10. Mako
Chapter ten
Mako
Maybe all there is is me, lost in you, forever- Mathew Mako Fate
We’ve barely seen her. In the three days in White Hall City, Ryn has managed to be anywhere but with us. The infuriating frustration of it is driving me insane. I want to hunt her down and make those eyes go wide and hear that stutter that I love so much.
I glance around the room and adjust the thick leather cuffs. My hair’s done, my makeup is done. I’m just not feeling it. This entire night is pissing me off. I tap my foot and watch people rush back and forth. Envy’s hair is done up in a messy bun. Tyr has black eyeliner around his eyes. My shirt is stylishly ripped, as is everyone else’s.
We’re ready to go on stage.
I fold my arms over my chest, lift my chin, and glare.
“Find Auryn Raines.”
“But-” The assistant tries to argue.
I raise my voice so everyone can hear me. “I’m not going out there until I’ve spoken to Auryn Raines.”
The room freezes, turning deadly and silent. I catch a dark look from Tyr and return it five fold. He wanted this. He started it.
The hair people, the makeup people, the guys dealing with our clothes, the people in charge of this venue, and the assistants scatter. Everybody races to find the missing beta because there is one thing they all know about me, I will burn everything to the ground if I promise I will.
Tony glares at me. “Was that necessary? ”
“Yes,” I growl.
Tyr pushes up out of his chair and glowers in my direction. “What the fuck?”
I ignore him and start pacing.
Envy and Digs ignore me, but ten minutes later, after Tyr has thoroughly got on my last nerve, Ryn walks in. Her eyes are lined in black, her lips are crimson. I swear to fuck her jeans are painted on, and she’s wearing a t-shirt that is tight and small enough that it shows off just a hint of her mid-rift.
My mouth goes dry, and my cock jumps. I don’t want to perform. Hmm, maybe I can take her somewhere and fuck her brains out. I shoot a furious look at my pack, who ignores me, before turning back to her with a smile. I reach out and brush her hair behind her ear.
“You summoned me?” she says, backing up, her eyes fairly spitting fire at me.
I advance on her suddenly and pull her into my arms. She’s stiff for a long moment and then relaxes.
Tony slams the door shut, stopping any of our staff from gawking at us. I’m grateful, but I’m too busy focusing on her. The confidence is gone, and now she just looks confused.
“Three days you’ve been here but not,” I mutter. “I missed you.”
She groans and tries to pull away, but I slam my lips on hers before either of us can think. There’s a moment of shock, but then it all fades away because I’m kissing her. Finally, Our first kiss. It’s everything I dreamed it would be. She wraps her arms around me, leaning up, moaning into my mouth. I pull her closer, deepening the kiss. She’s all soft curves and this faint hint of something yummy.
She tears herself free from me, putting space between us. She glances wildly around the room, but I ignore the silent outrage from my pack, I ignore everything but the way her eyes sparkle, that lovely shade of red in her cheeks, the way her fingers play with her t-shirt hem.
She is affected. She wants me.
Smug satisfaction has me wanting to pin her to the wall and finish this.
“All right. I’m good now,” I tease.
“That’s all you wanted?” Ryn’s voice reaches a pitch that hurts my ears.
“No, I also wanted to know you were safe, well, and happy.”
Her eyes widen, and I think I see something haunted on her face, hidden in her gaze, but then she flutters those long, dark lashes, and it’s gone.
“I want you watching from the side of the stage,” I demand.
“No-I have things- ”
“You have things to do, marketing things, that you’ll be able to see from the stage,” I insist.
Her eyes narrow. “Has anyone told you lately that you’re a pushy pain in the ass alpha?”
“Not today.”
“Let me be the first.”
“We got to go!” Envy says and stalks past us. “Come or don’t come, but he’s not going to shut up.” To me, Envy levels an absolute livid glare.
I just shrug and grin. What are they going to do? It’s done now.
Ryn stands there, stiff and angry. She finally sighs, and I know I’ve won. I take her hand and drag her behind me as we’re led to the stage.
“Sound checks are done. Hair and makeup are done. Everything is checked off, we’re ready to go!” Someone says beside us, and I watch all the sound crew move around like a small army, turning this place into our show.
There are so many people backstage.
I pull her to right where I want her, right where I can see her. “Stay here.”
She rolls her eyes but folds her arms over her chest and nods.
I finally allow the guy who’s trying to lead me where I need to go to do his job. The drums are waiting for me. I pick up the sticks and twirl them around before I shove them in my pocket and pick up the other set. Smooth, clean, and mine. I know them well.
I crack my neck and sit down.
In front of me, Tyr adjusts his microphone, while Envy and Digs pick up their instruments.
I love this moment, the anticipation, the adrenaline pumping, fans screaming with excitement. I can hear everyone beyond the curtains, the roar of thousands of people. The smell of the stage, the feel of my sticks between my fingers as I whirl them around.
And then the timers on, and we’re ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five. I focus on breathing deeply, and then I look at her, four, three, two. I tear my gaze away as the curtain rises.
Envy’s guitar rips through the screams of fans.
When he stops, Tyr starts talking. And then we’re off, playing those familiar songs. But at this moment, this is what it’s all about. When a crowd of thousands sings your songs back at you, it’s a moment where you are full of joy. They humble me and lift me up.
I want to give them more.
The songs change, and we continue through the sets, and all the time, I keep looking at her. Wanting to share this with her. When we play the songs that she helped us write, I see her take a step towards the stage unconsciously.
Tyr glances at her and then steps towards the stage’s edge. Singing harder than I’ve heard him sing, and she steps back. Whatever wonder she was feeling has left her .
