Our Deceptive Heat (When it Raines Omegaverse #3)

11. Ryn

Chapter eleven

Ryn

Stars burn brightly, never as bright as you - Ryn Raines

I’m starting to hate planes. There is nowhere to escape them in these small, metal boxes. It’s claustrophobic. I’ve effectively avoided them for four shows now, almost two weeks of incredibly skilled disappearing acts.

I have been resilient, practical, sneaky, and I haven’t let them affect me, corner me, or trap me.

I sneak into the darkest corners and watch them play, unable to take my eyes off them. The stage lights are arrows pointing to what I want, painfully painting a picture while the rest of the world falls away.

I long for the stage almost as much as I long for them. But seeing them on the stage is the cruelest torture. They rise so far above me, phoenixes bursting into flames, reborn in the symphonies of our songs.

I fall in love a little bit more with each night, with each note. And in the darkness, I watch with a thousand other people, just another person in the dark, unseen and forgotten.

A useless beta.

I’ll never be good enough to walk in their light.

Which is okay. In the dark, while I watch them play my songs, I can be okay with hearing music I created on their lips. So I hide, and I keep hiding. Working until my eyes ache, forgetting about food and drink .

I’ve become friends with Immanuel, their driver, who has a dry wit and sarcasm that has me laughing until I cry. Cadee who does their makeup and never stops talking. Quint who adores hair and styling it. He misses his partner something fierce. Harris cooks all their food and has a passion only for creating visual, aromatic, and artistic experiences with fresh ingredients, but he’s been teaching me to cook in his spare time. While Nial and José head the security and have taken pains to help me hide from the band. I’ve already agreed to attend José’s bonding ceremony.

Even Tony helps me stay out of their way.

In the meantime, I turn their image edgier; I turn it darker. I remake them, slowly changing websites, merchandise, labels, logos. The interviews I get them are carefully orchestrated, and I direct the questions to be darker and on subjects that I know that will surprise Tyr into answering honestly.

And it works.

Fate’s Choice is entering a new era. Even their stylist is on board, excitedly getting their clothing to be more edgy and sexy, appealing to women and men alike.

I’m on a mission, and I’m winning. But every moment along this road is agony.

Until we get on the planes, that is so much worse. I get to listen to Tyr’s snide comments said under his breath. Mako studies me with a far too knowing and guilty eye. Envy ignores me like I don’t exist, and Digs glowers at me every chance he gets.

My heart beats faster, and I wonder at what point it will suddenly explode and claim my pitiful life. My headache returns. My hands get clammy, and my stomach flutters, and this damn ache that seizes my chest has me locked up, wishing I could be anywhere else.

Sometimes I wonder if this yearning will kill me.

And every single song I pitch at them gets rejected because it’s not right. Tyr knows they are perfectly good songs. He’s just doing this to punish me, and I hate to say it, but it’s working.

I’m starting to lose my cool. The constant headache and battle with the band is destroying me. I take my spot beside Tony, ignoring him as he reclines his seat and promptly goes to sleep.

It’s easy for him. He’s not surrounded by the glaring eyes of the band. Fuck, I can’t resent Tony. He’s done too much to help me.

I open my laptop and stare down at my to-do list. It’s an endless collation of jobs, and all the while, lyrics scream themselves into my head with even more fervor than usual.

I’m frantically scribbling the words down when I finally register the shadow staring down over my shoulder. I go to close the notepad, but Digs takes it out of my hand, frowning as he mouths the words.

“Tyr, read this. ”

“It’s not what he wants. It’s a love song, not a friendship ender,” I protest, trying to get the notepad back.

Tyr ignores me, catches the notepad when Digs tosses it at him and starts reading.

Mako leans over and reads the words of my heart as well.

I close my eyes. I don’t want to talk about that song. They can’t have it. It’s private and personal. My face flames. If a hole opened and spat me out into the atmosphere, I’d be relieved right now.

“Who is it about?” Tyr demands, his gold eyes blazing. The scent of oak gets stronger, and he shifts so that he’s facing me with clenched hands. “Who did you write this about?”

