Our Deceptive Heat (When it Raines Omegaverse #3)

12. Ryn

Chapter twelve

Ryn

You think I’m just a pretty thing, but I’m so much more- Ryn Raines

I wake up several times throughout the night, vicious dreams chasing me. But in the darkest hours, I wake up face-to-face with Envy. Mako is leaning against the wall, watching, but Envy is stroking my face.

I lick my lips, trying to find the words to say something, anything, but he puts a finger on them, silencing me.

“It’s okay, Ryn. We’re here. No one will get past us,” he whispers and shifts even closer. The tips of our noses touch.

“Why didn’t you tell us you were in trouble?”

I squeeze my eyes closed.

“I thought you hated me,” I whisper.

“Never! We could never hate you.”

“I left, and you’ve all been-”

“Hurt, but hurt feelings don’t equal hate. And none of us hate you. You are our Ryn. Our friend. Part of our family, no matter how far you run.”

A tear slips down my cheek. “I missed you.”

Envy sighs, his breath fanning my face. “Let us help you, Ryn.”

I shiver but don’t answer. What can I say?

Eventually, I fall asleep, and this time, it’s dreamless.

I wake up in the morning alone. Everything comes back in a rush of distorted images that makes my head ache, but I push it aside.

I don’t know why I thought I was in my suite last night, but this is clearly the band’s.

There is a delicious smell coming from behind the door, but I don’t know whether to go out or not. I’m only wearing the jumper. Sure, it covers me but…I’m all naked underneath, and somehow that makes me feel more exposed than it should.

Can’t hide forever. I straighten my shoulders and step out.

Digs sees me and smiles. “Morning, Aura.”

I tense and force myself to relax. Aura? So, it really wasn’t a dream.

“Morning. What happened to the concert?” I ask nervously.

“We got food poisoning,” Tyr says flatly. “All four of us at the same time. Couldn’t possibly perform.”

I open my mouth to argue, but last night slams into my head.

“Thank you,” I mutter.

Tyr just stares at me over his laced fingers.

Digs pulls out a chair for me and indicates for me to sit down. The hotel room is glaringly white. The carpet is white, walls are white, the island and kitchen are white, even the plastic chairs and lounge are white.

I blink around and notice Mako sitting on the couch.

“Here!”

I take the coffee Tyr holds out to me and slip into the seat. Mako slowly makes his way to the table and sits down.

Digs slides a plate of bacon and eggs in front of me. My stomach turns, but I pick up the knife and fork and force myself to eat.

When I’m finished, they remove the plate and give me another coffee.

“What was that?”

Tyr isn’t looking at me. He’s looking out the window. The black leather jacket is one I haven’t seen before, but it suits him. He’s still got a bit of last night's eyeliner around his eyes. It brings out the colour.

I can’t look at him for long.

“They are my pack-”

“BULLSHIT!” Digs thunders, standing up so fast his chair flies back. “They are not your pack!” He gets up in my face, and when I don’t look up, he drops to his knees. His white top stretches across his shoulders, heavy necklaces jingle.

“They’re going to be,” I whisper.

“What?”

It’s Envy who whispers it. My eyes snap to him as he brushes his white hair out of his face so he can see me better.

Digs wraps his huge hand around my ankle and draws my attention back to him.

I may as well just get this out in the open.

“My father arranged it,” I say with a shrug and nonchalance I don’t feel.

“You can’t be serious. You can’t go through with it!” Tyr snarls.

Ice fills me. “It's cute that you think I have a choice, Tyr! I’m not like you. I can’t afford to just go out into the world and do what makes me happy with the people I love.”

Mako is wearing a floor length black jacket, but now he touches Digs’ shoulder, and when one alpha moves, the other takes his place.

“Do you want them?”

“Are you fucking high? Did I look like I wanted them? Have you seen them? Did you tell them?” I snarl at Tyr. “What am I asking? Of course, you told them, you four share everything.”

Envy flinches hard and turns away. For a second, I want to chase his reaction.

Mako smirks. “Fish, I think you’re growing teeth.”

I snarl at him. He puts a hand on my thigh while he stands up, the feel of it scorches through my anger, leaving me flustered and voiceless.

“What do you want to do?” Envy asks. “You clearly aren’t happy being this marketing guru.”

“I’m a songwriter,” I snarl.

“You’re a performer,” Envy snaps.

I shake my head. “I’m trying to make enough money to disappear.”

Those words don’t go down well, I can see the protests rising in all four of them. Tyr storms around the room. Mako shakes his head in immediate denial. Digs protests loudly, but it’s Envy who stares at me, silently challenging me, and it’s that challenge that hits me hardest.

“If you need money, we can just give it to you,” Digs shouts.

“And then it will dry up, but if I have a reputation as a songwriter, I can earn money wherever I am,” I growl back. It’s not like I haven’t thought this through.

“You owe us a song,” Tyr says in a growl; clearly, he’s figured out what my plan is.

“Yes, the best song I’ve ever written. It will be fantastic, and you’ll tell everyone I wrote it, and I will be set for life. My father won’t be able to sell me. I’ll be a valuable asset to Alpha records. You get rich and famous, and I disappear.”

