Out of the Shadows (Hudson Security #1)

Chapter 21

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

B ean stood and stretched, her stomach grumbling loudly. Hours had passed since she’d eaten those delicious donuts, she’d worked through lunch, and her frustration was at its boiling point. It was nearly seven in the evening, and she’d sent the cyber team home two hours earlier. She scanned her far monitor, impatience gnawing at her as the various programs—hers, the cyber team’s, and Tiny’s—were running at a snail’s pace. They were no closer to finding out who had gone after Gavin.

She thought about heading to the staff kitchen to see if there were any leftovers remaining from the lunch Gavin had delivered, but her attention snagged on the two brown boxes sitting at the edge of her desk. Despite her hunger and growing irritation, they brought a smile to her lips. She chuckled as she peeked at the boots and set them aside. Hiking boots. The man had bought her hiking boots .

She slipped off her beautiful Ferragamos, opened the smaller box, and carefully removed the Louboutins. After putting them on, she walked the length of her office and couldn’t help but stare at her feet in wonder. She still wasn’t quite able to wrap her brain around the fact that Gavin bought these for her. Not only because of the hefty cost of the beauties—they were even more expensive than the Ferragamos—but because the moment she’d seen them online months ago, she’d practically salivated. She’d really, really wanted them, but they were way out of her price range. Yes, she pulled in a fantastic salary at Hudson Security and could technically afford them, but she hadn’t been able to justify the price.

She kicked a foot out and bit back a swoony sigh, because they were that freaking gorgeous. They gave the illusion of real-life glass slippers with just enough sparkle to catch the eye, but not too much so that she’d look ridiculous wearing them to work.

Having spent her entire childhood in boarding schools, she’d been a sucker for fairy tales and Disney princesses. The magical and fanciful stories had been so different from her own life that they’d captivated her.

By the age of four, she’d been considered a gifted child prodigy in both math and science, so she knew fairy tales weren’t based in reality. By the time she’d hit her teens, she’d still harbored a secret love of those stories, but all she’d had to do was look at her own life to know those happily ever afters didn’t exist. At least, not for her.

Facts. Hard work. Persistence.

For as long as she could remember, those were her three pillars.

But one look at the pretty shoes had those old, fanciful longings stirring. And Gavin gifting them to her had her wishing for things she had no business wishing for.

With a sigh, she slouched into her chair. They were friends. Good friends. Good friends who were attracted to each other. She may not be the best when it came to interacting with people, but she’d stood on the sidelines and in the shadows observing others her entire life. She knew people, could read them. Yes, she’d made mistakes here and there, but she was almost certain that her newfound attraction to Gavin wasn’t one-sided.

Just thinking about him had those butterflies in her belly launching. Partly from excitement, and partly from nerves. After all, she hadn’t been with a man in far too long. Years, in fact.

She winced. Nearly seven years if she wanted to be exact.

Her last and only adult relationship had ended in disaster. Geoffrey, the man she’d thought she’d loved—the man she’d thought loved her back—had been a liar. He’d not only lied to her, but to everyone, including their country. Knowing he had deceived and used her for over two years to gain access to classified information had been humiliating. The man had played the long game with her and had nearly succeeded since she’d been too inexperienced, too na?ve... too stupid to figure it out. Until it had almost been too late.

Shortly after joining Hudson Security, she’d attempted to do a casual, one-night thing with some guy she’d met at a bar over on neighboring Whidbey Island. She was no stranger to casual—the two experiences she’d had before Geoffrey had been the epitome of casual friends-with-benefits situations—but the sex-with-a-complete-stranger thing, the him-not-remembering-her-name-two-minutes-after-he’d-pulled-out thing hadn’t been for her. Between the embarrassment and shame of what had happened with Geoffrey, and the cheapness she’d felt after that one-night stand, it was safe to say she was wary of ever getting involved with anyone again.

But Gavin was different. She knew him.

You thought you knew Geoffrey, too, and look how that turned out.

Her stomach twisted. No, dammit. The two men were nothing alike .

Geoffrey had been arrested for treason. God knows what had happened to him after he was convicted and sentenced. She’d tried to find out, but whoever was in charge of him had buried his info deep. Too deep to be worth the risk of finding out more.

It wasn’t the same with Gavin. Not at all. If Gavin was deceitful, he was conning a whole hell of a lot of people. Granted, that’s exactly what Geoffrey had done, but she had learned her lesson and had done extensive research on both Gavin and MacKay before joining Hudson Security. So it was apples and oranges, right?

Stifling a groan, she stared at her ceiling tiles. It was times like these that Bean wished she had a close girlfriend. Someone she could talk to and hash everything out with. Yes, she was friends with Esme and even Owen, but not like that. She occasionally got together for drinks with her coworkers, but she mostly kept to herself. It was a habit. Years of virtual solitude tended to do that to a person. Combine that with her workaholic tendencies, and she was lucky she even knew her colleagues on any sort of personal level.

The Hudson Security crew were an odd bunch. The men were a tighter group than the women. Granted, aside from her, there were only six other women on payroll out of the twenty-odd employees, but still. In her humble opinion, the entire crew were a ragtag bunch of emotionally unavailable people. Well, maybe not Xander. He seemed pretty well-adjusted. And not Alvarez either, since the man was basically married—but he was fairly new to the team, so she wasn’t really sure he counted. However, everyone else was a bit closed off. Whether it was due to their time in the service or whatever alphabet agency they’d been a part of prior to joining the Hudson Security team, it didn’t seem like any of them were in the market for any sort of long-term or meaningful relationship .

Tired of her back-and-forth questioning thoughts, Bean rose from her chair and crossed her office. Opening her storage closet, she looked at herself in the full-length mirror that hung on the back of the door. Really looked at herself. Dark-brown hair, blue eyes. Average in both looks and build. At five-three, she was shorter than she’d like, but she made up for it with her shoe collection.

She glanced down again at the beauties Gavin had given her, and her stomach did that fluttering thing again. If she was reading things right—and she was pretty sure she was—Gavin liked her, looked at her as more than just a friend, was attracted to her. It wasn’t quite a fact, more of a theory at this point, but she’d never heard of him gifting anyone else anything. Let alone shoes that cost over twelve hundred dollars. Still, it was only a theory.

However, there was one certain fact she was sure of. She was one thousand percent attracted to Gavin Frazier. He stirred a want in her that she hadn’t felt in a long, long time.

They were both adults, and it was okay for them to see what happened, right? She didn’t want to jeopardize her position at Hudson Security, but if they went into it with their eyes wide open and with ground rules, everything would be fine. However, she could also be jumping the gun, and her theory could be totally off base.

She glanced again at her shoes, and the corners of her lips ticked up. Doubtful. Highly doubtful.

Mind made up, she fluffed her hair, adjusted her blouse, and smoothed her skirt. Though a slew of nerves remained, she closed the closet door.

First things first. She needed to thank him for the gorgeous shoes. There was nothing wrong with that. Besides, she knew that it was unlikely Gavin would make a move on her. One, he was her boss. Two, he was her friend. Those two facts alone would most likely keep her in the friend zone forever. Which... would be a damn shame.

It’s not like she was going to try to give him a nudge or anything. Or to see if her theory had any merit. She was simply going to thank the man for his gift. It was the polite and kind thing to do.

She made her way to his office and stood in front of his closed door. As she raised her fist to knock, a smirk grew over her lips.

Right.