I panic. I can’t tell him the truth. There’s no way. I shiver and rub at the soft material of my jacket. The touch comforts me.

I force myself to stare at my hands. “No one.”

I breathe in. I breathe out.

My eyes give me away. I glance up at Envy, then across to the others. No one is looking at me, and I finally turn away in relief.

“That one is not yours,” I snap, finding myself again. “You can’t have it.”

Tyr hands the book to Envy with a smirk in my direction. I want to slap him. Envy hesitates. I know he really wants to read it, yet he closes it and hands it back.

“She said it’s not ours. Leave her alone. We’re not bullying her into a song she doesn’t want to give us.”

The cold rebuff does the trick, and Tyr and Digs sit down and go back to whatever they were doing.

I hold the book to my chest and stare blindly at the computer. I can’t work, so I start shutting programs down and sit back, feeling more ashamed that I ever have.

They return to ignoring me. It hurts, but it’s better than having their eyes on me and their sharp words cutting at me. It’s better than questions about who I’m pining for.

I glance at my laptop and see another email from my father. I almost ignore it, but terrible things happen and then multiply when you ignore an email from my father.

Opening that email only brings prompt and cruel regret. I tremble, but even clenching my hand into fists doesn’t stop it. I open my mouth several times until I finally find my voice.

“It would seem that my father has decided to appoint you a songwriter to help you with your block.”

The band comes alive, turning towards me with several variations of shock and rage.

“He can’t do that!” Tyr hisses .

I shrug. “He just did.” I hesitate as I read more, refusing to give the band anymore of my attention. It would seem I’m to go and meet with the alphas that are potentially going to be my future pack, too.

My vision blurs. I shift my weight and blink several times, trying to get my brain back.

I’m so cold.

I blindly send back a polite response and acknowledge the demand for me to meet the pack for dinner at the hotel tonight.

It’s during tonight’s show. That’s good, I guess. It will give me a good reason to not watch them. That’s a silver lining, right?

I can just do this and leave. It will be fine. Still, I can’t seem to find a way to calm the bubbling and roiling need to scream.

“Fish, are you all right?”

I blink and find Mako crouched beside me. I’ve got my fingers wrapped around my jacket, twisting it in a stranglehold. My breaths are coming out in pants. He glances at my screen, and I quickly hide it. I have no idea how much he read.

“I’m fine.”

I frown down at him. Those dark eyes seem to reach in and see the fear. He opens his mouth, but Digs growls.

“Mako, take your seat. We’re about to land.”

He unfolds his tall body, gives me another long, penetrating glare, and heads back to his seat.

I quickly put my things away and swallow tightly. The dinner is tonight. I can’t go tonight, I can’t meet these alphas. It’s too soon. I had more time!

I inhale and close my eyes as we land. It feels like it takes forever.

The whole time, I pray for the plane to crash.

My dress is not conservative at all. It’s black and hugs my figure. It’s far more daring than I’ve ever worn. I wish to every single word I’ve ever written that I’d packed just one conservative dress or that the shops were open when we landed.

I look amazing.

I hate it, just looking in the mirror was nauseating.

The walk down to the foyer takes forever, and then I’m suddenly there, and inside, I’m screaming. I scan the hotel lobby, searching for help. I even think I spot Mako, but that’s impossible. They should be singing their asses off on stage right now .

Standing inside the restaurant is an alpha, and he is impossible to miss. Except he’s not at all what I expect. He’s…old.

The alpha spots me, and he frowns as he looks me up and down and flattens his lip in disapproval. It’s the first sign that something is really wrong.

Red flags start waving in a hurricane wind.

“Miss Raines?”

I smile and hold out a hand. “Nice to meet you, Alpha Ellin.”

“Ellis,” he snaps. His eyes rove over my figure, and his lips tighten further. He is severe, his expression, his dark eyes, and his steel grey hair. He looks like he’s my father’s age.