The four of them stare at me like they think I’ve lost my mind. I probably have. I’m desperate and twitchy, and I feel a frantic need to start working.

“That’s a really risky plan, Ryn,” Mako says hesitantly .

I shrug. “It’s not my only plan, but this one allows me the most freedom.”

Tyr leans back in his chair and looks at the ceiling. “Well, have you thought about-”

“I’ve thought about running away. My father’s money makes that option null and void unless I want to live in a forest or a mountain. Or a pack, I mean if I could find one that wanted me, I just have to make sure they won’t rape me, hit me, take my money, or any other of a million other things that I might be able to find out with time but can’t right now.”

“Why haven’t you met any packs?” Envy asks instead, ignoring the charged silence that has filled the hotel room.

I stand up and start pacing. “Did you really think my father was going to allow me to court a pack? I’m a commodity. I can be bought, and I can be sold. How do I explain it better? I know, I am a thing.”

“Locke-”

“Is dealing with his own issues.”

“Lia-”

“Has a new pack and has just survived her own hell.”

Tyr opens his mouth. I hold up a hand.

“If you say Raider or Kelly, I will thump you until your brains return. Who the hell do you think sponsors their sports? My father controls everything,” I say bitterly. “It took all my negotiating to get Dad to drop Locke from the label and not press charges against Mirakill for kidnapping an out of her mind omega. Oh, he wanted to.”

Envy puts his head in his hands and stares at the table. The defeat in him makes me wonder just how much influence my father has had over their lives.

“You’re fucked.”

I bob my head. “Pretty much.”

“What makes you think, even if you produce this song, that your father will allow you to keep writing songs instead of selling you to-” he chokes off and lifts his head. “How do you know it will work?”

I stare at Envy, at the anger in his eyes, and I feel suddenly foolish and like a child.

“I don’t, Envy, but I have to try. I don’t want to be a thing, and I don’t want to live every day as what you guys saved me from last night. Further, I really don’t want to live in hiding and watching over my shoulder for the rest of my life, either.”

Envy stands up, the chair flying backwards. “We need time. No decisions until we all decide. I’ll be back,” he snaps and storms out of the hotel room.

Tyr glances between us and takes off after him.

Hurt and defeat, two twin emotions I’m extremely familiar with, fill me, and I sit back down, resting my head on my arms .

“It's stupid. I shouldn’t have asked.”

A hand rests on my back. I don’t lift my head. I don’t deserve the compassion, and the fact is I’m frantic because there’s one thing I know above all others. One thing that frightens me; I just made my father really mad, and it will cost me.

He’ll take it from me piece by piece.

I stand at the concert where Mako can see me. He keeps checking on me. I wish he wouldn’t. It’s getting hard to hide the tears.

Tyr looks like a god out there, they all do. The lights, the sounds, the music. My music being sung on a stage in front of thousands of people.

But not with my voice.

With each day, my desperation gets worse. I don’t know how much more I can take. I just need to do something. Anything. I pick up my phone and make a call.

“Kelly?”

“Hey, beautiful, what can I do for you?”

I choke back a sob. “Kelly!”

“Ah, shit, what’s happened? I’ll fly back.”

“No, don’t. There's no point. I’m on the road with a band at the moment.”

I glance up and find Mako watching me. Glaring at me. I turn my back on him.

“Kelly, did you find a pack?”

Kelly pauses. “I’ve found some people who might be able to help you.”

“You need to hurry,” I whisper. “I’m running out of time.”

“Ryn? What’s going on? What’s happened?”

I yelp as the phone is plucked from my hand. I whirl and find Mako staring down at me. His eyes blaze with fury. He puts the phone to his ear and growls into it.

“Ryn is busy.”

Then he hangs up, and in a fit of temper, crushes my phone.

I stare at the broken pieces in horror. “Are you insane?”

“Stop plotting and enjoy this?”

My temper already driven to the edge by fear snaps.

“Enjoy this? Enjoy this!” I shove his chest, feeling out of control. Tears of rage fill my eyes and spill over, which just makes me angrier. “Watching someone else sing my songs and live my life, and I’m supposed to stand here and be happy?”

Mako steps back, shocked .

I shove him again and whirl away from him. Tony catches me, big warm arms wrapping me in a surprisingly comfortable embrace.

“Get back on stage and leave her alone!” Tony barks. When Mako doesn’t move, the old beta practically roars at him. “NOW, Mako!”

I know the moment he leaves, I can feel it. He takes the warmth with him.

“All right, come with me. I think we need to have a vault conversation,” Tony says.

He drags me back to the dressing room and gets me settled with a water and then gives me the look.

I’ve seen the look on TV, on other people’s parents. My parents have never given me the look.

“Tell me what’s going on, Ryn. We’ve known each other for years, and this is the first time I’ve seen you this distracted and unhappy.”

I break down. The words are hard to say at first, but then they pour out of me, ripped from my soul. I tell him everything. Every secret, including how I feel about the band, my music, my father, and the plans for my future. I lay it all out for him, and Tony holds me in his arms like I dreamed my father would do, and pats my back, and tell’s me it’s going to be okay. Just get it out.

There’s only one thing I don’t tell him.

One secret that’s going to cost me everything.