomorrow? I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it

Olivia Diamond:

Oh sure. Is everything ok?

Fuck. I know I need to talk to Liv, explain what’s going on. I’m just not ready. I reply with a thumbs up and click over to my thread with Gabby to try again. I refuse to let her ignore me for another twenty-four hours.

Me:

I need you to know how bad I feel about this. I was an idiot, and I should have been honest with you from the start. I just wanted to take care of you Gabs

Please call me back

Can we meet tomorrow? Your Wednesday class ends at 1:30 right? I’ll take the afternoon off and meet you at that coffee place you love

Please say yes

I’m lying in bed on Tuesday night when my phone rings, making me jolt.

“Hello?”

“Hey, brother.”