I am afraid of this alpha. The aura he’s projecting is one of cruelty, and I don’t want to be near him. One thing I’ve gotten good at over the years is trusting my judge of character.

I force a smile and turn to the other two alphas who have approached and patiently waited their turn. I do not even let a hint of the panic I’m feeling show as I hide my shock at the visage of the other two.

“Bently and Yardly,” Bently says. He’s got a pot belly and so much hair product in his hair that it looks wet. He’s also older than my father, with straggly whiskers and a rasping cough.

Bile races up my throat. Dad is giving me to these old men? He can’t do this, oh, god. I need to run; I need to get away. Calm, you have time. You just need to survive right now.

Yardly leers at me, and I think if we weren’t in a restaurant, his face would drop right into my cleavage. He doesn’t even say anything, and I’m fairly certain he’s drunk, judging by the smell that’s wafting off him. He’s got a wide chest that tapers into obscenely thin hips and a large hooked nose. His cheeks have burst red capillaries, and the red skin shines with oil. He’s terrifying, especially the way he’s leering at me.

He bobs his head at my cleavage, and I want to die.

I smile politely and hope to everything that my mask stays in place. I’m going to need it to survive this dinner.

“This way, then.” Ellis leads the way, and the three sit down at an intimate booth.

I stand there, waiting for instruction like the well-trained bitch my dad created. I want to fidget but know better.

They look me over. This time, their inspection is more intense. My skin crawls, and I break out into goosebumps.

“Turn,” Yardly barks out. The alpha command shocks me, but I’m helpless to resist. It is such an incredible sign of disrespect to use your bark on someone in this way.

My feet obey of their own accord, turning me slowly. My eyes fill with tears as I fight it and fail to break free.

“She’s pretty. Young. Good connections,” Yardly slurs .

The three of them study me again, longer this time.

“Are you a virgin?” Ellis asks in a cold, detached voice.

I gape at him. “I-”

“It doesn’t matter. If she’s untrained, we’ll train her,” Yardly says, cutting off my words. “Better if she’s broken in, less tears.”

Bently leans back, a glass of scotch in his hand. “Your father wants a lot for you. Not just money. You’re costing a pretty fortune, so we need to make sure you’re worth our investment.” His eyebrow raises as he lifts a glass of red wine to his lips, clearly enjoying my discomfort.

I stare at my hands as his words ricochet around my head, hitting like bullets. Worthless beta. That’s what everyone thinks. But I’m a thing to be sold? That makes it worse. Especially when I feel certain I won't survive their affections long.

I need to run before it’s too late.

“You’re a beta. Nothing special. You’re okay to look at, but I’ve seen better. Bigger breasts, bigger ass. Nicer face. You’re average. But you’re good at your job. Obedient. You’ll be a good breeder,” Ellis says with no emotion.

My fingers tense, but other than that, I don’t react. On the outside. On the inside, I’m dying.

“You’ve got good breeding hips.”

My head gets light.

“Your father said we could try you tonight,” Bently says with a smirk.

I inhale so fast I choke. “What?” It’s the first sound I’ve made in ten minutes.

My heart races, and I suddenly wish I wasn’t in these stiletto heels. Everything inside me screams to run, but I can’t move a single limb from this command that has me frozen.

He’s given me to them to try? Any tiny little feeling I had left for my father evaporates in an instant. He’s more of a monster than I thought.

The command loosens just a fraction. I take a step backwards.

“Stop!” Ellis barks.

I stop immediately.

I try to fight the bark, but there’s nothing I can do. I’m frozen. We’re all at the mercy of someone stronger than us.

Unless we can find a way to escape.

I glance around and notice at last how empty the restaurant is. There’s no one to save me. I can’t even see any staff.

“Take your dress off,” Bently barks again, leaning forward with his hands flat on the table .

I struggle, I fight, but in the end, my arms lift, and I peel the skin tight black dress down, letting it drop to the floor.

Tears stream down my cheeks, and soft whimpering noises slip from my throat as I try to fight the bark.

