Chapter 22
Sobs rocked my body so hard I thought it would splinter into a thousand pieces. Mason held me tight, and I could feel the tension, the worry that sat in his frame. I didn’t think the agony that was wrenching my heart, severing it until there was nothing left, would ever fade. The truth of Greyson’s life and the lies on which our love had sat so precariously gnawed away at the fragments that were holding me together.
Mason rubbed my back, his hand coming up to run over my hair as he kissed my head. As much of an ass as he could be, he had always been my rock and, in that moment, he was the only thing keeping me together.
“Ri…” I buried my face further into his chest, not wanting to talk. The ache was too raw, and I wasn’t sure if it would ever heal. I felt like Greyson had ripped out my heart and ravaged it after I’d handed it to him, trusting that he’d protect it, that he loved me just as much as I loved him. The truth was something I should have seen. The clues had been there, in plain sight. The sneaking into my apartment, the stalking, the key he had…all signs I chose not to see as anything more than an obsession that was driven by the attraction and love he had for me. But it hadn’t been. It had been driven by revenge against Mason and a need to use me. To devastate me and lure my brother to his death.
He was no different from Clint Randall. That pain had been nothing but a dull ache compared to this. What Greyson had done had left me wounded to the core, my soul damaged, my heart mangled.
Another sob tore its way through my body before it broke free, loud and ugly.
“Shit, Mace. Is she okay?” I heard Tyson ask from the front of the car.
“I don’t know,” Mason answered, and I could hear the pain in his voice. I had hurt him, run from him and his protection, and now he was rescuing me again. Left picking up the pieces from my mistakes. Only this time, I didn’t think he could put them back together.
“Ri, please tell me you didn’t fall in love with Greyson Tides,” he said, trying to lift my face.
I couldn’t answer. Couldn’t admit that I had and that I’d handed him my heart, not knowing the disastrous effect he would have on it. Not expecting the consequences. Even in the short time he’d held it.
“Dammit, Riley. Tides is my enemy, and you walked right into his trap.” Another rupture splintered my heart, sending more tears soaking Mason’s shirt. “Why would you go to Bridgeville? Of all the places to run. Fuck, I should turn around and kill him.”
“Want me to, Mace?” Tyson asked. But I gripped Mason’s shirt, picking my head up and meeting his green eyes. The worry that sat in them, mixed with the hurt that remained from the damage I’d done when I left him, only added to my agony.
“No,” I choked out between the tears.
Mason brought his thumb up to brush them away. “Why not? He hurt you, Ri. He…” His eyes darkened, his jaw tightening below the stubble that sat upon it. “He fucking touched you. Just like that asshole Randall. He used you and you…dammit, Ri. Why did you run? Why couldn’t you have just stayed with me? I could have protected you.”
I didn’t need his anger or his lectures and I tried to turn away from him, but he grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at him.
“Let up on her, Mace,” Tyson said. “She’s not in the condition for you to guilt her. Let’s just get her home.”
My love for Tyson increased with his support. He’d always been like a second brother to me, but it was usually Mason who kept him in check.
Mason’s features softened, his eyes looking for something in mine, answers I couldn’t give him. Explanations and apologies I owed him but couldn’t provide because Greyson had left me too damaged to even try.
“Did you fall in love with him, Ri?” he asked again.
More tears fell, his words like a knife shredding what remained of the strands that were holding my heart together. I nodded, my chest so tight with the sob I was restraining that it was agony.
“Fuck,” he said.
“I thought…” I started, my cry coming out so raw it burned my throat.
Mason pulled me back into his chest, his arms so tight around me that it was like he never wanted to let me go. I held onto his shirt, my tears a waterfall that wouldn’t stop. My external injuries were minor this time compared to when Clint had hurt me, but my inner wounds were ones I doubted would ever heal. They riddled my soul and my heart so badly that there was no repairing them.
Mason didn’t say any more, and I let him be my strength, knowing I had none left. What strength I’d had was on the ground of that parking lot with the body of Clint Randall and the shards of my heart.
The snow fellin large flakes, floating like tiny ghosts in the hazy sky beyond my window. Christmas had come and gone, the usual joy of the season buried below my pain and tears. Mason tried convincing me to forget Greyson, but it was too hard. He was in my mind, in my heart, in my soul, no matter that he’d hurt me. It would take years to erase his touch from my body.
