12. Arianna
TWELVE
ARIANNA
M y nose burned as I wiped it for the 200th time in the last hour, trying to make as little noise as possible while Giulia was asleep in my arms. Thankfully she was feeling better, and her temperature had come down, but as soon as she’d started running around again, I got sick. It was like my body had fought the flu until she’d recovered to allow me to take care of her, and then it had come at me full force.
I placed the tissue on the nightstand next to dozens of others, hoping to rest during the day since nights were so rough. My mother was at her flower shop, so it was quiet in the house.
A yawn overtook me, and I covered my mouth before making myself more comfortable next to Giulia. I looked down at her small lashes resting on her cheeks, and my chest constricted.
What was I going to do? I loved my job, and I loved to travel, but I was also missing important moments in her life.
Resenting her doesn’t make you a bad mother. Realizing that what you were doing was wrong while you were still suffering makes you a great mother.
Xavier’s words rang in my mind. There was wisdom to his words, but the call I’d gotten last week had made me rethink my entire career …
I sighed, holding her tighter in my arms.
Just as I was about to fall asleep, my phone vibrated next to me. It was a good thing Giulia slept so deeply, or it would have woken her up.
A frown furrowed my brow. It was my mamma, and she rarely called from work since she only went there three days a week for a few hours.
I slowly got out of bed, placing the blanket over Giulia’s tiny body before I walked out of the room and picked up the call.
“Is everything okay?” I asked with a cough.
“Yeah, yeah,” she replied. “A young man just walked into the flower shop, he says he wants to see you.”
My eyes nearly bulged out of my head as my mind flew directly to Xavier. No, he couldn’t be here. I told him whatever we’d had was over, so he had no reason to come all the way here.
I massaged my forehead.
“What? Who?” I asked, as my heart thumped in my chest. My knees weakened before I heard her answer, and it wasn’t because I was sick.
“What’s your name, son?” I heard my mother ask. “Xavier. Do you know him? He’s got a big basket in his hands.” My mother whispered the last sentence like it was fun gossip.
I closed my eyes, an involuntary smile forming on my lips. What the hell was he thinking coming here? Was it because I’d mentioned I was sick in my last message? But he’d never replied. While I had been bothered by that, I was somehow grateful he hadn’t texted back, because that meant he’d understood.
“Arianna? Are you there?”
“Yes.” I bit my bottom lip.
What was I going to do now? Giulia was asleep, and my mother was at work. I couldn’t leave, but I also couldn’t tell him to leave. He’s in a foreign country, and he came here for me .
Butterflies came to life in my stomach at the thought.
“Do I tell him to leave?” my mother asked when I didn’t say anything.
“No!” I found myself saying a bit too loud, a cough sneaking its way up my throat.
“Then?”
I sighed. “Tell him to come here.”
Xavier, what am I going to do with you?