This is everything that is wrong with the world. This is why it’s not fair. Alphas are already stronger, but to have a weapon that strips a person of their free will, it’s sick.

I stand there trembling, practically naked in front of these loathsome alphas.

The three of them stare at me. Violating me with their eyes.

Yardly gets up and grabs my wrist, pulling me towards him. I stumble over the dress, but then I’m pulled into his lap. I sit there as he mouths the back of my shoulder and runs his hands up my arms.

I can feel his erection pressing into my ass cheek. Bile races up my throat, but I swallow it.

Perhaps my heart will explode in my chest and rid me of this problem.

They talk amongst themselves, laughing, but I ignore them. I need to get out of here. I need to escape. Anything.

I can’t move. They keep locking me down with alpha commands. Don’t move, stay still, shut up.

His hand coils around my stomach and pulls me back painfully. I cry out, and the three of them laugh.

I feel so gross, so dirty.

So afraid.

I move into myself. Everything feels so far away. I’m aware of their touches, the laughter, and the hideous sounds of them eating, but I’m also on the beach, staring out at the ocean. The water is cold on my feet. Two images overlaid over the top of each other.

I feel numb and cold, but my head is floating.

I spot movement and watch it curiously. A figure storms into the restaurant. I know that person.

The world comes back to painful focus. Hope ignites in my chest.

Please. Please. Forgive me. Don’t leave me here. I will do anything. Just please save me, just this once.

Tyr, I need you.

“Get up!” Alpha Tyr Fate barks with a strength that has me almost weeping in awe.

I obey at once, even though Yardly holds me tight, even though it hurts.

“Let go of her!” Tyr thunders. The sound is so deep and furious that it seems to reach every corner of the room.

The arm immediately disappears. I scramble towards Tyr and snatch up my dress .

“Let's go.”

I don’t listen to their arguments with Tyr. The threats or shouts. All I know is that Tyr’s bark is stronger. He’s stronger. He saved me.

Saved.

I am saved.

We get to the front of the restaurant, and I resist, gasping and struggling to breathe properly. He pauses at the door, turning back to look at me. With so much gentleness, he helps me pull my dress on, and then, with my wrist held in his firm hold, he leads me from my terror and out into the hotel.

In the lift, I keep my eyes down and ignore everything. It’s not until I’m back in the suite that I explode into action, freeing myself and rushing to the bathroom to be violently sick.

I’m covered in sweat and shaking when I’m done, but I can still feel his touch on me, so I turn on the and step in. I don’t even bother pulling off my clothes. I just sink to the floor in the shower stall, under the cold water, and start to sob.

“Ryn?”

I refuse to look up.

“Aura?” The familiar nickname pulls me back to the here and now. I didn’t think I’d ever hear it again.

I peel open my eyes and find Digs in the shower with me. He reaches out, but hesitates when I flinch.

“Okay, okay, I won’t touch you. Just tell me how to help you. Tell me what makes this better?”

I shake my head and put my face back on my knees.

He waits and then lets out a curse.

His arms close around me, heavy and warm and not at all like Yardly’s. I relax in his arms, leaning into him. My Digs.

“You’re safe. Nothing’s going to hurt you now.” He rocks me, whispering the words over and over, until finally, he stands up and carries me into a bedroom.

“I’m going to undress you now, Aura. But I’m just getting you out of your wet clothes and into something you can sleep in.”

I don’t argue with him. Digs pulls off his clothes and gets changed. He comes back, appearing as quietly as he disappeared, and pulls off my wet clothes, throwing the dress and shoes away. He dries me carefully and then hesitates.

“I’m not looking. Just take it off quickly so you can get dry.”

I reach up with trembling hands and unsnap my bra. He pulls a thick jumper that smells like him over my head. It reaches my thigh, so I shuffle the underwear off.

“Right, you’re going to go to sleep now. No work, no phones, just sleep.”

He helps me into bed and then tucks the blankets in around me. I’ve got my eyes squeezed closed as he backs out of the room.

I can’t bear to face him. I can’t bear to face the world.