Mason checked on me often, but I ignored him, staring out my window each time and rarely leaving the guest room he’d settled me in. I barely touched the food he brought me, barely slept, my dreams haunted by Clint and that night. Haunted by the truth of who Greyson really was, the truth of what he’d done and how he’d used me just like Clint had. Each time I thought about it, the pain grew because as much as I’d thought I loved Clint, it was nothing to what I felt for Greyson. That had been infatuation, lust, but this…this was love—the soul shattering, heart wrenching, never completely healing kind.
“Ri?” Mason’s voice came around my door as I heard him open it. I didn’t know how long I’d been there. The days seemed to blur. I vaguely remembered hearing Mason whisper happy New Year through the door to me one night, but I may have imagined it.
I heard him enter my room, expecting he’d drop a tray of food off and make small talk I wouldn’t take part in. “Greyson is here.”
Hearing Greyson’s name brought the pain to the surface. I didn’t know how to react to Mason’s words. He hated Greyson, so it made little sense that he’d let Greyson anywhere near me.
“Ri, it’s been a month. Talk to him.”
I turned my eyes to him. It was the first time I’d looked at him since the night he’d held me in the back of his car as my tears had fallen. My bruises had healed since then. The small scar on my forehead was the only reminder of that night besides the constant ache in my chest.
“Why would you want me to talk to him?” My voice sounded raw, and I didn’t think I’d spoken since that night, listening as Mason told me about Greyson and their rivalry. Listening as the nurses patched me up and wiped away the blood like I wanted them to wipe away the pain.
“Because I love you more than my pride. I don’t know what to do to help you, Ri. There isn’t much I can’t fix, and you won’t let me fix you. This isn’t anything like what happened with Clint. You got over that, even if you continued to give me the silent treatment. But this…. I’ve never seen you like this. And as much as I hate Tides, I think the asshole is as hurt as you are.”
I scrunched my brows, wondering how that could be. “He used me, Mason.”
“He’s not Clint Randall, Riley. If he were using you, he would have killed you the night he took Clint out. At least hear him out. Or at least tell him to fuck off and get angry at him. I hate seeing you like this. It’s like you”re broken.”
Because I was. Broken was exactly how I felt. Shattered like a piece of glass under the weight of a heavy load, fractured into tiny fragments. I rose, pulling my sweater around me, and walked past Mason, not saying anything further. Maybe I needed to face Greyson, if only to get past the tears and the raw pain that wouldn’t heal.
I saw him standing at the gates, waiting for me, the snow dropping on his black coat and in his auburn hair. I pulled my boots on and walked out, the cold seeping below my wool cardigan. Feeling something other than sorrow was nice, and I embraced it.
Greyson looked up as the gates opened, and I stood just beyond them, not getting close. His brow furrowed, his eyes taking me in with sadness. I was sure I looked a mess. I didn’t know if I’d showered or even combed my hair in days. The sleepless nights had surely left dark circles under my eyes, and I’d lost weight from eating so little.
“What is it, Greyson?” My voice was hollow, and I didn’t recognize it.
“Riley, I’m sorry. I needed to tell you that. To explain everything like I planned to that night.”
“Were you going to explain it? Or were you planning to keep me in your web of lies?”
“They weren’t lies. None of them were.”
“You didn’t spy on me? You didn’t have cameras watching me? You didn’t plan to use me as revenge against my brother?”
He flinched at each word, and I noted how the powerful man I knew wasn’t there. Greyson had come to me with vulnerability, and I didn’t know what to make of it.
“I’m guilty of all of it. I lured you into my firm and away from the smaller firm. I set you up with your apartment. I wanted to get back at Mason, and yes, I planned to use you just like Randall did.”
I couldn’t stop the sob his words caused because hearing him say them aloud hurt worse than hearing them in my head.
“But that changed. The moment I saw you on the street that day. And every moment after. I didn’t lie about how I feel about you, Riley. I love you, and no matter what happens, that won’t ever change.”
The tears burned, but I bit my lip, not wanting him to see them, not wanting him to see that his words were weaving their way into my soul.
“Please, Riley. I can’t take it back, but I would give it all up for you.”
“Give it all up? Your money? Your business? Your life? I doubt that Greyson.” I rubbed my arms as the cold began to burn my limbs.
“I would. All of it.”
“And who would you be without it? Who, Greyson? Because it’s part of you. It’s not something you can give up so easily because who would that make you?”
He didn’t respond, his face falling. I could see the defeat in his shoulders.
“I can’t compete with your world, Greyson. It’s not someplace I can live. Go back to Bridgeville.”
I turned from him, the action opening the wounds further and hurting so much that I had to hold my arms for fear I would double over in pain. I didn’t look back, and as I closed the door to the house, I heard him drive away.