No, that’s not right. She’s supposed to be happy.
I want to stop and go to her, but we’re only halfway. I keep drumming, but the night has lost its appeal.
What stole Ryn’s heart?
The night drags on, and by the time we finish the encore, I’m frothing at the bit to get offstage and go and speak to Ryn.
It finally ends, and I jog across the stage to her. She looks up at me and smiles.
“You were brilliant.” Why does she sound like she’s going to cry?
“Auryn,” I say quietly. I want to ask, but there are too many people around. Why is she so damn sad?
She steps back, putting a professional space between us that tears at everything inside me.
A growl escapes, but she ignores me.
“You need to get ready for the meet and greets,” Tony says. “Signings. All that. Come on, we've got drinks set up for you and new clothes.”
Ryn keeps her eyes on what’s going on around her and doesn’t even look up when Envy, Tyr, and Digs pass us.
“Auryn,” I growl.
She finally looks at me. “Go. You have a job to do. I’ll talk to you on the plane tomorrow.”
This is not acceptable and everything inside me hates it and wants to rebel, but there are so many people watching us. It will get out, it will get to her father. We’re already in trouble with the label.
“Fine. We’ll talk on the plane,” I reluctantly allow.
With another long, lingering look, I finally turn away from her, fighting all my instincts until I end up where they want me. I sign until my hand feels like it’s going to drop off. I smile at the screaming women. Young girls stutter and flutter. I get propositioned, and I really come to the conclusion that I hate this.
Envy is sitting at the back. He never signs anything, and the fans are never allowed to touch him, not that they don’t try, but Envy doesn’t like it. So we protect him.
Eventually, it ends, and we’re driven back to the hotel. The door is barely closed before Digs rounds on me, glaring daggers.
“What was that?”
“What?” I say, pretending to be obtuse.
“You demanding Ryn come and stand there for the entire concert? What was that, Mako? And the kiss? WHAT THE FUCK?”
I shrug. “I needed to know she was safe. ”
Digs growls and slams the fridge closed. I pace to the window and stare down at the slow-moving traffic.
“She was safe, of course, she was safe.”
I shrug. “I needed to know it.”
Digs tilts his head back and roars his frustration. Everyone ignores him.
Tyr scrubs his hands through his hair and advances on me, gripping the back of my belt loop and leaning up against me. The heat of him, the presence of him, always turns me on.
I turn my head slightly, watching him nuzzle my shoulder.
“Tyr?”
He makes a sound and then bites down hard. I groan and stand perfectly still while he worries the spot.
Tyr always gets like this after a show. It’s the ultimate for him. His excitement leaves him in this horny, blissed out state where he just needs to fuck it out of his system.
Digs watches with heavily-lidded eyes, but Envy is already stripping off.
“What did she say?” Tyr asks so quietly I almost don’t hear it.
“She didn’t say much of anything, just that she would see us on the plane.”
Tyr slips in front of me, working his way between me and the window. He grips my hand and places it on his neck.
“I made her sad.”
And, oh, the regret and devastation in his eyes until he hides it. Tyr has always loved and respected Ryn, the musician. He would never want to hurt the creative side of her. The woman is a totally different story, the woman hurt him.
I clear my throat and squeeze my fingers, guiding him back towards the bedroom. He lifts his chin, exposing that long neck, but then Envy wraps himself around him from behind. He’s as naked as the day he was born, and that hits Tyr like a tonne of bricks, stealing all of his attention.
I grind my cock into Tyr, and then let go, spinning as Digs crashes into me, our lips colliding. His aggression is something only I can handle tonight.
He pulls off my top and runs his hands up my naked chest.
“I’m so mad at you,” Digs growls.
I bite his bottom lip and growl back, “I don’t care.”
I’m slammed up against a wall, while he undoes my pants and works his hand down until he can grip my shaft.
I moan, the huge heat of his heavy, calloused hand is a heaven that I know I’d kill to keep.
“Digs,” I warn as he just holds me .
He laughs and then strokes me up and down four times before he stops again, his thumb strokes up to my slit. I watch in furious arousal as he lifts this thumb to his mouth and sucks my arousal off his thumb.
“Oh, fuck, that’s hot!” Tyr moans. “Do it again, Digs.”
Envy is on his knees, taking Tyr deep into his throat. Swallowing him with practiced ease.
“That’s hotter,” I argue.
Tyr lets out a groaning laugh.
And this is what we all sat down and decided we couldn’t afford to lose. This pack works, just like this. We know each other; we grew up with each other. I love every single inch of each of these guys. Hell, I know how they got their scars, and I was there for every tattoo or piercing. I understand what it means when Tyr’s eyes flash or when Dig’s fingers start twitching. I understand all of Envy’s silences.
Nothing is allowed to come between that. We have perfection, and our agreement was never to gamble on it.
Not even a beautiful beta with a gift for putting my heart into words and the kiss that has me wanting more.
I push her from my mind, focusing only on Digs as he turns me around, his hands expertly finding all my sensitive spots and setting that blaze higher.
As he pushes into me, his hand gripping my cock, pumping me. Sending us both towards that inevitable explosion of pleasure, I have a moment of regret. Just one flicker, one blip in the perfect world we’ve created.
I glance in the window and see her sitting on the couch watching in the reflection. She looks so sad and alone, but she smiles that brave, wondrous smile that I secretly love. I find my rhythm, staring at her the whole time, but it’s okay, it’s fine, because it’s all in my head. She’s not here, she never is.
I have the perfect pack.
I don’t deserve more.